


One of Three

by TotalFanFreak



Category: Boondock Saints (Movies)
Genre: Brotherly Love, F/M, Falling In Love, Friendship/Love, Gen, Gun Violence, Multi, Other, Polyamory, References to Depression, Religious Conflict, Revenge, Survivor Guilt, Triplets, Violence, mafia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-08
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2018-10-01 04:20:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 99,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10180553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TotalFanFreak/pseuds/TotalFanFreak
Summary: She had cocooned herself, letting routine and safety run her life. After everything she knew it wasn't much of one, and because she decided to do the right thing her life's about to hit a tailspin in some of the worst and most fantastic ways.





	1. The Most Boring Person in the World

**[I tried to get my brain to work and this is what came out. This one is for what’s whirring in my head watching the Boondock Saints. All I can say is I tried so hard on the accent!]**

“…That’s the best way to start the day is a dog on a jet ski.”

“That it is, Jen. Sadly, on a tragic note, the body of Ariel Ziva has just been recovered. Authorities say she was discovered by a lone hiker off the coast of the Weir River. There are many similarities to her murder as to the string of homicides afflicting the com –“

“I think that’s enough of that this morning, eh, Shep?”

Turning off the television, Sera looked down at her trusted Sheltie – Shepherd, before rolling her eyes. He hadn’t even budged. Eyes still closed waiting for her to be ready and out the door.

“Fine, lazy, let me get my coffee, and we’ll be ready.”

Twisting the lid on her travel mug she bent down to grab her bags.

“Let’s go to work, Shep.”

On the word ‘go’ the dog came to life, ears perking, and on his feet.

“Yeah, that’s a good boy, I got your leash. Ready?”

He spun in a circle as if to say – “Of course, woman, I’ve been waiting for you.”

Her nose crinkled in silent laughter, clipping his leash on and letting him lead her to the apartment’s parking garage. She noted a lot of the spaces were already emptied, as she loaded up her bags in the hatchback before letting Shep in through the driver’s door so he could get into his doggy car seat. Circling the little box to get comfortable, he let himself face out the front, as she slid into her own seat. Pulling out of the building she looked up at the dark sky, she knew it was already raining but it looked worse now that she was out in it.

“Going to be a groggy day, boy.”

One of his ears flicked back but he kept facing forward. Going down her regular route she was about to go past the light when she noticed a pile-up near the intersection. Seemed some were in too much of a hurry and didn’t take caution of the slippery road. As far as she could tell, no one was hurt, which was a relief. Not so calming was the fact she would be late if she waited for the mess to be cleaned up. Making a U-turn she made her way down another road, and she was getting jittery that it wouldn’t lead her to where she needed.

“This is what happens when we do things the exact damn way every freakin’ day.”

She had hated routine at first, but now she had let it take her in like a blanket. Routine meant safety now, and this unfamiliarity was unnerving. Only when she recognized one of the street signs did she start to breathe again.

_When did I become like this?_

She vowed to learn more of the roads on a sunnier day after this. Making her way down to get to the main road, Shep started barking.

“What is it?”

Looking where he was, it took her a few moments to see through the curtain of drizzle to see a lone man walking down the sidewalk. Her first instinct was to stop for him, the man not even having an umbrella to help him through the slosh, but then thought better of it, the news report from earlier flashing in her mind. As she passed by, she couldn’t help the weight her heart, her mother’s voice lurching in her ears.

“How dare you Seraphine Louisa! Deuteronomy 22:4, child! Don’t stand idly by - you’re supposed to help one in need!”

She almost thumped her head on the horn. _Why the hell did her voice_ _choose to come up now?_ She knew for a fact her mother wouldn’t have picked up a stranger either, truth be told her mother wouldn’t have been driving in the first place, preferring to be the passenger than the driver. But, as with most cases, her mother was right, and she’d feel like shit all day if she didn’t at least go and ask. Circling back around she felt a jolt in her chest.

“I swear if I get murdered for this…”

He probably wasn’t even there anymore; maybe he just needed to see a neighbor and went out without thinking of an umbrella. But, of course, he was there, up further ahead now, but still there. Head tucked down and hands in his coat pockets.

Shepherd barked again and taking a shaky breath and small prayer she rolled down the window.

“Um, excuse me! I couldn’t help notice you’re getting drenched out here, would you like a ride?”

The man had been lost in thought when she had pulled up, only mild curiosity when she rolled down her window. Yet now his focus was fully on her and she couldn’t help but feel her face heat up. He was much younger than she anticipated his dark blonde hair now close to deep brown by the rain, his blue eyes crinkling at the corners as he approached her.

“Aye, perhaps the Lord heard me prayers after all, sending one of his angels out to aide me. Thank ye, lass.”

Her flush deepened, another unexpected detail, she had been bleary-eyed before but the lilt in his voice tickled her ears, knocking her awake.

“It’s not a problem, I’m afraid you’ll have to sit in the back.”

He nodded, swiftly getting into the seat, closing the door before it flooded the car.

He grinned at her while rubbing his hands together, obviously from the rain chilling his skin. “Y’sure there wasn’t, love? Noticed ye made a nice circle ‘round.”

Her red face remained. _Love? Really?_ “Sorry, it’s just hard to know what exactly to do anymore, with how the world is. If you want there should be a towel in the very back so you can dry off a little bit. It’s clean, I promise.”

“Agree with that, gotta ta take precautions nowadays. But I do appreciate it, lass.”

She shrugged a shoulder. “Like I said it’s no problem, you should probably be thanking Shepherd more; he’s the one that spotted you. I guess it’d help to know where you’re going or you’ll end up at work with me.”

He grinned again, the towel in his hand as he ran it through his hair. “Suppos’ so. Though I wouldn’t mind spendin’ the day withcha, lass. I work down there at th’ meat plant on Newmarket Square. Should be givin’ ye my thanks then, ey, boy? Me own damn brother took off without me this mornin’.”

“I’m sorry, is that why you didn’t have an umbrella?”

“Oh, no, just don’t have one. Rain won’t kill us, can’t believe the little bastard took off though. Pardon me language on that.”

She chuckled. “It's fine, so you both work together?”

“Aye, got him the job there meself, and this is how he repays me. I say one thin’ bout his ugly mustache an’ he up an’ takes off.”

She laughed. “Oh, so you were just being mean, I see now.”

“Wasn’t mean, lass, it t’was honest. He isn’t doin’ himself any favors with that mess on his face.”

“Maybe so, but I probably would have left you too.”

“Awww, both of ye do wrong then. His loss, get to tell him I was chauffeured by a gorgeous girl when I see him.”

She couldn’t think of anything to say to that, her palms starting to sweat on the steering wheel.

“Sorry there lass, didn’t mean ta make ye uncomfortable.”

“It’s okay, just don’t know how to follow that up.”

“How about a name fer starters?”

She smiled again. “Uhh, you first.”

“Aye, fair ‘nough. Connor MacManus at yer service, love, or yours ta mine as it were on this occasion.”

“Seraphine – Sera Shafir.”

He grinned, his eyes lighting back up. “Seraphine? I see t’Lord did send me a true angel indeed."

“Thank you, wasn’t the meaning my mom was going for, but I like yours more so –“

“And what t’was yer ma going for, lass?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to –“

“No, I’m curious, if ye want ta tell.”

“The gem, my mom named all of us after jewels.”

“Ahh, I see, so you have brothers and sisters then?”

“One of each, I’m one of three in fact.”

His eyes twinkled. “As in a matchin’ set? Well, then lass we have more in common than I first thought.”

“What do you mean?”

“Me and me brother are twins, ye see. Fraternal which is sad fer him since I got all the looks, but that’s how t’Lord wanted it. ‘Fraid our journey’s comin’ to an end, love if ye don’t care to plop me off over there.”

Getting as close to the building as she could, she parked to the door.

“It has been wonderful, Seraphine, I bless ye for pullin’ over ta let me in. I’ll warn ye not ta be doin’ that all the time. Be keepin' yerself safe.”

Battling with herself her mouth spilled. “If it’s still raining I could pick you up if you like.”

She flushed again as he settled back in the seat, hand still on the handle. “I couldn’t ask that of ye, love.”

She shrugged. “It’s not an issue for me, I mean you and your brother would have to sit in the back again, but –“

“Yer already been gracious enough ta help me. Ye might not say so, but I wouldn’t want ta keep ye from anything.”

She chuckled. “Mr. Macmanus I’m afraid you’ve had the pleasure of meeting the most boring person in the world. You’re not keeping me from anything. I work and go home, that’s usually it.”

“Ye have ta forgive me, but that’s hard ta believe. A girl like ye boring…”

_A girl like me?_

She didn’t know what that meant but her chin tucked to her chest anyway.

“I didn’t mean any harshness, love, just yer too enticing ta be trite or boring.”

She smiled up at him but didn’t say anything.

“If yer really wantin’ ta see me again that badly, I’d never deny ye.”

“Thank you for that, Mr. MacManus, what time should I be here?”

He stepped out of the car with a smile, hand held out. “Five o’clock, love, and call me Connor.”

Taking his hand, she shivered when he pulled it up to his lips. The chivalrous act was not something she was used to seeing much of.

Stuttering and reluctant she pulled it back. “I’ll see you at five then, Connor.”

He gave one last dazzling smile before going into the building. Sera let out a long breath, nerves unwinding as she looked at Shep.

“What the hell did I just do?”

He grunted, having no idea either when her eyes caught the clock on the dash.

“Oh, dammit!”

Even taking a different route she ended up later than ever for work.


	2. An Irish Hello

**Chapter Two – An Irish Hello**

Being fair to herself, she wasn’t as late as one would think. She was an art teacher at one of Boston’s private schools. It had taken forever to find a placement too; many of the schools had strict requirements. Mainly, they wanted someone of their own religion, which she could understand. Though it had been a tad dramatic when she had walked into an interview and the woman fainted when it was stated she was Jewish.

Being the only teacher for the subject she liked to come in a few hours ahead to set everything up and make sure her lesson plans were solid. She may pick one theme throughout the day but you didn’t want set things up for a twelfth grader as you would for someone in third. But that was out the window today, there were already children piled outside the door. Her schedule alternated between grades, and it was the poor first graders sitting outside the room. Many of the kids brightened when they saw her approaching.

“Good morning, Miss Shafir and Shepherd.”

Sera smiled down at the little girl, Molly. Teaching had not been her first career choice, but at times the kids truly did make it worth it. And she wanted to believe the children liked her well enough, though Shep may have more to do with it. The dog usually being asked to model on more than one occasion.

“Good morning, sweetheart. I hope none of you had to wait too long for me. I’m afraid I nearly got swept away by all the rain and was running late.”

She had said it enough for the class to hear, most shaking their heads, others still talking amongst themselves. Unlocking the door they all scrambled to their feet, getting to their assigned tables.

“Since there is so much water out today, I thought it’d be appropriate to work on our watercolors. We are going to go over a few facts first –“

A collective groan hit the walls.

“I know, I know, but we have to. It’s in my job description guys. When you have yourselves situated can someone tell me when did watercolor art begin?”

“The cavemen!”

“That’s correct, Trenton, can someone name a cave painting?”

“Lacroo?”

“Chateau!”

“They’re in France!”

Writing the answers on the board she turned to them.

“One at a time guys, remember we raise our hands to get a turn. But a lot of you are right. There are many drawing in France, but it’s Lascaux, just say it like Lasko, makes it easier. And it is Chauvet, not chateau, both are French but a chateau is more like a manor – a very expensive home. All right, I’m going to put the chapter lessons on the board, you can do the vocabulary and question sheet now while I set up for today’s lessons. It’ll be chapter six, remember to read it please.”

She passed out the papers from her folder, watching the children skim over the questions.

“There’s going to be a test next Monday. I want you to get an early start on studying. You know I don’t make it that hard but the last results I wasn’t too happy with. I know all of you can do better than that.”

The morning had been fun, despite all the gloom outside, she was hanging her last class’ pictures up on one of the clotheslines to let it dry when she heard a soft tapping on her door.

“Hi, Sera, ready for lunch?”

She glanced at the clock first, a little stunned to have time pass that quickly before turning her eyes to Claudette. She was a small blonde woman and one of the few teachers around her age range, the other, Janine probably waiting for them in the parking lot. She counted them both as friends, she could talk to them, and they would ask her to come along with them to lunch, even trying to get her to tag with one of them on their weekend plans. But Sera usually settled by keeping a distance, setting this as a work friendship and nothing more.

“Sure, let me grab my things, I need to grab the schedules, testing’s coming up soon and I don’t know which medium to use for eighth and up yet.”

Claudette gave a humbling smile. It was odd, the contrast of them all, Claudette so soft-spoken whereas Janine would ramble out whatever came into her head.

“I’m happy to see you’re adjusting well here. It’s been about, what, six months?”

Sera nodded as she tanked Claudette for opening the door, her arms a little more full with the leash and folders. “About that, I think I’m finding my niche.”

_I hope it lasts, that I can stay this time._

Janine waved to them from her car, a plume of smoke exiting her mouth as she dragged on her cigarette. It was then she realized the rain had halted, though the sky was still black as ink.

“You know you shouldn’t do that on school grounds, some of the kids are out for recess and can see you right now.”

Janine rolled her eyes but dropped the butt on the pavement, squashing the smoke out with her heeled shoe.

“So where to, ladies, I’m starving.”

Sera shrugged. “Doesn’t matter to me.”

“Well, aren’t you fun today.”

“Cloudy days always depress me, make me tired too.”

Janine perked, sliding into her seat with ease. “I don’t why, I love them, brings out the philosophical thoughts.”

Sera snorted. “Like what?”

“I don’t know, death? Look up at the cathedral, and how the gray looms over the graveyard. Total death right there.”

Sera could hear, as she and Shep filled up the back seat, Claudette’s little gasp as her hand went to clutch the cross that forever hung around her neck.

“Eh, how about something a little more cheerful, huh?”

“Okay, how about plans for next weekend, there’s an open Morisette concert, all the proceeds go to help fund the project to stop domestic violence.”

Claudette played with a loose strand on her sweater. “I’ll have to ask Toby what we’re doing.”

Janine beat the steering wheel. “See that’s your problem! You don’t need to go asking a fucking man what and when you’ll be doing something. If you want to go, go. If not, then don’t use him as an excuse.”

Sera thought they could be sisters sometimes, then thinking of death and her own sister she wilted.

“Okay, Janine, back it off, let’s let it go. I’m probably not doing anything, I’ll go with you.”

She got two sets of blank stares then and she shrugged. “What?”

Janine chortled but Claudette answered. “It’s just, you never do anything with us. Surprising is all.”

“Yeah, well, it may be a onetime thing, so neither of you get used to it. I don’t know how Shep’s going to like the noise anyways.”

Sera saw the back of Janine’s head tilt. “I didn’t think of that – would you be okay too? Like I won’t turn and see you foaming at the mouth or something will I?”

She thought for a minute. “As long as I'm not headfirst into the strobe lights.”

“Oh.”

“Nevermind.”

“No! No way, you actually accepted a night out with me, and I’m taking it. Hell, I can figure something out for us to do, and if Claudette comes then I’ll bust her midnight cherry too.”

Sera laughed and wonder how that cross hasn’t been rubbed away yet.

“Okay, everyone, I know the bell’s about to ring, but you know I’m going to want that your croquis sketches the next time I see you. I’m not asking for a Degas or anything, just do your best so we’ll have something to broach the topic next time. Any references needed, my door is open or you can go to the chapter.”

She smirked to herself as the bell went off; she was getting better at timing herself. The class rushed out, leaving her to pick up the easels and smocks. Funny how a six year old is better at picking up after themselves than a teenager, she decided to let the brushes soak overnight, praying she’d make it in early tomorrow to rinse them off.

“It’s not raining anymore, boy.”

Shep trotted over, looking out the window with her. She remembered her promise, but now she didn’t know what to do. She conceded to herself that she was nervous to go back. A handsome Irish accent or not, it was still dangerous. Only knowing Mr. MacManus for twenty minutes wasn’t exactly an established level of trust, and then he’d have his brother with him. Two against one even if Shep was there to defend her wasn’t in good favor of her.

_It wouldn’t kill either of you to have a little faith. You act like the whole world is against us._

Her sister had been right on that, and maybe Sera didn’t want to go through life thinking everyone was out to hurt her anymore. She knew something like that wouldn’t magically happen overnight, but she could at least keep a promise. That much she could do, and if something did happen she had Shep and pepper spray in her bag.

“Let’s go, Shep.”

It’ll be okay.

Her heart still hammered a bit, and she breathed deep to get her pulse to slow down. Looking out she was glad the clouds were starting to break loose. Maybe the sun would be out tomorrow. She pulled up and parked, having arrived a little early, and watched people departing the plant. Many left their sullied white coats on, some casting curious peeks at her, checking around at the other vehicles maybe her Roadmaster was a tad conspicuous. Letting her seat lean back, she tipped her head back on the headrest, her hand wandering to the passenger seat to scratch at Shep’s ear. It wasn’t as cold as it had been this morning, the frigid air tapering on a more comfortable feel; it was relaxing, kind of nice. That was until there was a banging from her window.

Her eyes popped open. “Holy fuck!”

The shout caused Shepherd to commence his barking, and she shushed him as she opened the car door, seeing the blonde grinning ear to ear at her a bob of dark hair that must belong to his brother behind him.

“Didn’t mean ta scare ye lass.”

She rubbed a hand over her eyes. “Caught me off guard is all.”

The smile remained, the crinkling around his eyes causing her to smile back.

“Ya probably could’ve guessed it, but this one ‘ere’s me brother, Murphy. Told ye he’s an ugly thin’.”

“Fuck off, Conner.”

She couldn’t help but laugh at the snub, she could tell the teasing wasn’t meant to be hurtful, and it kind of delighted her reminding her of her own siblings’ antics. She held out a hand and hoped he wouldn’t notice the sweat.

“It’s nice to meet you, Murphy. I’m Sera.”

The brunette looked at her hand a moment, his hands had been busy looking through his coat pockets before, making her think she should’ve waited for the introduction. His hands stilled, eyes looking at her now, and she noticed his were the exact same blue as his brother’s. She was about to let her hand fall back to her side, when he grabbed it, pulling her in close and kissing both of her cheeks. The places his lips had touched instantly beginning to heat up.

“That’sa proper Irish greetin’ for ye, love.”

She gawked for a second. “And here I thought that kind of greeting would be considered French.”

At last, finding the crumpled pack of what looked to be cigarettes, he unfurled the pack before smirking.

“Gotta correct ye there, them snail eaters took it from us. Irish’re the romantics of Europe, y’know.”

She continued to blush. “I guess I do now.”

He had flicked open his lighter, lighting it and taking a puff in a millisecond.

“Sure do, love, if my brother had any common sense he’da showed ye how we say thanks.”

The response to that was a slap to the back of Murphy's head, Connor looking livid.

“Is é an ag fuck cearr leat? Ná bíodh caint leis an cailín mar sin, nó beidh mé ag insint ma.”

**(The fuck is wrong with you? Don’t be talking to the girl like that, or I’ll be telling ma.)**

Murphy wrenched away, clutching his fist. “I gcónaí ag rith go dtí ma, pansy tú cac. Ní raibh mé chiallaíonn sé liek sin sa chéad áit diabhal!”

**(Always running to ma, you pansy shit. I didn’t mean it like that in the first damn place!)**

Sera had to cover her smile as she watched them push each other. “Tá brón orm cur isteach ach is féidir liom a thuiscint cad atá tú ag rá agus mo mhadra ansy dul mar sin má tá an bheirt agaibh réidh …”

**(I’m sorry to interrupt but I can understand what you’re saying and my dog’s getting antsy so if you’re both ready…)**

Murphy twisted out of Connor’s arms, both having a look of incredulity. “Aye.”

They got into the backseat, Shepherd turning his head to look at the newcomers. Connor sat up to let the dog sniff him. “There’s me new best friend. Let ye replace ol’ Murph here, doggo.”

Murphy scowled at his brother, flicking the butt out the cracked windshield. “Shut it. So ya can speak a little Irish there, love?”

_What was it with the two of them and calling her that?_

“I can speak a few different languages.”

Connor turned to her then. “Das ist so? Und wie viele Sprachen hast du in deinem aresenal?“

**(That so? And how many languages do you have in your arsenal?)**

She smiled in the dash mirror. "Etwa acht.“ **(About eight.)**

She could feel the two smiling at her, making her flush, before she had never minded the casual banter and flirting. But with what became her daily life she was thrown off, not sure how to react, each one of their responses flustering her. At least that's what she blamed it on.

“Y en qué línea de trabajo conocéis a tantos?” **(And what line of work are you in to know so many?)**

“Sólo un profesor de arte.” **(Just an art teacher.)**

She could feel their confusion and she laughed. “My mother had thought it would come in handy. She had hoped her daughters could use their language skills to woo a few diplomats.”

“Aye, ours as well, not to woo, though it doesn’t hurt us none.”

“So where can I take you, boys?”

She could hear the leather to Murphy’s seat shifting. “Like I was tellin’ Connor, he needs ta thank ye proper like. So we’ll take ye out ta eat t’night.”

“Oh, that’s not necessary, I’m sure if the tables were turned you two would’ve done the same.”

She couldn’t turn but Sera could feel Connor’s stare on her. “Aye, but not the point, lass, fer once me brother’s right, can’t be lettin’ angels starve on our part. ‘Specially when one was brought to us at a fittin’ moment.”

“I would’ve let him drown out there.”

She smiled. “It’s very kind of you both but really it’s not –“

“Can’t take no fer an answer love, if yer too uncomfortable we understand. But like Connor said, not many people out t’ere do the right thing anymore. Gotta give ye some credit on that regard. Besides that, maybe we want to be a little selfish, and bask in the presence of the angel Seraphine. He was right fer once, you are a mighty exquisite creature.”

She blushed hearing a resounding slap, and Gaelic curses coming from Murphy. She laughed, butterflies still swamping her gut.

“How can I say no to that?”


	3. The Braid Unraveled

**One of Three**

**Chapter Three – How the Braid Unraveled**

They gave her directions to the restaurant, she could tell when she pulled up on the graveled lot that it was cozy, like a diner. A place where people went where they could get home cooking when they couldn’t get it at their actual home. She kept in a smile. It screamed a place for single men. The place was very busy inside, boisterous noises around the island of the bar, several of the men screaming at the television as whatever sport played on it. She continued to look around while the boys went to talk to the hostess at the podium, she could tell this wasn’t their first time here both leaning over the table with ease, talking to the girl who shoved them playfully as she laughed at whatever they said. They didn’t seem to have a problem with talking to people, comfortable and in their element when it came to chatting with whoever came in their path.

_I used to be like that._

She had, she had been very in tune with people. Now she could hardly look at someone without thinking they had a hidden agenda against her. She looked back up seeing them turn to her, and the girl beamed at her too, until she saw Shepherd. It was second nature for her to bring him everywhere, and since she had stuck to only a choice few places to go those people had gotten used to seeing the dog by her side. Pulling up her purse, she began searching for her wallet, skimming through for the little ID card. She could hear the boys saying something to her, but she thrust the card at the girl, her hand shaking with nerves and a bit of shame. The girl’s eyes drifted to the card, her eyes widening with realization.

“Oh, oh, okay ma’am, come this way to be seated.”

She hiked her tote strap back up on her shoulder, she followed the girl, keeping her head tilted to the floor so the boys couldn’t catch her eye. They were placed in a booth near the window, and she took a place near the edge seat, facing towards the outside. They were still focused on her, but she felt herself relax, their laid-back demeanor calming her.

“Care if we smoke, lass? Know this one didn’t think ta ask beforehand, but don’t wanta ruin yer appetite.”

She smiled, shaking her head. “I don’t mind, I appreciate you asking though.”

_**Gif by memoriesinatrunk** _

They pulled the ashtray between them, both lighting up simultaneously. She kind of felt the urge to clap at that. Casting a look at her, Connor waved his hand to disperse the smoke that was wandering towards her.

“I’m fine, really.”

He nodded. “Hope I don’t offend ye, but yer not blind are ya, lass?”

She grinned. “I hope the DMV isn’t giving the blind licenses now. No…I’m epileptic. It’s not a big deal or anything. But since I developed it I always had a service dog with me, and I’ve gotten used to it. I like having Shep with me.”

Murphy nodded, his eyes tender. “Can tell he’s a good one, we weren’t meaning anyting by it, we’re just curious. So how long you had ‘im?”

She petted Shep, his head sitting on the vinyl seat. “Ten years, give or take a few months. He’s been a good friend.”

“He protects ye well?”

She looked through the smoke at Connor. “He does. Though I’m pretty good at taking care of myself.”

The question had thrown her off, making her suspicious again. Why would someone need to know if the dog guarded her or not? But the chuckle that came with her answer released her tension.

“That’s good, all the shit happenin’ the last few months, a girl needs ta protect herself. Would it bother ye if we asked how you…err?”

The way he gestured and the shame in his eyes, she knew Connor was wondering about her ailment.

She shrugged. “It’s okay, I don’t mind talking about it. It’s just the looks you get with it, I don’t like people to feel nervous around me, definitely not sorry for me. But it happened when I was about five we were staying at my grandparents’ house for the summer. Their house was by a lake, and we stayed by the water a lot. One day, I’m not even sure what my parents were doing but my brother and sister and I decided to play on the dock since the tide had risen. We kept seeing who could get in the most without actually leaving the dock. Well, my luck I fell in face first and sunk like a rock. I ended up tangled up in some rope, and when I didn’t rise up my sister got my parents while my brother jumped in after me. He got me loose, but the lack of oxygen for so long it sort of rewired my brain you could say and not long after I started having seizures. But like I've said, I manage.”

She inhaled looking back up at them and was a bit startled that there was no pity in their eyes but something akin to nostalgia, affection.

“Good ya had yer brother and sister ta save ye. Been a sad day if we didn’t hadn't met.”

She snorted making their smiles expand to grins. And she noted that they were the same as well. Yes, their looks were different, but the mannerism of it. The way their lips slowly parted spreading until all their teeth showed like a kid on their birthday, eyes lighting up as the corners crinkled on the sides. Happiness taking over their whole face. It was wonderful and faltering.

Murphy flicked his ashes before pinning his gaze back to her. “Connor says you’re a triplet, yer brother and sister named after the angel hierarchy as well?”

“Told ye, they’re named fer jewels. Ye never damn listen.”

“I fuckin’ listen, ye didn’t say nothin’ bout it.”

“Did so.”

“Níl tú nach raibh fucking. Tá sé tú ag iarraidh a dhéanamh dom breathnú cosúil le asal.” **(No you fucking didn’t. It’s you trying to make me look like an ass.)**

“I don’t think you’re an ass.”

Murphy looked startled a minute while Connor chuckled. “Already forgot ye can understand us.”

“So what gems were you named after then?”

She smiled. “My mom was a gemologist, so she studied the uses and everything for all the jewels…we were only supposed to be twins, the ultrasound had only shown me and my brother so she had to come up on the spot for my sister, but our parents were able to decide on Selene and Seraphine for Selenite and Seraphinite. Both gems were said to be used to communicate with angels, our poor brother got the worst of it though. He was named Sapphire, which was supposed to symbolize heaven and devotion to God.”

Both boys had started cackling before she finished and she couldn’t help but join them.

“Feel sorry for yer brother, how the hell yer ma could do that to him?”

She shrugged. “She thought it was unique...and it's kind of a tradition - if there are multiples then their names have to start with the same letter. My mom and her sister were forced with it as well. It wasn't traumatizing when we were old enough he quickly shortened it to Sapph, and anyone who called him otherwise was likely to get beaten up for it.”

“Except yer ma and you girls?”

“Meh, mom and Selene were fine, but Sapph and I fight all the time. In case you thought I was demented it’s why I smile when you two go at it. I know it’s not anything mean or personal just something you do. It’s like a hug but with open hand slaps.”

They laughed again, nodding in agreement.

She grinned, her eyes then catching the smoke rings coming from Murphy’s mouth. “Oh, that’s neat.”

**__ **

**_Gif by Katieshox_ **

She let her finger poke through, changing the ring’s shape.

“All in de tongue, love.”

“All I can do with mine is roll my rs’s and make one of those clover things.”

Their brows lifted at that. “Well show us lass, we could use some good luck.”

She chortled shaking her head, glad to see the waitress coming. Giving their orders Connor ducked under the table before looking back at her.

“Ain’tcha goin’ to order for the pooch?”

“Oh, no, he’ll get his dinner when we get home.”

“Aww, come now, love, yer the one that said he’s why ye fetched me. He deserves a reward don’tcha think?”

She looked at Murphy who shrugged. “Told ye, lass, I would’ve let him drown out there, though it’d be wrong to make him watch us eat with nothin’ for him.”

Lucky for her the place had hard boiled eggs so she got two for Shep as they settled down with their drinks.

“So ye ma works with gems and such, so what’s yer da do?”

So they hadn’t caught the past tense in her sentence. And her dad…she didn’t really want to talk about him at the moment.

“Oh, no, that’s enough about me. You boys tell me something about you, besides being too manly for umbrellas and also having a knack for languages.”

Snubbing out the cigarette, Connor leaned closer to her. “Aye, and what would ye like to know?”

She shrugged. “Anything I guess, have you always lived in Boston? Do you like what you do? What’s your favorite thing to do? Anything.”

Murphy answered then. “Connor and I moved here around seven years ago, left Ireland with what we could carry on our backs.”

Sera's head tilted in interest. “Why’d you come here? Was there something specific you wanted to do or…?”

They both shrugged. “Seemed like what was right fer us. The American dream and all that wanted ta see what the fuss was about over here. Knew Boston was full of the Irish so best settled down here, right? Got offered the job at the plant not long after, make enough money to get a decent place ta live and some left to send off to our ma. S’good enough.”

Her stare softened. “That’s sweet that you take care of your mom like that. So you do like it here? Does it feel like home?”

Connor rubbed his face in thought. “Well now, don’t know how ta exactly explain that, nothin’s quite like Ireland, but yeah, it’s home…I guess anywhere is, ya know?”

She did know. She knew exactly. “Because you have each other, that’s what makes it home.”

They turned to each other before back to her, astonished glee in their eyes.

They answered her at the same time. “Exactly.”

She took a sip of her water before nodding. “I get it. I wish I could be with my brother and sister right now.”

“Why aren’tcha lass?”

She gulped on that, various emotions setting in.

_Because I can’t._

She fiddled with the napkin ring, Shep feeling her discontent whimpered until she patted him.

“I –“

Their food was brought over then, and she was glad not to have answered. Making herself busy by cutting up the egg for Shep before twiddling potatoes around her own plate. They were still waiting for her, expectant, their faces clear of judgment encouraging her to answer.

She pursed her lips, voice low to keep the trembling out. “We lost her, Selene, about a year and a half ago. We couldn’t protect her, and after a while, Sapph thought he couldn’t protect me so he went on his own. I still hear from him but not as much as I’d like. I miss him. I miss them both.”

_Every minute of every day I miss them._

It was quiet, and she started to look up when she felt surrounded on both sides. Her breath hitched when two pairs of arms wove around her. She lurched, surprised by so much contact, and yet so comforted, the familiarity welcomed.

Her ear was warmed by Murphy’s voice. “Couldn’t imagine goin’ through anything like that lass, you’re a brave one, no doubt on that. I might get aggravated by the stupid shit but I don’t know how I’d cope without him. Ye shouldn’t be alone though. And if ye need somebody…”

Her heart hammered, the fullness being too much. She wasn’t sure what they were offering to her, wasn’t sure if she even wanted anything from two people she just met, but she didn’t want to let go yet to be undone for so long, now being woven again, it felt joyous and torturous at the same time. Before long they pulled away, the warmth diminishing and giving her the chance to breathe again.

Licking her lips she looked at her plate. “Thank you.”

She sighed, not knowing why her hands wandered to her bag, Selene’s bag. Her hand clutching around a gaudy keychain that held a picture of them in it, she handed it to the boys. It was an unflattering picture of her, her face scrunched up with uninhibited laughter lying on her back with Selene collapsed on top of her with her own giggles, Sapph was next to them knees drawn up wanting to be angry but laughing in exasperation. She couldn’t remember how they had gotten in the exact position but Sapph had been dumb, putting his new cell phone in his back pocket and unaware had fallen back to sit somewhere cracking the screen to pieces. All that money wasted, her and Selene poked fun at him, the result is this, a friend taking the photo when they weren’t paying attention. Always the best pictures, the ones when you’re too caught up in the moment to care about everything else.

“I know we don’t look all that much alike.”

They didn’t, but they did. Of course, they weren’t identical, triplets hardly were, but they had similar features. They all had auburn hair from their mom, though Sera’s was the darkest, a borderline chestnut, Selene’s closer to strawberry blonde and Sapph’s somewhere in the middle. They all had hazel eyes, courtesy of their father, green overtaking with hints of a golden brown surrounding it. Her and Selene looked more alike, both having something akin to cherub cheeks while Sapph’s had diminished as he grew older the cheekbones more prominent.

“Now, that’s a lie love, all three of ye have the same secret smile going there. Like ye have something ta tell but you ain’t goin’ to.”

She felt bad when they left, like she had put them out and through the ringer. She was glad to not go into too much detail on things but it was still enough to be off-putting. Dropping them off at what she thought was a warehouse though they had assured her they lived there, they had both given her a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek and she was sad and a little glad she wouldn’t be seeing them again.

**[Guys, tell me if you think I should make the chapters longer. I never know anymore, I get to 2,000 words and I'm like maybe that's enough. But I get that it's not Gaelic, I've tried to find a translator for the old Irish but they only have standard, but when you think about it wouldn't they know standard Irish just as well since they grew up there? Just a thought.]**


	4. Easy to Find

**One of Three**

**Chapter 4 – Easy to Find**

Sera was close to rejoicing, it was Friday and she could stay in and sleep until Monday. The clouds had decided to stay for the last few weeks and she was tired and irritated. She wished it would just snow already and get it over with, most of her students felt the same way if the nodding off and staring out the window was any indicator. With the final bell ringing she dismissed her class, taking pity and not giving them any weekend assignments, she fetched the broom from the closet and started sweeping the sand and salt from the floors.

She had begun introducing textures and thought it best to start out with landscapes. A beach, someplace warm, anyplace where your eyes weren’t constantly watering due to the wind cutting them like glass or a nose that looked like a stop light, God, she missed Florida. It would be two years soon and she still missed home, she didn’t know how the north did it, and apparently getting deeper into the winter there was the chance of blizzards. Like actual blizzards, feet of snow that could swallow you up if you stepped too far out. It was insanity; they should have a massive sun lamp over the whole upper part of the country.

“Hey!”

She jumped, holding her broom out defensively at the voice. Seeing it was only Janine she let her muscles relax.

“Okay, Jackie Chan, calm down. You ready?”

“Ready for what?”

Her perfectly groomed brows went upward. “Oh, hell no, you’re not doing that. You promised me weeks ago you’d go out with me. Now I’m playing it by ear on it but I promise no flashing lights for you and not too much noise for Fido. Now get your stuff and come on.”

Sera had forgotten completely, and she wondered how Janine hadn’t. She was usually more scatterbrained with dates and now when Sera wanted to be left in isolation she was being drawn back out.

“Is Claudette coming?”

Janine blew her lips together. “What do you think? Her ‘boyfriend’ isn’t going to let her. Such bullshit. She could do way better than him.”

Sera nodded. It was agreeable, but Toby didn’t hit her, or cheat on her, and she couldn’t find it her place to say anything too obvious.

“Fine, so where are we going? Do I need to change for this?”

Janine eyed her up and down. “Kind of wish you were wearing more black, but you should be fine.”

Janine preferred darker colors but the glint in her eye told her something else was in mind. Getting into the car, Janine pulled over to a drive thru getting herself a soda while getting Sera a large coffee.

“I know you drink this shit like water, and I know you’re plummeting now so bottom’s up.”

Going through her purse she pulled out a mini liquor bottle. “Here Irish it a little bit, help put you in the mood for some fun.”

Sera didn’t care too much for liquor, especially in her coffee, but the phrase Janine said it stopped her making her mind drift to other things, specifically other people.

“You okay? You’re not flaking are you?”

“No, it’s not even five yet so I’ll hold out on the whiskey thanks, besides that doesn’t mix well with coffee.  So what are we doing that you have to get me drunk for? Going to hook up with some guys in the back alley or something?”

Janine grinned. “No, nothing like that. I just know…I know you don’t like going out, you’re not like Claudette though, it’s not because you’re shy. I can tell you’re afraid, I don’t know, we’re not doing anything crazy just a normal girl’s night. But I thought you could use some liquid courage so you wouldn’t strain yourself. I don’t want you to be scared. Especially of hanging out with me, God, you and Claudette are the only ones there who aren’t on a ventilator. You’re the only ones there to talk to.”

Sera gave half a smile. “I feel the same way.”

“That everyone there is close to their timer being up, for sure.”

“No, that I can talk to you guys, dumbass. I don’t like to talk to people much, but you guys, I like being around you both. In small batches.”

Janine rolled her eyes. “Thanks, I feel the exact same way.”

Splurging on a fancy meal, Sera realized she hadn’t eaten anything substantial in – well, probably months. She’d always been that way, she could cook, but her mind took off on her and she never remembered to eat and when she did it was usually something like a ream of Oreos.

“I want something chocolate now.”

Janine laughed, covering her mouth while she struggled to swallow. Sera giggled back, making sure the waiters weren’t watching while she gave small samples to Shep, she didn’t do it too often to break him but for the prices everyone should enjoy a taste. By the time they left they were both full enough to keel over, Janine more so since she had more than half a bottle of wine with her meal.

“I’m driving!”

“It’s my car!”

“And I’m being nice enough to let you ride in it, come on, where are we going now?”

Giving her directions they pulled up in front of a small house near the market district.

“This your house?”

“Fuck no, my ex’s.”

“Oh, Janine, I’m not breaking his windows or slashing his tires or something.”

“Nothing like that, much more juvenile, pop the trunk.”

She couldn’t help the shrug in amused aggravation at the packs of toilet paper in the trunk.

“Serious?”

The alcohol from the restaurant and the whiskey bottles in her purse were taking hold, her gait a little more wobbly than before.

“That fucker…whoa…that one, you know, maybe I didn’t love him, but I loved my shit. That I bought. And he takes me to fucking small claims and because he makes less money he got to keep everything that I paid for! It’s bullshit, so since he wants it, he can keep it. But a piece of shit needs to wipe up too so let’s have at it.”

She got over her reluctance when she figured nobody was home, and weaving the paper through the trees and getting as many rolls stuck in the gutters as she could they lobbied off before someone could catch them.

“I really wanted to blow up his mailbox though.”

“I know, but that’s against the law. You don’t want to go to jail over that mess.”

Janine had slouched in the seat, her eyes drooping as the alcohol rage dulled. “I know that, I don’t know why it’s pissed me off so much for. I just hate being screwed over like that. Fucker brought home whores there and everything, maybe it’s better I didn’t get the shit back, would’ve set it all on fire to disinfect the skank off it.”

“I’m sure there are less shitty guys out there.”

“Better be, or the whole female race is fucked.”

“We’re a race now?”

There was no answer, and looking over Sera groaned that Janine had passed out. It took forever to get her up after that, took longer to get directions to her house, and helping her stagger her way up she helped take off her coat and shoes and helped her to bed.

“Brighten up, tomorrow will be another day, sunshine.”

“Fuck you.”

Sera laughed. “Had fun too. See you on Monday.”

With that, she called a cab to take her to get her car and went home. Feeding Shep, she removed her own clothes and rinsed off, getting the sweat from running around in freezing temperatures.

“Maybe it’ll snow tonight Shep.”

He only smacked his jowls on that, hopping up on the bed with her, as she let her mind rest.

_The steps of the courthouse were packed. A media frenzy already taking over, she didn’t feel like talking to them though, so she lingered back near one of the pillars. Hoping some of the lawyers would make their debut down. She felt a light touch on her shoulder and saw one of the agents smiling at her._

_“So how does it feel to have this finally over?”_

_She shrugged. “Pretty good. It’s not going to get rid of what we’ve seen, and it’s not going to get our parents back so dominantly bittersweet. At least he’ll rot in prison though.”_

_The 'he' meaning one of the main underbosses. The man the ordered their father to be strung up in front of their home. Who personally mutilated their mother._

_The agent smiled wistfully. "True, there could be worse outcomes than this.”_

_“If you say so.”_

_“I know it doesn’t change the facts of many things, and we could place blame and do the ‘what if’s’ if you’d like but you’re free now. No more hiding or living in fear, you and your siblings can finally have a normal life.”_

_Sera heard her name and glancing over and saw Selene fast walking over to her, the swish of her skirt swaying as she came, the ever-present unsure smile on her face._

_“You’re right. Can at least try.”_

_Reaching her Selene put her arms around her, a tight embrace, Sera could feel her sister’s heart fluttering rapidly against her. And she inhaled the juniper scent from her hair._

_“We’re free, מיין שוועסטער ליבע.” **(My sister love)**_

_She couldn’t help the smile as she embraced her sister, feeling Selene’s warm tears of relief fall from her face to her neck._

_“We are, נשמה זיך.” **(Soul self)**_

_The only thing they needed now was to get Sapph and they could leave, embarking on whatever they wanted to next. Her smile remained as Selene pulled away, diminishing when she saw a sadness in her sister’s eyes. Selene began nudging her to the side, as if trying to get by her, at her insistence she moved about to ask why when a loud bang rang out. She cried out, seeing her shirt beginning to stain with crimson, the flaming pain between her shoulder and chest taking her breath. Raising her head she saw the anguish in her sister’s face, catching her own spilling of crimson from the gaping wound of her neck._

_“Selene!”_

_Forgetting her own pain, she pulled her jacket off to try and stop the flow of blood. She could feel people surrounding them but she couldn’t pull away. Her mouth wouldn’t stop opening like she was trying to gasp out something._

_“Sssh, it’s okay, you’re okay. Don’t talk it’ll make it worse. We’ll get you to the hospital and they’ll get you better.”_

_“S-sor-ry.”_

_She blinked back tears. “Don’t say that, there’s nothing you could ever be sorry for. You’re the one who’s done everything right through this. I told you, you’re the strong one.”_

_She gave an abated smile before her eyes hardened. “I-I-I knew. S-saw, n-not ov-ver, more.”_

_Sera stroked her sister’s hair. “It’s okay, we’ll keep fighting, it’ll be over, it will. You said so.”_

_Selene shook her head before the sad smile returned. “L-love you.”_

_“Stop.”_

_“W-i-i-ish Sapph was h-here.”_

_“He will be, he won’t leave your side after this, you’ll see. You’ll never have a moment’s peace now.”_

_“B-be g-good t-t-o each ot-her. S-s-tay safe. S-sound.”_

_“I said quit it. You’ll be fine, quit talking.”_

_Where the hell was Sapph? Where the hell was the ambulance? The cops? What the hell was happening?”_

_She felt something warm and wet clutch her wrist and seeing Selene’s hand she took one hand off the wound to hold it._

_“I’m h-e-re, al-ways, w-with you.”_

_Sera put her forehead on Selene’s, the eyes that reflected her own glazing over with a white film._

_“Please, please, I’ll do anything, just please stay.”_

Her body propelled forward, her brain, at last, letting her escape. She felt the dried trail of tears on her face, she felt Shep’s nose digging into her, his whimpers telling her he knew she was in pain.

“I’m okay, boy.”

She went to her bathroom to wash her face, the whites of her eyes a blistering red. Her face was puffy, and she continued to sniffle, pulling down the collar of her nightgown she saw the silvery outline of the bullet hole in the mirror. Letting the cloth go, she shrugged the fabric back into place, there was enough damage under there and she didn’t want to see anymore.

_She pushed me to save me. She knew. Selene knew._

No matter how many times she went over it in her mind she couldn’t figure out why she hadn’t said anything. There had been no signal beforehand, and that’s what dismantled her so much. Sera thought she could read her brother and sister so easily, their feelings and thoughts so in tune that it was near telepathic. But this blindsided her. And it hurt.

Going into the kitchen she grabbed herself some water before turning on the lamp by the side table, draping herself on the couch. Her body felt weighted like she had trudged hundreds of miles in waist-deep mud. But she wasn’t sure she wanted to close her eyes now, the fear of what her brain would conjure up for her to view. The clock said it was shy of four in the morning, too early to start the day up, especially for the weekend. So she laid her head back, feeling Shep jump up and lie between her legs. She didn’t even get the chance to doze when the phone started ringing behind her, groping her hand she blindly grabbed the receiver.

“Hello?”

“Hey.”

She immediately relaxed the familiar timbre of her brother’s voice setting her at ease.

“How are you?”

“Fine, ran into a few walls but they're down now.”

She chewed her lip. It was metaphoric, and she was imagining all the things those ‘walls’ could’ve been.

“Are you somewhere warm?”

She heard him sigh; he thought she was wheedling him, trying to find where he was so she could hunt him down.  

“I just want to know you’re safe, Sapph.”

“Not on the line!”

_No names._

“Sorry.”

“I’m fine, נומער צוויי.” **(Number two.)**

He was trying to joke, knowing she was tense, worried about him. Of course, he knew. But he also knew she hated being called that. Giving their birth order, he had dubbed her that when they were young.

_“You’re always going to be number two, Sera!”_

_“Shut up!”_

_Selene had pushed in between them, not wanting them to fight. “You’ll always be my number two, Sera.”_

_With that said her and Sapph couldn’t help but bust out in laughter, Selene looking at them in confusion._

“I hope so, I want you safe.”

“I know, I want you to be as well…how have you been?”

“Yeah, good, not spectacular, but doing better.”

“You’ve been there for a while now.”

“Yep.”

“Been watching the news for that region – a lot of murders, one found in the park less than fifty miles from you.”

“When was this?”

“A few hours ago, it’s on all over the news now.”

She flicked on her television, muting it so she could hear her brother. He was right, Pond Meadow, another body on the bank of the water.

“Might be time to move on from there, you know it’s them, or some fucks they’re associated with.”

“We don’t know that for certain.”

“And the fact that all the victims are women of the Jewish faith – that’s just a fucking coincidence?”

She tried her best to sound sure and knew she fell flat when she uttered. “Could be.”

“You’re full of shit and you know it. Why do you think I’m calling? You need to leave.”

She hesitated her words more than a breathy whisper. “But I don’t want to.”

“What d’you mean you don’t want to?”

Sera jumped from the couch, exasperated. “I’ve been here half a year! I’m finally getting settled. I’ve got a good job…I’m starting to make friends, talking to people again. I don’t want to just up and leave. Not anymore.”

“It’s not fucking safe for you there. If they’re in the same area they’re aware of you, hell they could have you pinned right now and this is just to fuck with you.”

It made her mad. He was right, they probably were. “If you feel like it’s that bad why don’t you come down here to help?”

She could picture her brother shaking his head on the other end. “You know what happened last time.”

“What? That I fought back? That I protected you? That’s what family’s supposed to do –“

“You almost fucking died! You think I could live if something happened to you? After Selene…”

Her chest quivered that hollow space that would belong to her sister, echoing in her rib cage.

“And like I told you, it’s the same for me. I can’t lose you. But I’m fucking tired of running, we’re twenty-three and we live like hermits. This isn’t living, this isn’t what Selene would’ve wanted, what mom or dad –“

“Don’t fucking mention dad.”

“Fine, but WE were supposed to find THEM, take them out remember? It doesn’t matter, they’ll come either way. I know I’ll have to leave soon, so no one gets hurt, I’m not that stupid that I’ve alluded myself to it. But I’m going to at least wait and see if anything happens. You’re welcome to come and stay with me if you change your mind.”

It was quiet on the other end.

“You hang up?”

“I’ll call you in a week, okay?”

She bit back the rejection. “You better, I love you, כאָטש איר ניטאָ אַ פאַרביסן מולע.” **(Though you’re a stubborn mule.)**

“I love you, too. Just be safe, please.”

With that, a click resounded letting her know the connection was dead.

She had been surprised when she woke to Shep’s barking. She hadn’t thought she’d go to back to sleep, but she was kind of glad she had, feeling more refreshed and less tightly wound.

“Give me a sec, Shep and we’ll go for your walk.”

Looking through the cabinets for the coffee grounds she noticed how dwindled down her groceries was.

“Going to have to go to the market today boy, need to get some more food for you too.”

She washed her face, the red dulled to a light pink, the rest of the traces gone from the nightmare. Throwing on some jeans and a warm sweater she pulled her hair back in a braided bun before gathering her bag, coat, and Shep. She knew that there was a farmer’s market close by that gathered on the weekend and it was a good opportunity to get in a walk while getting a bulk of what they needed. Maybe it’d help put off going to the store for another few days. The wind outside was frigid, but the sun was out and that was good. She should really see if they sold some kind of gloves while she was down there. She rubbed her hands together, hoping to get some warmth from the friction.

“We are not made for this kind of weather, Shep.”

“Maybe I can be of some assistance ta that.”

The abrupt introduction being so close in her space had startled her, her first reaction to rear back her arm and lash out as hard as she could. It took the person down, the hit going to his throat, she would’ve been proud if she hadn’t known the person though. Her eyes went wide as she knelt down.

“Murphy? What are you doing here? How’d you even –“

She heard laughter, Connor walking a tad more cautiously up to them.

“Ye got a mean hook there, love, took him down right quick.”

She turned back to Murphy, gently taking his hands away from his throat to see if there was any bruising. Shep had decided to absolve his owner's fault by licking Murphy’s face making him grunt in mild amusement.

“I am so sorry. I wasn’t paying too much attention and when you started talking right next to me I didn’t –“

“It’s alright, ‘m fine.”

Murphy sat up, still rubbing his throat, his face red from the assertion.

“Sure yer fine, brother, the girl got ye good. Don’t know what your dumbass was thinking runnin’ up like that though. Was like a pup, waggin’ his damn tail at findin’ ye. Couldn’t contain himself, what he gets, I suppose.”

She dug into her bag, pulling out the bottle of water she saved for Shepherd when they go on long walks. Opening it, she put it to his lips, letting him take it to sip.

“How did you guys find me?”

Connor rubbed the stubble on his cheek. “Was worried about ye, love, we were hopin’ ta see ye. But we hadn’t so we had a friend find ye.”

Her head jerked up to him. “A friend?”

“Oh, yeah, he’s good at that, so we told 'im you were an art teacher for a private school and he found it, and from there we asked where you resided and here we are.”

She looked down, feeling anxious that she was found so easily.

“I don’t…I mean it’s sweet. But I don’t understand why you two went through so much trouble.”

Murphy answered then. “Told ye, we were worried about you. Wanted ta make sure ye were alright. And we missed ye.”

She wanted to snort at that, meeting only once, how could they miss her? But casting her gaze up she saw, in her astonishment, that they were sincere.

“And after going through all that trouble, I have to say hello by hurting you. I am sorry about that, I would offer you some tea up in the apartment but our cupboards are kind of bare. That’s where Shep and I are headed now to get some supplies.”

She had given a timid touch to his throat, ashamed for hurting him, Murphy’s gloved hand settled over hers as he grinned at her.

“Care fer us to accompany ye? Don’t care much fer tea though, not sure if you noticed but we ain’t Brits.”

She grinned at him. “I did kind of notice, neither of you gave off a James Bond vibe.”

Her reply was a string of curses thrown to her in what she believed to be Latin.

She stood, breathless laughter tumbling out. She held her hand for Murphy to take and let her gaze turn to Connor, who was looking at her intensely.

“What’s the matter?”

He pointed to her hands. “Where’re your gloves at, love?”

She shrugged, thrusting her hands into her coat. “I need to pick up some, and a toboggan. When I arrived here, it was scorching, I didn’t really think of the weather changing.”

“Well, that won’t do, will it?”

She felt a hand clasp hers and turned to see Murphy smirking at her.

“Won’t do at all, brother. We were raised to be gentlemen, ye know?”

He tucked her hand under the cusp of his arm, and before she could respond Connor had bounded to her other side repeating the action.

“Aye, our ma would disown us ta know we didn’t help a lady in a time of need.”

“An artist to top it all.”

She felt her cheeks warm, letting them hold on to her as they continued to town.

“Quiet there, aren’tcha, Seraphine?”

It was a knee jerk reaction, very few people had ever said her name in its entirety, and she usually conserved that right to only those select people. But hearing it come from Connor, looking at her with such an amiable curiosity, she decided to bend that rule.

“I’m just still surprised, I guess. Don’t know why you would miss me.”

“Perhaps because ye made such a lasting impression on us, aingeal.” **(Angel)**

She blushed again at the endearment, the red going deeper when she felt Murphy’s breath on her face.

“Aye, it’s hard ta find people that understand the bond ye know? And we weren’t going to let such a pretty like ye be alone when we could be charmin’ you with our wit.”

She did snort then, and she knew without looking both men were grinning at her.

“Oh, she doubts us. But, no, ya are mighty sweet, love, and neither of us could let ye go. Wanted ta talk to ye again if we could.”

“Both of you can talk to me as long as you like. Told you I don’t do much, probably why I was thinking about you yesterday.”

“Wow, girl, ye know how ta shoot down a man’s ego. Supposed ta tell us ye couldn’t stop thinkin’ about how handsome we were or how allurin’ our charisma is. Not that we were at the bottom of the barrel.”

She ducked her head down. “Sorry, I didn’t really didn’t mean for it to sound like that. I do think you’re both incredibly sweet.”

They had both dug into their coats for their cigarettes, taking a puff and blowing it away from her.

“Believe me, love, we as sweet as candy.”

“I was goin’ ta say sugar, but ye go on ahead with that one, brother.”

Murphy nodded his head while taking another drag.

“So what do boys that's so sweet like to eat?”

They looked at her for a moment and she shrugged shyly. “I thought I could cook us lunch. I mean you did all that to find me and then had me attack you. Probably the least I could do.”

Murphy rubbed his throat in mock anguish. “Aye, ye could kiss it better if you wanted.”

Connor's eyes narrowed at his brother before pushing his shoulder with his free hand. “Beidh tú éirí as an tobac leis cac, scanradh an cailín amach le tú ag suirí diabhal.” **(Will you quit with that shit, scare the girl off with your damn flirting.)**

“Bhí sí ag tairiscint, ach theastaigh póg.” **(She was offering, just wanted a kiss.)**

They continued their argument, and though she didn’t mind it Sera put a stop to it by leaning to the side and letting her lips graze Murphy’s Adam’s apple.

His eyes turned kind when they went down to her. “Aww, love that feels much better now.”

Connor cleared his throat, rubbing it with his palm. “That ain’t fair, I’m hurtin’ here too, grá aingeal.” **(Angel love)**

“Ye didn’t get fuckin’ hit!”

Connor sneered at his brother. “It’s called sympathy pains if ye want ta look it up.”

She smiled, bashful, the nickname filling her heart. Leaning over to the other side, she kissed Connor’s throat as well, taking in the difference of scent to him.

“Aye, thank ye, love, me own brother would just let me suffer.”

“Nothin’ damn wrong with ye.”

“No point in fighting guys, I mean you’re both being kind enough to keep me from getting frostbitten. Had to show my appreciation somehow, though I don’t know what to think about being called an angel, seems a tad dishonest there.”

“But you’re our angel now.”

“Oh? How so?”

They both shrugged, Connor, answering with a coy smile. “Maybe we felt like we were missin’ someone too.”

* * *

**{Want to give my thanks to[Debbief722](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Debbief722/pseuds/Debbief722) your reviews have helped me continue, and to actually focus lol, I'm usually bouncing every damn where.}**


	5. Perchance to Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oooh, history and a book reference! Yay!

**One of Three**

**Chapter 5 – Perchance to Dream**

It was snowing, and Sera’s breath caught had as she watched from high in her apartment as it started to gather on the ground. Being from Florida, it could get cold in the winter, on a few occasions it would even flurry, during those times she would open her mouth to catch the icy bits on her tongue. But this was something else entirely, the world was turning white outside, a blanket erasing the chaos of the city and it was going to continue for the next few days. The city was used to this, already salting roads and sidewalks, the news telling people to be prepared to shovel their driveway and keep their vehicles out of the open unless they wanted to dig for it.

The schools have even bound ahead and canceled classes for Monday, anticipating lack of attendance for hindrance and, well, it was the first snow of the season. Sera was excited to play in it herself. She had always wanted to build a snowman, maybe make a snow angel, coming back in half frozen to drink hot cocoa. Better yet, hot cocoa mixed with coffee. She knew the weather was going to affect her though, the billowy winds shocking her as soon as she opened the outside doors proving that.

Going back to the living room, she thought the storm was a good metaphor for the last several weeks, a whirlwind. It felt her feel good that her life had taken such a turn. Sure she was still cautious and didn’t talk to many people. But she went out more with the people she did. She had gone out to eat a few more times with Janine, even going with her and Claudette, though the plans for that night had been orchestrated by Claudette and the three had ended up at a veteran’s hall playing bingo and sipping punch. But it had been fun, especially seeing the other girls flip out over winning a hula hoop and a pair of sunglasses. Among all that, things had been quiet, the killings taking a drop on the news. Not having to hear about another body washed up somewhere was a blessing she was grateful for.

Then there were the boys, who were much more persistent in getting her out of the apartment. They’d do everything from odds and ends like accompanying her to the market or taking a walk with her and Shep through the park. Sometimes they’d even surprise her by taking her to the movies or sitting on the edge of the wharf where the fishermen would pull in and dock. But usually they would come over and enjoy a meal with her, and just talk; all these things they would arrive unexpectedly, but she found herself liking that as well, the spontaneity. A few times dragging her out to go to the bar they frequented, a little Irish pub called McGinty’s. It was run by a sweet older man called Doc reminding her of the dwarf in Snow White with his glasses, figuring out immediately that he had a form of Tourette’s, she had slapped the boys when they had started messing with him about it.

“I stopped givin’ a –“

“Fuck!”

“When I saw ye layin’ on yer –“

“Ass!”

They thought it was hilarious and she gave a half crank blow to their heads leaving them stunned, while Doc had started cackling.

“It’s all right, lass, they do this ta me all de time. It’s all in fun, but I didn’t mind seein’ that.”

She had then been introduced to her first Guinness and their friend Rocco, the man who had helped find her.

“It’s not all that hard sweetheart, browse through some phone books and make a few calls, not as much work as these two make it seem. They’re both just too dimwitted and lazy to think of doing that on their own.”

The result of that had been handfuls of ice tossed and a headlock to the floor. It was nice, the beer and the events warming her from the inside, she enjoyed the carefree attitude around her. She knew the boys would be visiting her today; usually, they would call her if they were a bit too drained from work just to check in with her. But when they didn’t they would pop up at her door. She believed they did that in the beginning so she couldn’t leave, or pretend she wasn’t there. Which she could anyway, but now it had become a system and she was fine with it. Clicking on another pot of coffee, she decided to make some supper for when Connor and Murphy did decide to show up.

She had already known that they had many childlike quirks, but taking them to the market with her that day, it was worse than having a team of screaming three-year-olds with her. They would find something like a pack of a certain pastry or cookie they would want, both having chosen a different flavor would bicker over which one to get. Sera had pointed out that they were old enough to get both of them if they wanted and it would appease them until the next display of interest would come up and it would start all over. She could also tell they had a void of home cooked meals, greasy takeout being their main food of choice. And when she went through the produce section, she would ask what they would like, holding up different greens they would turn their noses at.

But like three-year-olds, it wasn’t hard to trick them into eating them, she would cover it with a sauce or cheese and though if they found some spinach not chopped up enough they nibble the edge before sticking the whole thing in their mouths. She smiled, it was adorable in a way. Looking through her fridge, with some of the leftovers she had she came up with making a decent pizza for them both. They’d, of course, would want more meat on theirs, so she measured out enough to make two. Artichoke hearts, olives, chicken, beef, arugula, peppers – she had plenty to top off with putting in the dough to cook for a little while she simmered some tomatoes on the stove, chopping everything else up as she waited.

She was far from being any type of gourmet, that trait had been given to her brother earnestly. But she had spent enough time in the kitchen when one of her parents were cooking, as well as two grandmothers that bled chicken broth so she knew a good amount of how to get by. She pulled the crusts out, layering them with the chunky sauce, piling on the various toppings, making sure one had more cheese and meat than the other. The smell of sauce and carbs had filled up the room, making her forget her coffee when a huge yawn raked through her.

Pouring a mug she put her face into it to breathe the aroma in. She hadn’t slept for about two days now. And with the grogginess from the gray clouds outside and the lack of sleep left her in a fatigued stupor. It was the nightmares, sometimes they would ebb off, letting her have nights of blank slumber, but for many nights now all that was put in her mind was Selene’s horror-filled eyes as blood ran down her throat, going back to her mom tied to a table, her slender body exposed and slashed to pieces, the last going to her dad, hands bound behind his back and strung high by his neck in the trees.

No, she didn’t want to relive any of that any more than she had to, so giving up one of her favorite pastimes, she did her best to stay awake. Her knuckles brushed her cheeks, an unconscious act, something her father did as he told her goodnight. Sapph put so much blame on him, and in the beginning, so had she. But, with time, the anger slowly dissolved trying to see from his perspective that her dad tried to do right at the end.

He had been a judge, a very prominent bench trial judge. Most people, who stood before him, were of various high crime organizations, more or less mobsters. She sucked on her teeth then, hearing some of his cases that he would go over during dinner would make Sera want to laugh, some of the terminology of it making her think of the 1920’s mafia.

_“So did they swim with the fishes, daddy?”_

But they were real, very real, and what her dad never mentioned during all those evening meals was the various chords of business that had been struck. For a price, a lot of evil would be allowed out of his court with merely a slap to the wrist. Until one day her dad decided to stop, making a loop and sending the crime boss to prison. Maybe the man wouldn’t meet her father’s price, though Sera would like to think the deeds he committed were heinous enough that her father couldn’t turn a blind eye to it. Either way, the man’s family wasn’t pleased with the outcome, thus sealing her and her family’s fate. A watered-down version of it anyways. Sera had seen hell during the last year and a half and did not want to feel those licks of flame again. Setting the timer for the pizzas, she curled on the couch with Shep, gathering a book and a glass of wine the boys had given to her, claiming it was much too girly for them. Their loss, she liked it, the alcohol not overtaking the fruity taste.

Letting herself take a few sips she tried to let herself get into the world of five sisters constrained in isolation and the events that would lead them to want to take their own lives. As the youngest jumped out the window, Sera had dropped the book as she fell asleep.

_“…Include us with them forever, and let us not be ashamed for we put our trust in You.”_

_Seven-year-old Selene whimpered faintly. “So does that mean if we do what’s right we’ll burn at the stake too?”_

_Sera could see her mother shaking her head at their father. “I don’t know why you tell the girls these things, they’re not Sapphire they can’t handle hearing that. It could scare them, give them nightmares.”_

_Sera blew her lips together in annoyance. “I’m not scared; don’t see the point is all.”_

_Her dad squared his shoulders then, flabbergasted. “The point? It’s your heritage young lady, that’s the point!”_

_“You keep saying to value our beliefs. But that one girl you talked about – Duque, she showed her beliefs, converted people, spread all that stuff about the Messiah coming, but she lied, He never did and she burned for it. So what was the point?”_

_Her father’s posture softened, pulling her on his lap. “The point, honeybee, is that despite all the horrible things going on around you, you have something to give you hope. No the Messiah didn’t come during her time, probably won’t come in ours but He will. And that’s something to hang onto.”_

_Sera still didn’t understand. “So are we going to burn or not?”_

_Her mother laughed. “Next time honey, why not stick to the Book of Esther for hope instead of going through religious martyrs.”_

_Selene clenched the side of her mouth, standing up. “Something’s burning, momma.”_

_Sera could smell it too, the scent of wood burning strong from the windows. Pulling the curtain back she fell down at seeing the flames engulfing them from the outside. She could then hear a loud banging from the door, but with the flames, it was impossible anyone could be out there. There was no way she’d open it anyway, knowing the flames would eat up the house in an instant, then she heard barking._

_“Shep?”_

_But Shep wasn’t with her then. But the barking got louder._

“Shep!”

Wrenching up, she saw Shep beside her, his paw clawing at her chest to wake her. She could still smell the smoke, the apartment itself hazing in a gray fog.

“I slept through the timer!”

Then came the knocking. God, someone probably thought she set the place on fire.

“Just a second!”

Running up to the oven, she shut it off, opening the oven door and buried in a plume of black. She coughed on the charred taste, seeing the remnants of the pizza on the trays.

“Open up the door, lass!”

She sighed, it was the boys, and the house was encased in a haze.

“Let me open the windows first!”

She wished she had a balcony now; the larger doors would help the place air out more quickly.

Running her fingers through her hair, she knew she was a mess, but they saw her like that more often than she would like. Opening the door, the two strode in past her.

“What happened?”

She shrugged. “I was trying out smoke signals, didn’t work out too well.”

They looked at her aghast.

“I was trying to make us something to eat, but I fell asleep.”

“Christ sake, love, there was smoke coming from under the door, and ye wouldn’t answer…”

She went to the little closet that doubled for linens and storage, she reached under the shelves for a box fan, only to be pushed aside as Murphy got it loose from the surrounding junk.

“Connor was about to kick the door in, was scared for ye.”

Connor scoffed from the kitchen and Sera saw him dumping the burnt food in the garbage.

“Wasn’t scared, worried, yeah, not scared though.”

“You were fuckin’ scared, so was I –“

The heat in Murphy’s words was going to lead to a fight, so she tried to deflect them. “I’m sorry guys, I need to replace the damn fire alarm, and I really shouldn’t have fallen asleep like that.”

Murphy plugged the fan in before turning back to her, his face not holding its usual playfulness but serious, maybe a first for him.

“You haven’t been sleeping have ye, Aingeal? I can see it in yer eyes, exhausted as hell ain'tcha?”

“I’m fine, I haven’t been sleeping as much as I should, but it’ll be okay. I’ll catch up when the holidays roll around.”

Connor came back to the living room, falling back on her couch. “Yur a shit liar, love, better stay away from poker.”

“I will, especially since I hear the Irish love to cheat on it.”

He sat up then, pointer finger wagging in mock anger. “The Irish don’t cheat at nothing, girl. Got luck on our side, don’t need to.”

“If you say so, MacManus.”

“I do, I also say you should get some rest, Murph’s right ye look like ye barely survived a plane crash.”

“Well, thank you, boys, I didn’t have time to put on an evening gown and get dolled up for you.”

Murphy laughed, shedding his pea coat before picking her up and tossing her on his shoulder.

“Now don’t be like that, want honesty don’tcha, besides Conn and me look like shit all the time.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it, now put me down.”

“No, love, gonna take ye a good rest.”

“Absolutely not, I got to scrounge something out for us to eat and make sure you two behave. I’m sure it’d look like closing time at McGinty’s if I left you two alone.”

Connor sat up and waved the cordless in her face, which was a little disorienting being upside down. “I know how ta use a phone, I’ll get us some food.”

She groaned, letting her head fall, which ended in the curve of Murphy’s back. “You’ll only get something artery clogging.”

“I’ll get veggies on the thing, don’t worry bout it.”

Murphy hitched her up, adjusting her weight. “Aye, let Connor worry about the food, I haven’t gotten ta see yer room yet. Could use a nap myself, that way ye have no need to think we’ll fight, and Connor will have ta pay fer the food.”

“Oh, no, there’s money in the bag Connor!”

Opening the door, Murphy dropped her on the bed. “He ain't gonna listen to that, told ye we’re gentlemen. Ladies aren’t meant ta pay. Now get comfortable.”

“I feel like I’m signing a death warrant with that line.”

He smirked. “I ain’t tryin’ nothing, not today. Like I said I wouldn’t mind catchin’ me some sleep as well. Been working double shifts the last three night and I can feel it.”

Sera grinned at him, watching him light a cigarette before tugging on his boots.

“Maybe you’re getting old, Murphy.”

“Aye, but that only means yer right behind me on that.”

“Hey! That’s not something a gentleman would say.”

“Sorry, love, perhaps I’m just selective in the acts of it.”

Standing up he kicked off the untied boots, tugging on his belt to throw on her dresser. Looking at his dingy shirt and jeans she realized they dressed alike. She wanted to laugh at the discovery, but they did. Boots, jeans, belt, both wore t-shirts though one would always wear a lighter color unless it was black, and their pea coats. Unbelievable.

“What’s that look on yer face, girl?”

“I just think it’s cute how alike you two are, you are but you’re not. If that makes sense…you’re both dressed alike…”

Murphy seemed to withdraw a little on that. It was something else she had come to notice in their differentiation, neither got serious too often, usually, they were both teasing and playful, but on some accounts, Murphy was much shyer, his brother’s exuberance pulling him from his shell.

“Is that bad?”

“Of course not, I didn’t mean it like that, Murphy, actually I was thinking how cute it was. I like how you’re both so comfortable with each other. It’s like water, you both move to the current together.”

His smile returned, along with a small bit of red in his face as he lay back on the bed. “Oh, this here is comfortable, Aingeal. Might not be sitting in your livin’ room any longer.”

She chuckled, getting up to go to the bathroom to change into some sleep pants. Coming back she saw Shep had gotten on the bed, lying between Murphy’s legs as he got his head scratched.

“Did you and yer sister ever dress alike?”

Her bottom lip jutted out in thought. “When we were babies, all the time, our mom dressed all three of us alike. But then, she was like – oh, they need to be individuals. So she started dressing us different. As we grew older, I was much more into what was comfortable, Selene not so much. She always wore a dress, always, and where I would be ready in ten minutes she’d take two hours to settle on which shoes to go with which purse.”

Lying beside him she looked over to see a small twinkle with his smile. “Ye like ta talk about her, don’tcha?”

“Yeah, I do. Keeps her here with me.”

He nodded, understanding, before putting his arm around her and pulling her to him. “So why can’t ye sleep, love?”

In a slow movement, she let her head lay on his chest, his heartbeat thudding in a comforting rhythm, she let herself take it in, his warmth, the way his breath tickled the top of her head, the languid way his arm was slung around her, but held on enough to be snug. Oh, she knew she’d fall asleep like this.

“Been having nightmares.”

“About yer sister?”

“About all of them.”

Sera didn’t have to look up to know he was confused. She sighed, sadness flooding in her as she let her face nuzzle into his chest. “They’re all gone Murphy, it’s only me and my brother left, and he’s gone too. He doesn’t even want to be around me.”

He was quiet a moment, his hand coming up to rub her back, his face burying itself in her hair.

“I’m so sorry, love, neither of us knew –“

“I – I didn’t really want you to. I didn’t want you to feel bad for me. But since you two are crazy enough to hang around you may as well know.”

He had questions, she knew, hell she would too. But he held it in, giving her the luxury to relax again.

“Did the big bad Murphy ever have nightmares?”

He still held her close, thumb stroking her shoulder. “Aye, used to have the same one when I was a kid.”

“You don’t have to but –“

She tried to look at him, feeling him shrug as his heart fluttered against her cheek. “Eh, wasn’t that big of a deal. Used to dream of being outside the cathedral back home, it’s one of those gothic churches ye see ‘em all over here as well. A lot of them have those damned gargoyles up there, peering at ye, judge ye. Ma used to say if we didn’t live by the grace of God they’d be the things to drag us to hell. Well, there the thing was staring down at me, ye could hear the stones cracking under its weight when it moved, when it swooped down I’d duck on the ground could smell fire coming from it that’s how close it got but it didn’t go fer me. Went fer Connor, took him away to punish me.”

Murphy used his free hand to wipe at his face remembering his childhood nightmare upsetting him. Sera patted his chest, leaning up and kissing him on his mole, his designated spot, and he smiled at her.

“I’m sorry, having your subconscious think that way…but it’d never happen to either of you. You’re both too good for that.”

“That so, Aingeal?”

“Let’s see – you’re both devout in your faith, kind to others, respect your mother, live modestly and charitably. If that’s not a key to the gates, don’t know what could be.”

His smile grew, taking her hand and bringing it palm up to kiss.

“What’s all this now, I get us food and you two go behind my back and get all cozy.”

“Aww, shove it, Conn, the lass and I were having a discussion.”

“Oh, and what about then?”

Rolling over to face Connor, she saw him parroting Murphy from before, stripping his belt and shoes as he came to the bed. She smirked at him.

“Different things, how long do we have before the food gets here?”

“Due to the snow, they said it could be over an hour.”

“How about we nap then when the food gets here if you’re really curious about our discussion we’ll talk about it with food.”

Connor flopped on the bed on the other side of her. “Sounds like a plan to me, love. This bed is fuckin’ comfy.”

She giggled one more time, she looked back and saw Connor snuggled down in the pillows, armed draped around his head. Before leaning back to Murphy, whose eyes were already closed, his breathing starting to even out. Maybe with the two of them surrounding her, they could protect from her dreams.

She was woken again by barking and knocking, the dreamy stupor. She was so warm though, that was when she woke fully, two bodies up against her, though she calmed remembering who. Both Murphy and Connor’s faces were pushed in her hair, though Connor’s was pushed against her scalp, their hands were situated in a way not to touch each other only her, zigzagging a path along her waist. With one pushed into her front and the other into her back, she was in a nice cocoon, it would be easy to go to sleep again. But the knocking was there, and Shep’s barks were getting restless. Relenting to getting up, she eases her way out of their embrace, the action near to effortless due to countless slumber parties and nights ended up sharing a bed with Selene.

Going to the door, she apologized to the poor delivery boy giving him a larger tip than necessary to make up for his time. The pizza did smell good, and she wondered if she should wake the boys while it was still fresh. Taking down some plates she got the table ready, turning to go to her room she found she’d only have to wake one. Connor emerging while running his hand through his messy dark blonde hair.

He gave a loud yawn. “Food finally here, love?”

“Yep, just set the table about to wake you.”

His smile was gentle. “Used yer money too didn’t ye?”

“I did, it’s the 90’s Mr. MacManus.”

“Well, aware there, Aingeal, ain’t no rule that says I can’t take care of ye every now and then.”

She focused on the table, blushing. “You two take care of me more than you know. It won’t hurt to let me care for you.”

She jumped feeling a hand on her hip. “Ye do take care of us lass, ye give us something to look forward ta every day. That’s something we don’t take for granted.”

Her eyes grew when Connor’s hand rested on her face. She couldn’t identify the look in his eyes, the closest thing she could get to was affectionate.

“I look forward to you both too.”

She gulped as she was pulled closer. “Ye have no idea how glad I am ta hear that, grá Aingeal. Cause me and Murph both hope to stick around fer as long as you’ll have us.”

“That could be a long time, you both may be sick of me by then.”

A chuckle rumbled through his chest, his face drawing closer to hers. “Don’t be countin’ on that.”

She closed her eyes, waiting to see what he’d do when a voice stopped him.

“Where the fuck did everyone go?”


	6. Blood of the Lamb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if some think this chapter is a lil preachy, but anyone seeing the film knows how devout the boys are.

**One of Three**  
**Chapter 6 – Blood of the Lamb**

"Look at this one! What were yer parents doin'?  Letting ye sunbathe?"

Exasperated, Sera rinsed off the last dish, putting it in the drainer as she leaned over the table to look at the picture in question. It was her, around age six, beaming at the camera during one of the times they spent at her grandparents' house on the lake and yes, she was pretty much naked except for the frilly swim bottoms she wore.

"We were building sandcastles, okay, why are you interested in looking through all of these anyways?"

She had taken a nap before the boys had arrived, and with her giving them a key not too long ago, had let themselves in. With her asleep it seemed to be an invitation to rummage through her things, finding the photo albums. She hadn't seen the harm in it at first, actually enjoying flipping the pages with in the beginning but being the third album in she wanted to yank the binder from them.

"Ye were just so adorable lass, still are, but ye had those chipmunk cheeks back then."

Murphy puffed his own out to demonstrate, earning a halfhearted slap to the shoulder.

"One of these days I'll go through your things and find some embarrassing pictures of you."

Connor piped in then, chin propped in a cocky manner on his hand. "'Fraid not, you'd have ta go ta Ireland fer that, our Ma's the only one with all our family pictures."

She shrugged. "I wouldn't mind a trip there. I've thought about going recently."

"If ye think they grow 'em like us you'd be wrong love."

"No, Mr. Arrogance, I was being weird and had other reasons."

Murphy's interest was taken away from the pictures upon hearing that. "And what weird reasons were they?"

She clammed up then. She wasn't sure why she had mentioned it. It had been a struggle for her after Selene died, and she had gotten cryptic, pragmatic, looking into everything macabre. She chose to busy herself with fixing them some coffee, decaf, or she would never get to sleep later on. Getting the cups down from the shelf she started to put in some sugar when a large hand stilled her smaller one. Seeing the ink of AÉQUITAS, she didn't need to look up to know whose hand it was. Her eyes remained glued to it, 'Justice,' she wasn't sure that concept was even real anymore.

"Aingeal? Seraphine?"

She shook her head, putting on a smile. "It's silly. It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters, means something ta you. Come on, Conn and me are from there, we can give ye the goods on it."

"Neither of you will laugh?"

They looked to one another before back at her. "Course not, love."

"I wanted to go to Doolin –"

Murphy thumbed his lips before interrupting. "Doolin? Ain't nothing down there, tourist trap s'all it is."

Connor hissed from the table in German. "Hast du deine Zunge eine verdammte Sekunde und lass sie sprechen?" (Will you hold your tongue a fucking second and let her speak?)

Murphy gave his twin a disgruntled look but kept silent turning back to her.

"Like I said it's silly."

"Ignore him, ár milis, he shoots off his gun before it's cocked. Come on and tell us." (Our sweet)

She did and in a single breath. "I was reading up on the Celts and during Halloween, they have something called the 'between years,' and the people of Doolin reported more experiences with it than anywhere else. But basically, the Celts thought the different planes of existence became thin and I just –"

Yeah, she sounded crazy.

She felt a hand on her shoulder, knowing it was Connor this time. "Ye mean the time when the dead could come back for the night? Ye wanted to talk to yer family there?"

She flexed a hand on the counter, nodding sadly. "I know it sounds insane."

Murphy came closer then. "No, it doesn't. If ye want ta go ta Ireland we'd be happy ta go along with you. But ye know that you can talk ta them anytime, don'tcha? God'll let them hear ye."

She swiped at her face, knowing her eyes were welling. She peeked on each side of her, seeing the beads that they always wore.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not like you two. Not anymore, haven't been on speaking terms with God lately."

"Understandable. He's there though when yer ready."

Murphy's eyebrows shot up. "She could go with us to Mass this Sunday."

Her heart clenched. It was a sweet, them being pious yet to include her in their beliefs – it was touching. But…

"I really appreciate the thought, but don't think I'm allowed to guys."

Connor's arm went around her shoulders. "And why is that love?"

She stared above them towards the ceiling. "Well…I don't know your rules about it, but I doubt I'm really allowed to go in there, and if I were to go by what I was taught the Avodah would stop me, but since –"

Murphy held a hand up. "The hell ye talkin' about, Sera?"

She shrugged meekly. "I'm Jewish guys."

Connor jerked his arm away as if it caught fire holding his hand to his chest and staggered backward before falling to the floor.

Her nose crinkled in annoyance. "Oh, you're so funny, I don't know the Catholics' stance on these things, and just because I'm not as familiar with God as I once was doesn't mean I forgot what I was taught."

Connor jumped up from the floor moving towards her, Sera dodging his arm as she took her coffee to the living room. Murphy made sure to give her some distance and sat at the other end of the couch.

"He was only joking around, Sera, we kind of already knew ya were of the Jewish faith."

Her brow arched. "How?"

Murphy shrugged looking at Connor who took the recliner. "Well, there's yer last name, the fact that ye get that pained look on yer face if a pig's mentioned, and we found those little candlesticks in one of yer boxes."

"It's called a menorah, and you two need to quit rambling through my things."

"Can't help but be curious, lass, it's in our nature."

"How would you feel if I went through your things?"

The twins gave each other a glance before laughing, Murphy, getting bolder scooted closer.

"You can go right ahead on that, but I'm afraid all our possessions are direct in the open so there's no mystery to us, croí milis."  **(Sweetheart)**

Connor let his elbows lean on his knees, letting his body bend towards her. "We ain't meaning nothing by all this, love, we respect yer faith, not trying to convert ye or anything of the like. We just wanted to spend more time with you. Let ye see what we do, our inner workings and all that."

She mulled that over, chewing the inside of her cheek. She knew they hadn't meant anything by it, turning to Murphy her hands reached out to pull the beads out from underneath his shirt, letting her fingers skim along the smooth wooden surface of the cross.

"And you still want to be friends with me, even if I don't believe in this? I know it's a big part of you both, I don't want to mess that up."

"Yer not messing anything up! We've known before now, didn't we? Didn't change anything. It doesn't matter, Seraphine, we're just us, all right?"

She nodded at Connor, feeling Murphy's hands settle over hers as they still played with his rosary.

"Besides, Aingeal, I thought we were past being friends by now."

She eyed him, curious by his meaning, before a wide grin broke on her face, and started mimicking their accents.

"Aye, suppose we are best friends by now, we are."

Both their mouths dropped open, causing her to giggle uncontrollably.

"Ye hearing this, Murph, she's making fun of us there."

"Aye, can't let her –"

"Oh, aye!"

Murphy pinned her to the couch at the interruption, beginning to tickle her, Connor grabbing a pillow and pouncing on her with it. They were interrupted when Shep started barking at them, his teeth baring dangerously. Sera sat up quick, getting between her dog and the boys.

"Oh, no, boy, they're not trying to hurt me. Be good, and sit down now. There you go, good boy. Connor and Murphy are good, they're our friends, you know that."

She stroked his fur, letting his muscles loosen from the prepared fight.

"Sorry about that, love."

"It's not a big deal, I mean, it is…but I wouldn't let him hurt you guys."

Connor held his hand out, the ginger manner calming Shepherd enough to lick the finger. "Very protective of ye, yeah, that's a good pup. Gotta take care of our girl, we'll protect her too, help ye out there boy."

Her eyes went to linger on the floor, the words touching her more than they should. The tension in her was broken by Murphy's yawn.

"Gettin' late, isn't it?"

She crossed her arms. "Yeah, it is. I guess you boys will be headed home."

Connor nodded, picking up his and his brother's coat. "I suppose so unless ye wanted ta have another impromptu sleepover with us, love."

Her cheeks flushed in surprise, remembering that night. "You both want to stay?"

Murphy stretched his arms, getting up from his spot. "Wouldn't mind it, best night sleep I had in a very long time, Aingeal."

"Aye, gotta agree with Murph on that one."

She smiled. "I would like that, but you two don't have anything to wear in the morning."

They both started laughing.

"What's wrong with what we got on?"

"You wore it all day today, isn't that a reason?"

"Ah, love, real men don't worry about things like that."

But that sounded kind of gross to her. She looked back to see if Murphy agreed with that but he was already gone. "He's already taking up his spot on the bed."

"He must be really tired, I'm sure you both are with what you do."

"S'not too bad, love, honest work, get free cuts of meat sometimes, been meaning ta bring some to ye. Shall we get to bed?"

"Would you want me to wash your pants and shirts for the morning?"

"No, told ya, no need to worry about that."

She let him steer her towards the bedroom, sighing as they did. "Some of the things men do."

She got her pajamas making her way to the door, hearing Connor behind her.

"Not like we'll wear the same underwear tomorrow."

"What, you got spare ones in your coat?"

Murphy leaned up from the pillow. "Course not, just won't wear none."

She was glad they couldn't see her blush.

She was sleeping so well, her mind a blank sheet until a ringing roused her. Ringing? She blinked, trying to comprehend the sound. It's not the doorbell, so it must be – the phone. Shit, it was probably Sapph, and after not hearing from him the past few weeks she'd become livid to get some news from him.

Twisting herself from the limbs that circled her she dropped off the bottom of the bed to get to the phone.

"Hello?"

"What took you so damn long to answer?"

She sat on the couch relieved to hear his voice, no matter how irritated he sounded.

"I was sleeping for once."

"Oh."

"I know, surprising isn't it?"

There was a pause on his end. "You sound different."

Her lips parted in thought. "How so?"

"You seem cheerful, happy."

She thought on the past few months and smiled. "I guess I am, kind of weird, might take me some time to readjust to the feeling. You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Any more walls?"

"None lately, which is good."

Suddenly a female voice could be heard on the other line, Sera couldn't hear but the pitch in the woman's voice let her know she had been more than familiar with her brother.

"You sure you haven't been against a wall?"

"Oh, fuck off."

She could hear the mirth in his voice.

"I've missed this."

The drop in him hurt her. "Me too, I miss you."

"I think it'll be over soon. From what I can tell it's been like working up a damn ladder and I'm about at the top."

"If you need me –"

"No."

"I don't want you hurt, please, I'd like for us to make somewhere home again. Together."

"And we will but I have –"

Shouting from her room blurred out what Sapph was going to say.

"The fuck ye touchin' me fer?"

"I wasn't trying to touch ye, you ass! I was tryin' to get comfortable."

"Well, ye can keep yer hands off me, ye prick, copin' a feel on yer own damn brother. Ma would roll over on that if she found out."

She could help the small laugh erupting from her.

"Who the hell is that?"

The anger let her know her brother heard them as well.

"They're my friends, calm down."

"Friends? As in more than one? The fuck you got two guys over this late at night for?"

"We're having a sleepover."

She heard a scoff from the doorway, seeing two pairs of sleepy blue eyes pinning her.

"A sleepover? Are you kidding me right now?"

Murphy drifted over to the chair, digging his cigarettes out of his coat pocket.

"Who's bothering ye this late at night, love?"

Sapph voice raised an octave. "Love, huh? Why the hell's his voice like that?"

"They're Irish."

"Fucking Irish?"

There was another pause. "Are they fucking Catholics, too?"

"Oh, so the girl does have some taste! Was starting to worry about that since you've been hanging out with these two."

The twins' rebuttal was two punches in the arm for Rocco, who laughed as he gulped down his beer. She thought of Claudette then. Rocco wasn't single but like her was in a bad relationship. Yeah, they were very different, but different could be good, right? She wasn't going to mention the idea until talking to the guys to see what they thought. But she thought it might work for both of them. Like peanut butter and jelly.

She went to Doc to grab another beer, when she felt Connor stop her. "Already had yer two didn'tcha, aingeal?"

"Are you cutting me off, Mr. MacManus?"

"I think so, love, got ye nice and bubbly, no need ta make it worse tonight."

"It's still early."

"Aye, but ye have work in the morning, now don'tcha?"

She poked a finger in his chest, a little distracted by the lack of yield it had. She was more than tipsy. He grabbed her hand, fingers brushing over the top. She had to push back a flush that rose in her chest from the contact.

"How about I walk ye home?"

"What about Murphy?"

"He's fine, look at him!"

He was, laughing with Rocco, slamming his pint on the bar before beginning his own story – hands flying about with abandon.

"Yeah, I guess I should go home while I'm still capable of walking."

"Right ye are love, gotta know yer limits."

"Hey, I'm trying to let you be right and be responsible here."

"A good choice ye made on that too, here I got yer coat."

Walking became more of a chore than she thought it'd be, tipping over and stumbling into Connor every few feet. At the first intersection, he decided to wrap his arm around her to steady her. She put her hand on his.

"How are you always warm?"

"It's the Irish in our blood lass, boils us."

"Lucky this time of year, it's supposed to snow again."

"Will a lot before the year is up, it'll be a white Christmas or Hanukkah fer you. Ye gonna let me and Murph light a little candle?"

She laughed. "I didn't really think about it this year, I don't know if I'll get it out or not."

"Ye should. S'pposed to symbolize their oil wasn't it? That it lasted that many days but only had so much?"

She was caught by surprise. "Yes, the basics of it. How'd you know?"

"Was curious, asked about it? We could do both together if ye wanted."

She was used to Murphy getting nervous every now and again, but to see Connor looking at her fear and doubt in him she wrapped her arm around his middle.

"I'd like that. I was going to get you guys something anyways. Maybe I'll make latkes, you Irish like potatoes right?"

He grinned. "Love 'em, might want something sweeter with that though."

"I'll think of something."

They approached her building, and Sera let herself lean up against it.

"Well, here ye are love."

She stopped then, the two always walked her to her door, and the finality in his voice perplexed her. "Aren't you –"

She felt his hand on her neck, then a chilled pair of lips on her own frozen ones, both sets heating instantly. Every breath she had in her whooshed out at the touch and she let herself fall into him. She caught his bottom lip between her own, Connor began to hum, the vibrations tickling her and making her gasp giving the perfect opportunity for him to slip his tongue inside. Her head was reeling but she was able to make sense enough to pull back, and if Connor hadn't had her she would've fallen to the sidewalk.

"We can't –"

The sharp pain in his eyes hurt her, it was as if she kicked a puppy. "Why not, love, I thought we –"

"I do, very much so but…I think I have the same feeling for Murphy. I’ve come to care about you both a great deal, and I can't choose one and put a rift up between you two. I can't do that to you, you two belong by each other's side. You both mean too much to me to do that."

Connor rubbed his neck, a smile playing on his face that she didn’t see.

"Please don't be angry."

He looked a bit aghast on that. "Not mad, Aingeal, happy actually. Murph will be too."

"I don't understand."

"Murph and I are close."

She snorted, sarcasm spilling. "I had never guessed that."

Connor’s eyes crinkled as a laugh bubbled through him "Yes, ye have, and we know with yer own siblings ye understand that a look or a touch can be all it takes to communicate with each other. That ye know the closeness of sharing the same womb with someone is more than just a simple friendship. I do everything with me brother, talk about everything, experience everything…share everything."

She did understand, that close intimacy between her and her brother and sister; the wonderful connection at being fully understood without having to utter a single syllable, and also knowing the ridicule that could go behind it there had been plenty of fights with Sapph's girlfriends about that. Always pissed off that they were rejected on one occasion or another so he could spend time with her and Selene; Rumors would start, and though it hurt her, it hurt more to see her sister's eyes go wide at the accusations that would fly about, the sting from her friends whispering about her. Sera got even with them, especially that one haughty bitch that kicked him in the nuts. She could hardly imagine how it was for Connor and Murphy and their closeness, the words whispered about them. But what Connor said.

Her gaze went to his. "Share?"

"Aye, love."

"You want to share me?"

He shrugged timidly, like a little boy afraid of getting in trouble.

"You both actually want that?"

"S'not just us, it's about what you want too, Aingeal."

She could see the anxiety still on Conner's face. Did she want to be with two men? Two men that made her laugh, were kind and chivalrous, that had made her dreary world much brighter since finding them? There wasn’t really a doubt there. But, God, she wasn’t a prude, but she wasn’t too experienced in dating anyway and with two…

"I – I think I’d like to try…But can’t really picture how exactly how it would work.”

"We'd figure it out."

"Have you and Murphy been in this kind of relationship before?"

His eyes didn't move from hers for a long time before he sighed and dropped them to the pavement.

"Not the kind we want with you. A few one-night things, sure, but nothing with any meaning to it. A little story to it, love, this isn't something we thought about on a whim, Murph and me, we decided when we were still boys that we wanted someone to care for us the same, someone who'd understand us the same, who'd love us the same. Seemed ta fit that it'd be just one person, and after spending so much time together it was easy ta picture that it could be you."

Her heart caught in her throat.  Her hand going out to touch the scruff on his cheek "And you've never found someone who could do that before me? I kind of want to ask how dense the girls you talk to are."

Connor laughed, and Sera was glad the crinkled corners were back. "I s'ppose they are, there have been a few occasions where we thought we found someone. Many a time it turns out they thought they were getting us to backstab the other, having their fun and all that."

"I'm sorry that happened to you guys. I know you both like your jokes but playing with someone’s feelings is never funny."

"That’s sweet of ye, Sera. But I’m rather glad of it, if we never saw them fer what they were we could be stuck with them right now. God lets these things happen fer a reason. And I think those reasons led up to you."

She flushed. "I still don't understand why you'd both want me."

He came closer then, letting his arms cage her in, his palms lying on the building.

"Already told ye, Aingeal stór, ye understand us, and we understand you. And ye being funny, smart, artistic, patient enough to put up with us, and beautiful as hell is a topper." (Darling angel)

His hand on her cheek made her eyes go back to his, and with her breath hitching, she leaned forward to brush her lips across his. The sound he made caused a shiver to go through her.

"That a yes?"

She smiled the shyness still evident. "That's a let's sleep and if you don’t come to your senses we'll all talk about it more after work tomorrow."

Connor's thumb caressed her chin. "There ain’t goin’ ta be any mind changes on our part, it’s all up to you. I will give ye some space ta ponder on it. Wouldn’t be right fer me ta accompany ye anyways. ‘Fraid if I went up with ye, neither of us would be able to sleep tonight. Ye got me wired tonight, girl, been waiting to kiss ye fer a while now, and having to wait fer yer answer now. I'd be sure to keep ye up."

She blushed, kind of hoping to be kept up for different reasons.

"So, does that mean I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Oh, you can bet on that, lass, Murph and I will meet ye as soon as we clock out."

Their foreheads touched, his nose gliding down the bridge of hers before his lips touched hers one last time.

"We'll see you tomorrow, Aingeal."

"I'll be waiting."

Her heart was pounding, happiness in her veins that even the elevator being broken didn't bother her. She was able to march the stairs, oblivious to everything until she entered her floor. She didn't notice anything at first but the smell. It was tangy, rusty, like licking on a coin or one of those batteries that would shock her tongue, then Shep moved forward tugging her to the other side of the hall seeing the apartment adjacent from hers was cracked open. Shep whined.

"Hello? Your door is open!"

Battling with herself she let her fingertips push the door the rest of the way, the home dark inside. The tenant had probably been in such a rush they had left it open. Perhaps they had, had a family emergency. Shep nudged her forward brushing past her.

"Shep!"

Moving aimlessly through the dark home she continued to call for her dog, God, she could get arrested because of him. She saw his outline in the kitchen.

"Shep, come on boy."

He continued to whine, unmoving from his spot. She could hear a gurgling then, and against her better judgement she came further in, letting her hand reach for the light switch to find the source of the sound. The light hurt her eyes at first and she blinked to see, coming with a lot of red. The floor was covered in blood, leading to a thick, sticky puddle under a chair, a woman tied to it, her throat sliced open so badly it looked like her head could be flipped off her body like a Pez dispenser. The woman's eyes were bulging, the gurgling coming through the gag that was left in her mouth. The poor soul had survived - the rise and fall of her chest erratic as though she was trying to catch her breath. As if the attacker were still here and she was hyperventilating.

Suddenly, Sera was smelling chlorine, a swimming pool, and she tried to inch back to the door. Her fingers started twitching, the onset of fear, it wasn't good, this couldn't happen now. She had to get inside her apartment. Her throat was closing, her mouth dry, the twitching in her hands getting worse. Her legs locked, buckling right outside the bloodied woman's home as Shep ran behind her to break her fall. Her heart was palpitating. The button he was trained to push wasn't here it was inside her own apartment. And she wasn't able to use her cell, her eyes began blinking rapidly.

_Shit, why she spasming like that?_

_Like a death rattle, don't worry about it._

But it only felt like dying, having no control over what was happening to her, she was able to roll over before the rest of her body went completely rigid. Gurgling escaping her own throat as she drooled out the excess saliva collecting in her mouth.

_You sure she's dead?_

_Yeah, look how still she is._

_That's unfortunate, was hoping to have a little fun with them before we finished them off._

Not dead, only lucky then. The seizure saving her life. Her eyes looked up seeing red splattered along the tops of the rest of the doors. Her mind went to her dad reading to them.

_And the blood shall be to you for a token upon the houses where ye are: and when I see the blood, I will pass over you, and the plague shall not be upon you to destroy you when I smite the land of Egypt._

And before she lost consciousness she was able to see that no blood had been painted over the dying woman's door.


	7. Courses of Waiting Miracles

**One of Three**  
**Chapter 7 - The Course of Waiting Miracles**

_Sera came to with Shep licking her face and whimpering, bringing to attention that she felt as if she had been stampeded by buffalo. She felt heavy, like she couldn’t support her weight, that the air was made of bricks, but seeing her sister laying so still across the room she lifted herself up and crawled over to her._

_She whispered to her, shaking her shoulder. “Selene, Selene, are you okay, did they hurt you?”_

_Her sister’s head slowly turned her eyes so wide with fear. “Are they gone?”_

_“I don’t know.”_

_“When I saw you collapse, I wanted to help, but I thought if I fainted they’d leave us both alone. I’m sorry, Sera.”_

_Sera rubbed her sister’s back. “Don’t be sorry, you did well. But we have to move now, remember the hollow space behind inside the closet?”_

_“Where we used to hide when we were little?”_

_“Yeah, I want you to hide there; don’t make a sound until I come to you.”_

_Selene was shaking her head, sitting up and grabbing for Sera. “We can’t separate, if they’re still here, what if they…”_

_“I know, but I know one of the places dad kept a gun. Hopefully the lines aren’t dead and we can call the police. But we need something to protect us until they get here.”_

_Tears glistened in Selene’s eyes. “Oh, God, daddy.”_

_“We can’t do that right now, okay, I’m sad too, but we have to find Sapph and mom then get out of here. We have to be strong; we have to be smarter than them. Then we can grieve.”_

_“I don’t know if I can.”_

_“Yes, you can, you have to. Now come on.”_

_Checking out the doorway the hall seemed vacant letting the girls make their way upstairs. Going inside the hall closet, Sera helped remove the false paneling that revealed the tiny space._

_“I want you to hide in here. I’d leave Shep with you but I’m afraid his growling will attract someone. Here.”_

_Getting out her tiny pocket knife she handed it to Selene. “One of them actually finds their way in here, you stab until you can’t anymore, you understand?”_

_Selene looked sad but nodded. “Yes.”_

_“Good, I’ll be back as soon as I can.”_

_Selene’s hand darted out at the last second, gripping Sera’s. “Be careful.”_

_Sera tried to smile. “I’ll do my best.”_

Sera woke up on overly starched sheets, hearing beeping coming from beside her.

“Oh, good, you’re awake. I’ll get the doctor for you.”

She jumped at the voice, blinking open her eyes as the beeping sped up to the rhythm of her heart.

She was in a hospital, something she should have guessed by the smell alone.

“Good to see you’re up, Miss Shafir.”

She licked her lips. “How do you know my name?”

The doctor took the chart, skimming its pages before smiling at her. “The EMT’s found your identification inside your wallet. I’m sure you know what you experienced was a grand mal seizure, brought on by the stress of your fear from the situation you were in, but seeing that you’re able to talk and your body is functioning as it should it seems there haven’t been any repercussions. You’re very lucky you made it to your side, if you had kept to your back the accumulation of saliva could’ve choked you.”

She already knew that, it was the reason she had commanded her body to do so before losing control. “Where’s my dog?”

“Don’t worry he’s in safe hands. He’s at the shelter marked and ready for you to pick up.”

“So can I leave?”

The doctor continued to smile, egging her nerves. “The authorities will come in to ask you some questions after you eat and get your vitals checked. We had to sedate you to ease your symptoms. It may help you if you were again before you left; you’ve been through quite an ordeal.”

“I’d rather have a level head when I leave. I’m guessing I’m prohibited from driving so I’d rather be aware when I’m in a cab.”

The doctor’s tapped his pen on the clipboard. “You’re right, Miss Shafir, you shouldn’t be behind the wheel for at least a week, let your body settle, but under cases like this we’ll need someone to pick you up and sign you out.”

“What?”

“I’m afraid you’ll need someone to escort out, it’s the hospital’s policy. It’s to ensure your safety.”

“Well, what if I don’t have anyone to call?”

He smiled again and she wanted to hit him. “Then you’ll be allowed to stay overnight until you’re well enough to leave tomorrow.”

She wasn’t staying here, and she wasn’t leaving Shep in a dingy cage. “I’ll figure out someone to call.”

“Great. The nurse will be in shortly, make sure to eat to refuel yourself.”

She kept her mouth shut, beyond irritated. There had been a murder in her apartment building, she had seen the woman’s life draining from her, and she did nothing to help. Having that fucker come in acting like she had done something amazing by rolling over irked her tremendously, and now she had the police to deal with. She choked down her tiny box of cornflakes, letting the sour orange juice rinse it down while the nurse checked her blood pressure and pulse.

“Now just let me look at your eyes and we’ll be done.”

The nurse was just as jolly as the doctor, and she wondered when hospitals were taken over by pod people. The brightness of the penlight made her shrink back on the bed as her lids were propped open by the nurse’s gloved fingers.

“Your pupils are still dilated but that’s normal under stressful events.”

“You people make it sound like I flunked a test instead seeing a woman fighting for her life…is it…is it possible she made it?”

The nurse’s chirpy demeanor faltered then, giving Sera brief satisfaction. “I’m afraid I can’t tell you that, ma’am.”

Sera sat up straighter on the bed. “Can you tell me if it would’ve made a difference if I’d been able to call the police instead of spazzing on the floor? Or if I’d stayed to help with the bleeding?”

The nurse patted her hand. “There’s nothing you could have done to change things, don’t let yourself feel guilty. None of it was your doing, and you’re here, alive, focus on that.”

With that the nurse left, leaving Sera hating herself even more. Yep, once again here she was, alive, someone else dying in her stead. Maybe she should be grateful, maybe she should thank God for looking out for her. But she didn’t, she wanted to curse Him. Why keep choosing her life over someone else’s? Someone who probably deserved to live more than her? It never made sense. She wasn’t devout, she tried to be a good person but she didn’t do as much in the world as she should, she had broken the commandments, some to survive, but did it matter? If God was the one keeping her here couldn’t He have chosen someone more worthy?

“Miss Shafir? Are we disturbing you?”

An older man, with shaggy graying hair peeked through her door.

“Are you here to ask me questions?”

“Yes, ma’am, me and my partner here, we’ll try to make it as brief as we can, we know you’ve been through a lot.”

“Thank you.”

The other man was younger, short brown hair spiked up. “I’m Detective Greenly and this is Detective Dolly.”

“Nice to meet you both.”

They gave her sympathetic smiles, pulling up the chairs that were in her room.

“You reside in the complex there?”

“Yes, my apartment is diagonal from –“

Her lip trembled. “I don’t even know her name.”

“Mrs. Tovia, it’s okay, take deep breaths, we’re not here to upset you. We just want to get some answers.”

“I know. Yeah, I’ve there the past eight months, never did more than wave to her on passing each other.”

“May we ask what made you go into her apartment?”

She nodded. “My dog, the door there was open, and he started whimpering at it. I called in to tell them, but everything was dark, I thought she might have left in a hurry to get somewhere. I was going to leave, but Shep, sorry my dog, he got loose from me and went in.”

They both nodded both taking notes. “And you went in after that?”

“Yes, sir. He wasn’t coming when he was called, and I just wanted to get him and get home to sleep.”

“Understandable, what happened when you entered the apartment, were there any discerning noises, anything unusual?”

“When I found him, I heard a gurgling sound. I didn’t know what it could be, and for some reason, probably because I’m an idiot, decided to turn the light on to see.”

Dolly patted her knee. “You’re not. An idiot I mean, it’s human nature to be curious. Now what I’m going to ask may be uncomfortable but can you tell me what you saw when the light came on?”

Her hand trembled as she let her thumb brush her chin. “Red, there was so much red. Then I saw that it was coming from the woman, Mrs. Tovia, she was tied up to a chair, her throat…”

Her hand clasped her own, Greenly leaning forward. “It’s okay, Miss Shafir, we’ll skip that, what did you do after?”

“I knew when the twitching and the way I was breathing I was starting to have a seizure so I left to get to the phone in my house, but I didn’t make it. I should’ve done something.”

The men looked at one another. “Ma’am there was nothing you could’ve done.”

“Yes there is! She died alone! I could’ve held her hand, called the police, something.”

“It’s a tragedy, it is, but what happened, you couldn’t have changed it. It was decided whether or not you did anything.”

Tears were running down her face now, and she turned away from them.

“We only have a few more questions, and we’ll leave you be. While you were still conscious can you remember if anyone else was on the building’s floor with you?”

She evened out her breathing, her mind reeling. She did remember a voice that whispered into her ear.

_Seems as though you have been passed over again, little duck, but don’t worry we’ll see one another again._

That nickname sounded familiar but when she combed inside her no name attached to it came to mind.

“Yes. I think so. But with how I was it could’ve been a hallucination.”

They looked surprised. “Well, anything helps, what happened with the person.”

“He spoke to me.”

“So the person was male?”

“Yes.”

“And what did he say?”

“That I had been passed over. I think it was in reference to what happened to the doors.”

Dolly nodded. “We believe so, yes.”

She hiccupped. “He’s the one killing all the Jewish women. Isn’t he?”

“That is our assumption as of now.”

“Why didn’t he just kill me then?”

“We don’t know. We’re thinking he may kill one at a time.”

“So he’ll come back for me, right?”

Greenly’s lips tightened. “In our opinion, we think it’d be best if you took residence elsewhere, as a precaution. You have a dog, a good one at that, he’s why we believed someone was there, it looked as those he bit the assailant and he bled down the hall. You keep him as a way to protect you, maybe get yourself some mace or a gun, and we’ll give you our office and home phones in case you need anything.”

“May I ask something odd?”

“Of course, Miss Shafir.”

“Do you think these killings could be tied to the mob?”

They looked at her, perplexed. “Not that we’re aware of, why do you ask?”

“I don’t know, my imagination may be running away.”

“Well, like we’ve said if you need anything – protection, a safe place to stay, someone to talk to, anything give us a call.”

“Thank you both.”

“Thank you for your time, Miss Shafir, take care of yourself.”

She recalled her dream. “I’ll do my best.”

They gave her one last smile before leaving, allowing her to fall back on the bed and cry. When she was done, she hauled herself up, her legs wobbly as she went to wash her face. She was going to have to call someone, and she barely had a handful of people that came to mind. First, she called the school, seeing if Claudette would be able to come, but her class was on a field trip to the fire department when she asked for Janine the receptionist got really snippy refusing to interrupt an ongoing class.

Sera was glad she hadn’t given her name because she told the receptionist just what she thought about that. Next, she tried McGinty’s hoping Rocco or Doc would be there, but when she looked at the clock she should’ve known better, having it be too early to serve anyone. She kicked herself for not having either of their home numbers. Now as a last resort she got a phone book from the nurses’ station to look up the Toledo meat plant. She could picture how this was going to go and on the second ring was about to hang up, too bad someone answered.

“Toledo’s Meats, we cut ‘em and gut ‘em for ye.”

She wanted to tell the man that wasn’t the best slogan but pushed it away. “I’m sorry, but is there any way I could speak with either Connor or Murphy MacManus?”

The phone line buzzed a second. “May I ask who’s calling, ma’am?”

“Um, Sera Shafir.”

His tone became friendlier then. “Aha, so you’re the lass the boys won’t shut up about.”

“I guess so, sir.”

“Oh, don’t give me the ‘sir’ shit, they certainly don’t. I’ll get one of ‘em for ya.”

“Thank you.”

She played with the sheets as a shuffling came on the line. “Hey there, love, couldn’t even wait til the day was over ta hear from us?”

It was Murphy, and she felt bad that she was going to probably end up taking that chipper note from his voice.

“Sort of, I hate to ask but I kind of need a favor.”

“Well, ye know you can ask anything, hell if we can do it fer ye we will, even though ye stood me up ta leave with my brother last night.”

She smiled, in spite of the situation. “You can blame him for that; he said you were fine with Rocco. And to be fair you were having a nice time.”

“Aye, fine, fine, ye can both be that way. What favor ye needing, Aingeal?”

“I need a ride.”

“What happened ta yer car?”

“Um, probably in the garage at home, but I’m not allowed to drive anyways –“

The confusion was becoming clearer in Murphy’s voice. “Where are ye?”

“You don’t have to get me now, I meant when you get off work. I – I have to get Shep too.”

“The hell, where’s he? Ain’tcha supposed ta keep him with you? In case something happens to ye?”

“I am, but he’s in the pound.”

“The fuck? Where are ye love?”

She could hear muttering on the other line, and from the lilt, she could tell Connor had come to see what was going on.

“I’m in the hospital.”

“The fuckin’ hospital!”

She could hear them both going on a tangent with each other, switching to Irish and speaking so fast she couldn’t understand what they were saying. She heard them fighting, and made out a few swears at each other when Connor’s voice came on the line.

“What happened to ye, Aingeal girl, ye were fine when I saw ye last.”

She stayed silent, not sure how to say it.

“Sera, love?”

She licked her lips before blurting. “M-My neighbor was murdered in the apartment next to mine.”

The cursing started again, and she could hear Murphy yelling over his brother.

“Are ye okay? Were you hurt?”

“I saw her – she had been restrained…and hurt, more than hurt but… Shep had run in the woman’s place and I saw her, the fear and panic made me have a seizure, that’s why I’m here.”

They continued yelling at one another, then a third male joining their choir.

“Well, just be off with the two of ya then!”

“We’ll be right over ta getcha, love.”

“No, I told Murphy –“

“Fuck that, we’re getting ye, okay?”

She didn’t want to argue, and the tone he had let her know there was no discussion. Besides she wanted out of there. “Thank you.”

Connor didn’t answer going back to hollering with Murphy, after a minute she took that to mean to hang up. After that was settled, she called the animal shelter to make sure Shep was in fact there, and they told her he was fine though he was depressed being separated from his owner.  


Well, no shit, she wouldn’t want to be stuck in a cage with a bunch of strangers either.

Changing into her clothes from last night, she grimaced at the small smudge of blood on her thigh. The police had taken her shoes, there was too much blood on them and the hospital had disposed of them, leaving her stuck with plastic sandals the staff gave her. Returning the phone book she asked them if she could wait in the lobby until her ride came.

“I’m sorry, dear, we have to keep you on this floor until you’re signed out.”

“Seriously? I’ll still be in the building.”

“It’s protocol.”

She snorted retreating to the day room, glad that she had change in her purse to get some junk food out of the vending machine. She was going to need sugar and fat to stay in here. They only had a sofa and stiff chairs around the tables to sit at, and finding a deck of cards near a bible she settled for playing solitaire while munching on her candy bar. She didn’t know what happened. Things had started being good again but it had gone from yellow to red so quickly; she wasn’t sure where to go from here. She went to shuffle the deck again when she heard someone clear their throat.

“Miss Shafir, you’re, um, there are two gentlemen here for you if you could come out.”

The nurse was extremely distressed, Sera wanted to tell her that’s what they get for not letting her sit downstairs but oh well. They’d know better now. She saw the boys at the nurses’ counter both still hectic and now ornery, arguing with the nurses. She walked up to them, putting her hand on Murphy’s arm, and it was odd, as he turned to face her, seeing such anger on his face that usually held such warmth. He relaxed immediately his hands coming up to cup her face.

“Ye all right, love? They wouldn’t tell us nothin’ til they got you, almost got into a wreck getting over here.”

She smiled, putting her hands over his. “I told you both I was fine.”

Connor came up then squeezing her from behind. “Had a fuckin’ seizure ye said, that’s not nothin’. Shouldn’t have left ye alone last night. Fuckin’ sorry, love.”

She hugged him back with one arm, Murphy still holding her front. “It’s not your fault, Connor, and I’m fine.”

Murphy kissed her forehead, fear, and sadness lurking in the blue. “If anything happened ta ye love, fuck, we’d –“

She could feel the nurses watching the three of them, and their intimate display. She wanted to tell them to mind their own business but didn’t want to upset the boys any more than they were.

“It didn’t. I’m fine, I’ve recovered, walking, talking, I just want to get Shep and get home.”

She felt Connor jerk away. “Ye ain’t going back there, love.”

“I know, the police already advised me to leave, but I need to get a few things to take to the hotel –“

Murphy furrowed his brows. “Ain’t staying at no hotel either.”

The corner of her mouth quirked at their assertion. “I have to until I find somewhere else to stay.”

“Yer staying with us, Aingeal.”

Her breath caught. No. “I can’t do that.”

“Course, ye can, after all, that ye think we'd let you out of our sight?”

She rubbed her hands on her hips separating herself from them. “It’s another thing to talk about today.”

Murphy shook his head. “Nothin’ to talk about, yer staying with us.”

“Murphy, I’m tired, and my body’s still processing a mound of sedatives, I want to go to sleep not argue.”

His arm went around her. “We signed ye out before ye got here, let’s get on then.”

“I have to get Shep.”

Connor twirled keys around his fingers. “I’ll drop ye two off and I’ll get him, Aingeal, don’t worry.”

“I need clothes and stuff, come on guys, you’re already missing work, I can go –“

Murphy tugged her towards the elevators. “Taking the day off, now come on, thought ye didn’t want ta argue.”

"We already got yer clothes, girl. Where'd ye think we got the car? You sure ye should be walking, could get ye a wheelchair?"

She shook her head. "No, I'm good, I just want to change my clothes and lay down somewhere."

"We'll get ye there, girlie."


	8. Que Sera Sera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a bit shorter, but I did try to add more action.

**One of Three**

**Chapter 8 – Que Sera Sera**

"Welcome to our humble abode, milis Seraphine." (Sweet)

Looking out the car window, Sera stared up at the warehouse. "Are you sure you don't need me to come, Connor? I hate to have you –"

He held his hand up, VERITAS flashing at her. "I got this, lass, let Murph help ye get settled in. I'll get the pooch and something fer us ta eat."

She nodded. "I do need to talk to you both when you get back."

Murphy had gotten her bag, making his way to open her door. "We know, we will let's get you upstairs and comfortable first."

They were speaking to her in hushed tones, something she could have taken as patronizing, but she knew they wanted to keep her calm. Perhaps afraid of setting off another seizure, frightening her the way the night had. But she was detached from that place and onto another, wondering how she could possibly explain to them that they had become attached to a harbinger of death.

"Coming, Aingeal?"

She jerked her head up to Murphy, his blue irises anxious with concern while he waited patiently by the car door.

She tried to reassure him with a smile. "Yeah, here Connor, since you're both too stubborn to let me go you better take my license in case they need identification."

"Good call, lass, now hop on out, I'm sorry fer stickin' ye with him. But Murph will make alright company until I get back."

Getting out she was able to grin as Murphy balanced the bag, cigarette and lighter enough so he could flip his brother off. She waved to Connor letting Murphy guide her through the double doors of the building. The inside smelt a little damp, and from the assorted pieces of tools, barrels, and dollies she knew this place had been some kind of work site.

"How'd you guys find this place?"

Murphy shrugged. "We had just met Rocco, and he knew a guy, and was able to set us up here. Ain't exactly the Ritz, or all-around legal, but suits us well."

He coaxed her into the rickety lift. "Wow, Rocco sure knows a lot of guys doesn't he?"

The way she worded it caused Murphy to choke on his cigarette, making him decide to drop it and stub it out.

"I believe ye may be right on that one, Sera."

The lift stopped, shaking a little as Murphy opened the grate, pointing to the door near the end of the hall. Hitching up her stuff he went ahead of her to go inside.

 

"Have ta apologize to ye. If we'd known you'd be over we'd have cleaned up a bit."

The smell of cigarettes and something she could only connect to as male was extrusive when she walked through the door. But the place didn't bother her, it wasn't how she'd decorate it, but this wasn't her place, and these were two single men. Her mother had taught her men were cleanliness blind anyways, and growing up with her brother, hanging out with her boyfriend in high school, and going to parties held where the place was guy owned she had seen worse. Though she would have liked if the commode weren't out in the open, yeah, she'd probably look for another one on one of the other floors later. Breaking from her thoughts she saw Murphy had begun putting the scattered beer bottles and take-out containers into a garbage bag. Going up to put a hand on his shoulder, she stopped him.

"You don't have to do that. It's fine."

He began chewing the inside of his cheek. "Want to though, can't be having our girl sitting here in squalor."

It had been an offhand remark, more than likely he didn't realize he said it. But…

"Our girl, huh?"

He flushed, nearly dropping the bag. "Yeah, hoping ye are, Connor told me you'd think about it. Unless ye don't then –"

"I'm not saying I don't want to, I – I would've liked to have tried, you both amaze me, I didn't really believe guys like you two existed outside the romance section of a bookstore."

He had started to grin, the lift of lips faltering as he processed all she had said.

"Ye mean ye don't want to then?"

"It's not about want, I can't."

He tried to catch her eyes with his but she couldn't look at him. "And why can'tcha, love?"

"I can't stay here."

He stepped back, rolling his eyes, he was trying to keep good humor but she could tell he was getting exasperated.

"We've been through that; if it's about the showers or the toilet we can fix that. When Conn gets back we'll go get some plywood or something and put some walls up around it fer ye."

She shook her head. "It's not about that, though I don't know how you two go out in the open like that."

"Both got the same things, love, not that big a deal to us…so why can't ye stay?"

She stared with her nails, looking for anything else to look at besides the man in front of her. "I'd rather wait for Connor to get back so I just have to go through it once. Plus, I'd like to change clothes in case you two boot me out."

"Seraphine…c'mon love, it can't be that bad."

She couldn't get her voice above a whisper then. "To me it is."

He didn't say anything to her, but his eyes were somber. "Why don't ye get into some clean clothes and we'll relax. I'll see if somethin' on TV while ye change."

Going behind the wall of the shower, she began rifling through the duffel bag, starting to wonder if the two had a tad more fun than they ought to have when going through her things. She had to push aside a lot of her lacy underthings to get to the actual clothing.

"You and Connor put an awful lot of underwear in here for me."

She could hear the laughter in his voice from the other side of the room. "We wanted ta make sure ye had something to choose from, love. We didn't know what ye wanted to match to yer outfits."

"Hate to break it to you, but I'm not the kind of girl who matches up to my underthings to my outer ones."

"What a shame, since Conn and me do."

She snorted, able to get out some pajama pants, and a simple t-shirt. She was delighted to find her sneakers in the bag slipping them on until she knew if she'd sweep the floor or not. Coming back around she was stunned to see the local news on the rabbit-eared TV, her apartment building flashing on the screen.

" – the items in the home were undisturbed making us believe this was a planned attack against Tovia, though the police have not fully pressed that the connected murders are put under hate crimes all the women have had the same religious backgrounds –"

Her eyelids fluttered, trying to cut off the tears, failing to stifle a whimper, Murphy's head whipped around to her, cutting the TV off.

"I'm sorry, Aingeal, I shouldn't have left it on like that…please don't cry."

She let him put his arms around her, crying into his chest. "It was supposed to be me."

"Don't say things like that."

"But it's true!"

"The Lord wouldn't have let ye live if it was supposed to be you."

She pulled away, shaking her head. "You don't get it."

Murphy threw his arms up, patience worn. "Then tell me! Quit holdin' everything in and tell me!"

She looked at him, his face dour and waiting. She inhaled deeply to get her pulse calmed, moving off; she sat on one of the mattresses motioning for Murphy to join her.

"Okay, let's do it then. I'll leave it to you to explain to Connor later."

_Especially if I'm gone._

His gaze was intense as he sat across from her on the other mattress, hands on his knees as he nodded. "I can do that, now tell me why ye can't stay, why it was s'pposed ta be you."

She let her arms circle her knees as she sat up. "I – I know you were curious, back when I told you my parents were gone as well as Selene."

He nodded, motioning for her to keep going.

"They're gone because they were murdered. I haven’t talked about it, but our dad was a judge, he worked for years in bench trials. He'd seen everything from pedophiles to DUIs to armed robbers. But mostly with organized crime, some white collar, most not. Yet when you looked on it close enough, you could see a pattern emerge - aside from the other types of crimes those in the mob and such were way more likely to get off if they appeared before my dad. Well…almost two years ago now, we got to find out why. Turns out there were many off the table meetings and in turn for freedom my dad could get his pick from things off the black market, international side partnerships, or, of course, money. But during one case, he decided to convict him. Ilari Klem - very high up on the Russian mafia scene, I got firsthand experience as to some of the reasons why my dad wouldn't let him off. His people were not happy with my dad, and with those repercussions went his life. But that wasn't enough…they wanted us dead too, wanted everyone we had known or cared about wiped out. They wanted us to hurt and suffer before obliterating us…"

She was done, and she hoped it was enough, Sera didn't want to have to say how her friends were taken many not found, the only boy she had dated killed with the blunt side of a pickaxe through his skull, how cousins, aunts, and uncles were found dead by acts of what was thought was suicide, but her knowing better. She really didn't want to get into the ones she had killed, how being found place to place, it took them out or die yourself. She didn't want to have to admit to him that she would never regret killing them.

"Seraphine –"

"Don't, it's okay, but that's why I can't stay. Those cops haven't put it together yet, but that's them killing those women, I know it, I should've listened to Sapph when he told me to leave."

She scooped up the bag, ready to dart out the door when Murphy cut her off.

"We're not gonna be runnin' away here, Aingeal. Ye didn't run before and yer not now."

She pushed back her tears, trying to muster anger instead. "Don't you get it? You will die if you're around me, you will both die. I can't do that, I can't cause that."

"Conn and me are tougher than you give us credit fer."

He stopped for a minute, letting his hand linger on her face. "Ye shouldn't have had to go through all that, none of ye should have. But ye know by now that they ain't gonna stop. Runnin' won't keep 'em away, yer brother's gotta know that too."

She nodded, solemn. "We did, especially after Selene, when he left – I couldn't fight by myself. He thinks he's protecting me but he's not."

"He's scared of losin' ye, Sera, losing a piece of ye with yer sister like that, if it were Connor I'd kill every one of 'em myself."

She smirked, sadly. "That was our idea too, but we fucked up, I got shot, he got scared. It's how I ended up here."

His eyes widened. "Ye got fuckin' shot?"

She nodded, pulling up her shirt to show one of her scars. "Then there's the few knife wounds and the one in my shoulder that you've already got to see."

"Thought it was a fuckin' birthmark."

Shaking her head again she leaned her head back on the wall, deflated as a limp balloon. "I was full of hate for the longest time, I wanted to kill them for all they did, what they took away. But after a while of being away from it, I just wanted it over. Being here, and getting some semblance of life again, I want it to be left alone. I want to move on."

"And ye will, we'll make sure of that."

"Murphy –"

"Don't be givin' me that shit! You want to be here with us?"

She looked at the fierceness in his eyes. "Yes."

"Then yer stayin'. What's gonna happen will happen anyways, Aingeal, whether you're here or across the world. But we protect what's ours and on my life, I'll protect ye."

"See, I don't want that, I don't want you to give up your life for mine."

He smirked. "Fine, then I'll protect ye until I'm too tired to, then I'll tie ye up and lock ye in a safe."

She choked on her laughter. "You're a foolish idiot, Murph."

His eyes became soft then, his long fingers tracing to her neck. "Ye called me, Murph."

Her lips parted. "I'm sorry if that's something only Connor –"

"S'not like that, Sera grá, I like it, makes me feel like ye got some trust fer me."

She reached out to touch his face then, playing with the hair on his chin. "You should know I have by now, I trust both of you. I care about both of you, which is why I don't want anything bad to happen to either one of you."

He took her hand away then, lacing their fingers together. "It won’t told ye we can hold our own fine."

Her mind was still in denial on that, but she nodded. She felt his nose on her cheek, and she leaned into him before his lips came on hers. She smiled into the kiss, sighing as his hands weaved in her hair. There was a differentiation with them here, where Connor's kiss was slow and savoring, giving her enough time to move away if she wanted, Murphy's were in a frenzied hunger, giving her no chance to scurry off. Both were evenly satisfying, the act of matching him and keeping up taking her brain away from anything else. She nudged him from the door, upping his ante as she guided him to one of the mattresses. Eager as her he flopped them both down on it, a tiny whoosh exiting her lungs from the exertion. She giggled while his teeth went to her neck, nipping and sucking up until he bit a sensitive part behind her ear causing her to groan.

His voice was husky as he kissed her ear. "Now that is the most enchanting sound I've ever heard, Aingeal, you know I'm going to be trying to get that out of you every chance I can now."

Her own voice was breathy, hitching as his hands went to the bottom of her shirt, taking one finger to move it slowly upwards. "I don't think I'll mind that."

She could feel the grin of his teeth on her neck, him moving to her collarbone and back up to her lips. "Tá tú chomh milis, ár n-aingeal milis."  **(You're so sweet, our sweet angel.)**

She tugged his mouth back to hers, only stopping when her stomach started to growl.

Murphy leaned up on an elbow, grinning. "Seems you're hungry for more than just me, love."

She palmed her face. "I'm sorry."

He pulled back, standing, and she found herself missing the contact.

"Don't be sorry, we might have some crackers here, should keep ye until Connor moves his ass and gets back."

As Murphy went to search beside the refrigerator the door flew open, Shepherd running to her.

She pulled him to her, letting him kiss her face as he wriggled in her arms. "My poor baby locked you up like some criminal. Thank you, Connor."

He beamed at her. "It was nothing, was afraid they weren't goin' ta hand him over til he saw me. He was a happy little fucker then."

She grinned. "I'm sure he was. Connor set you free, didn't he?"

"Stopped fer our food, hope ye don't mind, but I gave him some on our way here."

"I guess not, after being kept like that. But don't be spoiling him."

"I won't, love, I won't. Wanted ta spoil you a little too, and got ye some get-well chocolate."

Sera smiled, thanking him as he handed her the candy bar, giving him a free hand to take a puff of his cigarette as he slung his coat on one of the dining chairs and bags of food on the table. He turned back around suddenly as if realizing something, a slow grin coming on his face.

"I see ye chose my bed, that's a good choice there."

Murphy grunted, taking the food out of the bag, and biting into a burrito. "Shut it, Conn."

"Come on, don't be getting all jealous little brother, just let the better man win on this."

"Oh, fuck ye, and you're little brother shit, ye know fer a fact that I'm the oldest! The girl needed a place to sit, don't mean she wants ta be stuck in bed with ye."

"Fuck ye! There's no way yer the oldest, Ma already said on our birthday the one who gave her the fewest gray hairs was it! How many you gave her I'm surprised she didn't leave ye off in the woods somewhere!"

"Should've left yer dumbass in the woods.”

Walking up to his brother, Connor knocked the food out of his brother's hands. Sera watched Murphy jump up, tackling Connor to the floor as the two rolled around, cursing at each other. She smiled, watching them wrestle. Connor had gotten off the bottom and had put Murphy on his stomach, pinning his arm behind his back.

"Say it! I'm the oldest!"

"Not on yer life, ye stupid shit!"

She couldn't resist anymore, the previous sorrows being washed away as she propelled herself on Connor's back, lightly wrapping an arm around his neck as she tried to tug him back.

"What the hell ye doin', love? S'pposed to be on my side here."

She laughed, letting her cheek rest on the bristly part of his hair. "I'm not being on anyone's side; I just wanted to join in. You both make it look fun."

She heard Murphy muttering on the floor. "Gettin' my arm twisted off, and ye think it's fun?"

"Oh, hush, I haven't wrestled in so long, quit being a sore loser and let me enjoy it."

Connor chuckled. "Yeah, Murph, quit being a loser and let the lass have her fun."

She let her free hand crawl up his shirt then, tickling his side as he let out an unmanly shriek, falling on his side. Murphy cackled, rolling over to look at his brother as he caught his breath.

"She's got ye figured out, Conn, knows yer a sissy that can't hold in his shit and giggles."

She laughed, getting up now that both boys were separated, and went to the table, though Connor had another plan as he rushed up and picked her up from behind.

"So ye don't like ta fight fair, do ye, Aingeal? That's fine, I'm sure Murph and me can find the places that'll make ye squeal."

She blushed, wondering if he knew what all that could imply. "Afraid I have only a few ticklish places on me, boys."

Connor grinned. "Sure we could find 'em."

"I'm sure you could, but I'd have to take off my clothes for you to do it, and I'd like to eat first."

That grin faded then, and she was able to get out of his hold to get to the table, the boys grabbing a beer before joining her.

"Ye think yer clever don't ye?"

She smirked, wiping her face before speaking. "I like to think I can be."

Connor pursed his lips, trying to keep from smiling. "Alright then, eat up woman, before we change our minds about findin' those spots on ye."

It had been a comfy afternoon, when they were finished eating Connor had pulled the TV from its place, getting excited as they found a Clint Eastwood movie.

"What d'ye mean ye never watched him?"

She shrugged, Murphy piping up in her defense. "Not all people watch yer damn westerns and shit, Conn, 'specially girls if ye knew anything about them you'd know that."

"Fuck ye, the Escape from Alcatraz ain't a western."

She bundled herself on the bed propping herself up to see. "No one said we wouldn't give it a try, I'm curious."

"See the lass wants ta watch."

"She's only being polite ta yer dumbass."

Murphy had pulled over his bed, making enough room for the three of them to sit, with Sera in the middle.

"So are all of them going to die?"

Without turning from the screen Connor held a finger to his lips. "No, love, ye just gotta watch."

She held a laugh at him, the focus he had right now was kind of disconcerting. She felt Murphy bumping shoulders with her.

"Don't mind him, he's always getting zonked off when watchin' one of these."

His arm went around her, and she could feel his heat through the blankets. "We could find somethin' ta do to zonk us out too."

Oh. The way Murphy was looking at her she wanted to, but with Connor right on the other side of them…

"But –"

"He won't care, love. You might be his, but you're mine as well."

She smiled softly. "Am I?"

He leaned in a hair's breath away. "Damn right ye are."

She breathed him in, as his mouth went over hers. The hurried pace of before being drawn out longer, his mouth and tongue taking time to explore he, one hand going right under her shirt to trace patterns on her stomach. He pulled her hips closer, tilting her back until they were yielded by Connor. They stopped as Connor turned, his expression going from mild interest to full gawking, Murphy snickered, going back to kiss her neck.

"The fuck? Ye two know yer not supposed to be kissing during the movie, don'tcha?"

She could hear the amusement in his tone, letting her know he wasn't upset with them. She couldn't help but blush at being caught though.

"I can't speak for Murphy, but I didn't plan it."

Murphy pulled her to him, kissing the side of her head. "Aye, all planned on my part, Aingeal, knew my brother's attention would be drawn away so I could have ye to myself."

Connor moved closer now that she was positioned towards him. "My attention's not away now, is it, love?"

She bit her lip before shaking her head. Connor's finger hooked under her chin bringing her lips to him in a tender kiss.

"Tá ár cailín bhinne ná milliún barraí candy, nach í, deartháir?"  **(Our girl's sweeter than a million candy bars, ain't she, brother?)**

"Go bhfuil sí, deartháir, nach, dar bhfaighidh mé riamh go leor. D'fhéadfadh a bheith addicted cheana di."  **(That she is, brother, don't think I'll ever get enough. Might already be addicted to her.)**

She shivered, two sets of hands trailing up and down her body. Connor's hands going where Murphy had been, moving her shirt up to take it off when Shepherd decided that was enough and began to growl from his makeshift bed by the dining table. Connor pouted, letting her shirt back down.

"Now look here, doggo, she might've been yers first but we gotta to work this out, can't be keepin' her to yerself all the time."

Sera let her hands thread through her hair. "I guess we will have to work out a system in case we do this again."

Murphy chuckled. "What's this, 'in case' talk? I can promise ye, it'll happen again and again and again –"

He placed kisses all up and down her face, Connor laughing at them until the next movie was announced.

"Oh, fuck yeah, you'll like Stone Killer for sure, love, it's got Charles Bronson in it –"

"He is handsome."

The playful glint held in his eyes. "Don't be going there with that, it's about a washed up cop that has to stop the mafia underworld –"

"Turn that shit off, Conn."

The lighter haired twin raised his eyebrows. "The fuck for? It's a good movie."

"Don't want ta watch that stupid shit, and neither does Sera."

She knew what he was doing. "Murph –"

He waved her off. "No, we don't need to watch a movie like that. Come on, need a smoke break anyways."

"Why the fuck do I want ta go outside so ye can smoke?"

"'Cause I need ta talk to yer stupid ass but ye don't take the hint."

"Why can't we talk in here?"

"Because I said so! C'mon!"

Throwing on his coat Murphy went outside, Connor touched her shoulder. "We'll be right back, Aingeal, goin' ta see what's got him so worked up."

He was putting his own coat on when she answered. "Me."

He turned from the door, confused. "What?"

"It's about me."

He didn't seem able to process this. "Why'd he want to talk about ye out there love?"

She shrugged, pulling the blanket back over her. "I'll be here."

He nodded, still confused as he left. Shep left his pallet and laid beside her, letting her hand up to stroke him. She thought of the Doris Day song, how her mother would sing it like a smoky whisper when she was in the kitchen. It was an easy picture to bring up: early spring, when it starts to get warmer, their mother working on breakfast before going to work. Her auburn hair in a bun that had her curls fighting to get out. Small hands working to knead the dough, scrambling but keeping grace like a dancer to make sure the eggs wouldn’t burn. Singing all the while, “ _\- the future’s not ours to see.”_ Before catching her children’s eyes and smiling.

 _What will be, will be. I hope so, mom._ "Que sera sera, right, Shep?"


	9. A Change in Perspective

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, no switching POVs, this one will be in Murphy's!

**One of Three**

**Chapter 9 – Switch in Perspective**

Murphy had only been in a half sleep when he felt Sera begin to move. The sounds of the dog whimpering prickling his ears, as he let one eye languidly slide open. He laughed inwardly not wanting to embarrass Sera, but somehow, in her trying to get close to them both she had fallen between the two mattresses, now stuck between the wedge.

"Fuck."

He had to turn his face in his pillow then, not wanting her to see his face. He felt her stumbling to the side finally getting out.

"We got to be quiet, Shep."

He heard another whimper and the dog's feet scuttling against the concrete floor as if he were bouncing around. It took him a few minutes after that to realize there was no noise. Pulling himself awake, he got up to look around finding him and his brother alone in the dark.

"Sera?"

He knew that had been pointless, the place colder, and empty. He got up and threw on some pants; she was probably looking for another bathroom, being too self-conscious to go with them a few feet away. He and Connor were going to have to fix that damn commode in here. Searching the floors, he was getting more frantic with each door. What if she went outside? But why would she go out? Easily figuring out it was the dog, he went through the double doors, pulling the pea coat on tighter, wishing he had the sense to have put a shirt on with it.

The streetlights didn't help much but he tried to find some footprints in the snow. He didn't have the training or the patience to figure out if they were hers or not. Randomly picking a way he plodded along the sidewalk looking at the empty businesses and streets before rounding off the block and going the other way around back to the apartment. What if she did decide to run away? He remembered that look she had when telling him, the stiff panic, every muscle on her rigid, eyes glazed – off someplace else. And he could tell, she wasn't in fear for herself, it was them, him and his brother. But they'd show her it'd be all right, they'd look out for her. It's what they were meant to do. He knew it the moment she held out her hand, the timid smile and wide eyes that had filled his dreams weeks before.

Connor never had a problem with voicing it out loud, but Murphy always felt bashful thinking about it, like he was insane for believing in such a thing, but he knew better. And he knew the revelations given to him and Connor was the work of the Lord. And in those dreams He had told them both someone was coming, someone who'd care for them and they for her, someone who would understand and fully grasp what it was to become a woven part to them; as flashes of a woman were thrust inside their minds. They had experienced those shared premonitions before and they were never wrong and neither had that one, the very next day being where Sera had come to Connor in flesh helping him when she saw he was in need.

He found her propped against a phone booth, her back to him, dark auburn hair unbound and curling down her back. Murphy could make out the flecks of snow that had fallen on her as she moved under the streetlight; Sera wrapped herself tighter in what appeared to be Connor's coat, the tail of it reaching the tops of her knees. He watched her, afraid to approach, whoever she was talking to had her a bit riled her face and hands animate.

She was immersed enough in the call that if he did go up to her, he'd probably get hit, his sudden appearance scaring her like it had before. So he stood back and watched, and he didn't mind, though he was curious to know who she was talking to this time of night. She had begun to nod, tucking back loose strands of hair that the glacial wind knocked into her face. With a final pull of her head, she put the receiver back in its cradle, her attention going to Shep, whatever she said to him making him jump up to her the action causing her to laugh. It was a beautiful sound, reminding him of the wind chimes his Ma would collect, and along with her moaning, he vowed to make her do it more. Shep began tugging at the leash, telling her to hurry up, but she stopped when she saw him.

"Murph? What're you doing out here?"

He shrugged, sheepish for being caught, elated how at ease she had become at using the shortened version of his name. "You were gone."

She wound the end of the leash around her knuckles, uncomfortable. "Shep woke me, he needed to go out, thought it'd be good to go for a walk."

Murphy's hands started twitching, and he cursed himself for forgetting his cigarettes. "Could've used our phone ye know."

Her eyes left his. "I know. I…it's just safer to use a payphone now. Not as easily traced."

"Would ye be mad if I asked –"

"Who I was talking to?"

He nodded, happy to have her figure it out so he didn't have to push her into it.

"A friend, since I've got to leave the apartment, I needed a way to let Sapph know, and he calls Lilly a fair amount, I wanted him to know that I was safe."

"That's good, I'm glad ye got someone who looks out fer ye both. Did she, um, know ye from before?"

Sera nodded, eyes flitting back to his. "She's been my best friend since grade school, met her in the second grade. Mom had already begun teaching the three of us languages, and we all got to choose which ones we wanted to learn and one of the ones I picked was Korean. Lilly was still learning English and some of the other kids picked on her for her dialect it pissed me off and I tried to tell from what I knew of the language so far was 'not all of us are assholes here.' We stuck together ever since."

He laughed, remembering the pictures and seeing that little girl version of Sera making friends in such a way. He stopped seeing how somber she looked.

"Sera –"

"She was taken, you know? They found out she was our friend, my friend, and took her from her home. They did horrible things to her; the only piece of good luck she got was to be found before they killed her. The three of us wired some money to her and her family, it was the only way we could say we were sorry. But, somehow, she found a way to contact us, after all that she still won't leave us alone; she and her family are in hiding now because of us and she…"

He wasn't sure what to do, his face felt hardened by this. "Why ye telling me this, think it'll scare me off? I'm sorry about yer friend, but don't ye think if she wanted she'd have stayed away? She knows what's she's into, her mind didn't change about ye and neither mine or Connor's. So it's best to knock that idea out of yer head."

She snorted, a sardonic laugh, and he could see her eyes beginning to glisten. "Maybe I am trying to scare you, enlighten you, I don't know. I just felt like I should tell you the truth about things; tell you whatever I can for some reason."

He felt himself nodding; it could do her some good to get those atrocious images out of her head after she held them in for so long.

"I don't know what I'm doing anymore, Murphy."

Her voice was doleful, but also exasperated. He glanced at her again, slack shoulders, wringing hands, unsure eyes, but what was getting to him was the fucking coat. Now that she faced him it was like the thing swallowed her whole, lapels overlapping, the material of the sleeves bunched up on her elbows so her hands were free. Seraphine was small, too small for the coat, and small compared to him. He knew for a fact she was strong, she wouldn't have survived all that shit if she weren't, but one on who knew how fucking many was a fair fight. And he'd be damned if he let her fight alone.

"Suppose the first thing we should do is get our asses back inside, Aingeal. Don't know about you but I'm freezing some important pieces off out here."

She looked from her hands, and he saw a smile forming on those rosebud lips, he went for her hand when he felt himself staggering back as she launched herself into his arms. He pulled her to him, her cold nose pressing into his neck.

"I want to stay."

It sounded as though this was a revelation to her. The awe in the sentence, like it baffled her, he knew why, the chance that something could happen to them, any of them here, was to supposed to outweigh what she wanted. He held her tightly, hoping he was conveying to her it wasn't likely he'd let her go.

"Don't want ye goin' anywhere, Sera. It'll be fine, you'll see, the only thing ye need to worry about is how ta put up with me and Conn."

He felt her smile, her nose nuzzling up and down his throat before an open mouth kissed was placed on the spot. He smirked, wondering if she knew she had kissed the Virgin Mary just now.

"If all has been settled, Mr. MacManus, you may be right and we should get back inside."

The breathy whisper caused his insides to wobble. He only nodded, not liking that he had to let her go, the heat she provided dissolving as they headed back into the building. He wanted to use the lift, but she reminded him the noise could wake up Connor, he was about to say who cared but she had already started up the steps.

"I had an idea."

He grinned at her. "Oh? Should I be scared, love?"

She shrugged, second-guessing whether to say anything now.

"Come on, now, can't get my mind a wandering and leave it like that."

She squinted her lips to the side, thinking. "You and Connor still want me to attend Mass with you this Sunday?"

His eyebrows rose. "'Course. You're not changing yer mind are ye?"

"Nope. Oddly, I'm kind of looking forward to it. But it got me to think that tomorrow or Saturday if you wanted, you and Connor would maybe attend a Shabbat service with me?"

He reached the banister at the top before her. "Shabbat?"

"You could describe it as a Jewish Mass –"

He couldn't help but smirk at her analogy. "I know, Aingeal."

He was glad to see her smile too. "Of course you do. Both of you like to play the idiot most of the time when you're both the savant. But, I just thought, since you were taking me to your religious home I should show you mine. I also thought, maybe it'd help me, perhaps clear my thoughts and find a way to guide myself again. I've never been the most religious person, but I remember it helped, believing in something."

Murphy chewed his lip. "It could help ye, being there. I know the Lord listens regardless, but when I'm in the church it feels like my prayers are louder."

She tilted her head in thought before a smile he could only place as adorable came on her. "You know, Connor asked if the two of you could light the menorah for Hanukah."

"Oh, fuck yeah, we can go and get it after work tomorrow, maybe pick up a little tree too, celebrate everything together this year."

Her nose crinkled, the smile growing, his breath catching that such an adoring look was being thrown to him. He was used to being looked at, he wasn't trying to be smug about it, but him and his brother got those heady looks of lust from girls often enough. Some leading to quickies that went nowhere, to one-nighters where the girl expected a ring the next morning. But this and many others he received from Seraphine made him want more. The way she would look at him with a mix of admiration and gratitude, sometimes wonderment, and now holding such affection the warmth of it could heat the whole damn building – it was all a tad daunting. He had to shake himself when he heard her speak.

"Sorry, Sera, didn't catch that."

She stepped closer to him. "I said if you two let me light one of those candles at your church then I'll gladly let you light the menorah for all eight nights."

"We'll let you light every candle if ye want, ye know that."

The laugh jolted him, his answer fumbling her. He ushered her inside, pulling her to his bed this time so she might not get pushed into the crevice.

"What about Connor?"

He shrugged. "He's fine, took yer place on the bed since we left."

He had, his brother had left his spot and wiggled over to the middle turning over with his arm reaching out and on the other bed.

"Are there any more blankets?"

He got her one, watching as she went to Connor's side, pulling the sets of blankets around him, tucking him in like a cocoon. He watched this idly, hands twitching again, he wasn't sure how much larger his heart could grow for her while he watched her caring for his twin. She shucked her shoes off, climbing up on the bed, waiting for him. She kept jabbing him with the only other pillow, trying to get him to take it but he pulled her up and tucked it under her head. Pulling her closer, their bodies relaxed. Her eyes were drooping when she cupped his cheek.

"Goodnight, Murph."

She had dropped off before he could say it back.

When he awoke he was alone, and before he had time to panic that she had gone out again he heard faint murmurings near the dining table. Turning over, he saw Sera fixing the table up for breakfast. The plastic bags telling him that someone had been out to get some groceries, while she set the food out Connor stayed rooted to her moving each thing she sat down, Shep trailing behind them both.

"Connor, stop."

"Just helping, love."

"Your help isn't helping."

"That's hurtful, Sera."

Murphy knew what his brother was doing, soothing her in the ways he knew, mainly humor. And from the amusement underlying her words he knew it was working. She walked to the fridge, giving Connor a smile when he scooped her to him. He whispered something in her ear, making her turn pink as she shook her head, her small hands going to play with the collar on his shirt. Connor always was the one with more self-control, his hands rubbing her back, letting fingers trace her collarbone, tickling the inside of her elbows until Murphy could tell her breathing had become harsh it wasn't until then that Connor let his lips touch her. The first one going to her forehead, letting it linger in case she wanted to say no. But she didn't, her own hands roving, letting them go up the ropes of his arms, lightly toying with the tattoos there and then on his neck before her thumbs caressed his face moving in long strokes where his eyes creased when he smiled.

_He's surely smilin' now._

And he was, and Murphy didn't blame his brother one bit. No, if it had been anyone else, he'd have choked the life out of them. But with Connor as it had always been in their lives this was meant to be shared. There was no real jealousy, sure, he wanted time with her just as Connor did, but it didn't mean it was to be wholly kept. He wondered if this was how his brother felt yesterday, seeing him kissing Sera like she was an oxygen tank and he needed a top off. From the way he had smiled he hadn't minded. Maybe it was a thing with multiple births, if one is happy, all could be happy. He hoped it was true, with Sera holding in her giggles as Connor kissed her, maybe her brother felt some of her jubilance wherever he was. When Sera pulled away, she looked alive, refreshed.

"We should wake Murphy before everything's cold."

Connor went back in, this time letting his kisses fall on her neck. Which paying attention now he could see, his pride swelling - the patches of purple he had given her yesterday.

"He's already up, ár n-cailín milis, been watchin' us like a perv." (Our sweet girl)

Murphy let himself stretch up then, not at all ashamed of being caught. "Not my fault you two are too loud. Tryin' ta get my beauty sleep and yer smooching ruined it."

Connor chuckled. "You'd need a hundred years ta get enough ta be looking halfway ta shit."

He was about to tell him to fuck off when something warm hit his arm. Blinking his eyes again, he found Sera kneeling next to the bed, a cup of coffee held out. He saw her hair pulled back, in her favorite jeans and wooly sweater, she always wore pants, it made him think on something but let it settle for later.

"Thanks, Aingeal."

"Don't be givin' him no breakfast in bed now. Ye coddle him he won't stop. 'Sides he's a fuckin' thief."

The hot liquid almost came out of his nose. "How the fuck am I a thief?"

"Took the girl right from under me, is what ye did!"

His brother was only having fun, but still…

"I told him about last night, even told him I tucked him in like the sweet boy he is, kind of changing my mind about that now."

Connor waved them off, fixing his own mug. They both preferred it black, their Ma proclaiming it would give them some hair on their chest, looking down the saying seemed to be accurate enough.

Murphy drained the cup before getting his work clothes. "Goin' ta hafta fix these damn beds though, could've smothered between the two of us and we wouldn't have known til mornin'."

Connor shrugged. "We'll get one of those foamy things that go on the top, should help."

“Could work, if Sera would let us we could bring her bed here.”

She was going to have to move all her things anyway and knowing all the shit he did now, he was sure neither of them were going to let her live by herself again.

Murphy noted she hadn’t rejected the idea when she said. "That reminds me I have to get my binders for class out of the apartment."

Connor kissed the side of her head, before going to throw on his work boots. "We'll get all yer stuff from there this weekend."

She seemed stumped then. "That's nice of you both, but I kind of need the binders for work today."

No. "Ye don't need ta be going to work today. Yer stayin' here Sera."

Her eyes turned to him then, defiant, confused. " _'I'm staying?_ ' I think I can handle my job, Murphy."

He gritted his teeth, not wanting to argue with her. "Just had a damn seizure, were in the hospital after seeing a woman torn apart, you're not goin'! We'll let yer work know if they haven't already guessed. Ye need ta take it easy, don't want to argue with ye, but I'll tie ye down if need be."

She flushed then, and he hoped he hadn't triggered something from her past.

"I can handle myself."

"We know that, love."

Leave it to Connor to try to placate everything.

"We do know that, doesn't mean yer alone anymore."

"I don't want you two feeling sorry for me. I don't need to be babied. Okay?"

He got it. "Fine, still goin' ta rest up this weekend, go in on Monday, yeah?"

She peered at him, the heat in them fading. "Does that mean we're not going out later?"

Connor looked between them. "What ye mean goin' out? Ye two make a date without me?"

Murphy snorted. "Could say that going ta Mass Sunday with her, she thought it'd be good to go to a Shabbat service with her today."

Connor nodded. "Don't sound like a bad idea. Never been in one of 'em before, first-time fer everything though ain't it?"

"Probably get something ta eat after. Gotta find out when one starts."

"The closest one to here will start at seven thirty, and we should be out by nine. Is that too late for dinner?"

"Eaten way later than that, love. So ye done fightin' with us?"

She huffed. "Not much of a fight, two of you ganging up on me."

Murphy thought of last night. "Not tryin' ta gang up on ye. Conn and me just want ye safe, want ye ta be careful fer now. Not bad ta have someone look out fer ye, is it?"

"No, I – just don't leave me out of things. I've been through this before. I want you both safe too."

Murphy went to her, letting his arms sneak around her waist. "We know, Seraphine, but ye got ta cut us a little slack. We're tryin' ta be nineties men, but we still got a bit of cavemen in us wanting ta protect ye. Ain't nothin' going ta happen to any of us. Lounge around today, we got Roc coming over later ta watch out fer ye, get ye something ta eat til we get to the store. It'll be all right today."

She groaned, annoyed. "You roped Rocco into this?"

"He hasn't gotten a full disclosure; he just knows what happened at the apartment. May not be a bad idea to let him know about it though, he works with certain people that know things, he could help us find out what they're up to where they're at and such."

She went and settled on their couch. "Maybe. Do you guys even have anything for lunch?"

Connor snorted, lighting the cigarette between his lips. "Got plenty of lunch money there, mom. Won't let those bullies on the playground get it neither."

Murphy saw her picking the foam that stuck out of the pink material. "Ass. Just feel like I should do something for you both."

"Just stay here, and feel better."

"Yeah, lass, stay here and be pretty for when we come home."

"Oh, fuck you both."

They were able to pin her down, planting kisses on her before they went out the door.

It was a slow day, the clock's needles barely moving. It'd help if he'd quit looking at them every few seconds but he doubt he could stop. He was on deveining and usually he'd have fun taking that trace amount of blood that remained and squirt it on his brother, sometimes surprising him and getting the muck into his mouth. But he didn't, Murphy's mind was going a hundred places and he didn't know where to keep it at. The other workers seemed worried, neither him nor Connor pulling anything like they do. Maybe this was what people meant when they were lovesick. He froze.

_Love?_

Murphy MacManus had never really been in love before, he doubted Connor had either. Sure there had been a few girls that kept him for a good while. But love? The only people he was sure he loved were his Ma, uncle, and brother. He didn't know what the hell he was thinking anymore.

"Ye all right there, Murph? Few more inches ye would've cut yer finger off."

He looked at his brother, the same blue as him, watching him with amusement and concern.

"Can't think straight today."

"She's fine, ye know. Like she said, she's tough. We'll get this shit sorted out proper let her have a life she deserves."

"I know, thinkin' of other stuff too."

"Oh, yeah? Like what?"

He felt his ears tingle, knowing they were going red. "Bunch o' shit…do you think we'll stay with her?"

Connor's brows knitted together. "What ye mean? Course we will fuck those pricks anyone of 'em –"

"I don't mean that, fuck…I mean…in the future, ye think the three of us will stay together?"

"What ye mean? Like marriage and shit?"

_Marriage? For fuck's sake, even his mind hadn't taken it that far._

He shook his head, grumbling. "Hell, I don't know. Now ye got me thinkin' of her in a dress again."

"Again, huh? Why ye wanting her in a dress so bad fer?"

Murphy shrugged. "Think she'd look good in one is all, thought we could take her out somewhere Saturday. Make it feel official and all that."

Connor stroked his chin. "Wouldn't be a bad idea, never thought too hard about it, but she'd be a sight in a dress, wouldn't she? She already reminds me of something out of a Renaissance painting."

Murphy fiddled with his glove. Sometimes it was like they could delve into each other's heads. "Yeah, she does."

"Good idea, brother, we can surprise her with something later."

Connor walked away, and he was about to get back to work when he heard.

"As fer yer other thinkin'. Yeah, I think we'll be together. I can see it."

Strange enough, so could Murphy, and he liked what he saw.


	10. Truly, Madly, Deeply

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [People have been asking why this has been rated M – I might have something wrong with me for making this. Fair warning. When I write I have to have an ending in mind or I'm screwed I have one for this but I'm trying to get to the point now where I coincide what I want to happen in the story as well as the film so yeah, you may be getting more of this for the next few chapter while I sort that out. And to add another switcheroo this chapter will be Connor's POV.]

**One of Three**  
**Chapter 10 – Truly, Madly, Deeply**

The day hadn't been that bad; it had been kind of entertaining watching his brother squirm during it. He was battling himself, Connor already knew, the other MacManus had always been the quieter one, the one who didn't usually want to talk about feelings or expressing himself too freely. Strange thing was adding to that he felt things more - it was like they amplified inside him. It always took him a lot of egging to get things out of Murph, but usually he'd break open sooner or later. From all the twitching he figured it was on the peak of sooner. Connor was worried about her too, didn't like the idea of leaving her alone, but Rocco was there. He might be a dumbass at times, but he could handle himself if it were needed. But now with the other shit Murph had been thinking it began to well up in his head too.

"We didn't get her any dresses when we got her things."

Murphy's eyebrow twitched. "Didn't see any, bet she has 'em all stored away for summer."

"Aye, could get her one."

"Hmmm."

Connor pretended to scoff. "What? Want ta see our girl decked out but can't go and get her one?"

"Damn shopping clerks will look at us funny."

"No they won't, usually don't give a shit as long as ye give 'em money."

Murphy wasn't looking at him, another sign he was conflicting inside. Connor could almost fill it in his gut as well.

"Why don'tcha pick a color fer her? You're artsy and shit like her, you should know what she'd look good in."

His brother clenched his knuckles, taking the meat he finished and throwing it in a bin.

"Fine, be that way. I can pick colors fine too, ye know? Maybe orange or something pale pinkish..."

Murphy grunted. "Will ye stop yer stupid shit?"

"Just makin' conversation brother."

The darker haired twin shook his head, his brother taking the bait - muttering. "She's too damn pale fer orange and shit."

"Oh, yeah? The fuck she supposed to wear then? You're pale and wear orange, seen ye do it!"

"Different fer women, how about ye quit yammering and try ta learn something about 'em?"

"How about ye inform me on the topic then?"

Murphy slammed the cleaver on the table. "She should wear something that'd go with her fuckin' eyes and shit, something green, gold, Christ sake you're driving me crazy."

"Lord's name, brother, green or gold, yeah, might be good. If it looks good on her maybe you could make a career as being one of those sissy interior decorators or somethin'."

Connor couldn't help the snicker that came out when his brother pushed them both to the floor.

He nearly pulled Murph's arm off getting him into the damned store, he wanted to hit him upside the head for being so freakin' squeamish about it. It was his idea. But it wasn't like it was just women's shit, men's was right across the room, there was no reason to get embarrassed about something so trivial.

"I'd like ta see her in this one."

Connor had pulled out a long satin dress, a deep v at the neck that went close to the navel, slits cut thigh high on the sides.

"Sure ye would, ye creeper."

He could hear some laughter in the statement and he was glad his brother was easing up.

"Ye can't say you wouldn't like the sight."

"Wouldn't mind it, but we're trying to find something fer her to wear out to church and dinner. 'Sides, I'd only want ta see her in a dress like that at home, ye imagine all the other fuckers lookin' at her in that?"

Made sense, wouldn't want to use all his energy beating tongue lolling fuckers all night.

"Okay, then, find us something."

Murphy began to shift through the hangers, fingers barely flexing on them as if sirens would go off if he moved them around too much.

"Can I help you gentlemen find something?"

"Fuck."

The surprise in the word as Murphy leapt back had Connor grinning.

"Aye, suppose some help wouldn't hurt. Tryin' ta find something fer our girl to wear out. Something fer a nice night out, nothin' too crazy, right, Murph?"

His brother had went to chewing on his thumb, a tic showing his discomfort, one he's had since they were kids. "Aye, it'll do well enough."

The shop attendant didn't seem put off that they were talking about the same girl, hell maybe she thought it was their sister, but he respected the courtesy all the same.

"And what does your girl like?"

They both turned to one another then. They had no clue, Sera had never worn a dress with them before, so how were they to know what she wanted?

"Something simple will work, comfortable, maybe something that'd work fer this time of year."

The woman nodded, a knowing smile tugging her lips. Perhaps she was used to clueless guys coming in here.

"Come this way."

On the way over were they asked what she looked like, following Murph about her skin tone and all that shit. Connor didn't pay mind to any of that, if the girl wanted to wear orange she could wear it then.

"But you don't know her size."

Murphy shook his head for their answer.

"It'll be tricky but we can take a shot at it, if it doesn't fit, she can always come and exchange it."

They nodded in agreement, hoping it wouldn't be necessary. The lady guided them through, and upon seeing some darkish green and lace Connor stopped.

"I like that one."

"It's too short, she'd freeze."

Connor huffed at his brother, but the attendant cut in before he could say anything.

"Oh, no, we'd set her up with some tights, or she could always go with leggings. Add in a shrug and an overcoat I'd say she'd be fine."

"See, fine. It's the color ye wanted, isn't it?"

"Yeah, ye think she'd like it?"

He clapped his brother's shoulder. "She'll fuckin' love it, now lass, ye care to show us these shrug things and such? We gotta be gettin' out of here before she starts ta worry."

She smiled. "No problem, and I'll think she'll be very happy as well. I think a lot of us here wish our guys were considerate enough to buy us an outfit. Gosh, most guys are afraid to just stand on this side of the department."

Connor grinned at his brother. "Ye don't say? Glad we ain't like that, eh, Murph?"

Exiting the lift, Connor swung the bag over his shoulder to hide it, hearing laughter come from the other side of the wall.

"Seems like she had a good day."

"Aye."

"Told ye she'd be fine."

"Yeah, yeah…ye smell that?"

Letting his nose take in a longer pull of air he did. It wasn't anything bad, actually it smelt good, very good, something was cooking, but…

"Ye think Rocco got some food or something?"

Murphy shrugged. "Probably had ta get her something fer lunch."

Opening the door, they were both hit by a bigger scent, or lack thereof, the room didn't smell like nicotine, guy sweat, or garbage now. It smelt like flowers and a bit of bleach. The girl had been cleaning, making Connor feel guilty, she was supposed to be resting and she was off scrubbing the place. He admitted it looked better, nothing really moved, just neater – beds made, floors swept and mopped, things dusted.

"Hey guys!"

The smile on her face made the guilt fade, and he was happy to take her in his arms when she sprung up to him.

"Ye have a good day, love?"

"I did, was quite bored at first, had nothing to do, but Rocco showed up and after staring at each other for a while went out and got some things."

"Ye didn't need ta clean ye know."

She pecked his cheek, kick starting the waves in his belly.

"I know, like I said was bored. Thought it'd be nice for you guys to come home to a clean place. You're not mad, are you? I didn't move anything, just cleaned up under it –"

"Ain't mad, Aingeal, Rocco helped ye out didn't he?"

"Sure did, couldn't have gotten anything done without him."

Rocco got up from the couch then, Connor noticing she had tucked a sheet over it to hide the bitten parts. He tossed the ball he was holding on the floor, letting Shep go after it.

"No offense guys, I've been over here a million times and never notice, but your house was fucking filthy, took us thirty minutes just to clean behind the damn fridge."

"We won't let it get like that again, hell Roc, ye know when we came here we just piled what we had in."

Sera raised her eyes to him. "So you've never cleaned it?"

"We take the garbage out on occasion."

She laughed, giving another roll inside his stomach. "What'd you bring? I thought we were going out to dinner?"

Connor grinned, knowing every tooth he had was on display. "We are, Sera, just that Murph and I thought ta get ye a little something fer it."

Her lips parted and if Rocco wasn't here, he would've licked the crease between until he was gobbling her up.

"You got me a present?"

He pulled the bag off his shoulder handing it to her. She looked at it, stunned.

"You didn't have to."

"Don't even know what's in it yet, ye might hate it."

The look she gave said that was ridiculous but before she could open it, Murphy had come back from behind the showers, seething.

"The fuck is that in there?"

Connor watched her bottom lip jut out as she turned to his brother. "Why're you mad, Murphy?"

"Why'd ye get a fuckin' stove fer?"

Connor turned to her then. "A stove?"

She shrugged a shoulder. "All you have is a microwave and coffeemaker, I wanted to be able to cook, and the one at the apartment belongs to the unit. Rocco knew someone who sells used ones so  
we went and got one. It's not that big of a deal, so quit with the macho act, Murphy."

"Not an act, ye was supposed to stay in today, after all that shit…now yer spending money when –"

"I didn't just buy it for you two, yeah, I wanted to say thank you somehow, but I eat too."

"Ye don't need to be goin' out by yerself."

"I had Rocco with me. Come on, Murph, we already fought this morning I don't want to do it anymore today."

Murphy’s stance was stiff, but he nodded. "We'll be payin' ye back fer the stove, love, no arguments on that."

Before she could reply, Connor decided to shove the bag back up. "Startin' with this. Open it, love."

With a small smile she pulled open the bag, a gasp coming out when she lifted out the material.

"You bought the girl a dress?"

Connor nodded. "Aye, takin' our girl out tonight, thought we'd all gushy up fer it."

The smile got bigger, and he sighed as his reward was a chaste but lingering kiss from her.

"Thank you, Connor."

He watched her go to Murphy, his body propped and sulking along the tile wall. He liked how she could read how she should act with them, her movements tentative as she took his hand, her body going closer when his posture relaxed. A smile forming on his lips as she whispered to him, then she was up into his arms, pulling his face to her, kissing his cheek noisily, before going for his lips.

"That's enough lovey dovey shit for me, I'll see you guys at the bar tomorrow?"

Connor grinned at his friend. "We'll be there, Roc. May leave a wee bit earlier, take her out somewhere."

"You should, can't leave her locked up in here all the damn time."

He was right.

"Oh, and thank you Rocco. Let me get those cookies before you leave."

So that's what they had smelt. The scent wafting was sugary dough and chocolate, it reminded him of his childhood back home. Planting the lid on the container, Sera handed the goodies over to Rocco.

"Thanks, there doll, if they taste half as good as they smell I'll be in heaven tonight."

She giggled. "Thanks for all your help today, we'll have to plan out a big meal or something and invite you and Doc over."

Rocco hugged her then, flipping him and Murphy off as he left.

"So where's our cookies love?"

Her smile faltered. "Oh, I only baked some for Rocco. I'll bake some for you two tomorrow."

Murphy moved from the shower wall. "What if we wanted something sweet today, love?"

She gave a timid smile to him. "I guess you'll both just have to wait until later, right now I'm going to take my present and get ready for temple."

Connor nodded. "Aye, be a good idea fer us ta shower, get the smell of meat off of us before we left as well."

Grabbing her bags she started out of the room. "Where ye goin'?"

She looked proud of herself then. "Found out while you were at work that there's another set of showers in the other room. You guys know you pay the water bill for the whole floor right?"

Connor shrugged at his brother. "We don't pay fer water love, pay fer the lights but that's all."

"Well, there's water in the other showers too, so I thought it'd be okay to just use everything in there. That way you don't have to waste money building a wall or anything."

"We don't mind doin' it ye know?"

"I know, and it's sweet of you both but I don't mind it like this, just down the hall. Made a nice bed out there for Shep too, in case – if we did anything like before…"

Connor's stomach hiked itself in his throat at what she was implying. He had to shake his head to get the sound of his heart pounding out of his ears. "T'was a good idea, aingeal."

If he had to bet money, there seemed to be something expectant in her face – the look urging him to her but he held back as she ducked out of the room. He cleaned himself up alongside his brother, wondering if he should comb his hair back, wishing they had gotten something to wear out too. But Connor let the self-consciousness pass, they were going to worship, and God didn't really give a shit what you looked like as long as your heart was to him.

"You boys ready?"

He hadn't been aware much time had passed, but seeing Seraphine primped up it surely had. His eyes couldn't help but run over her, Murph had been right about the green, the lace peeking out the front and down the back teased them with peeks of creamy skin, the color making the gold flecks in her eyes more pronounced, skirt going past the stockings they had picked out where he knew more lace was waiting at the tops of her thighs. Her hair was pulled back, coat in her arms with Shep by her side.

"You bet we are, love, kind of want ta stay in a pluck ye like some clover though."

He watched her blush, the red flowing downwards, covering the top of her cleavage.

It was much more crowded in the place than he would have liked, this was how Sera would feel come Sunday so he'd have to suck it up for her. That was until she was walking to the other side of the room, then the fake display evaporated from both of them, Murphy piping up first.

"The hell ye goin', Sera?"

She pointed over her shoulder at the pews. "Women sit over there. I'll sit on the end, it's okay."

"We don't know how ta follow the services."

"Sure you will it'll be mostly in English, except the Torah. It'll be fine."

She rubbed their arms, assuring them, before taking a seat in the back row, far off on the other damn side. Connor gestured to the back row behind them, able to keep an eye out for her, and not make fools of themselves.

As everyone was seated and getting situated he let himself look around, it was different than the cathedral but the same. There weren't any stained glass windows, but held high were several golden menorahs as well as the Star of David. The wood was dark but the walls were light, he noticed women had begun to cover their heads; men wrapping themselves in their tallit, he and Murphy had donned their own yarmulke when they had come in. It felt odd wearing a hat in a church but seeing everyone else smiling and quieting down in their garbs it seemed right.

The congregation stood when the Torah was pulled open, Connor knew many languages, Hebrew not being one of them, and he still appreciated the ancestry of it listening to the tone and lisps of the prayers. He looked to the other side, seeing Sera with her head bowed, her lips moving along. They stood again as the Torah was taken around the room, and he watched Sera's hand flit over it, bringing where it had touched to her lips. When they were seated again they went over the book of Job, Iyov for them, and he and Murphy sat straighter, glad that it was something they understood.

"If someone dies, will they live again? All the days of my hard service I will wait for my renewal to come. You will call and I will answer you; you will long for the creature your hands have made. Surely then you will count my steps but not keep track of my sins –"

Murphy nudged him, and glancing back around saw Sera's hands cupped up to her mouth, tears running down her cheeks, Shep's head on her knee to calm her. She appeared better by the last passing of the Torah, this time the two of them let their own hands brush against it, the parchment dried but soft from years of use.

"Wasn't so bad was it? Got out earlier than I thought we would too."

They were walking down to the restaurant nearby, her in between them, Connor's hand lying on the back of her neck, Murphy's around her waist. It always made him swell with pride and relief that she was fine with these displays, not caring who knew that she was with them both.

"You okay though, aren'tcha, Sera?"

She glanced to Murphy. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

Connor cleared his throat. "Ye were crying back there, love."

Her muscles stiffened. "I was. Strange, isn’t it, all the scriptures and texts they could've chosen and they picked that one for tonight."

"He knew ye were comin'."

"Maybe…Anyways I'm starving; we're going at a snail's pace here."

She was backpedaling, he'd let her, from what Murphy talked with him about it wasn't hard to understand why her faith had diminished. She was trying to find it again now, and that's what mattered. If anything the Lord would keep his eye on her, one of the reasons He sent them to her, wasn't it? Except Murphy wasn't on the same page as him.

"Ye sure, you're alright though?"

"Yes, Murph."

The tone was like a child rolling their eyes at a parent.

"Just worry about ye."

She smiled at his brother, pushing his unruly hair back. "I wish you wouldn't, not so much anyways. You two are going to have a stroke if you don't stop."

The restaurant was busier than the church, and when they were seated Murphy excused himself to the restroom. Connor couldn't help but watch her, the struggle she had before still fresh. She sighed, catching him in her peripheral vision.

"I'm not fragile, Connor."

"I know that, Aingeal –"

"I'm not breaking."

"Know that too. We're trying here, believe me, we're not used to this kind of thing though. Caring this much for anything, can't help being protective of ye."

She nodded, smiling as she took his hand. He gazed at them, measuring how much larger his was to hers, how his overtook it, how pale she was to him.

"Since you know I'm not made of glass, what do you think I'm made of, Mr. Macmanus?"

He chuckled, relieved she was joking with him. "Not sure, love, Ma always told us girls were made of sugar, spice, and all things nice. That true?"

She dropped her head, shy, before turning to him letting him see the raw nerves in her eyes. He was about to ask her what was making her that way when he realized she was pulling his hand under her skirt, trailing up towards her heat.

"How about you tell me, Connor."

He nodded, dumbly, at a loss for words, something that didn't happen often as his fingers scooted closer the tips brushing against silky lace. That touch alone and he could feel how damp she was.

"Fucking Christ, Seraphine."

Her face was red, embarrassed but aroused, pressing her lips to his ear. "Lord's name, Conn."

She pulled his hand up further, the act telling him to dive in, and with his mouth watering when he did so. He wished he could see her entirely, spread her out on the table to look as his fingers ran past her plump outer lips into her moist inner ones. Her moan was soft, her head falling onto his shoulder. From the outside, they probably looked like any other couple enjoying each other's company, but if someone got close enough…He let that thought pass, wanting to get her to make that sound again. He remembered Murphy telling him what the noise did to him and from the twitch of his own cock he knew he was a goner too.

"What's got ye so brazen tonight, love? What's got ye so wet and begging for me fingers that you just couldn't wait? Don't tell me it was the church."

He felt her lick her lips, a tiny corner of her tongue catching on his neck. "You, both of you."

He let a finger tickle her entrance, making sure she was wet enough before entering her. She groaned again, harsh breath, as her insides suckled on his finger.

"Both of us? And what about us could cause such a reaction?"

She gasped when he twisted his finger, crooking her forward. He straightened back out, wanting her to lose herself but not combust in the restaurant. Hell, he wanted to take her home now, watch her come undone over and over until her body gave out on him. As he drew his finger out, letting it go back to casually stroking she peered at him, pupils dilated from yearning, but he could see the affection…his heart constricting, the possibility that it could be love in those hazel eyes. She let a hand strum through his messy hair, gently tugging the dark blonde locks, giving him a tender kiss.

"It’s…everything. Before I met you two I didn't believe there were many good people left out there. That everyone was only out to get what they could gain. But since that morning, you've both have done nothing but give to me, not ever asking for anything back. There's something so harrowing and good about that. Both of you wanting me, both of you mine; is it that odd that I find it incredibly arousing that I have two personal white knights standing by me?"

He let his lips graze across her hairline. "Nothing odd at all, grá aingeal, we'll fight any dragon we need ta fer ye. But ye need ta understand we did ask fer something, the entire world ta be frank about it."

She grinned against him, and Connor let his finger brush on her clit, pushing the hood back to feel her shudder.

"And how's the world been treating you since then?"

Chuckling, he let his index finger hold back the hood, his middle finger circling her. She clutched onto him, and he pulled back a little making her groan in protest.

"I'd say pretty damn good, right now I got the world writhing on my fingers like a snake in a sack."

He saw her conflicting with herself then, one side wanting to tell him to fuck off, but the other winning out pulled him up and kissed him hard.

"Well, don't you two look awfully chummy over here."

Connor grinned at his brother, his fingers still on Sera, as she blushed a deep shade of red.

"You have no idea, brother, been having us a good time while Murph fell into the commode, aye, Sera?"

She nodded, breathless, causing Murphy to look confused. "Ye alright, love?"

She nodded again, back arching when Connor pressed down on her button. Murphy popped out of his seat.

"Fuck, she's havin' a seizure!"

"No, she's not, calm down."

"What d'ye mean she's not? Look at her!"

Murphy was far enough away now he could look under the table, could see the hand under her skirt. He dropped next to Sera then.

"The fuck is wrong with ye, Connor? About fifty people in here and yer doin' that to her?"

Connor saw Sera reach out to take Murphy's hand.

"It's my fault, I – I wanted him to. Wanted both of you to…"

"Look at our girl, Murph, flushed and dripping, craving the both of us. Couldn't even wait ta get her home she wants us that much. We're a couple of lucky fuckers, I'd say."

 

Murphy didn't say anything, staring at Sera. Connor knew his brother better than the back of his hand and he knew Murphy wanted to. But it took a while to coax that predatory side out of his brother, but when he pulled his hands away making Sera whimper he caught that gleam in Murphy's eyes. He pulled his hand up, wanting his brother to see, the wets digits shining in the light.

"Look at what we do to her. What was that question ye asked before, love, what ye made of?"

He stuck the fingers in his mouth then, sucking off her tart juices. "Have ta say Ma was right, you are very nice, Aingeal."

He grinned at Sera's gasping laugh, body calming down from the torment. "What about you brother, gonna get yer taste?"

Sera kissed the side of Murphy's mouth, letting him know it was okay, that she wanted him to. His brother looked around behind them, making sure the rest of the patrons were occupied with something. Still holding onto Connor she leaned into Murphy, Connor licking his lips watching his brother skim her skirt before going under.

"I'm sorry we've been so busy, what can I –"

"Fucking hell!"

Murphy had jumped out of the booth on the waitress' arrival, nearly knocking the poor girl over as he sputtered obscenities. Connor keeled over from laughing.

They barely had Shep settled in the hall and closed the door before Murphy had her pinned up, Connor had to palm himself, trying to adjust his erection. Having their girl flat against the wall as Murphy nearly ripped the dress off her, giving flashes of skin and lace that covered her. She had giggled when their eyes drunk her in, gray and black hiding her most intimate areas from their hungry eyes.

"I've already told, Murph, but I don't tend to match."

Connor grinned back at her. "Fine by me love, not much of a matching set either."

He heard his brother growling and Connor said fuck it, chucking off his shirt and working to get his boots off.

"Told ye we'd be wantin' something sweet today, lass."

Her smile was dreamy, looking at his brother while he helped to unpin her hair. "Aye, ye did."

Murphy grinned. "Got a smart mouth on ye, don’tcha?"

Connor couldn't help himself. "Maybe there's other uses fer it."

She looked struck then but it only lasted a millisecond before she smiled again.

"Maybe there is."

Connor grinned, getting himself down to his boxers as his brother did the same. "So whatcha think would be the best way to go about this, Murph?"

Murphy laid flat on his mattress. "Told ye, I want my taste. Come on, love, ye can tell us no if ye need ta, but right now I want ye out of everything but those stockings."

Christ, Connor could feel himself getting harder. Him and Murph stared as she shrugged out of her bra, dusty pink nipples standing proud, waiting for one of them to take a lick and a bite.

"Níorbh fhéidir ceann de mo breá milis cabhrú liom amach as na?"  **(Could one of my sweet loves help me out of these?)**

With those words rolling in Irish off her tongue Connor was more than happy to volunteer, kneeling before her and tugging the lacy undergarment off with his teeth. Her hands rested on his shoulders, nails digging in as he nosed her cleft, letting himself be the first to feel his mouth on the silky curls covering her mons; hearing her gasp when he had them down he turned to see his brother stroking himself through his boxers.

"Think my brother needs ye, Aingeal."

Murphy grinned and he could see the mischief hiding in his brother's eye, crooking a finger to Sera. "Come here, love, want ye here on top of me."

She looked nervous then and Connor tried to ease her with a soft kiss. Letting his hands cradle her head, pushing her hair back.

"Like Murph said, we ain't doin' anything ye don't want. Say the word and we'll stop."

She nodded eyes as innocent as a fawn as he led her over to his brother. His own breathing hiked when he saw her climb up; throwing a leg over his brother's abdomen he got a glimpse through her folds, a dark pink that matched her nipples. Murphy gripped her thighs.

"Going the wrong way there, love."

Confusion. "But I thought -"

Connor heard the glee in Murph's voice. "Want my taste, sweet girl."

She got the implication now, eyes growing. "You could smother -"

"Ain't goin' ta smother him, trust us."

She looked between them before drifting her gaze back to Murphy. "You promise to pinch me or something if you can't breathe?"

She was wriggling from Murphy's roaming hands on her legs.

"Ye have my word, now come on, Sera grá, no reason to be shy here."

Her nose crinkled. "I beg to differ, I'm naked but for these stockings, while you two -"

Connor made his way at the end of the bed, tugging down the waistband of his boxers enough so he could pull his cock out. The tip had begun to weep, and he pushed around the ooze around the head. He saw her gulp, tendons working on her neck.

"If it's alright with ye, Sera while my brother's takin' care of you, would ye want ta take care of me?"

She looked down at Murphy, wiggling his eyebrows at her, impish grin intact. Her hand shook near her mouth but she nodded. She went up his body, bending down first to kiss him, fingertips caressing his face in a loving manner; biting her lip she moved her hips up. She tried to keep her straddle up, hovering, as to not put her full weight on him but he wasn't having it, grabbing her hips he yanked her down to his mouth and Connor squeezed his eyes shut at her sharp intake of breath from the sudden invasion on her. She bowed forward and he pulled her up helping her sit straighter.

"I got ye, love."

Her pupils were blown, looking up at him, heady, his brother must have hit a particular spot her head falling on his pubic bone, her breath blowing through his own thatch of hair, hitting his shaft while her hands rested on his hips. He let his hands run through her auburn hair, and he was about to say something but forgot when her hand fisted him. His hand remained in her hair, keeping his palm flat so he wouldn't pull on it. She teased him, payback for him from earlier, or she could have been testing the waters. Those soft, full lips putting in the head, then placing kisses down his length before letting her hand take over with short strokes that went full on when she got to his balls. He wanted to buck his hips so bad, her hand beginning to play with the soft skin behind his sac. That little tongue taking a few swipes before trying to get them in her mouth.

He groaned, she could only get one in comfortably, she pressed it with her tongue to the roof of her mouth, sucking deeply on it before letting go, his blood flowing back into it. When she finished with the other one her forehead pressed forward touching the tip of him, and he heard her mewling. Looking down he saw her hips moving slow. Ever loving Christ. She was fucking his mouth, his brother's eyes opened then and they stared at one another for a moment. Both choking out a laugh at the same time. But it ceased when he felt a brushing of teeth on the underside of him, making him yelp as Sera pulled away.

"You two better not be laughing at me."

He let his hand grip her head then, instincts telling him to tug her back.

"Not at all, sweet girl, just so amazed at what yer doin' to us. How good yer makin' us feel like this..."

She moaned again, taking him in as far as he could go, bobbing languidly at first before picking up the pace. He could feel her moving, not just her mouth, but her whole body, and he could picture his brother's tongue inside her, wiggling along her walls, fingers tapping her clit. He was close, but she was closer grinding down as she shouted, the cry silent, taking him all the way in as her throat opened, muscles constricting on the head of his cock. He couldn't hold back after that, taking her head and bucking into her mouth. She held tight to his hips while he fucked her mouth, hitting the back of her throat with each thrust. He gripped her hard, bursting, the hot liquid pouring down her throat. When he stopped jerking he pulled away, hearing the little popped as he exited, looking at her she licked her lips catching what was left though some of his spunk trailed down the corner of her mouth. He wiped it with his thumb, about to apologize, not meaning to be so rough with her when she caught his hand sucking the residue off of him. She bit down when the digit was clean, smiling soft up at him before climbing off his brother. She leaned down to kiss him, wiping his forehead.

"You okay?"

"Fantastic, Aingeal."

She bent down, trying to take off his boxers. "Let me take care of you now."

"S'alright, Sera, couldn't wait, between tasting you, feeling ye moving on me, and watchin' ye take my brother's cock my balls would've turned black if I hadn't let matters fall into my own hands."

She giggled, pushing her hair behind her ear leaning to kiss the tattoo over his heart. Her gaze went back to Connor, a disarming grin as she reached for him. "And what about you, Mr. MacManus? You doing okay?"

He grinned. "Feel lighter than air, A chuid den tsaol."  **(My share of life.)**

She shook her head, smiling. The three of them falling into comfortable silence, as he and Murphy had a cigarette, letting their heartrates get back to normal before he began whispering to Murph in Italian. Stopping when something was flung at him, a pillow.

"Now what's wrong withcha, love?"

She picked up the pillow again, jutting her lip out playfully. "You two know I don't like it when you talk in languages I can't understand. Makes me nervous, especially now, when I'm naked."

Murphy snorted, taking the last drag on his cigarette. "Not naked, ye got stockings on."

She pushed against his shoulder. "Yeah, because I could get away with walking down the street this way."

Connor grinned at them. "Sure ye could love, afraid you may get a little frostbite out there though. If you're wantin' ta know so bad, we're just discussing that it's my turn."

"Your turn?"

"Only got ta play with ye in the restaurant. Then having to see my brother shatter ye like that, want ta do it myself now. Need his help, if it's alright with you."

She nodded, and let him guide her on her back, head resting in Murphy's lap. He grabbed the pillow gesturing for her to raise her hips so he could slide it under her. With her hips tilted up at him he used his elbow to spread her legs rolling on his belly to crawl up to her. On his own stomach Murphy had moved the opposite way, hands squeezing her breasts, thumbs playing with her nipples while she kissed and nibbled on whatever part glided over her. Connor bit his lip at the sight, before spreading her apart, stroking his tongue from her entrance through her labia all the way to the top to bite her mons her pelvis thrusting up at him. He chuckled, kissing her stomach before going back to envelope her inner lips letting the tip of his tongue seek out her clit.

"God, Connor...fuck...Murph."

She yelped causing Connor's gaze to flick up, seeing Murphy pinching her nipples hard.

"Lord's name, ár ngrá, goin' ta hafta say a few Hail Mary's on that."

Her back arched into his hands. "Don't know the Hail Mary, Murph."

The two brother's eyes met again, his twin's teeth gleaming.

"Don't worry, next time we'll have ye bent over a chair, each of us with a ruler ta teach it to ye."

Connor felt her body tremble under him, her vulva soaked and swollen as he inserted a finger, curving it up and flicking back and forth, he did this in and out until he found the almond shape on her upper wall, the gasp and clench of her thighs telling him he hit the mark. His brother smirked again, left hand coming down to press on her stomach.

"W-wait, got...fuck...you might...need to stop."

Connor tusked her, giving her outer lips a kiss. "Oh, no, no sweet Sera, we're almost there. We want ye ta drench us, girl. Unless ye sincerely want us ta stop, we won't til ye do."

She twisted in their grip, shaking her head fiercely, a tear slipping out of the corner of her eye. "I just..can't."

"Let go, love, s'all ye got to do."

He worked his fingers faster, Murphy's hand pushing down harder as he sucked on her dusty roses. They worked in unison and after several more minutes she stiffened up, screaming loud enough Shep started howling by the door. The hot liquid he was waiting on gushed out, hitting his face, seeping onto the bedsheets. Her breath was shaky, body quiver violently, as she tried to climb back down. Connor got up to get a rag from the shower, wetting it under the spray before getting back in the bed. Murphy had been pulled into her arms, his chin resting on her sternum.

"Goin' ta hafta change the sheets in the morning."

She pouted. "Sorry, just washed them today too."

He let the cool cloth run over her, brushing the sweat from her forehead, before dipping down to clean her cleft, still so sensitive down there she through her teeth.

"Nothing ta be sorry for, if we hadn't come already we'd be stiffer than steel right now."

Her eyes were straining to stay open. "I guess that's good then, because I can't move at all right now. If the building caught on fire one of you would have to throw me over your shoulder to get me out."

When he got under the covers he pulled her to him, Murphy remaining in her embrace, she in his. She kissed his chest, right over his heart, before moving to kiss Murphy. When she went to pull away he held her.

"Ye know we love you, don't ye, grá aingeal?"

Her forehead rested on his, and Connor heard her sigh, content.

"I love you, too, Murph."

When she sat back up she turned to him. The hand not running through his brother's hair pulling him to her. "And I love you, Conn."

"Love ye, ár n-aingeal milis. Ár cara anam." **(Our sweet angel. Our soul friend.)**

He heard the emotion in her voice. "You two put my soul back together, you know?"

Connor held her tight, eyes drifting shut as well. "As ye did ours, all three are woven now. We're braided together, ain't goin' ta let ye go, Seraphine."

Her breathing evened, falling asleep. "We are, aren’t we? I just hope we stay that way. I want this...for a...long time."

He wanted to tell her they would be. Forever if she'd have them. He wanted to say many things but he couldn't, slipping into a deep rest.


	11. Balance and Love

**One of Three**

**Chapter 11**

**[Sorry, it took me awhile to finish this one, I’m half asleep right now, and am not looking over it. Maybe a big mistake there. But the last few weeks I’ve been posting drabbles on other Reedus character – Scud from Blade, and Mac from Red Canyon, been obsessed with that one…it’s sad. Thinking of doing one for Sky next! But after this one, holiday celebrations!]**

 

Sera sat at the desk, thinking – thinking of what could lie ahead, but let it drift over to better things like everything over the weekend. She smiled, both days had been wonderful. Saturday, lazily waking, she had woke Murphy by giving him what she couldn’t the night before. Exploring him, want to know every inch of them both, placing delicate kisses and touches across his body while she went under the covers. She grinned when she had gone over his rib cage, he squirmed but stayed asleep and she kept in mind that he was ticklish on the same spot as Connor just the opposite side.

It didn’t take him long to wake when she got her mouth over him, but she took her time, teasing, letting her tongue glide over every ridge and vein. Soon his eyes were peering down at her, blue eyes navy as his breathing picked up. Before it was over Connor had woken too, propped on his side, watching them intently with hooded eyes. Grasping her elbow to pull her over when his brother calmed down from his rush. When they had all been worked over, they had to force themselves up, going back to her apartment to pack up and move her things over.

With promises of food, Rocco came, making the task much less difficult by bringing a van with him. She hadn’t wanted to go, the boys didn’t want her to go, but she knew she had to. Like when she was a girl and believed you wouldn’t have nightmares if you finished the horror movie, she believed you’d have to face things head on to move past them. The floor of the building had been cleaned up, the outside having brand new paint and paneling to get rid of the blood, though there was none on the floor there were flowers and stuffed animals littering the outside of the Tovia doorway. Sera glanced over the memorial, finding a picture of a younger version of the woman, grinning ear to ear holding onto a floppy hat as she lay on the beach. She had been happy, but now there would be no more beach trips, smiles, or anything for her anymore. It made Sera have a new wave of guilt pass on her.

_We’ll see one another again._

She’d do everything to make sure she was ready when she did. Most of the appliances belonged at the unit, and though she tried to put in her say about putting all of it in storage the guys waved her off, even Rocco agreeing that swapping most of the furnishings would be a colossal improvement to the shit they had now. She could put the vanity and dresser in the other locker room, the guys moving their place around to put the fridge closer to the shower so the bookcase could go by the couch, her photo albums placed on it. A few hours and they were done, returning her key, not making eye contact with the landlord when he gave her a pitying look. The four returned back, the guys pleased with their work, making it feel like home for her - going as far as to put up a mezuzah on the door frame. She had made them dumplings in thanks later on showing them her gratitude further as Shep slept in the hall, christening in the king-sized bed. She took notice that neither of them penetrated her, a hard thing in her blissed-out state, she’d have to ask them about it. But not on Sunday, Connor and Murphy woke her so damn early she had thrown on her clothes and went through the motions without really any idea what was going on.

Stepping into the cathedral she was able to appreciate the sight, though she was still half asleep. She wasn’t sure what to do, but she didn’t have to worry about it. Neither one of them seemed to follow the liturgy, heads down whispering a prayer under their breaths, she found herself watching them instead. Her heart thumping hard for some reason when their fingers flitted over the beads, she knew that each placement was a step in the prayer. Yet it was something to see, reminding her of when her mother or Selene would play their instruments, her mother the violin, Selene the cello. Beautiful, focused, intense, each thumbing fueled with purpose. Without thinking she let her hand out, her index finger touching Murphy’s, the one with justice on it, the one that was the bow of the instrument. Murphy was startled out of his prayer, eyes on her hand before going up to her. The makings of a smirk came across him, the quirk of his lips on the corner tugging.

“Whatcha doin’ there, Aingeal?”

Her fingers went over his hands to the beads. “Show me?”

The smirk went to a soft smile, scooting closer to wrap an arm around her, hands going over hers to put on the place of the rosary, his lips went to her ear, whispering so she could follow.

“Saint Michael the Archangel, defend us in the day of battle. Be our safeguard against the wickedness and the snares of the devil. May God rebuke him we humbly pray and do thou O Prince of the Heavenly Host, by the power of God, cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl throughout the world seeking the ruin of souls.”

Her own breathing picked up, hearing the words. She didn’t believe in angels, but she hoped if there were any they would watch over the two brothers. Perhaps even watch over her own. Murphy took his hands away, scooting back so she could see him. He began to make the sign of the cross, something she was happy to already know. She wondered as she did the movements if this was a backlash on her family if she would go to hell for observing a different faith, but then wouldn’t Murphy and Connor go too? Would God or her family care as long as she held onto her traditions? She lost the train of thought as Murphy hooked a finger under her chin, him and Connor smiling at her, gesturing for her to stand and follow. She felt like she shouldn’t, the priest still talking, but her feet moved ahead of her mind following of their own volition.

Going behind, she was placed on the side as the two went up to the crucified Jesus, laying a kiss on his feet. She turned away as if the act too intimate for her to see, letting her gaze go to the pews no one looked at them, no one angry at the disruption, maybe it wasn’t one, this didn’t appear to be the first time they did this, the priest going on as if nothing was out of the ordinary. She jumped in alarm when Connor touched her shoulder, pulling her towards the layout of votive candles. Placing themselves on either side of her, the each took the long lighter, illuminating a candle in front of them before handing it to her to light her own. She waited to listen to their words, the same meaning but different…

Connor’s being. “I am the light of the world. No follower of mine shall ever walk in darkness; no, he shall possess the light of life.”

And Murphy’s. "I have come to the world as its light, to keep anyone who believes in me from remaining in the dark.”

She knew it was New Testament, and for the life of her watching her flame flicker in the little jar, she didn’t have her own prayer to say over her internal one.

So she only bowed her head, pleading inside. “I don’t know if you’re listening, or if you can hear me. But if someone has to be hurt, if someone has to be taken again, let it be me. Sapph deserves to live a good life, Lenny - Selene deserved a good life, a lot longer than what she got, but I can’t blame you for that. I wanted to, but I don’t know if we are truly your children I guess you can’t control us all or keep us in check. I’ve been a bratty one to my own parents and know I rebelled sometimes. Will you let them know I love them, that I’m sorry that I was angry with dad for so long? That I’m okay? Will you keep Connor and Murphy safe as well? And Lilly? Can it just be me for once if it has to be someone? Please?”

Sera stopped, rubbing at her face as she let herself be guided out of the church.

“Ye okay?”

She nodded. “Yeah, thank you for doing that, didn’t last as long as I thought it would.”

The two grinned at her. “We know most of the sermons by heart. Gotta have our say with the Lord and if need be confess on occasion but He knows we’re there with Him even if we don’t say the full Mass.”

She waved, her back at the church. “Don’t you two have things you need to confess?”

Those cheeky grins were back on full display. Connor wrapping his arm around her, as Murphy lit them both up a smoke. “Another time, love, a time when we can give full disclosure, but how about we tuck intasome food? Know ye gotta be hungry gettin’ up without breakfast.”

 

* * *

 

“Is there a Miss Shafir available?”

The tone broke the daydream, the inflection despite the effort making her grin.

“What are you doing here, Conn?”

He gave a sly smile, coming into the room, holding out a red and white amaryllis. “Just wanted ta pay my favorite teacher a visit.”

She smiled, taking the flower and inhaling the sweet scent. She went to kiss his cheek, but he swerved and took her lips. She grinned into the kiss, Connor as well, grabbing onto the collar of his pea coat she pulled him back in, letting the kiss linger before pulling back.

“Thank you for the kiss and the flower. I’m afraid you’ll have to find a new teacher to chase after today.”

The smile tittered. “Why’s that, Aingeal?”

“I put in my resignation this morning, been thinking with the holiday break it’d be enough time to find someone to cover next semester.”

“Why ye quitting though?”

She cocked a brow at his quizzical expression. “I don’t think it’s the best idea to be around children if men with guns are looking for me.”

He leaned against her desk. “You’re right, but we’ll get this sorted. You’ll be able to work again.”

She played with the soft, curved petals. “Yeah, I know, you two are making me believe things will get better more and more. Might be me getting foolish…I don’t think I want to teach again though, never really wanted to teach in the first place. I always found the career too much hard labor without any support or credit, may as well dig ditches.”

He laughed. “So why didya become one then?”

_“I just think I’d be good at it, Sera.”_

_“Yeah, you would. You are good with kids, Lenny, you have more patience than anyone I know. And that includes mom. I just…you could do a lot more too.”_

_That smile - soft yet all-all knowing. Sera knew that the battle was done, hadn’t even started. Selene’s pensive face going back to stare at the playground while they both languidly swayed on the swings._

_“We’re all meant for great things. We all do great things. The problem is it may not be so great in someone else’s eyes. Something so minuscule in the abundance of the world, but I think shaping kids and giving them the tools to help them on their own way to do great things is an amazing thing to be a part of.”_

_Sera looked at her sister, Selene became exuberant on many things but the passion in her words right now – Sera sighed. “I’m sorry, Len, I wasn’t trying to talk down about it. All I want is all of us happy.”_

_“Will you still be here?”_

_“What?”_

_“Will I get to see you, hear from you every day?”_

_Sera shrugged, laughing a little. “Sure.”_

_“Then I’ll be happy.”_

She gave Connor a wistful gaze. “Don’t know, fell into my lap.”

He knew she wasn’t telling him everything, but he nodded, moving to look around the classroom.

“Ye not teaching today, then?”

She shook her head. “Nope, all the kids are in homerooms, watching movies until the party later on today.”

“Party? Havin’ a party and ye didn’t think ta invite Murph and me?”

“Afraid it must’ve slipped my mind. But I didn’t take you two as the piñata and unspiked punch kind of guys.”

“Aye, we’re many kinds of guys, love, that way we always keep things interestin’.”

She laughed silently, walking over to him as he took in the art on the walls. Sera had started to pack up the supplies that belonged to her, a few boxes littering the floor.

“Not that I’m not thrilled by the surprise visit, but why are you here? I thought you had work today?”

“Took the half shift today, Seraphine, thought we could spend some time together before we go get Murph.”

The way they said it, she could never help but to smile at hearing her full name.“I like that idea, I enjoy it when I can get to know you both separately sometimes, as much as when we’re all together.”

Connor flashed his teeth, grinning. “Aye, glad ye do.”

She sensed something, something like sadness yet it wasn’t, going up to him and letting her hand stroke the soft v of hair at the nape of his neck. “Tell me what’s the matter, Connor.”

Many plausible unfit situations came to mind – perhaps they were spending too much time together, or she was taking up too much of their space, into too much of their business. Things between the three of them were moving at an incredible pace, not to mention the unconventional nature of their relationship on top of all the baggage she came toting, yeah, many things could be wrong right now.

“It’s nothin’ Sera.”

She chewed the inside of her cheek. “Please, Conn, if something’s wrong I’d like to know so I can try to fix it.”

He shook his head, hands on his hips smiling sadly. “Now what makes ye think it’s something to fix?”

She shrugged, starting to move away when he caught her hand, he sighed, leaning into her. “It’s childish, love, absurd really…”

She let her cheek lay against him, rubbing his back to encourage him. “I’m sure it’s not, tell me.”

“Ye talk ta Murph all the time.”

She straightened back, tilting her head in confusion. “I do, is that bad?”

“No! Lord, no, love, just…I wish you’d talk ta me too. About the stuff that happened to ye, about yer life and family, I know I run my mouth more than I should, but I’ll be happy to shut it ta listen to you.”

**Gif by pendingfeels**

The words took her a minute to fully grasp. Thinking on it, she had talked to Murphy about her life, he wasn’t exactly quiet by any means but his reserved nature made it so easy to let everything out, and with how the two were, of course, they’d tell each other everything, making Connor feel left out.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel that way, Connor.”

He waved her off. “I know ye didn’t, I – if ye want ta talk I’m here too.”

“I know, I do, how about this, since it’ll be a while before they need me to chaperone, we can sit in here and I’ll give you a painting lesson while you ask me whatever you want.”

She could hear him muttering. “Do that with Murph too.”

“Conn…”

Connor shed his coat, revealing sinewy muscle because he chose to wear a thin ass shirt instead of a sweater. She’d learned they did have sweaters, long sleeved shirts more or less, and though she knew they’d gripe about it she had purchased a few thick sweaters and socks for them as gifts. Though not the only thing, she knew they’d be like children if they only got clothes, and she tried her best to find them something to engage their interests. Going through the boxes for supplies she heard Connor rifling behind her.

“What was that, Mr. MacManus?”

He grinned, cheekily. “Said I’d much rather be painting on you, Aingeal.”

She gave a similar smile back, her eyes lighting up. “I thought about the same thing before.”

He leaned closer to her. “That so, love?”

“Yes, neither of you have tattoos on your backs. Whenever you two walk around shirtless I can’t help but see the perfect canvas.”

He chuckled lifting the hem up, and she could spot the happy trail along his stomach. “Well, you bes’ be lockin’ the door there.”

“I-I didn’t mean we had to right now.”

He shrugged, that little boy look they both had patented coming out. “Don’t mind if you don’t.”

She couldn’t help but smile. “Okay, fine. Straddle a chair and make yourself comfortable.”

Locking the door, she was thankful for the school to have solid wood doors instead of ones with little windows, not needing someone to walk by and get a glimpse in. Getting her supplies together, she let her hand touch the warm expanse of flesh feeling his muscles contract under her.

“You’re not allergic to lead or anything, are you?”

“Not that I know of, love.”

“Good, I think acrylics would hold the best unless you think –“

“Don’t know anything about that, just know ink.”

“Would you prefer ink? We have calligraphy pens.”

He pursed out his lip, indifferent, shaking his head.

“What would you like on there?”

He rubbed his face. “Murphy and I always wanted ta put the Crucifixion of Christ on our backs, haven’t figured how to split it up ta do it though.”

“I’m going to assume that it leads to a fight.”

She could hear the grin in his voice. “You’d be right on that.”

She let her fingers rest on him for a bit, gratified as goosebumps rose on his skin.

“Would a scene be all right?”

He shrugged, making her sigh. “Can’t be doing that once we start, Conn.”

“Whatever ye want ta do is fine, just don’t be drawing dicks on me back and we’ll be fine.”

She snorted, starting to swirl the colors she’d need together. “When you two decide to get tattoos anyway?”

“About eighteen was fiddling around, nothin’ better ta do, and we’d been sneakin’ drinks at our uncle’s bar, got a box cutter and some pens and decided why not.”

“Wait, so you two did each other’s?”

He nodded like it was obvious, and she was tempted to smack him. “After all the teasing you give your brother, you’ve been holding out? You’re that artistic and you didn’t say anything?”

“Not no artist, love.”

She pointed to the cross on his arm. “You got that, and you gave one identical to it? I'm afraid you've got the artsy bug.”

He didn’t answer, but she could feel something in him growing, something like pride, glad to have common ground.

“Maybe you could do one for me someday.”

“Aye? What would ye be wantin’ Aingeal milis?” **(Angel Sweet)**

She held out the arm not holding to the paints, twirling the brush to expose her wrist. “A simple triangle right there.”

“A triangle?”

“Mmm-hmm, have come to notice, all good things come in threes.”

He took her hand then, kissing the pulse point. “Be glad to do it fer ye. Will hurt though.”

“I don’t mind, I’ll scream at you, but I can deal with it. How much will you charge?”

And lightning quick the Chesire cat grin was on his face.

“How about ye do up the paintin’ on me and we’ll negotiate from there?”

“Sounds good.”

She got to work, starting the base of a cliffside scene, recalling a picture she had seen of the three crosses from the execution. In her beliefs, the man hadn’t been her Messiah, but he was still a man, someone who had done good deeds for others. Someone who didn’t deserve to be punished in such a barbaric way, she respected the man Connor and Murphy held dear to them, held them right over their hearts every time they walked out the door. The beads hanging around his neck as she painted. He jerked a little a few times and she blew on his back to keep him warm.

“Want me to stop?”

“No, lass, just chilly s’all.”

“So…you going to ask me anything while I have you in my clutches?”

“Been tryin’ ta think of one that won’t upset ye.”

“I won’t get upset, Conn, anything you want to know just let it out.”

He was pondering, sighing before going on. “How about we start easy, tell me about yer family – what were they like, what would ye be doin’ this time of year?”

“Well, tonight is the first night of Hanukah, as you know –“ she stopped knowing he was smiling, him and Murph both bugging her to get out the damn menorah to put up with the tree they had already gotten. “We rotate where to go, we’d be at my paternal grandparents, Nonni and Goomba this year, our aunts and uncles and cousins would come, all of us staying the week. It would go back to primitive times, women in the kitchen and men gossiping in the living room. As kids we didn’t help much until we got older, the three of us would play with our cousins or wander off outside on our own. Their property had a wedge of woods that separated them from another house, and we’d hide in there where there was this flat patch of rock, just lay on it to look at the sky. We built a dingy fort there at one time, with old wood pallets, when we’d hear someone screaming for us we knew supper was done. We would eat until the button on our bellies expanded. Then we'd all go into the living room so the children could open their present of the night. We're all pretty much grown but we'd all still get gifts and play with the dreidel, except instead of candy or money we'd play for who had to clean up the boxes and paper from the gifts. I mean we would still get candy, it was the holidays but I mean we...didn't...am I just rambling or –“

“No, love keep going, are these ones that lived on the lake?”

“Oh, no, those were my maternal grandparents – MeMe and Popop.”

He shook his head softly; the exhaled puffs letting her know he was laughing to himself. “Some good names ye gave ‘em.”

She tugged his earlobe, going behind her to fetch something. “For the record, I didn’t come up with the names, our cousins had before we were even born so you can’t hold us on that.”

“Alright then, love, then how about – whatcha doin’ with that?”

She plugged in the hairdryer she had taken out. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep it on low, I use it to dry the kid’s picture quick so they can take them. But I thought I’d use it to dry the scene so I can start painting over that.”

“S’long as ye don’t touch my hair.”

She gave a light tug to the spikes for meanness, making him yelp in surprise hand automatically reaching up to correct it.

“Prissy.”

“Pardon me, Aingeal, what was that?”

She pressed her lips together, trying to keep from laughing. “Am I going to have to worry about you hogging mirrors?”

He leaped up then, grabbing her wrists by surprise. “I’ll hog many things, but I’m no priss, I’m one of the manliest men you’ll encounter.”

The playful growl set off her giggles, him pulling her against him. “Okay, I’m sorry for the confusion there. I do like playing with your hair though.”

She combed back through it, one hand still holding her as she raked her nails to his scalp. He groaned falling into her. “This mean no more questions then?”

She shook her head. “Told you to ask whatever you like, not strictly here either, Conn, anything you want to know all you have to do is ask and I’ll try to answer.”

He stared at her, the intensity almost making her break the gaze. She felt his hands moving to the bottom of her shirt brushing it up over her abdomen.

“Murph told me about your shoulder, would you be comfortable enough ta tell me about these?”

She blushed at the marred skin, wanting to back away until he gently stroked. The look in his eyes and the tender touch conveying the meaning that no matter what she was still beautiful to him.

“Will you sit back down so I can keep painting?”

He nodded, standing back so he could straddle the chair again. She absently stroked the mark right under the left side of her chest.

“This knife mark may be where to start; it’s when everything first went to hell anyway.”

“Sera –“

“It’s not what you’re thinking, Connor. I want to tell you, but I can’t help being bitter when I think about it. I don’t really want to go into full detail about it but it wasn’t too long after my dad was killed. We were supposed to have a squad car on us, apparently, it was between shifts and the guy that was supposed to take over thought it was okay to go and get something to eat before work. There were four of them, one of them was Klem's brother - he has many, which surprised me since I would assume you would not want to fight family for the top position in their circumstances. I know it seems like I'm backtracking, but none of us had met Klem that we know of, and seeing his brother...he was terrifying. I had never been afraid of a human being before that moment. He walked in with this smile on his face and I couldn't breathe. Sapph tried to fight them, tried to buy us time to get out. But being outmanned and with guns like that. They took him and mom in the kitchen, dragging me and Selene upstairs. With the way they looked at us – that’s when I started thrashing then, in like a millisecond came this horrible pain it took me a few seconds to understand what happened, but with the buildup of all of it together I had a seizure. Pissed myself before I passed out from it.”

“Seraphine –“

“Do you want to know about the next one?”

He didn’t answer, head lowering. He did, but he was ashamed of upsetting her. She let her hands go back to his hair, trying to comfort him, letting him know it was okay while turning off the hair dryer.

“I’m fine, Connor, it’s the past. I am afraid the next one may upset you though. Will you try not to be angry?”

“I’d never get mad at ye for any of this, I know ye did what ye had ta.”

She smiled, small and sardonic. “I know, but I meant with them. I know you and Murph both get angry even not knowing everything. And I love you both so much for that, understanding that hurt me. That it hurt the ones I love. I only want to say it, and have it out there. I don’t want you to get spent on it today.”

He nodded, lips in a fine line, determined. “If you’re willing ta share, I can do that fer ye.”

She got the brush and paints again, flipping her wrist a few times to hide the shaking. “One of my stab wounds was not too long after that, we were relocated, went through witness protection with the marshal’s office and all that the three of us got set up in a nice place. We tried to settle in. We had even gotten comfortable with going out again. I think we relied too much on the authorities to keep us safe, and on one of those nights when we were walking home Selene and I were taken." Sera paused, letting the back of her hand wipe her forehead, her insides squirming. "I felt so stupid. Murph told you about my friend I talked to the other night?”

Connor nodded again.

“She was there too. It took us a while to see her, maybe they hadn't grabbed her until later but one day we just  _saw_ it was her. It was – I think it was like a warehouse or a storage building. They kept a bunch of girls there, different ages, I think the youngest one had to be around eight or nine, the oldest I’ll say thirty. We were crammed four to a room, they’d lock us in at night and it’d be complete darkness, Lenny and I would huddle together as close as we could then. It’s stupid thinking they’d get us in the dark. They didn’t do anything with us for several days, but I’d see them send off the girls. We were made to only wear a tank top and underpants. Make sure you don't have anything you can use as a weapon against them or yourself that way. But you would know when they dolled a girl up like that they were taking them somewhere. That’s how we saw Lilly, we were being brought to the showers and she was on her way out…I shouted for her, yet another stupid mistake, I know, and when I was reprimanded she saw us too. No matter what she says, it’s our fault, my fault what she went through. The day after that we got to see a little bit of what she had experienced – you want me to keep going?”

His knuckles had gone increasingly white, his hands clamping around the chair as she talked.

**Gif by pendingfeels**

“Yeah, lass, if you’re all right, I want ye ta finish.”

She bent over, careful not to touch the paint, brushing her hand over his. “Remember, mo Prionsa na hÉireann, that I’m stronger than them, we all are. I feel terrible for the things the ones I love went through, but I’m here. And they’ll be punished, many have been.” **(My Irish prince.)**

Connor’s nose brushed her temple, but he didn’t speak, taking it she kept going.

“I won’t go into too much, but we were driven out to a man’s house. It was very nice, twice the size of anything in our neighborhood. Tall iron gates, plenty of space, pack of dogs, and girls strewn on the couch. Why they needed us, I have no idea. It was an older man, reminded me of Santa you could say, belly and white beard on him. One of the guards stayed downstairs when we were taken to his – the bedroom. My sister was terrified, and I did what I could think of, I offered myself first, and while I…did what I had to, I bit the shit out of him. While he was on the floor howling I tried to get us out the window. Selene got out, and that’s when the guard came rushing in, and when I was halfway through he stabbed me. The pain didn’t register right away I told Selene to get the fuck out of there and bang on every door she could.”

She stopped the painting near completion as she went to get the dryer again.

“What happened after that, Aingeal?”

“What do you mean?”

His voice was choked like he hadn’t drunk anything in days. “How’d ye get away?”

The question took her back. “Um, I didn’t, well, he beat me for a while, he spoke Russian and, you know, I can’t understand it. But I didn’t need to…he filled up the bathtub part away, and I was hurt enough not to fight back. I figure he was saying I wasn’t worth the trouble and he tried to drown me –“

She watched Connor’s breathing pick up, lungs going full capacity as his shoulders rose higher. He was doing his best to maintain himself, but he was struggling.

“It was Selene. Like always, she never listened, sneaking back in she found the old fucker’s gun, blew the guard’s brain out before I inhaled too much water…never put much thought into it but that time and the last time I almost drowned after getting shot. Kind of funny.”

“S’not fuckin’ funny.”

“Ironic then. Have to find humor somewhere, like I’ve said it’s done now, Conn, and so am I. Let me get the Polaroid and take a few shots and then you can see.”

“Sure it’s superb, Aingeal.”

“Don’t say that until you see…we okay?”

His chin jerked up then, that pale blue, bewildered. “Why wouldn’t we be, love?”

Her knuckled brushed into the scruff on his cheek, him taking her hand. “I’ve upset you. I knew it would; let’s wait for another time for the last one.”

He nodded, turning her hand out and kissing her palm. “I’m glad ye told me, happy ye trust me ta know. But knowing…I’ll beat any fucker that means ye any harm ta fuckin’ death, Seraphine.”

Her lip twitched sadly. “Yeah, I know, Conn. And I’d do the same for you. Both of you.”

Taking the shots, she told him to keep his muscles relaxed so the picture wouldn’t bunch up. Not believing he’d get the full effect from the snapshot she snuck him into the restroom, a hand mirror with them to try to see it properly.

“Knew it’d be gorgeous, love.”

It was a landscape, a high green knoll with a footpath leading to three crosses. She didn’t want to add the people, with their talk things were already getting morbid, but the sky with its dark purple and black meeting with the overpass of light and reddish orange of sun breaking the gloom helped convey the message.

She blushed, pleased. “Don’t think it’s what you were talking about. But the way you two talk, the way you pray, makes it appear like great happiness and sadness at the same time.”

“It was. Innocent blood being sacrificed fer sinners, fer all of us.”

She twiddled the mirror. “All of us.”

His hand came to cup the back of her head. “That’s right, and there shall be no more innocent blood spilled thereafter.”

**Gif by pendingfeels**

She nodded, going to him, letting herself find the relief of being held so close. Connor was right, there would be no more blood spilled by those who didn’t deserve it from here on out.


	12. The Green Fairy

**One of Three**  
**Chapter 12 – The Green Fairy**

**[I'm sorry for being late updating, guys. I don't know if any of you got a taste of it, but the weather's been damn crazy where I'm at. I just got my power back after four days, not to mention all the trees that fell. I've also had trouble with this one, I wrote the chapter and three thousand words in I felt like it didn't fit, wrote it again and six pages later said nope. It felt like I was forcing something I shouldn't so I nixed it. I need a beta, but I don't know how to get a beta. So I'll leave it alone. Hope this one's good…]**

She was gone again, and Murphy didn't hesitate to throw on his coat and get outside. He didn't have to go far this time, finding her sitting outside the building on the iced curb, her face buried in Shep's mane. He approached slowly, afraid of startling her.

"Sera?"

The quiet tone didn't stop her from jumping, and he could see the puffiness under her eyes, the trembling of her bottom lip – she'd been crying.

"What wrong, Sera grá?"

She shook her head, tilting so hair went into her face to hide where she could wipe any tear streaks away.

"I'm fine, Murphy, had to take Shepherd out for a bit."

He dug his hands in his coat, taking a seat beside her on the sidewalk. "Don't look fine ta me. Both know better than that, so how bout ye cut to it and tell me?"

She looked on the verge of sobbing, bringing her knees up to her chest. "I keep trying to call Sapph, tried to talk to him since the first night of Hanukah. It's the first time we've been apart during the holidays and I wanted to know how he was doing, but no one's answered. Not since the last time when we got my stuff in here…not from either of them."

He sat down and put his arm around her, making her turn into his hold to glance at him. Her eyes were round, terrified, uncertain, the glassy sheen from her earlier tears still lingering.

"Aingeal –"

"What if during this time something's happened? I mean – I think I would feel it, right? If something happened to him, I would know. But maybe that's what this is, I feel like I'm being torn inside, that could be me losing him right now."

He felt her hurt, his own insides being mangled watching those wide eyes dripping. She huddled closer to him, and he felt how cold she had become, making him wonder how long she had stayed out here.

"I can't lose him, Murph, he's all I've got left."

For a second he wanted to say she was wrong, that she had him and Connor. But he knew what she meant. It was a separate thread, though the three of them had become interlaced there were things only him and Conn would get. That went the same for her brother. There were some things in this life that could only be understood by the flesh and blood you shared with someone.

"Do you think I should go look for him? I know he's not in the same place I last saw him, he never told me where he was just in case, but it's possible there's something there to tell me."

He heard that distinct 'I' and not 'we.' She was saying she should go alone. Away from them, away from where they could keep her protected. And the thought of something happening to her had his mouth leaping to stop her.

"You're right about feeling it, love. But I think it's worry, you're scared Seraphine, completely understandable. But ye can't go out there on yer own. 'Specially with no true destination in mind. I'm not sayin' we're gonna keep our heads in da sand, but yer brother would want ye safe. And we're gonna do that. Trust us Sera, we'll do whatever we can to find yer brother."

He helped her to stand, her legs wobbling from sitting down for so long. He supported her weight until she got her footing.

"How are we supposed to find him, Murph?"

"Gonna call Roc at first light, he keeps in certain circles. He should find some sort of lead of what we can do."

Sera gave a wimpy smile, trying to take in the assurance.

"Wanna head back up, aingeal?"

She shook her head. "I don't want to sleep, can't, right now. I'll just keep you and Conn up. I might walk for a while."

"We could go somewhere?"

She looked unsure but eager. "Where?"

He shrugged, taking the leash from her hand. "I know a place that's still open."

"Not McGinty's?"

Murphy couldn't stop but smirk. "Nope, not McGinty's."

"What about Connor?"

Murphy rolled his eyes. "Fuck him, he got his day with ye. If ye want, I'd like ye ta spend da night with me."

Her smile was genial, anxiety lingering in her features. "Okay. Murph, you got me. I'm curious to see where you take me at –" she glanced at her watch, "twelve forty at night, which makes it technically Christmas. Nothing's open on Christmas."

He grinned, taking her by the hand. "Trust me, love, there's always somewhere."

It was a good distance to walk and he kept his mouth shut. He knew she was struggling inside to keep herself together, so he allowed her peace until she was ready to come out. Yet he wasn't used to so much silence, and the impulse to break it had him fumbling to stick a cigarette in his mouth to muzzle it.

"I used to get jealous when I was a kid. So many Christmas decorations everywhere, but they are beautiful."

They had been walking past, from what he could tell in the dim light was the post office, the large pine they decorated blocking out the sign of the building. It was lit up in gold: the lights, ornaments, tinsel, and star all glimmering. The scene was a good contrast to their little tree back home where they paid tribute to Ireland by using the flag's colors.

"Yeah, a lot of 'em are nice ta look at. Always liked ta see the houses all lit up. Though some crazy bastards pay a fortune ta do up their yard."

She laughed, a genuine one, and he was glad to see her tension fade. "I like to look too. I enjoy the houses that do their lights in time to the music. It's like a concert on someone's lawn."

They walked past the tree, him taking her arm as they approached an intersection to cross.

"Those people have too much time on their hands if they do all that."

Her smile stayed in place, a playfulness entering her eyes. Letting her lean into him as they trudged several more blocks in the snow. When they approached the deserted building he saw her blink, skeptical.

"It's closed, Murph."

True the lights out front were out, and there wasn't a soul in sight, but he knew better. Putting a hand on his heart he motioned for her to follow with the other.

"Trust me, aingeal, it's not. We're just not at the correct entrance."

She let him lead her around to a loading area, her eyes taking in the towering pillars as he rang the bell. It took a while and he was about to call defeat that it was closed for the holidays when a burly man came and opened the door.

"Name?"

"MacManus."

The man nodded, moving so they could get in. Sera motioned to Shep but Murphy shook his head. People brought all kinds of things in; it was part of the attraction. When he heard her laughing he turned back to her grinning as well.

"What's so funny, Sera?"

She waved her hand around them. "All of this, it's a bit bizarre. So, they what, close the museum and turn it into a nightclub after hours?"

He moved his thumb across his lips, proud of himself for providing a distraction to her. "Sort of, a few people bring in food or hire someone ta cook accordin' to da occasion. Gives people a good chance ta look at the exhibits before they pack 'em up and cart 'em fer something else."

Her face was awestruck when they made it to the main lobby. He was happy to see the woman with the birds was still attending, make it less awkward for Sera and Shep.

"How'd you discover this place?"

"Wasn't hard. Had a coworker at one time that told us about it, said there was good drinks and good food. Why not try it?"

"So you and Connor come here a lot?"

He stiffened then. "Uh, no, Conn doesn't come here."

She shook her head before taking his hand. "He doesn't know you come here, does he?"

He shook his head, not making eye contact. "No, he doesn't. I know Conn wouldn't really think anything of it, but he'd give me a ribbing about it. I don't care about that so much. Hell, we both find anything we can to poke fun at each other. I love doing things with my brother, being around him, I just…"

"Needed something that was yours?"

He shifted on his feet, nodding, before glancing up. Her face was calm, a small smile on her face.

"But you shared this with me?"

"Well, yeah, you're interested in this too. Like ta be here by myself sometimes, but it'd be nice ta have someone to talk to about it."

She went to him, squeezing into his side, and he was happy to match the hold with his own.

"Thank you for doing this. Should we look around? Though I'd be fine sitting and seeing everyone's pets…that a lizard?"

He chuckled. "Yep, a monitor lizard, seen him before, he's harmless."

She shook her head, boggled. "Feel like I fell down a rabbit hole or something."

He led her up the stairs, reaching for her hand when they weaved past people. "Expecting us ta go to a tea party then?"

She laughed. "Wouldn't mind it, but I know you prefer coffee."

"Ye do too."

"True."

She sprinted past him then, entering the white room. "It's Elsi Giauque, this is incredible, Murph. No one's shown her work in over a decade and never in America. "

He looked at the woven boxes, glancing back to her seeing her eyes light up in overwhelmed appreciation. He saw her hand twitching, wanting so bad to touch the delicate strands.

"'Élément spatial,' Do feel like I'm in space, make ye feel like yer floating."

She spun to him, grinning. "Yes! Exactly, at the same giving the illusion that everything's being held up but you."

This is why he wanted to bring her, she got it. Understood, and thrilled to be a part in it. He let her duck and go through the maze of boxes before leading her into the next room.

"Oh, spiders."

It was a crocheted web. It had many gaps and tears, some spaces looking like woven boxes or dreamcatchers.

"Took some plannin' on my part, love, but I finally ensnared ye."

The carefree trickles of laughter hitched his stomach, she was happy in this moment with him. Forgetting her troubles for now, and it made him happy too.

"Who said you ensnared anything? Maybe I willingly fell into the trap."

He was feeling shy again, pissing himself off. "Glad ye did."

She kissed his cheek, and he wanted to pull her in. But she eluded his hands.

"I'm afraid I enjoy the chase a tiny bit more."

She took off then, and his stomach flopped with giddiness as he went to catch her. It ended when he didn't find her right off. Each room he turned over either vacant or without any sign of her or Shepherd.

"Sera!"

He was about to get someone on the intercom when he felt a pair of arms clasp around his waist.

"Caught you."

"Sera! Jesus, lass, I was gettin' worried. Couldn't find ye."

Her face went contrite. "Sorry, Murph."

"S'okay, how about we stick together from here on?"

She smiled. "Fine by me. What would you like to see now?"

He gestured behind him. "Wanna go get a drink, and sit a minute?"

"Sure."

"They got those fruity drinks if ye ain't up ta the hard stuff."

She mock glared at him. "I think I keep up pretty well for someone who doesn't drink much."

"Aye, ye do. Just don't want yer stomach feelin' it da next day s'all."

Approaching the bar, they were greeted by the bartender asking what they would like.

"Guinness is fine with me, how bout you, aingeal?"

She wasn't looking at the bar though, but a couple sitting at the fountain several feet away.

"I want what they have."

He put his arm around her. "Thought we did."

She snorted before turning her eyes to the bartender who chuckled.

"That'd be verte absinthe, a specialty tonight. One of the curators here had it bought at auction, it's sealed date was 1910."

He saw Sera's gaze wither. "Oh, that sounds expensive."

"I'll get it fer ye, love."

She shook her head, when the bartender spoke up.

"The first shot's on the house for all lovebirds tonight. If you like it we have Absente, which is Spanish absinthe. It was made more recent and easily bought so they're free."

"We'll try a shot of the fancy one first then."

It was an interesting process, watching the sugar melt into the cup, the bright green turning murky as it drizzled in. Didn't look quite appetizing, but he expected it'd be fine for one shot.

Taking her glass, Sera sniffed the contents. "Do you think we'll see the green fairy?"

He grinned. "Never drank anything enough that I saw a Tinkerbell."

She looked to the bartender who shook his head. "Not likely, ma'am, there's no hallucinogenic properties in the contents. Mostly people who seen things are either very drunk, mentally unstable, or they took something beforehand."

She clinked her glass to his. "Or they wanted to see something so bad that they did. Bottom's up."

Her eyes were focused on the ceiling, face showing reluctance until the she got the taste.

"It tastes like licorice."

He never cared for licorice, but he raised his glass just the same and drained it. He studied the frothy remains at the bottom, unimpressed by the drink.

"Didn't taste any alcohol in there."

The bartender raised his brows up, amused. "It's sixty-eight percent alcohol, sir."

Murphy pointed to the various liquor bottles. "Is that other one stronger?"

"It's seventy-four percent."

"Give me a shot of that one then."

He glanced over at Sera. "Ye want some more?"

She shook her head. "Nope. I think it's meant to trick you, the taste, I might be falling over my feet on this one shot."

"Doubt that, I'll take a few shots and a bottle of Guinness. After that if ye want ta look around some more –"

She kissed him then, he could taste licorice from the anise on her. He couldn't help the smirk when she pulled away.

"See that fairy's workin' fer me."

"Hush, I'm having fun. Thank you for bringing me here, Murphy."

The sincerity stilled him. "S'no problem, love. Place cheers me up sometimes, hoping it'd do that fer you."

"It did. Take your shots I want a dance before we go."

He felt the liquid burn upwards in his nasal cavity, the liquid sputtering a dribble from his lips. There were a few people dancing nearby, an antique record player crooning off a melody. He began to shake his head, wiping up the spit with the back of his arm. Connor was the dancer, not him, Murphy's way of romancing played to sitting in the back booth and splitting a smoke. Yet the way Sera looked at him made him compliant. Taking one more swig he followed her, terrified he was going to make a fool of himself. She stood waiting for him, unafraid, as he put his hands on her waist, winding her arms around his neck he began to sway to the music, unsure of what to do with his feet.

"This is why I like to dance, makes a good excuse to be close in public."

He gave a toothy smile then. "If that's all ye wanted…"

He trailed off when she tucked her head beneath his chin, the light thud of her heart beating on his chest. He felt at ease, didn't give a damn if people looked, or if he tripped on his own feet – he had his angel in his arms.

"Tá a fhios agat Is breá liom tú, nach tú?" (You know I love you, don't you?)

She pulled away, enough so that she could see his eyes. "Is féidir liom. Agus is breá liom tú ró. An bhfuil a fhios agat go bhfuil?"  **(I do. And I love you too. Do you know that?)**

His smile was gentle, trying not to break the moment. "Sea mo ghrá. Ach raibh a fhios agat go bhfuil tú mo chéad? Measaim go bhféadfadh tú a bheith ar mo amháin."  **(Yes, my love. But did you know that you're my first? I think you might be my only.)**

He began to panic, waiting for her reaction. Twenty-seven and never been in love before her, saying that she may be the only one for him. He was implying so much and he was afraid that with everything happening it would put her off. But just the same with all the things that could happen he wasn't going to let the opportunity go. He wasn't going to wake up and regret tomorrow. Her forehead went to rest on his jaw, as the song ended, he could hear the inhalation of breath.

"Tá sé eagla orm go is dóigh liom an gcéanna mar gheall ort. An bheirt agaibh."  **(It scares me that I feel the same about you. Both of you.)**

He folded himself so there wasn't any space between them letting his hands grip her hips. He dipped down taking her lips more roughly than he intended. Murphy didn't want her to be scared, but he wanted her to know it was okay. That he was scared too, scared of screwing things up, and scared of the things that could get in the way. She kissed back with equal vigor, hands going from his neck to his hair, trying to pull him closer though there wasn't any distance left. A growl rumbled up, he could feel it playing across his ribs up to his throat and into her mouth. She groaned when it hit her, hands beginning to wander away under his shirt.

"Guys are da ones to sneak a grope, girlie."

Her teeth grazed his jaw when he pulled away, and he wanted to feel that plush, little mouth all on him.

"Didn't think I was sneaking, Mr. MacManus, only trying to keep some composure since we're surrounded."

Fuck they were, between her and the drinks his head had swum away. "Be best if we get our way home, aye lass?"

"Sounds like a good damn idea, laddie."

He chuckled. "You just wait, Aingeal. Be gettin' ye fer that smart mouth."

It was more difficult than he thought, and Sera was the one having to lead the way back.

"That ain't fair."

"What's not fair?"

"Fuckin' drinks, didn't taste no alcohol in 'em. Now they're puttin' me off my ass."

She giggled, trying to keep him balanced against her. Honestly, he was exaggerating, sure he was feeling smacked harder by the shots than he thought he would but he was capable of walking fine on his own if he wanted. He enjoyed her hands on him, Connor would say she was babying him, but he didn't give a shit. He liked her taking care of him, even if he came off as a drunk.

"From how you look you may have a good chance of seeing that fairy tonight."

He stood straighter then, pulling out of her hold and taking her in his. "Don't need ta see a fuckin' fairy, grá, already caught me an angel."

She squirmed in his embrace, playful, as she snorted. "I think you're full of it."

He wiggled his eyebrows. "Could make ye full of something."

He loved watching that flush came up in her pale cheeks as she cleared her throat. "Got to say, I've wanted to bring it up so you better not be teasing me on that. I've wanted to…"

He saw that flush turn deeper, feeling his own as his neck began heating up. "Wanted what, Seraphine?"

"Both of you, I'm not sure how we could go about the first time, but I’ve wanted to somehow…"

God, she's thought about it. Him and Connor had shared a few girls before, but never had one like this that had offered herself to them both, much less at the same time.

"Need ta take that road slow, lass, want ta savor ye on my own first. Connor’s always had this itch ta get everything right. Doesn’t want to mess things up with ye. But hearin’ this - dear brother can just sit there and watch me make yer insides crumble, how's that sound?"

"Da fuck you three been?"

His gaze slid to Connor, clothes thrown on haphazardly having flipped out that he was alone.

"Couldn't sleep, thought I'd take our girl ta see da sights."

"Ye could've left a fuckin' note, woke up and couldn't find either of ye."

He smirked, Sera was their mediator now, though Murphy couldn't help the twinge of guilt in worrying his brother.

"We're sorry, Conn, I was having a rough night, and Murphy was trying to cheer me up."

"Could've woke me, love, would've been glad ta put a smile on yer face."

Murphy laughed then. "That's just what we were gettin' home ta do."

His brother tilted his head in confusion, while Murphy pulled Sera behind him to their building.

"Murph said you've been waiting on the right moment. I think now is a pretty good one, and he agreed with me."

"Whole-heartedly, and ye can either sulk or join in."

Going into their room, he let Sera settle Shepherd down, taking the time to strip down to his boxers now.

"We're rushing her."

"I don't think we are, Conn. Think we all need this."

He fucking did for sure. He was so hard he thought his dick would take off like a damn rocket. He flopped down on the bed, lounging until she got back when he opened his arms.

"Take me, lass, I'm all yers. Not you."

He was pointing to Connor who had walked in with a scowl, arms folded over his chest.

"Conn, you okay? If you don't want to do this with us…if I’m being too forward with this or anything, you can tell me. Because I’ll understand. But I don't need the bed to be covered in rose petals or champagne I just want you both."

His brother's gaze softened on her. "Just want ya ta remember it, grá milis, want ye ta know how much ye mean ta us."

Murphy watched her approach him, her knuckles gliding on his cheek. "It's not going to be the location or the stuff that does that, it's you, Connor, you and Murph."

Her words touched him, and were easily felt that it got to his brother too.

"Yer needed too, aingeal, wouldn't want Connor's naked ass near me if you weren't involved."

"Fuck off, Murph."

He grinned, happy the mood was lightened. "If it's all right with ye, Sera, you're wearing too many damn clothes fer me."

She turned back to Connor, sweet smile on her face as she tugged his sleeve towards the bed. Letting go she made her way over taking her jacket and shirt off while she did.

"Ye didn't wear a fucking bra? The hell, we were wandering all over town with ye like that?"

She smirked. "Forgive me, thought me and Shep were only going around the block."

She shimmied on her knees towards him on the bed. "Where're yer manners at? Don't put yer shoes on da bed lass."

She grinned, rolling on her back to kick them off. "Connor?"

"He'll be wanting a show, aingeal."

He saw that impish look in his brother's eye, a telltale sign he was right. Whereas Murphy tended to overlook things, jumping to do them his own way – Connor was an observer. He liked to study what he was getting into, usually one of his stupid ideas popping in his head while he was doing it.

"Come on, Sera, I want ta see the angel."

She was hesitant for a second, intimidated at being watched, scrutinized, but her eyes lit back up on him. "Fairy."

"Nope, want my angel; take those pants off fer us."

She shook her head in amusement, hands going to her jeans as she chucked off her boots. Yes, where Connor thought things out, Murphy preferred his instincts to guide him. Right now, he wanted his girl bare, and from the looks of the tent in his brother's pants so did he.

"Ye gonna take those off or punch a hole in the only good pair of pants ye got?"

Connor swore at him, making him laugh, surprised when soft skin was pressed against him.

"You should be nice to your brother."

He groaned, his hands racing across Sera's flesh. The way she had positioned herself made it easy for him to lick up the middle of her sternum to her collarbone, nudging his nose as he planted kisses around her breasts.

"Will do just about anything fer ye, love, but that ain't gonna happen. 'Sides he's always mean ta me."

"Am not ye damn prick."

"See."

She snorted at them both, her mouth mimicking his as she trailed up from his navel creating a fork as she went to tweak a nipple with the tip of her tongue. She shivered as the blunt nubs of his nails trailed down her spine to grab at the globes of her backside. She was paying him back for all the times he left hickeys on her, feeling that delicious suction on his neck and chest; those soft hands moving aimless around his skin, tugging the curls on hair that was over his heart. He felt a dip in the bed and knew it was Connor, he knew his brother was coming in for a better look taking time to get comfortable at the same time. They had discussed this before, and would both take their own time with her, not wanting to scare or hurt her with too much at once. He knew he's brother would enjoy sitting there and watching until he got his turn.

"Flip over, Seraphine."

She slid off his chest, letting him guide her back to the bed. He couldn't help but ogle her – pale milky skin with a few scattered freckles from where the sun had touched. Deep burgundy lips that matched her nipples and the coloring to her labia, hazel eyes glinting as she squirmed under his hands and his scrutiny. His gaze flicked back down, he had only begun to touch her yet with her legs open to fit him in he could see how wet she was her inner folds swollen as they peeked out from her lips. Lowering himself he heard her gasp as his tongue caught her juice, wanting to lap her up like a bowl of soup, and when she started mewling her hips bucking up he knew she was almost there. He went back up, feeling her knees on his hips.

"Murph."

That low moan of desperation had him quivering, kissing her to fill her mouth with the amaroidal taste of herself. Snugging himself in, he fit himself at her entrance, the little hole pulsing for him to come in, he was going to when his brother had to ruin it.

"The fuck ye doin'?"

He knew he his eyes looked crazed, but he didn't give two shits at the moment. "The fuck's it look like?"

Connor rolled from his side. "We don't have no protection on us, do we?"

"Fuck."

He hadn't thought of that, none of them had, and he was running his hand over his hair when he felt Sera tugging him back.

"No, it's okay, it's fine –"

"Sera we can't take a chance like that right now."

"No, I take the pills, the fucking - birth control…will you just get the fuck inside me?"

He couldn't stop the chuckle that came. "A tad anxious, aren'tcha there?"

"Well, if you don't want to…"

He pinned her down when she started to roll towards Connor, giving a moment to gather her up before spearing into her folds. He caught a hold of his brother's gasp as she screamed in surprise. She was snug around him, the perfect amount of warmth and wetness. He was close to spilling into her that he had to take a few breaths before he thought to move. It'd been a while, the months they took to get to know one another had rendered them celibate, and though her mouth was bliss it hadn't prepared him for this. After a few practice pumps he picked up his rhythm tilting her hips to push himself in further. Her light keening was throwing him off, the sound of her trying to hold back and failing making his balls draw up tighter and quicker than he wanted. Keeping up his pace, he propped himself on one arm to reach between them and tease her clit. He had to make sure she came along with him, and the way she was driving her hips back into his, her nails digging in his forearms she was getting there.

"Murphy."

A breathless whisper, he peered up to see her eyes feverish as if she were in pain. His fingers gathered up the hardened nub, tips of his fingers stoking downward until her body stiffened, head thrown back as she let out a strangled yelp. He felt her walls spasm, like a vacuum, milking him so his body could let go inside her. And not long after she came apart he was able to follow, except at the last second he decided to pull out. His fluids pouring out over her stomach, he smiled tired, letting his head fall between her breasts her heartbeat erratic, both gulping air to steady their breathing.

"Since ye painted my brother, thought I'd take the chance ta paint ye, ár stór milis."  **(Our sweet treasure.)**

He heard a winded chuckle in response, he closed his eyes, feeling her hands come around him – one rubbing his back while the other wiped the sweat from his face, smoothing back his hair. After a few minutes he heard Connor muttering, knowing his brother was checking to see if Sera was all right enough to continue. He could barely move, and he hoped the assertion didn't drain everything from her.

"Move yer ass, Murph."

He grunted in protest, but rolled over as gentle as he could. Connor shifted, regarding Sera to make sure she really was okay while he helped situate her on top of him. The way Murphy had himself, he lay side by side with his brother, able to see almost the exact same angle as him. Connor guided her hips in a much more unhurried pace, and Murphy was mesmerized watching Sera's body slowly swallow his brother's up. She seemed fine with the speed that was set, her hands skimming over his torso. She watched in concentration, awed by the way Connor's muscles would twitch and jump under her touch. As the temp picked up, Murphy saw a solitary bead of sweat making its way down her neck, past the valley of her chest, down to her stomach. He wanted to lick it up, but he knew his time had passed for right now, the teardrop trail belonging to Connor.

Connor's expression was one of pure marvel, like his eyes couldn't believe the sight in front of him. Murphy noted neither looked away from the other, the intensity of their gaze daunting as she took control rolling her hips faster, the vein in Connor's forehead was throbbing, a sign he was approaching the edge. His brother sat up, taking her waist, drawing out their strokes.

"Ye almost there, aingeal? Ye gotta come fer me too."

She nodded, their position draping her hair over them when she bent to kiss him. Connor let her decide the speed, her body hammering up and down along him when she finally pushed her hips down hard, inhaling sharply though no sound came. Murphy saw his brother's face turn a bright red, before emptying himself into her. Sliding off, Sera fit herself between them on the bed, and he reached out the tuck the hair hiding her face away.

"Ye okay?"

She didn't respond at first and he thought she had fallen asleep.

"I think I found the way to Nirvana."

Connor laughed. "So yer a Buddhist now?"

She hummed in reply, reaching out to bring him to her to kiss him. She did the same with Murphy, her arm moving behind her to find him.

"Thank you both, I think I'll be able to sleep now."

Murphy couldn't stop his hands gliding down her body, caressing her while her body sunk off to rest.

"We love ye, girl."

"Hmmm…I love you both too….so much."

When her breathing evened out he looked at his brother. "Wanna get a smoke?"

"Aye. Sneak out on da rooftop and let her sleep."

Murphy nodded, throwing on his boxers and coat along with his brother following up the set of stairs that led to the top of the building.

"So ye gonna tell me why both of ye were out so late?"

Murphy chewed his lip, letting his cigarette bounce between his fingers. "Found her out there on the curb. She's been tryin' ta call her brother. But neither him or da other girl's been answering."

Connor's brow creased with concern. "Ye think something happened to 'em?"

"She does. Was cryin' her eyes out, she doesn't know what ta do. Hell, Conn, I don't either. But she wanted ta take off not knowin' where to go or what she was getting inta. I wasn't gonna let her take off like that."

Connor ran a hand over his face. "No, she don't need ta leave. She's panicking, probably not able ta think straight right now. We need ta set her down and talk to her about it…we took advantage of her tonight,

Murph. She's out there feelin' like that and we toss her into bed with us."

"I don't think that's how it is, Conn. I think it comforted her. Showed her we're with her."

"Maybe. Can't imagine what's goin' on in her head though. Ta lose her sister and now her brother's lost out there…couldn't…it'd drive me insane if it were you."

Murphy nodded solemnly. "Aye, we'll find him, take care of whatever needs ta be done."

Connor nodded in agreement, flicking his butt into the alley. "Better get back inside, freezin' my damn nuts off out here."

Murphy waited a while more, looking out at the darkened city. It was quiet, peaceful, and he wondered if it would last. Getting back inside, Conn had already settled back in bed, arm slung over Sera to pull her against him. His mind was too awake to follow, opting instead to pull off one of the albums they had stored from the shelf. He enjoyed looking through the pictures, though it embarrassed their girl. A picture was a window, and he wanted to peer into as many as he could. Watching her grow up in each frame, sometimes pouting, but overall she smiled. Especially with her family, the one he turned to now of her and her sister. They favored each other a great deal. Twin broad smiles as they faced each other. The two untroubled without a care, laughter radiating off the page, he wanted Sera to have that look again. With his back resting on the headboard he settled in, Sera's warm body beside him as he thumbed through her past. Soon he was slumping over while he fell asleep.

He woke to something warm on his face, scrunching up his eyes before they opened he was graced with Connor sidled right up next to him. He was about to smack him when he heard the shower running. Sera wasn't in bed with them. With a sly grin, he took off his boxers jumping from the bed to get behind the curtain. Her chin was raised up, letting the warm spray run over her body. Turning her neck she squinted at him from the corner of her eye, a small smile on her lips.

"What're you think you're doing?"

He grinned. "Our girl never showers in here with us. Had ta take the chance."

She blushed. "I was afraid if I used the other shower I wouldn't hear the timer on the stove. I didn't wake you, did I?"

"Nope, Conn’s nasty breath did."

"So mean to your brother."

Moving from her spot she pulled him under the water, soaping up her loofah to help wash him.

"I could get used ta this. Ye need any help with cleaning."

She shook her head. "No, but thank you. I’d just like to take care of you right now."

He reached out to her, pulling her against him; his hands slipping on her skin from all the water and leftover soap. "Ye do take care of us, Seraphine. Like ta take care of you too. So ye miss any spots? Behind the ears? Toes? Need someone to soap yer back?"

She giggled, her eyes twinkling. Not as brightly as they were in the photos but pretty damn close.

"I'm good. I beat you to it already."

"My luck wasn't as good as I thought then."

"I can still wash you though."

He didn't want her to think she had to but with some coaxing she did. The tender touches making his body limp, he hadn't been so relaxed in a good while.

"Y'know it's Christmas morning, lass, let's go open our presents. Noticed Santa left some under da tree."

That sparkle was still there but she shook her head. "Have to wait until Conn wakes up for that."

His mouth fell open. "Fuck that, I'll wake him."

He had gotten a pillow to toss at him when Sera stopped him. "No, come on and help me cook, Murph. He should wake soon."

He let out an exasperated grunt. "Don'tcha want ta know what ye got?"

"Yeah, but I also want to finish cooking. We have to lug it down to McGinty's by six. Claudette's taking care of the ham, and everyone's supposed to bring a dish. But I'm still behind. I haven't even started on the babka yet."

He flung the pillow back down and followed her into the makeshift kitchen. Since getting the stove the apartment had usually remained fragrant with the goodies she'd make.

"What's that?"

"Babka?"

He nodded.

"It's Challah but with raisins and nuts in it, kind of like a cinnamon roll. I think you'll like it. I finished the apple cake earlier. Doc told me his mom used to make it for him, and I thought it'd be kind of neat to have since for Rosh Hashanah it's tradition to make a honey and apple cake."

"Why was it a tradition?"

"Because both things are sweet…it's the Jewish New Year so sweet things to make a sweet year."

"Sounds like a good way ta start it."

"Yeah, my Nonni could make the best kind. Oh! And her rugelach! Best thing to ever go in your mouth."

He snuck behind her hands slipping around her waist. "I could think of something sweeter in my mouth, aingeal."

Kissing her thoroughly she pulled back flushed. "Keep being naughty like that and Santa's going to take back those gifts."

"I think ye like it love."

Rubbing her lips together the red went high in her cheeks. "I do. Very much so. How about I make us some pancakes and coffee while we wait for Connor? I put the beef on when I woke up, and wet it not too long ago. I peeled the potatoes for the colcannon. But I'll wait to put those on so the cabbage isn't too soggy."

Murphy was ahead of her, coffee percolating as he gathered up the mix. "Can't wait ta tell ma we had a taste of Ireland fer Christmas."

"You're going to call her before we leave aren't you?"

"Course, as soon as sleeping beauty gets up."

She laughed, as they went on to make breakfast. They were halfway through the meal and Connor still hadn't risen. Getting agitated Murphy started flicking pieces of pancake at his brother. Hitting him in the nose a few times, one syrupy piece clung to the side of his head.

"Da fuck?"

"Merry Christmas brother, get the hell up so I can open my presents."

Connor looked at him, anger and grogginess evident. His hair had flattened on one side as he blinked around him. "It's early."

"Is not, gotta eat and open presents before we call ma, then we got ta go ta Mass before we make our haul to McGinty's so get yer lazy ass up."

Connor grumbled, wiping the sticky mess off his face.

"Nollaig Shona, Conn."  **(Merry Christmas)**

"Nollaig Shona a thabhairt duit chomh maith, aingeal milis. Been a good girl during the year ain'tcha?"  **(Merry Christmas to you as well, sweet angel.)**

"I'm afraid you missed the chance for me to sit on your lap and tell you. Come and sit down and I'll fix you a plate."

"He can do it himself, Sera."

"I know, but I want to. Besides you two have presents to open."

"Ye got some here too."

Sera had poured Conn some coffee and was handing it to him before he even made his brain made him move towards the table. Murphy got up, snatching her arm and pulling her to the couch.

"I really wished you guys didn't get me anything."

"Yeah, but we wanted to, so come one and open one with us."

Going through the boxes he was amazed by the thought put into the presents. Him and Conn usually tossed each other a pack of cigarettes on Christmas, but Sera tried to get them something that they'd like to do or use. Besides the clothes, though he was thankful for them wasn't going to slow him down from tearing into the other gifts, he got a book about art from ancient to modern times, a new razor kit, and odd enough a bow and quivers when he turned to her she shrugged.

"I don't know. I saw it and it made me think of you. I almost bought the crossbow, but thought better of it and decided not to."

He chuckled. "A good thing, archery's for the Scots not the Irish."

"You never know, I think you'd be good at it."

Connor chortled then. "Hell aingeal, knowing him he'd end up putting his own damn eye out with the thing."

"Stick it up yer ass, Conn. Like ta know how well off you'd be with that martial arts shit she got ye."

He was able to see the smile fade from her face. "If you guys want, I have the receipts -"

"It's not like that, love, we like our gifts very much. We haveta mess with each other though. Wish ye hadn't spent so much money on us though."

"Like you said before, I wanted to. There's still one more to you both."

"We'll open that, if you'll open this one. Murph and me have been itchin' ta give it to ye."

Murphy's eyes went to the little box Connor held out. It wasn't exactly what he had wanted to get her, but they agreed this would be a good step for them. That it'd show what she meant to them.

"Oh, my God."

They both piped in. "Lord's name."

Was that good or bad? She looked like she was going to cry. "Do ye not like it?"

Her response was to hurdle towards them, trying to capture them both in her arms. Drawing back she swallowed deeply.

"It's incredible, I love it. Thank you."

"May I put it on ye, aingeal?"

She nodded and he wanted to hit his brother for thinking to ask before him. He saw the silvers and diamond shining as it was placed around her neck.

"It's the Triquetra, the Trinity knot. In Ireland it's s'pposed ta symbolize the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, but we thought that we can let it stand for, ye know, the three of us."

His thumb went to his mouth, chewing the cuticle as his eyes went away when his hand was tugged down replaced with her soft lips.

"Thank you, Murph. This means so much to me, everything."

She went to kiss Conn, getting rid of the remainder of his jitters by opening their last gift, a homebrewers kit. It made the two of them laugh, Sera's tinkling laughter chiming in with them. They had called their Ma, Murphy choking when she asked to speak to Sera. She was terrified herself shaking her head and pulling away until she was placated that their Ma couldn't come through the phone on her. She eased when they started talking, staying a tad self-conscious though their Ma swore to keep it tamed. He noticed, she made no promises for the next time. Sera poured another bottle of Guinness on the spiced beef putting the meat on low to simmer while they were out at Christmas Mass. Once over gathering everything to take to McGinty's. It had been a wonderful evening. Everyone having a good time, stuffed to the brim and laughed out, the three made their way towards the door when Claudette left Rocco's side to hold out an envelope.

"I nearly forgot to give this to you."

Sera's face contorted to meek confusion. "You didn't have to do that, Claudette."

The blonde blushed, shoulders rising up to her ears. "I-I didn't. It was dropped off at the school. With you gone, we had a last second call in before break to figure out what we should do with the art program. I was shredding some papers when I saw this in your inbox. It had your name on it, thought you'd want it."

Sera thanked her, hugging her one more time before they left.

"I'm afraid to open it."

But she did, tearing into the top of the envelope revealing a card. Opening he saw her eyes soften, a small amount of surprise and fear climbing in them.

"Who's it from, Sera?"

Her hand went to her mouth, voice broken. "Lilly."

She closed her eyes and he knew she was trying to calm herself. "It's bad, whatever this is. It's got to be bad."

She let them take the card, seeing neat handwriting marking out two sentences.

_I'll see you soon. Please don't do anything stupid until then._

Trying to decipher the words Murphy searched himself trying to figure out how bad this could all go.


	13. Why is Everything so Heavy?

**One of Three**

**Chapter 13 – Why is Everything so Heavy?**

**[Guys! I got a beta finally – actually I got two that offered, bleedingrose0688 and canadianjelly, they have both been amazing in putting up with me and giving me ideas and just making me want to finish this. So thank you so much you two for that. Here's hoping it doesn't take so long in the future.]**

“I’m telling you guys, there’s nothing.”

The boys were walking to McGinty’s with Rocco hoping after waiting for weeks to have something to go on to relay to Sera, only to come up empty, again.

Connor took a long puff of his cigarette before speaking. “There’s got ta be somethin’, Roc, doesn’t yer boss talk to the other crime leaders or somethin’?”

Rocco shrugged his shoulders, making his shaggy hair bounce in his face. “Yeah, they all keep on alert with each other. They’ll wage fuckin’ war if they breathe on another’s territory. Look, all I know is Papa Joe is hoping to get an alliance going with the Russian syndicate but as far as knowing what their hits or interests are I haven’t gotten anything. It’s not like I can probe too much or outright ask, you know? I learned early in this job you ask too many questions your answer’s going to be a bullet in the head.”

The image put a brick in Connor’s stomach, running his tongue over his teeth he was glad when his brother spoke.

“What about da note? Did ye recognize the handwriting? Think one of yer friends could’ve forged it?”

The letter Sera had gotten on Christmas had them both suspicious. Why wouldn’t her friend just call? There were payphones everywhere if the girl had been worried about being traced. So why a letter? It seemed too bizarre to be legit though their doubt had irked Sera a tad.

“We’ve written notes to each other since we were seven. I think I know my best friend’s handwriting.”

And she probably did, but someone who had trained themselves could copy anything. And it worried Connor as well as his brother that this was putting her guard down while putting theirs’ up – they had believed her long before this but now it was becoming real. So they were trying to keep her engaged, wanting to teach her how to fight better, moves where she could get out of someone’s grip if needed. The most fun was teaching her the Russian tongue, her mouth more than once unable to produce the right annunciation of the words. The slips making her curse, and stammer. Connor wished one of them knew the Fehnay better, only able to teach her a handful of phrases that people in the underworld would use.

“I’ve looked it over several times. It doesn’t look like anything one of the guys could do. It’s too feminine.”

“So it had to be a woman that wrote it?”

“That’s my guess.”

Connor looked at his twin, not fully convinced but knew they both could try and breathe easier. Coming up to the pub he stayed out with Rocco while Murphy went in.

“Man, I get it, you’re tryin’ to protect your girl. If I see or hear anything I’ll let you know. I’ll do what I can.”

Connor sighed, taking off his sunglasses. “We know, Roc. Murph and me have faith in ye with that. But workin’ with these people fer so long, what do ye think we should do?”

Rocco’s usual blithe features hardened, eyes unwavering. “I’ve heard things about the Russian scene, shit they’ve done up here’d make you sick, worse than what Papa Joe’s crew has done. I can’t say what to do for her brother – could be dead by now if they got him. But her, you want to keep her safe, you need to get her the fuck away from here.”

Connor swallowed, taking in the sage advice. The only place he could think to take Sera would be his home in Ireland. But there was no damn way she’d go without knowing about her brother. And he couldn’t place blame on her for that. But they would have to find some precautions they could take.

“Think a gun would help til we can figure shit out?”

“For starters, I know a guy that can set you up with what you need.”

He nodded, throwing the unfinished cigarette in the bucket Doc kept by the door before entering the bar. Sera was supposed to meet them here, and his heart pounded when it took a minute to find her. Shepherd helping her stand out from the increasing crowd, Murphy sat on the booth’s table beside her making weird faces and jiggling his rosary and Connor thought his brother had lost it until he saw the baby Sera was holding.

“Whatcha got there, lass?”

 She turned and smiled at him jostling the baby up and down as she greeted him. It couldn’t have been a few months old, eyes wide as Murphy tried to keep its attention, tiny hands clutching on Sera’s sleeve.

“This is Julie’s son, Adam. Adam this is Connor.”

He grinned taking the little hand to shake, the baby’s reflexes making him grasp back.

“Who’s Julie?”

Sera’s lips parted in disbelief. “Geez, Rocco, she’s like the only waitress Doc’s been able to keep for more than a week. Red hair, pretty, you kiss her cheek whenever she hands you a beer.”

“Oh, yeah, I knew that.”

Connor smirked at his friend. “Course ye did. He’s got too many girls on him now ta remember them all.”

“It ain’t like that.”

Connor could tell he was embarrassed now, Rocco’s tell of stroking his beard showing up.

“So what’s it like then?”

Murph was joining in on the teasing now, hearing that small lilt of enjoyment enter his voice.

“I can’t help I’m a nice guy, girls like that and shit. Doesn’t mean I’m doin’ anything. Hell I already got to put up with Donna at home, I can’t handle more.”

Sera shook her head. “Don’t pay any mind to them, Roc, Claudette knows you two are just friends. She’s just glad to have someone to talk to about things that the two of you seem to get. She said you helped her out the other night too.”

Rocco lip curled in a sneer. “Yeah, that piece of shit ex of hers came running on her lawn screaming at her. Glad to knock him on his ass.”

Sera chuckled. “She was glad too.”

Rocco grinned clapping his hands together. “I think it’s time to get ole Fuck Ass to get me a beer. I’ll be back.”

Connor watched his friend go up to the bar before turning back to his girl. “Ye have one yet, lass?”

She shook her head. “Didn’t think it was a good idea, you know, with my hands full and everything. I will when Julie gets back, she went with her mom to run an errand real quick.”

“You’re good with ‘im.”

The baby was content in her arms, gumming on his hand, while he eyed everything.

“The look suits her, doesn’t it brother?”

Connor turned to his twin, seeing the playfulness there, but with the soft smile he knew Murph was with him that it wasn’t a bad daydream for later on.

“I’d say it does, ye thinkin’ about havin’ one of those, love?”

Connor grinned, watching Sera sputter, free hand going to her throat. “I can’t say I ever really have. Would you like to hold him?”

Now it was his turn to be nervous. “I think I’ll pass, lad doesn’t want ta be smellin’ like meat.”

Her smile told him that it was fine, that she understood the same as he did with her sputtering. It was a fine thing to imagine but too soon and the wrong circumstances to consider. They all had time to learn and get over their nerves.

“I’ll take him.”

He wanted to smack Murph then, at ease with taking the small bundle and cradling him in his arms. But Connor laughed when he did, the baby’s face wrinkling up and ready to cry making Murphy look up in alarm.

“What’d I do? I couldn’t have hurt him, right?”

Sera went to him, adjusting the baby from his arms to let him lie on Murphy’s chest, the whimpering settling down.

“Julie says he’s about three months old, he’s still at the stage that he likes to hear a heartbeat and be snug up.”

Murphy looked proud of himself as he patted the wee one’s back, swaying back and forth.

Sera crossed her arms, a hint of color entering her cheeks. “I’d say that the look suits you as well, Murphy,” she pivoted back to him, pinching his face softly making him grin. “I’m sure it’ll look good on you too, Connor.”

“Thanks, aingeal.”

“How about I take Adam back and you two join Rocco? I invited Janine and Claudette here. I haven’t really talked to them since Christmas so I’ll wait on them to join in. Besides you both look like you could use a drink.”

Connor tried to appear offended.  “We look that much like shit?”

“No, but you seem tired…worried. Did something happen?”

He knew she wasn’t meaning work. That it was her asking if Roc found anything. “Nothing’s happened, grá aingeal. Roc’s working his way inta things and will keep tryin’ ta find something. We want ta be careful though.”

She nodded, solemn. “I know.”

“Thinkin’ we should show ye how ta use a gun.”

She snorted. “I know how to shoot, boys.”

Connor glanced at his brother who shrugged at him smiling, that was one thing they wouldn’t need to worry about then.

“That’s good, we were going ta look at some with Roc. Maybe start practicing.”

She chewed her lip. “If you want…he didn’t hear anything about…?”

His gaze softened, touching her cheek. “’Fraid not, Seraphine. But it’ll be all right. Sometimes no news is good news, aye?”

She nodded again, but he knew she wasn’t convinced. Letting his attention go back to his brother, paying mind to how Murph was reluctant to give up the baby.

“I got two hands, love, I won’t drop him or nothin’. ‘Sides he likes me.”

Connor was happy that a smile came back up to her face. The baby did give the impression of being happy enough in his twin’s hold.

“Fine, as long as you drop your beer before you drop him.”

“Ye have me word, lass. Come on, little lad, Uncle Murph will show ye the proper way ta poke some fun.”

Sera poked his side on the way to the bar. “You’re right, it is fun.”

“Watch it, love, have my hands free soon enough.”

Connor smiled at her giggle, lingering behind. “Having a girls’ night then?”

“I feel kind of bad for not keeping in touch with them lately, thought it’d be good way to take my mind off things too.”

“Ye should. Don’t help too much ta dwell on things, need ta keep your spirits up.”

“You do too. It’s been one of the things I’m afraid of with all this happening.”

He tilted his head, not able to figure out where she was hinting. “What do ye mean, love?”

Her smile was sad. “That you’ll change. That both of you will. You’re both light-hearted and happy, this…I want to shield you from the things that can happen. I don’t want either of you part of it.”

“Aingeal –“

“I don’t want you to resent me.”

He took her by the shoulders then, waiting until she made eye contact with him to speak.

“That ain’t ever gonna happen, Sera. It may take a while but this will be over, and we’ll still have each other, and the way we feel about one another. Nothing’s gonna change that.”

Her eyes flitted to the side. “Perhaps, but the way this is going. The things we may have to do. It could change you Conn. The things I’ve done, what Sapph’s had to do…we don’t see the world like we used to. I just want you both to be able to smile if you stay.”

“If  _you_ stay, that shouldn’t be a problem, lass. Ye see, Murph and me have big plans fer the three of us.”

Her body slackened, the stiff brooding gone. “Oh, yeah? Do I get to know what they are?”

Connor pulled her to him, kissing her forehead. “Ye will soon.”

He wished he could tell her how all this was going to end, how he wanted it to end, and with her pulling back to let her hazel eyes twinkle at him he nearly did. Perhaps due to luck baby Adam started to wail, drawing Sera’s attention away. Murphy had started bouncing him, hoping to quell the crying.

“I don’t know what happened, lass. We weren’t being loud or anythin’. He started movin’ around and then started ta cry.”

The sight before him put a wrench in the plans he had, watching Sera beside Murph as they tried to calm the little one down.

“How was he moving?”

On cue the baby’s head started moving, trying to find a place to suckle. Connor started laughing.

“He’s trying ta find a teat on ye! Must’ve known ye were too girly ta be a man. He’s a smart one.”

Murphy’s eyes flashed at him, Connor knowing he was riling him up. But the look Sera gave them made his next comment fizzle out.

“I think it has more to do with trust, Murph. He feels safe with you, so it’s only natural he’d think you’d feed him. Julie said he just ate, so maybe he wants a pacifier.”

Doc pulled a bag from behind his counter. “The l-l-lass left her t-things here, sure there’s something fer him in o-one of ‘em.”

There was one, thank the Lord above, fitting it in the boy’s mouth making the crying die out in an instant. Murphy was starting to cradle him again when Connor held his hands out.

“I’d like ta try and hold him.”

His brother snorted at him. “Thought ye said you smell too much like meat.”

“So do you, ye prick. I want…want ta see what the fuss is about, all right?”

The sharpness from Murphy’s eyes dulled, grasping what he was saying. Adam didn’t make up a fuss at being handed over, his eyes widening a bit as he was lifted away into Connor’s hands. Otherwise he was as content as he was before, now happy to be suckling his pacifier. It filled Connor with wonderment how something so small could be so powerful - not too long ago this child wasn’t in existence. But through a miraculous process here he was. Strong, yet fragile that the people around him were so careful not to hurt him. Helpless, but smart enough to cry to alert someone to his needs. It was an odd thing to see up close, even more bizarre that now, when it was time, he had the gift to make one as well. Taking his eyes off the child he glanced back to Sera while she clunk a glass against Murphy’s.

“L'Chayim.”

Connor smiled watching his brother try to mimic the word, and failing. She sat across from Murphy letting her mouth say it again in slow motion, making him snort when his brother decided to sneak a kiss instead.

“What does that mean, love?”

She smiled. “It’s basically Yiddish for cheers, it means ‘to life’ so cheers to life. How would you say cheers in Italian, Roc?”

“Hey, we know Italian too.”

“I know, but Rocco’s family is native there.”

Rocco grinned, pride welling up from mentioning his roots. “You’d raise your glass and say ‘alla salute.’ Or if we’re going with life here you can say ‘cento di questi giorni’ it means may you have a hundred of these days.”

Murphy clanked his glass with Roc’s before taking a swig. “I’ll say cheers ta that.”

“What about French? How would you say cheers then?”

It was directed at both of them but Sera was facing him. “Ye not gonna ask how ta say it in Irish?”

She shook her head. “I know how to say it in Irish.”

Murphy bumped her with his elbow then. “That so? How ye say it, I’ve forgotten, aingeal.”

She was trying to muffle her smile, though she indulged him. “Sláinte. It means ‘health.’ Now we’ve gotten to life of a hundred years with good health.”

She was about to take a sip when Murphy took her arm. “No, lass I need ye ta come back down and teach me da word again.”

She laughed bending back to stool level to try the word again, he let her say it, before moving in again. “Ye do good, love, but it sounds more like this –“

“Might cut ye off Murph, gettin’ too frisky with the girl.”

“Only had one drink, ‘sides, it’s all in good fun ain’t it, Sera?”

She nodded kissing his nose. “I’d say so. What about Russian, how would you say cheers then, Conn?”

“Ypa.”

“Ypa?”

He nodded, the word coming out of her mouth close to perfect.

“How come ye didn’t learn Russian, lass?”

“It was Sapph’s language, not mine.”

His brow creased. “How was it yer brother’s?”

“We all learned three of the same languages – Polish, Yiddish, and Spanish. Polish and Yiddish for our roots and Spanish because our mom thought we’d need it. But when we picked out which ones we wanted he picked Russian – he wanted all the languages that sounded tough, Selene wanted all the ones that sounded romantic, and they always dumped on me that I got the leftover ones.”

“But they weren’t.”

She shook her head, a coy smile coming upon her. “Nope.”

Murphy scoffed. “So what ye gonna keep us in suspense over it?”

The smile stayed on her. “It’s maybe a little bit of a downer is why, but I picked the languages I did because they were some to ally with the Jews during the Holocaust.”

“Oh.”

She chuckled. “That is exactly the sound my brother made when I told him. He liked to rub it in that him and Selene got the better languages then finding out when we were twelve he said – ‘Well, I feel like an ass.’ And I told him – ‘Yeah, you kind of are’. I had some idea of what my grandparents went through, though they never wanted to talk about it. And I didn’t blame them, from what mom would tell me. I just thought they were so strong, and the people that didn’t sit and do nothing were too. I wanted to be like them.”

She smiled at the memory before Rocco interjected. “So the Irish helped with that shit?”

“In 1937, the Irish government put in their constitution to specifically protect people of the Jewish faith, so I’d say it helped.”

“Italy helped too, you know.”

Sera hit Roc’s shoulder in a playful manner. “I know, but my sister got that one, romantic, remember?”

“You’re right on that, us Italians are more romantic than these leprechauns you got.”

He could see Murph aiming to hit Roc upside the head when Sera stopped him.

“I think the Irish are very romantic, to each their own, Roc.”

“Possa allora il tuo romanticismo essere eterno.”

Connor smirked. “Don’tcha worry on that Roc, it will be.”

“What’d he say?”

“May our romance be everlasting.”

“Awww, thank you, זאל איר געפֿינען די ליבע אַז איר פאַרדינען.”

“And what does that mean, honey?”

She hugged Rocco. “May you find the love you deserve.”

“Need all the help I can get with that.”

“What do we have here then? Never thought I’d see da day when a MacManus held a baby, let alone mine.”

Connor jumped, before realizing it was Julie returning, the petite redhead grinned at him putting a few bobby pins in her signature braids.

“Didn’t see the harm, fine boy ye got here, taken a liking to us. ‘Specially Murph, tried ta find a place to drink from and was disappointed to not find anythin’.”

“Shut it, Connor.”

Julie took her son, and he felt a bit disappointed at the empty spot in his arms.

“Sorry bout that, Murphy, means he likes ye I s’ppose.”

Murphy scratched his head, playing off his embarrassment. “He’s a good one, didn’t kick up too much of a fuss or anythin’.”

Julie grinned. “Thank you, and thank all of ye fer watchin’ him. I’m going to run him out ta my mother and I’ll be ready ta throw on my apron.”

“T-t-ake yer time, l-la – FUCK! ASS!”

Connor tried to show sympathy as the baby wailed from the yelled obscenities. Yet he couldn’t help but be amused by Doc’s timing. Saying goodbye to Adam, Connor got him a pint keeping his eye on Sera until her friends got there. He was being honest when he said she should keep her mind off things, she needed a distraction, and it was good for her to have it be something other than him and Murph. He hated to admit that, but knew it wasn’t healthy for her to have her attention all to themselves.

When the two women had gotten there, Janine, had leaned over the bar asking Doc for something, coming back with a few bottles and shot glasses. Watching as Sera gulped the liquid down with some hesitance. He smiled to himself, going back to drain his own glass.

“So what’re you two fucks planning on doing once you find her brother?”

 Connor looked into his glass.  “Don’t know fer sure, I mean, we both want to make an honorable woman outta her. Take her to our ma, set us up a home, but we’re tryin’ ta see what’s before us. We need ta find her brother ta see what our next move should be. If we truly should get out or if we should fight.”

“I hate to break it to the two of you, but there’s a snow cone’s chance in hell any of you are going to take out the Russian mob.”

Murphy piped in for him. “Don’t need ta take ‘em all out, just the fuckers who hurt Sera and her family.”

“You’re not even thinking of getting help either, are you? You seriously believe the two of you can do it by yourselves?”

Connor looked at his twin, his eyes holding him. The answer wasn’t that hard.

“If we get help then fine, but if we haveta, yeah, fer her we can do it.”

Rocco shook his head in disbelief. “Don’t want you two to get me wrong, she’s a great woman. But to put your lives on the line for one chick, hell thought it was crazy enough the two of you dating her.”

“Pretty obvious ye haven’t found the right girl, Roc. If Donna was the one you’d fight tooth and nail ta keep her safe.”

“Wouldn’t say I’d do that shit, not all of us can be knights in shining armor.”

Connor was brought back to the night at the restaurant, when Sera had said him and Murph were her white knights.

“I don’t know, Rocco, there’s a time when every person can be. Just takes a little motivation.”

“Whatever you say, Sir Galahad.”

Connor rubbed his lips together, hiding his grin, and was about to ask Doc for another beer when the doors were slammed open. He felt his posture straighten when his eyes focused on the men entering the pub. Three men built like the Leinster House came barging in to the bar, Connor kept his gaze steady watching as they rounded on Doc. The one that appeared to be in charge had begun removing his gloves slowly, before giving them a derisive smile.

“My name is Ivan Chekov, and I would like to speak to the man that owns this establishment.”

His appearance and accent told Connor he was Russian but it wasn’t until the clattering of glass from the direction at the girls’ table that he became alert.

“I-I own this place, now what’re ye people wantin’?”

Murphy already sensing the trouble brewing put his arms around Rocco. “Maybe they’re out lookin’ fer Spock for an away team.”

The men at the bar laughed, but Ivan and his companions stared coldly.

“Isn’t it amazing? A bunch of Irishmen drunk at a bar making complete asses of themselves. This is no time for jokes, mucker, this bar is closed until further notice.”

Someone in the crowd piped in. “Says who?”

A shared, “yeah,” went through the bar.

Ivan grinned, yellow teeth peeking past his lips. “My boss. We’re here for answers and we have all the time in the world to get them. But that might mean bad for your business, yes?”

Doc narrowed his eyes, magnified by his glasses. “And just w-what k-k-kind of answers ye want?”

Ivan reached into his overcoat, pulling out a picture. “We’re looking for this girl, and we know she’s been seen frequenting this bar. I need to know all you have in that drunkard head about her.”

Connor stood up from his seat beside the men, not needing to look at the photo to know it was Sera. Sliding his hand behind Roc’s neck like they were sharing a joke and he whispered to him.

“Ye get the girls and you slip the fuck outta here. Don’t make any noise or nothin’ go out the fire exit in da back and take them home. Murph and me will handle ‘em.”

Rocco looked like he was going to protest but the look on Connor’s face made him clam up, nodding as he tried to casually move out of his seat. Murphy got into the vacated seat beside him, bending over enough to stare at the picture before looking at the lumbering man.

“Aye, scorned love? Can tell ye me and him come in here every day, and we ain’t seen this one. Might do ye well ta let things go if she ain’t wantin’ ye. Kinda pathetic if ye ask me.”

“No one fucking asked you! You’re not part of this!” Ivan thrust his finger at Murphy’s chest. “So I want you, and all the rest of you Irish fucks out of here!”

Doc let out a strangled scoff. “Y-ye heard him, didn’t ye? None of us have s-seen the lass, now why don’t ye make like a tree and g-get the FUCK! ASS! out of here.”

“We know for a fact this girl was here, and we’re not leaving until you tell us what you know.”

“Oh, shit!”

Connor’s head swiveled behind him, his heart sinking at the sight of Sera on the floor her body jerking. She was having a fucking seizure. Turning back he saw the others with Ivan starting to look in that direction and tried to put it back on them before they could.

“I’m sure these fellas can be reasonable, not sure what a little thing like that could do ta strike yer interest but we can try ta sort it out fer ye. I can’t say I’ve seen her, perhaps she comes in early in da day when they open. Ye think, Doc?”

Doc pursed his lips, eyes softening at Connor before freezing back up. “I’m t-telling ye, boys, I’m here a-a-all day and haven’t seen the poor girl. Yer inform-m-mation must be wrong.”

“Girl’s a fucking murderer is what she is!”

Connor turned to the man behind Ivan, his pale face red from anger.

Without turning Ivan spoke over his shoulder. “Вам нужно держать голову черт или я буду иметь свой язык.”  **(You need to keep your head or I’ll have your tongue.)**

“Они вероятно друзей с сука, они не собираемся рассказать нам что-нибудь. Мы могли бы также осветить это место.”  **(They're probably friends with the bitch! They're not going to tell us anything. We might as well light this place up.)**

Connor looked at Murphy, his expression mirroring his, them both turning on the Russians. “Давайте будем здесь гражданами, господа. Нет необходимости в насилии. Почему бы вам не встать на место и стакан, и мы можем попытаться устранить эту дилемму.”  **(Let's be civil here, gentlemen. There's no need for violence. Why don't you three take a seat and a glass and we can try and clear this dilemma.)**

This crew obviously wasn’t expecting fluent Russian to come from any of the bar patrons, but as quick as astonishment came it left leaving Ivan snarling at him before nodding his head at the two behind him.

“I tell all of you to leave, you don’t, we make you leave.”

Going behind the bar the two men proceeded to bring down the shelves, leaving poor Doc stammering trying to clamor by and pull the men back only to be knocked aside causing him to fall to the floor.

Connor could feel his blood boiling. “Это было не чертовски приятно, не так ли?”  **(That wasn't fucking nice, now was it?)**

He could feel his brother’s rage as he came beside him curling his hands into fist. “Не думайте, что мы должны отпустить это, брат?”  **(Don't think we should let that go, should we brother?)**

The men turned to eye them as they clunk their shots together, slugging them back before proceeding to jump over the bar to attack them. All hell broke out then. Everybody who had been watching joined in, throwing punches or grabbing things to strike the Russians with. Before long the whole bar was demolished, but the three mobsters were taken down and unconscious. One Murph had taken with the wine bottles, another the patrons got a hold of knocking him out with a cue stick, and good ole Ivan was strapped down to the bar, starting to come out of his haze.

“The fuck?”

Connor bit down the filter of his cigarette, undoing the bottle of Hennessey. “Ah, good you’re awake there Ivan me boy. We didn’t want ye ta miss out. Ye see I think all here can say we have a soft spot fer Doc here, and coming in smashing the place, preying upon innocent girls, and Lord knows what else…well, we got ta take it upon ourselves ta teach ye a lesson now don’t we?”

Pouring the liquor over his ass and legs he stepped back to let Murphy in. “Care if I light him up, brother?”

Connor grinned. “Be a pleasure ta see.”

Murphy grinned taking a match, lighting his own cigarette before tossing it on the man. The moment it hit, Ivan threw his head back and yowled.

“Might consider a new profession, Ivan, you and yer crew seem to lack the finesse fer it.”

The bar laughed, Doc coming to the man’s aid and throwing a wet towel on him before smiling at them. “Don’t need ta be fuckin’ up the b-bar than it already i-is, fellas.”

Murphy smashed his cigarette on Ivan’s boot. “We’ll find a way ta fix everything, Doc, no worries. Fuckers needed ta be put in their places.”

Connor chuckled. “Sure they didn’t bet that it’d be some Irishmen ta do it.”

All the men helped to straighten up what they could, throwing the men out on their asses as they did. When all that could be repaired was done, the men set out. Connor and Murphy throwing on their coats, anxious to get home.

Connor nudged his brother. “Need ta find a long way ‘round. Make sure the stupid shits don’t follow us.”

Murphy nodded, steering them both around the corner taking the longer trail into town and back. When they were sure they were alone on the sidewalk they headed back.

“Ye think Roc got them home alright?”

Connor glanced at his brother, the streetlights flickering to life improving his vision.

“Yeah, believe he did. Hope he stuck around at the house though. Don’t know if ye saw or not but Sera went down at the bar. If my thinkin’ was right, she was havin’ a seizure on him.”

Murphy gaped at him, before his eyes narrowed. “And ye didn’t think ta mention that shit til now, did ye? Waitin’ fer us ta finish our stroll or somethin’? She could be fuckin’ dyin’ and yer yammering on –“

“Keep yer voice down, dammit. Ye know we had ta. Ye think those fuckers won’t be pissed when they come to? They’ll be up and taggin’ us by the end of the day tomorrow and that’s if we’re lucky.”

He saw Murphy stick his thumb between his teeth. “We need ta get those guns.”

Connor nodded in agreement. “Roc said he knew a guy, if he’s there then we’ll ask if we can go tonight.”

Murphy tapped his lips with his thumb, his face turning conflicted. “What about Sera? Can’t just leave her there by herself.”

Connor could tell his brother wanted their girl safe but he also wanted to go see the guns. It was like telling a kid he couldn’t go to the toy store. So he shrugged with a smile.

“Figured you could go with Rocco, rather stay behind anyways. Nurse my wounds and all that.”

Which was true his ribs were a bit bruised from the scuffle, his shoulders tense and sore from the strain of the fight; his brother probably earned some as well, but knowing Murph, his excitement outweighed the pain.

Murphy looked relieved. “Aye, a lot’s happened tonight.”

“And we have a long way ta go before dawn, so let’s get on home. Don’t know about ye, but I could use a fuckin’ beer.”

“I’ll agree ta that.”

It was a comfortable walk, trying to hurry back, but keeping themselves perked up by recanting the events that happened, both of them already exaggerating the details making them both chuckle. Getting in and climbing out of the lift, they were reassured when they saw Roc waiting by the banister puffing on a cigarette as he watched them get out.

“Any of you dumb fucks get arrested?”

Murphy scoffed, Connor snorting along with him. “Ye know no one’s gonna call da cops down there, Roc.”

He nodded to them, inhaling the smoke again. “Everything work out then?”

“As well as it could. Taught them a lesson, don’t know if they’ll come back on it yet…How about here, everything okay on yer end?”

Rocco sighed. “Took forever to get out of there, that crazy Goth chick wanted to stay, you know, to see what happen. I got her and Claudette to move, then Sera froze up. Pulled on her arm to get her and she fell to the fucking floor, her nose started bleeding; then she started jerking. It scared the living hell out of me.”

“She was havin’ a seizure.”

“The girls told me she was epileptic when we got out, I thought she was fucking dying on me. But she quit when we got down the road, wanted to take her to the emergency room once we dropped the girls off she still looked so out of it but she wouldn’t have it. Brought her back here and we hung out until she passed out from the pills she took.”

Connor looked into their darkened home, the light filtering from outside through the windows letting him see her and Shep nestled next to each other on the bed. Rolling his eyes when he turned back to see Murph had stolen their friend’s lighter out of his pocket.

“Was she okay while she was up? Wasn’t too disoriented or anything?”

Roc took a minute to answer, realizing his lighter had been pilfered and trying to get it back from the dark haired twin who was holding it out of his reach. Connor kicked his brother in the shin before handing the item back to Rocco.

He whispered harshly. “Ye need ta quit fuckin’ around, too much shit’s happened.”

Murphy rubbed his leg, scowling. “I am serious, ye fuckin’ ass, nothin’ wrong with lightening up the moment.”

“As soon as we were alone in the car she wanted to go back for you two, figured you’d be pissed off if I did that.”

The two both grumbled in agreement.

“So she opted in trying to stay awake and wait for you. She kept looking over at the clock and getting worried, so I got her talking. Seemed to help her, got her to eat something, and she asked if she could draw me when the pills started kicking in and she started nodding. She asked me to keep talking to her, and I did til she dropped off not too long ago.”

Connor pursed his lips. “Thanks fer doin’ that, Roc. Know she had ta be scared, good ta know ye were there ta ease her mind.”

Murphy nodded. “Aye…so she drew yer ugly ass?”

Rocco grinned. “Yeah, she did, was doing a good fucking job too, but she was getting too tired to finish it. She said I could have it if I wanted it, going to, might have it framed. Didn’t even know she could draw.”

Murphy gave an exasperated sigh. “She was an art teacher, the fuck ye think she did?”

Rocco shrugged. “You can be a teacher and not have any specialty in the field. But she’s talented, she told me she got it from her aunt and grandmother we both kept talking about our families…I’m going to go back out and try to find some leads for her before I head home. I have a few people I can call up, see what they know about her brother.”

Connor simpered on that. “Did yer slumber party get ta ye, Roc?”

“Maybe it did, if you fellas are done I’ll be heading out.”

Murphy stopped him. “Whoa, wait a second there, we do have a favor ta ask of ye.”

“Of course you do. You know you both would be fucked without me.”

“Yeah, yeah, ye think the man that has those weapons would meet us tonight?”

“Probably. I can call him while I’m out, you gotta have cash though.”

Connor waved him off, going quietly inside to grab their rainy day cash from behind the refrigerator before coming back out. “We got it covered, just take Murph with you, and help find something fer us and da lass. She says she knows how ta shoot so there’s no need ta worry on that.”

Rocco thumbed through the envelope and nodded. “He’ll set you up. Kick his ass otherwise.”

“Ye both just be careful and hurry back.”

Murphy nudged him. “Ye think we should get a knife?”

“The fuck fer?”

“In case we need ta be stealthy ‘bout shit.”

“Just get da guns fer now, Christ’s sake.”

Murphy startled at the tone, mumbling while he went to the lift. “Lord’s name.”

Connor crossed himself, nodding his goodbye to them. Locking eyes with Murphy he smirked before shaking his head and going inside. He loved his brother, but sometimes the shit he thought of was stupid as hell. He got his beer and headed for the couch, letting Sera and Shep have the bed while he got lost in his thoughts.

He wondered how much the trauma had changed her, if it could change them, then thinking of all the times him and Murphy went to Mass and heard of another poor soul reaped before their time for someone else’s gain – it seemed right to be defensive. If the life of an evil person had to be taken to preserve someone that was good, shouldn’t it be right to do so? It was the exact definition of self-defense wasn’t it? He couldn’t help but watch her in the glow of the night, she had told them she knew how their mother had to feel when watching them sleep, looking so innocent but knowing better. It was easy for him to understand right now, her face devoid of any worry as she slept, at peace within herself. Shep lying next to her near nose to nose, it was a fine picture.

It made him think of what her life could have been like before this, before them. She had admitted to sharing a room with her sister, throughout childhood. When they went to college their brother went to one away from home, the two girls on the same campus but trying to live apart. But the two were unable to make it more than a few months before purchasing an apartment with her and her friend to split the rent. Eventually even their brother hadn’t cared for the solitude giving their mother the opportunity to get her children home. He couldn’t help but wonder how they fit together. Was one messy, one clean? Had they worn each other’s clothes? Stayed awake until the other was home from a night out? Would the three of them stayed together? Connor knew they were close, all three of them, just as he was with Murph. But there were tells about her that made him know their lives were different from each other. He knew that her family was well to do. Not very much by possessions, but in the way she talked, the way she held herself. It wasn’t just pride; hell the MacManus’ had plenty of that. It had been something taught to her. They might not have had a vast of wealth, but they had lived in comfort. She had told them both that her parents grew up very poor home, the two coming from families of new immigrants. They had strived to learn everything, eventually meeting in college and pledging to give their children all they could. The same as their parents had but under new circumstances, a new world.

His own mother hadn’t been able to do that. Of course she gave him and Murphy what she could, but she hadn’t had the money or the time to go to college. Barely out of high school when she fell for their father, getting her pregnant with them and leaving when they were just out of diapers. They hadn’t had grandparents to help already passed on before they had been born. Sure, Ma’s sister had helped all she could but she had a brood of her own to deal with. But that left the bulk to neighborhood friends and Uncle Sibeal to take some of the stress off their Ma. He was a God send to her, giving them the male influence they needed and small insight of what their father must’ve been like. He’d take them to the Anvil and let them loose in the bar throwing more peanut shells on the floor than they were eating. Both him and Ma were the ones to educate them to the Bible, with Ma giving them the paddle and their uncle being a priest it was hard to be out of line, though the two always found a way.

Connor chuckled, raising his eyes back to Sera hearing her sigh as she burrowed deeper into the pillows. Would her parents have accepted them? Their relationship wasn’t conventional, and being different faiths and poor as hell to boot he could never be a hundred percent sure. She said they would’ve, her mother and sister being the ones to embrace them first making them promise to let her keep her beliefs. After that it’d take some coaxing with her dad and brother, but they would come around. It was the way things were, fathers and daughters – mothers and sons. She said that’s why she was terrified meeting their Ma. It was the point of being seen as taking them away, and not wanting to give back. But if they were happy, that would be enough, right?

Again, he didn’t know. Love didn’t keep everything afloat, the perfect example being their poor Ma. What if down the line Sera finally saw they couldn’t give her what she needed? Him and his brother were used to living a certain way and didn’t need fancy outings or things to make them happy. But would she? He mentally slapped himself for thinking that, but, then again, didn’t all women want nice things? Could the two of them be enough? He lay out on the couch, staring at the ceiling wishing he had gone instead of Murphy. He didn’t like being stuck here with these fucking doubts. He sunk into the cushions, gritting his teeth while his muscles finally caught up to the events of the day and gave out. They loved each other and that’s all they needed, after all the shit had been dealt with they’d figure out things down the road. Letting his eyes shut he soon fell asleep.

_He didn’t know why he was here. But no one paid mind to him while he made his way down the corridor, walking past people in their stiff suits to go down to the uproar on the floor below. Peering around he took in the metal detectors, policemen guarding the entrances while people from the outside held cameras and microphones out to the men at the bottom of the steps, all of them crowding together like sardines in a can. Connor decided to take a different turn not ready to hear the commotion, ambling in the hallways he saw people through the glass walls working at their desks. One of them getting up and coming out at him._

_“Sir! Mr. Hamilton!”_

_The man that came out spun around, smiling at who called his name; turning himself, Connor’s eyes grew recognizing the girl from all the pictures he and his brother had flipped through. The girl with light brown copper hair, her frame smaller but near to identical to their Seraphine._

_“Miss Morgenstern, I thought you’d be out there greeting your fans.”_

_Morgenstern?_

_Little Selene appeared much meeker to him than Sera had described, face turning downwards with a hesistant smile while she picked at the sleeve of her dress._

_“No, sir, I think I need help. I need my brother, have you seen him?”_

_Hamilton’s forehead wrinkled. “I’m afraid not, I think he’s down feeding the circus. Is there something I can help you with?”_

_Her mouth gaped, trying to find the words. “I think something’s going to happen, I heard it. I just – please I think we need police to comb the area. The man had a gun and –“_

_The man raised his hands in an appeasing manner. “Let’s calm down for a second, what man?”_

_Selene huffed, starting to back away. “I don’t know what man, I don’t know him. But I think he’s a sniper.”_

_Hamilton’s brows went up. “A sniper? Jesus, I’m going to alert someone now, okay? Maybe you can sit in my office until –“_

_“No! I need to find my brother and sister.”_

_“I’m sure your brother is speaking to the press and your sister went out with one of the agents not too long ago.”_

_Her demeanor changed, more alert, posture straightened. “When did she go out? With who?”_

_“It was one of the newer agents on your case, Bloom I think…Miss Morgenstern?”_

_Selene was trekking backwards ready to bolt. “Just call them please. I have to find my family.”_

_Sprinting as fast as she could Connor followed behind her downstairs and past the news crews to the front steps. Swiveling about until she found who she was searching for._

_“Sera!”_

_Looking in that direction he saw her too, talking to a red headed woman, facing them when she heard her name. Sera’s face lit up, saying something to the woman before waving, and heading up to her sister. Selene was trying to keep composure, as she rushed to her sister. Sera embracing her when she approached, pushing aside her nerves Selene hugged back. Connor seeing Sera whispering to her went closer to hear._

_“We’re free,_ _מיין_ _שוועסטער_ _ליבע.”_

_He didn’t know what it meant but could tell from the loving smile and the way she stroked her sister’s hair that it was an endearment. Selene started shaking her head in Sera’s neck, and he was able to tell she was crying._

_He heard her sniffle before replying. “We are,_ _נשמה_ _זיך. We will be.”_

_Pulling away, Selene glanced around her before looking at her watch as she choked out a laugh. She began to pivot them around the steps._

_“He was right. I told you He would be. He’s always right.”_

_Sera smiled, her face riddled in confusion. “Who are you talking about, Len? Who’s right?”_

_With that a bang and a ringing sounded, having everything follow at a fast pace. He watched Sera fall apart, seeing the life drain from her sister’s body refusing to leave her side, repeating the same thing over and over._

_“_ _וועקן_ _אַרויף,_ _ביטע_ _וועקן_ _אַרויף!”_

_Connor didn’t have to understand the language to know what she was uttering. The way Sera rocked her sister’s body back and forth, every now and again stopping to shake her. He realized she was trying to get her to wake up. She stayed like that until the other part of the photo came, the person Sera had been seeking, her brother having to grasp her tightly to pull her from their sister. The sorrowful scream that emitted broke him, ambulances arriving and having to sedate her. Sapph sat her on the back of one of them while wrapping her in a blanket to talk to one of the officers. Soon applause came when a man in handcuffs ended being hauled into one of the police cruisers. But Sera didn’t flinch, not even when her brother came back handing off a purse to Sera. Her hands came out to clasp the leather bag. Connor couldn’t help but take note of it, it was a familiar bag, and he realized it was the one Sera always carried._

_“She must have left it in one of the agents’ car.”_

_Sera’s body began to tremble. “Is it true?”_

_Her brother was startled. “What?”_

_“They caught him, but they’re going to have to let him go.”_

_“Who the fuck said that?”_

_A shaking hand pointed out to a cluster of police and reporters. “Diplomatic immunity, they said.”_

_“Bullshit! That’s bullshit, Sera! He’ll pay, he – he…what he did, he’ll be punished for it. I promise you. Okay?”_

_“Mr. Morgenstern?”_

_Sapph’s eyes flared, spinning in rage on the voice. “What?”_

_It was the agent that Sera had talked to. “We need a statement. We’ll make it quick, so you and your sister can go to the hospital together.”_

_He clutched Sera’s hand. “I’ll be right back, okay?”_

_Connor could tell she didn’t want him to, but let go. After several minutes she held the purse closer to her, sniffling before opening the bag. Her smile was wistful trying to hold in tears, just full of dejection as she went through the contents. Then she paused. The foggy glaze cleared from her eyes. Pushing her hair back she looked around her before hopping out of the ambulance. Putting the bag on her uninjured shoulder she was nervous, trying to play it down, holding her head up. She weaved her way past, no one paying mind to her as all the reporters were being occupied with the police and other witnesses of the event. Heading to the front of the courthouse she stood beside one of the cruiser, putting her hand in the bag before wrenching the door open.  He saw her hold her breath, bag falling to the ground he could hear people shouting at her when she pulled out a small pistol. Hers eyes welled, finger pulling the trigger._

His eyes snapped and he began flailing when something wet touched his face, stopping when he felt soft hands on him.

“Sssh, you’re okay. Everything’s fine.”

He leaned his head up, the room remaining dark. “Fuck. What happened?”

It was a rag, he realized, Sera wiping the cool cloth over his brow. “You were having a nightmare. You started to scream and I thought this would calm you. Might’ve made it worse, huh?”

Hearing the voice that had been so broken and in pieces moments before left him wounded, turning himself into her arms.

“Can we turn the light on lass? I need ta see you.”

She didn’t ask questions, shifting around to switch the light on. He gazed at her, hair rumpled from sleep, only in some shorts and one of their shirts they had thrown somewhere and forgot about. He sighed, tautness leaving him as the nightmare faded. She continued to stroke his hair, and he let himself lean into her palm. Connor wrapped his arms around her middle while he pushed his nose to her stomach, inhaling her scent that had combined with theirs. He didn’t like being coddled, more accurate, he didn’t like others to think he liked it. He always hassled Murphy about it, constantly wanting to be babied by Sera just as he had with their Ma, but now the shoe was on him and he couldn’t pull back. He needed this. He didn’t know what that was, what just happened. But it was plain that it was as if he got to live the worst day of Sera’s life. Every sense, every thought one of the girls had, he saw it. Seeing a sister give up her life for another, said sister taking a life in retribution – he just didn’t know why he got to see it. The first thought was how linked they had become with Seraphine, but that couldn’t explain it…not when he had seen it through her sister’s perspective. So what was it? Divine intervention? But why would the Lord need to give them this information? To know Sera had hurt? That she had killed? That Selene had tried to prevent it? Thinking was getting him nowhere tonight; instead he gave up for the moment. Deciding to deluge the information to his brother when he was back, two heads were better than one, right? So he tried to let the dream go.

His breath was returning to normal, closing his eyes as he nestled closer, hearing Sera hum as she kissed his hair. She understood, hell she did in every possible way, but she had her nightmares and knew he didn’t want to talk about it. He thanked her for that, especially since he had no idea how the hell he’d explain it to her. And definitely didn’t want to bring that sadness back to her. He began pulling her shirt up, reveling in the Triquetra that she now kept around her neck before kissing each mark on her. The knife wounds, the gunshot from the first break in, the one he hadn’t pressed about – pulling the shirt over her head without a word he looked at her, small smile on her face as he went down and tenderly kissed the mark he had just witnessed; going back to kiss behind her ear, and then her lips. Caressing her face he inhaled.

“Will ye tell me somethin’?”

She leaned into his touch. “Anything I can.”

“Is Shafir your real last name, love?”

She froze for a second before answering. “Well, no, does that…is that bad?”

He shook his head fast. “No, no, I’m curious.”

She let out a slight laugh. “I’ve used it all these months. I kind of forgot it wasn’t.”

“What was it? Yer real one?”

Her eyes held disbelief for a moment. “Oh, um, Morgenstern.”

“Morgenstern.” Like his dream.

“I know what you’re thinking. ‘I didn’t think she couldn’t get any more Jewish until this moment’, right?”

He looked back to her, and was able to chuckle. “Ye might be, aingeal. What made ye choose the name Shafir then?”

She kept touching him, thumbs going in soft circles on his neck. “It’s Hebrew for Sapphire. I – he wasn’t with me in person, so I thought it was a way to keep him with me.”

He nodded, going back to settle his head on her chest.

“May I ask what brought the question on? How’d you think to ask -”

He wasn’t going to lie about it. “It was in the nightmare I had.”

He noticed she didn’t tell him how bizarre that was “Oh. Does it bother you? I wasn’t trying to keep it from you I just –“

He pulled her wrist to him, kissing it. “No, love, want ta know everything I can about ye. And with what went on, seemed like the appropriate thing ta do. ”

“It made me feel safe in a way. Maybe I should go back since it doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Ye could, or ye could try MacManus on fer size.”

He smiled at her stunned expression. “What, not Jewish enough fer ye?”

She blushed, smiling. “It’s not that…I just…I can’t believe you said that.”

He grinned. “Can’t take it back now, but ye could always give an answer.”

He could feel so much in the kiss she gave him, the hairs on his arms standing up when she pulled away.

“How about you ask it again when this is over? That way I know you’re serious and not caught up in the heat of the action. Because I’m very much hoping for less excitement in the future.”

He stood up on his knees, keeping her legs locked in between his. “I am serious, love, won’t be changin’ me mind. Neither of us are. Gonna make sure yer never sad, never hurt, ever again.”

Her eyes misted. “Connor, what did you see –“

“Not tanight, grá aingeal. Ask me anythin’ else.”

She looked down at herself, hands skimming her arms and he knew she was becoming self-conscious by her lack of dress. He had drawn attention to her scars, her nudity on top to that making her feel raw and vulnerable.  _The way she must have felt that day._ He pulled her to him, moving so she was lying on him. Wanting to take both their minds away from the darkness he decided to distract her with his own scars.

He traced his finger over the raised edge of his left eyebrow. “Ye want ta know how I got this?”

Her finger followed his over the old abrasion. “I have been curious about it.”

“Ye can be blaming yer other ass of a man fer it.”

She laughed. “Now, why would Murphy do that?”

He snuggled her closer, glad to be going somewhere else. “We were kids, raking leaves in da yard fer some extra money. We finish up and wanted ta jump in ‘em before we had ta bag it all up. Murph gets da idea we should get on da shed ta do it. I couldn’t let him do it without me, he’d be holdin’ it over me head fer years if I did. So I go up there with him, but seein’ how high it was I was goin’ ta climb down. Except Murphy decides he’s going ta push my ass off the damn roof.”

She smiled, her eyes flashing amusement and skepticism. “No.”

Connor was getting into the story now, body gesturing in each part. “He did! My own fuckin’ brother pushes me off a roof, and what we didn’t know was under the damn pile was a fuckin’ rock and my face ends up hittin’ it. I come up with a headache and a gash on me that’s bleeding like crazy.” He started laughing. “Murphy starts panickin’, thinking he’s killed me, screaming his lungs out til Ma comes hollering out of the house. She patches me up and takes a switch to Murph’s backside fer doing it. I start ta feel bad so I end up tellin’ her it was my idea. I ended up with a headache, a scar, and a sore ass all in one day because of me dear brother.”

He smiled when she brought his face down to kiss the scar. “Poor Connor, I’m sure he didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Maybe not ta break open me head, but he sure as hell meant ta push me off da roof. I beat his ass fer it a few days later.”

“Regardless, you’re both good brothers. Hearing things like that, I think you’re especially protective.”

“Course I am, I’m the oldest.”

“Like shit ye are.”

They both faced the doorway, Murphy holding a few paper bags in his arms. Connor could see and smell that his brother must’ve gotten shitfaced with their friend. Making him wonder what the hell they’ve been doing this whole time.

“What ye actually believe in that head of yers that ye could be da oldest?”

“I fuckin’ know I am, ye dick!”

“Yeah, that’s right, me dick! Lass will tell ye it’s bigger meaning I’m da oldest.”

Sera started coughing, face red as she went to reach for the discarded shirt.

“See she knows ye ain’t. Tell him love, he’s gotta tiny pecker.”

She scooped the shirt over her, shaking her head when it popped through. “I’m not saying that at all.”

“See!”

“No, she’s being nice to yer little cock!”

“You both stop!”

She was laughing, waving them off. Murphy went to her, grabbing her up before she could lay back down with Shep.

“I don’t think ye want me to, aingeal. Roc and me got ye a surprise.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, all ye gotta say is I’m bigger and I’ll hand it over.”

“No! You’re both the same okay.”

“Ain’t no way in that.”

“Well…tell me I’m fat.”

Murphy brow shot up. “What?”

“Yep, tell me I’m fat and I’ll say who’s bigger.”

Connor grinned. “Yer fat, love.”

She pointed at him, grin growing. “You’re lying. What does it matter, I like both of them equally.”

Murphy started tickling her. “Like?”

“Love! I mean I love them! Dammit, how’d we go from talking about you two as little boys to talking about your junk?”

“Cause Murph’s the same size today as he was then, keep up, Sera.”

“Fuck off!”

Connor laughed settling on the couch. “What surprise ye got the lass?”

Murphy’s eyes brightened then starting to dig through his coat pockets with one hand, setting Sera on the bed with the other. Falling on it beside her he continued stuffing his hands but this time inside his jeans.

“Fuck sake, Murph what did hell ye go after?”

“Shut it, Conn, bring da phone over here.”

Being too tired to argue he did as asked, throwing the large cordless on the bed. He was about to lie back on the couch when Sera’s hand stopped him. She didn’t say anything at first, taking the time to interlace their hands together.

“You okay?”

“I’m fine, aingeal.”

She nodded, but he could tell by the look she held that she didn’t believe him.

Murphy barked a laugh when he pulled a scrap of paper out of his pocket. “Here we go, lass. Give these people a ring, when they answer ask fer someone named Sunburn.”

Sera flipped the paper over, studying, looking over at Murphy uncertain. “Why?”

  
“Trust me, love. Just give ‘em a call.”

She scooted closer to Murphy, and Connor could tell she was nervous of what this could bring at such a late hour but she dialed the number given, holding the receiver up to her ear in anticipation.

“Hello?”

Her eyes kept darting between the two of them, saying the name she was given and waiting. Neither him nor her knowing what it was leading to. A few minutes and she let loose the lip she had been biting, her mouth falling open and her eyes becoming much more awake as they locked on his. The green-brown eyes welling up with tears, letting her hand cover her mouth.

“Hi.” Her voice croaked it out, her body frozen in shock.

She started to cry Murphy beating him in putting an arm around her.

“I was so scared. I-I thought something happened to you. Are you okay?”

Connor’s eyes flicked to his brother, Murphy smirking in triumph. They had done it, Rocco finding her brother somehow. Her breathing was becoming spastic and he went to rub her back, hoping it was the tears and not another seizure happening so soon. They went back and forth for a while, a smile coming through the tears. When her eyes started to dry the smile slowly fell, a quiet ‘yes’ coming from her.

“I don’t see why that matters –“

“You should be able to tell that from them helping me find you –“

“I shouldn’t have to explain –“

“Yes. Yes! They know everything. I’m not going to lie or cover it up Sapph. It doesn’t matter anymore! If you must know I’m with them both and it doesn’t –“

Connor felt himself growing angry, her tears of happiness now coming back bitter. Out of all the things her brother could say he was asking about them, his sister’s fucking love life. Watching Sera about to break at her brother’s words he snatched the phone out of her hand before she could react.

“Who the hell ye think you are, boy? Yer sister’s been fuckin’ worried sick about ye, doin’ all she could ta find out where ye are and when she finally finds yer ass you berate her? The fuck’s wrong with ye?”

A low hiss was on the other end. “You need to watch your mouth and tone, _boy._ I don’t have to explain anything to anyone. Let alone one of the guys taking advantage of my sister.”

Connor scowled. “I don’t know where da fuck ye got yer information, but no one’s takin’ advantage of anyone. Me and my brother care fer yer sister a great deal, and fer some reason she puts up with us. And we’re gonna keep on with the arrangement until she’s sick of us. Now why don’t we all make nice and get yer ass down here fer us ta figure this shit out.”

He could hear a huff of annoyance on the line. “I don’t know what all my sister’s told you, but I think you should have the common sense to know that it’s more complicated than that.”

“Not really. The scuffle may end messy but gettin’ together is the easy part of this. Yer sister’s fuckin’ hurtin’, has been since ye left her. And she doesn’t need ta be on her own through this, she needs family.”

“She’s alive, isn’t she? That’s the end goal of all of this, nothing else matters.”

“Alive in the fact that she’s still breathin’. But there’s more to it than that, and ye know it. What she needs right now isn’t somethin’ me and my brother can give, though the Lord knows we’ll keep tryin’. She needs you. And you need her. Ye need ta come here, Sapphire.”

There was a long pause on the other end. “Tell my sister I’ll contact her within the week, and that I love her.”

With that the line went dead, Connor feeling guilty when the dial tone came on.

 


	14. When Irish Eyes are Smiling

**One of Three**  
**Chapter 14 – When Irish Eyes are Smiling**

Sera was in the between of waking and letting herself drift back to sleep, but the sudden draft of cold against her side pushed her brain to open her eyes. Turning over she saw one of her bed warmers sitting up.

“Conn?”

Her voice sounded like a dying frog and she cringed at it. Connor smiled over his shoulder at her, throwing on his socks and shirt.

“Go back ta sleep, Aingeal.”

She went to grab his arm. “I will if you lay back down, it’s cold without you.”

He leaned down and kissed her. “Ye got ole Murph fer that. Get some rest.”

**Gif by WiffleGifs**

She tried not to but she sulked. “Where are you going this early? The sun hasn’t come up yet.”

“Gotta head ta work, love, thought best fer one of us ta stay here withcha after what happened.”

She was sitting up with him now, careful to not jostle Murphy. “But then you’ll be alone. It’s not safe for you two either right now.”

“I’ll be fine, got a gun on me. It’ll be okay. Believe me, I’ll be perceptive, but we can’t be goin’ and throwing all our routines out da window. Can’t let them win on that.”

She bit her lip. “You’re right. You shouldn’t have to stop your lives. I feel bad you’ve had to do that, and I’m sorry about yesterday –“

He raised his hand to silence her. “There’s nothing ta be apologizing fer. Those assholes needed ta be taught a lesson. Would do it again in a second if need be. Besides, it should be me apologizin’. All that shit last night. ‘m sorry fer what I did, I’ll do what I can ta find yer brother so ye can talk to him again.”

She took his hand. “Connor there’s nothing for you to say sorry for in that either. You stood up for me when I couldn’t for myself. I don’t know what’s crawled up my brother’s ass - to stay gone that long and the first thing to pop out of his mouth is why I’m staying here…it’s not his business. I don’t like that you’re a part of this, but you are now, and whether Sapph likes it or not we’re going to have each others’ backs.”

“If da time comes, yer damn right we will.”

She wanted to say that the time would happen. But she stopped, not wanting to wake Murphy by causing a scene this early in the morning. Connor was right. They couldn’t drop everything because they were afraid. That would be surrendering. And she believed he could take care of himself if the situation arose.

“The very least I should be thanking you.”

His brows rose and her smile grew. “Fer what?”

“For defending me, of course. Rocco told me you’re the one to make him get us out of there. But…it’s more than that too. It’s for everything, Connor, you – the both of you…I know I bring it up a lot but you two could’ve walked away. As soon as I told you about me you could’ve thrown your hands up and said ‘fuck it’ but you didn’t. For some reason you let me stay and you both stay with me. Thank you for all that, for so much I can’t even list right now.”

He had closed his eyes while she spoke, opening them when she finished and went to stroke his stubbly cheek.

“Ye ain’t gotta thank either of us fer that, ár Aingeal grámhara. Yer ours, we love ye, it’s what we are meant ta do fer ye.”

He ushered her back to the mattress, her body abiding by its disrupted sleep. “Feel like I should thank someone…Maybe we could go to church or temple. I should thank Him, at least, right?”

Connor grinned. “Be a good idea, love, we enjoy it when ye go with us ta Mass.”

She hummed. “I like it too. Do you want me to make you some breakfast?”

“No need fer that. Know how ta make some toast, grab me a coffee on da way. Go back ta sleep, Sera, yer body needs ta rest. We want ye well.”

She mumbled out an ‘I’m fine,’ before her body gave in, feeling Connor’s lips on her forehead before she went to sleep. When she roused again, her whole body had chilled, opening her eyes she was alone,  
Murphy and Shep gone, his sheets rumpled and cold telling her he left a good time ago.

“Shep?”

Though the boys had ruined him, feeding him food off their plates and letting him all over the furniture, he remained wired that he sticks to her, knowing she needed him. Upon hearing his name Shep came darting from the stairway, and she felt bad having him used to that being his living area. He used to always be with her and with the intervals where she needed to be alone – well, she felt like he had been ignored. But if he had anything against her about it, it didn’t show, staying her sweet jovial dog.

“Where’s Murph, boy?”

His ears went like satellite dishes, going sideways and back at the name before giving a small bark as he went back out the door. Following he led her to the steps that went to the roof, making her hesitate. She hadn’t gone out there yet. To her, it was their equivalent of a man cave since they had let her move in. With her things clamored everywhere, the roof was the only place she hadn’t went and touched. Shep kept nudging the door with his nose, whining.

“I know, good job boy. Don’t know if we should bother him.”

Maybe she could just peek out, make sure he was okay. Cracking the door she saw him near the edge, cigarette smoke mingling with the crisp air. He appeared alright, pensive, lost in his own world, but unharmed so she started to back up without him knowing Shep opposing that choice and winding past her legs to trot to him. She saw Murphy chuckle when the dog sat by his legs, reaching down to rub Shep’s head, turning he glanced to her from his spot his smile becoming larger, her smile back was sheepish.

“Morning there, lass.”

She gave a small wave. “Good morning, everyone was gone, thought I’d check on you.”

“All’s fine, love, be better if you’d come to join me.”

“I don’t want to invade your space.”

Murphy grunted, piqued. “Don’t know what yer seein’ out here, but there ain’t nothin’ ta ‘invade.’”

She let herself look out the door, only seeing the chimney to the building as well as a few rusted lawn chairs, a few crates being used like makeshift table with beer cans littering the top, and several cardboard boxes stacked on top of each other soggy from the rain with circles drawn on it – like a bullseye.

She smiled, pointing to the stack. “Have you been practicing?”

Murph gave that smile that made him appear so young and impish. “Aye, not much different than a slingshot ta be honest. Much more kickback to it, but I been enjoying the bow. Quiet and helps me practice me aim.”

She grinned. “I’m glad it’s become useful for you…I’m going to go start breakfast for us and let you finish your cigarette.”

Sera gave a small squeak when he grabbed her to him. She glanced up shyly seeing him looking at her curious, head tilted while he chewed his lip.

“What’s got ye scramblin’ away today? Yer acting all anxious ‘round me. Is it cause of yesterday or something I did?”

The earnest way he said it had her nestling her face into his chest, smelling the tobacco and beer he must have spilled on himself the night before. It had nothing to do with him. She was the idiot here, and she knew it. She should’ve never gotten drunk last night. It was one of the numerous things she shouldn’t have done. But yesterday had to be the push to the dominoes, and soon they’d all be toppling down. Her drunken mind had made her weak, and as soon as trouble struck she had hidden like a dog about to be scolded. Though she gave her inebriation some credit if she had been sober the jolt of fear would’ve made the seizure worse.

Her dulled senses numbed the fear down making her brain turn the mess into a partial. Everyone with epilepsy had a trigger and her main one was fear. And that seems to be all she had going from here on. If the boys hadn’t been involved before they sure as hell were now. Those soldiers as they were known in their bratva would come back, especially when they got jeered at for getting whipped by two Irishmen. And if they had saw her…Connor and Murphy were in danger already, but if those men connected them together how would it be then?

_Yeah, boss, I saw her with those two Irish fucks._

_Yeah, I can tell you what they look like, and where they were hanging around._

That meant Doc could be in trouble now too. It got more unpleasant the deeper everything went. And, as always, this was going to be her fault.

“Aingeal?”

“I’m not mad at you, Murph, at either of you. It’s me. I keep doing everything wrong and…I don’t think I can put it back in the right place.”

He bent down to her, rubbing his face in her hair. “Such a pessimistic girl, things will be alright, ye’ll see.”

 _How could he be that sure?_ “I’m bad luck, Murph. God, I should’ve been there to help yesterday – I didn’t even ask if either of you were okay. Are you? Did they hurt you?”

Damn, how awful was she? Not even thinking about them getting beaten up because of her. Struggling from the embrace she looked him over. Murphy throwing her a crooked smile when she lifted his shirt to check for bruises.

“We ain’t no worse fer wear, love. Me and Conn have been in worse scrapes when we were kids.”

He didn’t seem too bad off, he had a bruise on his jaw and a small cut above his eye but it was enough for her to be guilty. And then Connor, how hurt was he when he went to work?  
She forced her chin down when he tried to tilt it up, she heard him sigh. “Told ye before we’re tougher than we look.”

“Yeah, and it would’ve been fine if it was some random bar fight, but this is my fault. They were looking for me, and now they fucking know what you look like, Murphy! They might not know I’m here, but they’re not letting this go. You hurt their pride, and to them, that’s enough to kill over.”

His chest puffed out. “Got some pride, too, tellin’ ye we’ll be fine.”

“I wish I had listened to you both sooner.”

“Bout what?”

“About being more aware of things, it’s just been so nice to have this. To be so normal…happy, I let myself down last night. I can’t let it happen again. If something was to happen – you two are family to me, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if it did.”

He cradled her face. “Not goin’ ta tell ye we won’t get hurt, good chance we might, but ye gotta let this go, Sera. All da worry and shit you’re holding onta, it’s not goin’ ta help. We need ta stick together through this and not be focusin’ on what could be or what’s happened. Know it hurts ye a great deal, but it may be time fer ye ta let the hurtin’ from the past go.”

She didn’t say anything for a while, and she knew it made him nervous, that he may have crossed a line.

“Murphy, do you believe in forgiveness?”

His stare was curious. “Course, that’s why we repent, to obtain forgiveness.”

“But – I mean, do you think everything should be forgivable? When the person is not sorry, should they be forgiven?”

He nodded, understanding starting to come in his eyes. “I do, faith aside, it’s not about freein’ them from anything, it’s fer you, love. Ye think they’re hurtin’ and grievin’ themselves over what they’ve done? Cause they aren’t. It’s you if yer able ta forgive, then you can let them go. I’m not sayin’ forget what they’ve done, but you need ta forgive ‘em so it’ll help ye move on.”

She looked from him at the landscape of buildings and cars before them. “And so I can forgive myself.”

“That too.”

She wondered if that was possible, carrying the guilt with her for so long had become like a crutch to her. But she knew Murphy was right, Klem, all the ones who had come after her family, who betrayed them, they weren’t feeling remorse for what they’ve done. If things could’ve been done differently she would’ve taken that path, but it was over and done with. She had already forgiven her father, the anger zapped from her with the thought of him. And she could be angry at the rest, she knew it would be a long process to get over all of it, but it was time to get over her grief. And compared to where she was barely a year ago, she was on a good track.

“I guess Leviticus was onto something about that after all.”

Murphy chuckled. “It was - let those fuckers be the ones ta bear with da guilt, not you.”

She froze, a thought crossing her. “‘Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself.’ Does that mean I shouldn’t kill them then?”

His hand came to squeeze her shoulder, pulling her back to him. “If da need arises I think da Lord will understand protecting yerself. It’s them that needs ta worry about this, not you. Come on, let’s get inside before ye freeze.”

She turned to look out once more. “It’s warmer today.”

“Aye, it’ll be spring before ye know it, most likely there’ll be another blizzard in da works before that.”

It was still a good ways off but she was looking forward to it - spring, a time of new beginnings, and if it meant enduring another snowfall to get a good one then she’d deal with it. Seeing Murph holding the door open she followed after him inside. Throwing off his coat he flopped on the unmade bed, Shep bounding up to join him while she went to the fridge.

“You and Connor worked out shifts with me, huh?”

Turning onto his stomach his eyes went to hers. “Better than fighting over ye, isn’t it?”

She snorted. “I don’t see much sense in that. Besides neither of you seem to fight much unless it’s over something trivial.”

He sat up. “Trivial? And what exactly is trivial that we fight about?”

“Let’s see – who gets the good stool at McGinty’s, whose robe is whose, which one gets the last piece of food, who’s the oldest –“

“That’s not a trivial thing! Ye can’t look me in the eyes and tell me ye never fought about it with yer own set!”

She laughed. “No, I haven’t. But we didn’t have a mother who withheld that tidbit from us. But it wasn’t something we ever got mad about unless Sapph got too bossy.”

“So he’s da oldest fer the three of ya?”

“Yep, which means he’ll go senile first.”

“Not unless one of us drives ye ta madness first, aye?”

She laughed, closing the fridge. “That’s true. Ugh, we’re going to have to go to the store, Murph. There’s nothing here to cook.”

Sad, the fridge looked as it did when she first got there – only condiments, and now a lonely lemon sitting inside. They had been busy and too mixed up in things to notice.

“May as well, got nothing ta do.”

“It’ll be nice to spend the day together. Maybe while we’re out we can do something for Shep, like go to the park. I haven’t doted on him as much as I used to, it’d be good for him to play somewhere. Take Connor  
some lunch if you’re okay with it.”

Murphy’s smile was close to indulgent. “Whatever ye want ta do, love, I’m up fer it.”

“Oh, really? Cause you’re still in bed.”

“Just waitin’ ta see if you’d make yer move or not.”

“I’ll wait till you’re least expecting it.”

He grinned, allowing her to slip to the other room to change. When she had started to gather her things, Murphy had shot off the bed, roaming over on the table that had the bag before coming to her.

“Got this fer ye last night too.”

The gift was covered with a handkerchief, and she noticed Murphy chewing on his nail, a tic she had come well to know when she began to unwrap it. Her eyes went to him in bewilderment.

“Oh, you got me a –“

“Switchblade, yeah, Connor told me I was full of shit fer wantin’ it. But I’d feel better if ye had it on ye. It’s more concealable than a gun and everything.”

She couldn’t help the smile that came, it was thoughtful. Him giving her that independence while keeping her safe at the same time.

“I’ll take it with me wherever I go. You know I used to have one.”

His thumb fell from his mouth then. “Yeah?”

She nodded, her mind going to two different moments in time. “It was actually Sapph’s, you know, from Boy Scouts. But when he dropped out he didn’t want it. I carried that thing for years, I lost it not too long  
ago. They do come in handy on occasion. But really, thank you for thinking of me like that.”

He looked borderline proud and embarrassed. “Always, Aingeal. Come on, let’s take doggo out.”

Murphy insisted on driving, remaining tense from her seizure from yesterday. She didn’t mind letting him, it allowed her time to think. Her elation of knowing her brother was okay calming her, sure he was pissed off, but he was alive. Yet, like her, Rocco and his circle had been able to pin him down. Even if she was sure Roc would never harm her or her family, she was very skeptical if the rest of his associates would be the same. She wanted to know what Sapph was up to if he was with someone that would help him, aid him, be there for him. She wanted to know where he was, how far away, if she’d ever see him. Not having the ability to be there, to know for sure how he was physically and mentally hurt her. It hurt close to the same as when he left her in the first place. Telling her the severance without the goodbye would hurt her less. It hadn’t if anything it hurt her more, worse than that bullet going through her, and worse than if he had died. None of the ones she loved had that choice of goodbye, their end coming too sudden. But Sapph did, and he chose to just walk away from everything.

Choking down the bitterness, she tried to look to the good. If her brother hadn’t left it wouldn’t have pushed her to leave Florida. In that she wouldn’t have moved as far away as she could, not finding her passion in art again, as well as a hope in humanity and some semblance of normalcy that she wanted to maintain in the future. Among physical reasons, one seating right next to her, these two men giving her the strength she had lost to fight back again. She was terrified of something happening to them but was grateful they had been sent to her regardless.

Murphy, feeling the attention, turned to smile at her. “I look that good, ye gotta stare?”

She smiled, shaking her head. “That, and I’m just happy, you make me happy.” Taking a breath of cool air she exhaled. “I’m strangely calm today; it’s just a good feeling.”

He took her hand, grinning. “’S’a sign that’s it’s gonna be a good day today.”

“I think so too.”

After driving for a while they found a few dog parks mingled in with the regular ones, and it was wonderful to let Shep from his leash. As soon as he saw her signal that it was fine he took off, racing through the grass to the light gravel area. Being with her around the clock he got to do quite a bit of walking, but it didn’t add up the same as this. Near one of the gazebos she had found a bin of tennis balls, letting him come back to her after he finished greeting all the other dogs before she went to throw it. It had been awhile, and she worried he wouldn’t want to. But when she let the green orb go he flicked out to search for it. The sheltie raised his rear in the air to chew on his find for a moment before bringing it back for another go. After a few tosses she held out the slightly slobbered ball out to Murphy.

“Want to give it a try?”

He had been propped up on the bench, watching them while he smoked. He glanced at the ball for a bit, contemplating, before he snubbed out his cigarette. He rolled the ball in his hand, oblivious to the wetness.

“Don’t matter where it goes then?”

She laughed, pushing her hair back from the wind. “As long as it isn’t on the road, it’s fine.”

He tossed it lightly, underhand, Shep leaping up and catching it easily.

“I used ta want a dog like Shep when I was a kid.”

“Did you have any pets?”

_**Gif by winterchilds-addixon** _

Murphy shook his head, the messy tufts of hair sticking up and the look on his face giving her a glimpse of that little boy. She understood from a parental perspective why they couldn’t, usually the responsibility fell to them and with her being a single mom and wrangling them, throwing in a dog it may have been rough. But growing up and always having a dog with her, she knew what a joy it was and wished things could’ve been different for her boys.

She rubbed his arm. “You have one now. You know Shep loves you, probably more than me.”

She saw that small smile itching to release. “Not true, he’ll be true to ye.”

She took his hand, lifting it up to kiss the back of it. “He is for you too. He doesn’t come to someone unless he trusts them. If someone was to lash at you I know he’d attack them. And that true stuff goes for me as well.”

The grin was on full display now, him ducking away to grab the ball. Seating herself on the bench she put her knees to her chest to lean her head on. They always gave her small peeks of themselves, and with the opening there she wanted to know more.

“What were you like as a kid? How it was growing up?”

He raised a brow at her question but seeing her curiosity lowered it. “I guess not much different than anybody’s comin’ down to it. Our Ma had ta work a lot when our Da left us, meanin’ we didn’t have too much supervision. We’d get inta plenty of tussles with the other kids in da neighborhood, one talkin’ shit about us or somethin’. Conn and me kept at each other’s side. We gave hell in school, I mean we liked it and all loved ta learn and shit made good grades and everything. But it’d get boring sometimes and we’d put some excitement in da day. Our uncle took care of us a lot when Ma was workin’ so we hung out at da bar. Not too much ta brag about lass.”

Her smile widened, letting her hand reach out to try and flatten the hair on his forehead with no avail. “I know that’s not true. But I did enjoy how I asked about you and I heard ‘we’ throughout.”

Murphy’s cheeks reddened, scratching his neck. “Sorry, used ta includin’ Connor in everythin’.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for, Murph. I love that you both include each other in all that you do. Hell, I’d probably end up doing the same thing. But I like getting to know you guys individually too. Mostly I just observe but I like it more when you tell me things.”

He tilted his head, eyes remaining on the ground. “Yeah, and what yer observations been telling ye?”

“I already know that you’re favorite color’s blue, you tend to look up when the skies are clear. You prefer to sleep on your stomach and usually without a pillow. You love macaroni and cheese but only the boxed kind because you hate the flour taste when it’s homemade. You have a huge sweet tooth. But where Connor loves any type of cake or pastry you’ll eat anything as long as it’s chocolate.”

Murphy had started smile, though his focus remained on the ground letting her continue. “That you like it in America but miss Ireland. That you’re an amazing son that makes sure his mom is cared for. That you’re a gentleman, but like to have a good time, if sometimes a rambunctious one. I know that when you were younger you loved photography, but chose not to pursue a career in so you wouldn’t end up hating it. And I know that you’re the sensitive one between the two of you, which isn’t a bad thing. Where Conn sees things firsthand, you feel them. Am I warm at all?”

He lunged for her then, making her shriek in surprise, the sound making many of the dogs barking as their owners watched the couple in amusement or disgruntled. She hated making such a girly sound, but with  
her heart racing and heat coming up her body she couldn’t give it that much of a care. Clutched to him, Murphy kissed her eagerly, and she reciprocated sucking in his bottom lip as he did her top one. The gesture causing her to laugh, which gave him the chance to sneak his tongue inside letting the vibrations of her groan bounce to him. He pulled away, and she leaned into his side watching as his Adam's apple bob when he swallowed.

“Starting ta think we got a problem makin’ out in public, love.”

Her mouth quirked, licking her lips to see that gleeful look in those blue eyes. “That might be so, but I’m not complaining about it.”

Murphy chuckled. “Neither am I. But if you’re ready ta go, I’m starved.”

“Yeah, I’m getting kind of hungry. I’m sure Connor is too, being a liar this morning that he was going to cook something when there isn’t a crumb in it.”

“Don’t be worryin’ about me brother, he scrounged somethin’ up I’m sure.”

She smiled when he held his arm out for her, letting her loop hers with his. “That might be true, but I’ve taken it as my role to keep you both fed.”

Opening the car door for her, he kissed her cheek. “And we’re both glad that ye do. Probably be bad fer you though, a few years from now you’ll have two sacks of blubber on yer hands.”

She snickered, while he loaded Shep in. “Off to da market then?”

“Sounds like a good plan to me.”

She always liked going to the market, it reminded her of the flea markets her mom and aunt took them to on the weekends, giving a wide array of vendors and tastes that took you across the world. After getting a cart they tried to make a path through the throng of people. Sera made sure to get plenty of canned foods and staples for the pantry so they wouldn’t have to worry about being cleaned out again. Situating those first they got to perishables, Murphy still showing contempt at the sight of the vegetables. It was fun having him juggle some lemons, causing several of the children to halt their parents to watch. He was up to seven when he lost pace, lemons falling onto the floor, but not losing stride he bowed picking up the fruit and tossing them in the cart as everyone clapped. It was turning out to be a good day. Nice, normal, it lulled her making her soul hum in contentment. Getting done, she paid the last vendor and was ready when Murphy grabbed her elbow, making her pause and see he was pointing to a wine vendor.

“Que dites-vous, ange? Peut-être que cela nous donnerait un goût authentique.” **(What do you say, angel? Perhaps it'd give us an authentic taste.)**

She hated that, and she suspected they knew it too. To be fair she didn’t completely hate it. But she did get angry at herself for not learning more than a few phrases of the languages the boys had acquired. But what got her, and what they probably used against her was the way the dialects affected her. As Murphy gave the slow annunciation of the words she felt herself gulp on reflex making a feline grin take over his face. She tried to smile, batting him away to push the cart, but he stopped her.

“Aww, allez, j'ai vu dans vos yeux que votre bouche s'écoule pour cela. Pourquoi ne pas lui donner un aller?” **(Aww, come on, I saw it in your eyes that your mouth waters for it. Why not give it a go?)**

Her knees were shaking now, her body supported by the cart. “As much as I enjoy hearing you talk French, you know I have no clue what you’re saying. Besides neither of you even like wine.”

Gripping the sides of the cart, he leaned over until he was close enough so she could smell him – that mix of smoke, sweat, and something heady and sweet she could never put a name to.

“Les deux d'entre nous n'ont jamais eu le vaisseau approprié pour l'un. Mais je crois que nous le faisons maintenant. Voulez-vous, amour? En ayant moi et mon frère dribbler du vin froid sur toi et le faire moucher? Je pense que vous le feriez.” **(The two of us never had the proper vessel for one. But I believe we do now. Would you like that, love? Having me and my brother dribbling cold wine over you and lapping it up? I think you would.)**

Her knuckles had turned white gripping the cart’s handle, she felt too much heat on her, in her, and it faltered her that something so simple was doing this. She closed her eyes trying to control her breathing, wanting the static that had leeched into her nerves to stop. Then she felt a feather light touch graze her neck, the warmth and wetness telling her it was a kiss.

“Je veux t'avoir une fille douce. Voulez-vous me laisser ici?” **(I want to have you all to myself sweet girl. Will you let me have you here?)**

The way the end tinted upwards told her it was a question, and without a thought, she nodded. Whatever he wanted she’d give him. Murphy grinned, but instead of the smile of a cat, he gave one that showed off his shyness. It was eager and almost unsure.

“Ye have any clue what ye said yes to?”

She tiptoed up to kiss his chin, liking the scratch from the hair there. “Doesn’t matter, I still say yes.”

He kept his eyes on her, gauging for a reaction, while his hands wandered to the hem of her shirt. The warm hand splayed out on her stomach making her shudder.

“Ye sure, love?”

She could feel the heat that was in her cheeks falling down to her neck. “Yeah, had an idea at what you were hinting at. I kind of already let it slip at what your French does to me.”

He grinned. “Aye, good ta have somethin’ at my advantage. Let’s see if there’s somethin’ more secluded in da back.”

She tucked her hair back, her heart racing. She’d never done anything like this before, hell, she hadn’t done nearly any of the things she had since meeting them but public sex. Her mother would tell her she  
wasn’t being respected if asked for that. Her brother would say she was being used. Her sister would shirk back at the whole idea. And her dad…her dad would never be allowed to find out. But she knew it wasn’t about any of that. Getting this far she knew otherwise, and she wasn’t that afraid – it wasn’t like they were going to rut with a crowd watching. But something else did bother her.

“Will Connor be mad at me if he finds out?”

Kisses and embraces were an anytime thing for all of them, but when it came to the full act of intimacy all three had been present. With many of this being new for her she had no idea what guidelines or boundaries could be crossed. Murphy stopped then.

“Why would he be mad?”

She was worried both their feelings would be hurt now. “I don’t know how this all works, Murphy. I don’t want anyone to feel left out or anything. I’m not sure if I’m saying this right –“

“Ye don’t want ta show favoritism?”

Her brows knitted. “Yes, but no. It’s not really about that. I can say I love you both equally, but there are different things about you that I favor more in each of you…I don’t know, I don’t want either of you hurt.”

“No one’s gonna be hurtin’, aingeal. Only thing Conn will be mad about is that he didn’t get to ye first.”

She almost snickered at the truth in there, the two always competing.

She tugged his belt then. “We better be getting a move on then, I’ve been waiting to be filled up by something since this morning.”

Though she was comfortable in her skin, words weren’t her strong suit, better by doing than talking. Cupping Murphy through his jeans she hoped the growing bulge she felt conveyed what she wanted to be filled with. She was pleasantly stunned when Murphy pushed her with a tad more force, both stumbling in a small supply closet.

“What about Shep?”

There was no way she could grunt and groan with her dog watching. Without a pause Murphy looped the leash around the door’s knob, pushing their cart beside the door.

“Goin’ ta have ta be quicker than usual, love. But he’ll be fine out here, chase off any fucker stupid enough ta try and take our shit.”

She nodded, her face starting to burn again Sera stooped down to pet Shep, telling him to be good before she was pulled into the room. The light didn’t work inside, only shards of light coming in the cracks to help them. She was backed against something and when Murphy pressed against her and felt his way behind her back they realized it was a work table. He maneuvered her enough so he could wipe off the debris causing a small clanging when whatever occupied the area hit the ground.

She tittered, a laugh wanting to bubble. “I thought we were supposed to be quiet?”

She didn’t need to see to know he was smirking. “I said quick, not quiet.”

She nearly caught an elbow to the ribs when he took his coat off to put on the table for her. She tried to kiss him for that ending up with her pecking his nose instead. She heard Murphy’s throaty giggle and it made her laugh as well.

“Not as easy as I thought this would be. Books and movies make it look smooth.”

Sera felt her jeans come undone. “Aye, but it’s mighty fun, ain’t it?”

She knew she didn’t have to but tilted her head to be coy. “Aye, but I may enjoy even more if you were to orchestrate this in French.”

“Oh, yeah? Juste attendre jusqu'à ce que je me coule les dents dans toi.” **(Just wait until I sink my teeth into you.)**

Her breath caught then, while her pants and underwear were pushed to her feet. Murphy tapped her thighs, taking her hand.

“Je dois sortir d'eux, mon amour.” **(Got to step out of them, love.)**

It took a few times with the motion but the third time he tapped her knee she realized she needed to kick off the garments.

“Thanks for letting me keep my shoes on…I know it’ll be impossible to get your pants off with those heavy boots on but if we get caught I want us to be somewhat even here.”

She pushed his shirt up, his arm grazing her ear when he tossed it off. Sera felt hands on her bare skin, guiding her up onto the table, Murphy’s hips coming in contact with her inner thighs. She inhaled deep when his skin touched hers.

“You are quick.”

His forehead fell on hers. “J'aimerais pouvoir prendre mon temps avec vous. Voulez-vous faire trembler votre corps et ressentir de la misère car le mienne est pour vous. Je ne peux tout simplement pas attendre.” **(I wish I could take my time with you. Want to make your body squirm and tremble and feel needy as mine is for yours. I just can't wait though.)**

****

_**Found on Giphy** _

She felt him then, the head slippery from want as it slid through her own dripping slit. She flexed her nails into his arm, sighing when she heard him his. She had no idea how many girls before her had been in this exact position with her boys, but she let herself believe she was the only one given such incredible consideration. She knew he needed this, felt that he needed this, and though Murphy was the one that jumped in headfirst without thought she knew that squeeze on her hip was his way of asking permission. It was her chance to back out, of him not wanting her to regret this or be upset with herself later on. Without sight, she felt for his face with her hands bringing him down to kiss her before moving her hips to his so he could find his way in.

Letting them adjust she clasped him to her, stroking his hair the way he liked when they were going to slip. Her grip got tighter on it when he started to thrust. She wanted to say he was as bad as Connor when it came to teasing, letting himself pull slowly back out before ramming himself back in. But she knew why he was doing it. It was scary that they knew her body better than her – her nerve endings sparking to life from the hard thrusts only coming to a simmer when he withdrew. She knew she was done before she even peaked, Murphy’s incisors piercing her clavicle being her tipping point. The surprise of it had her gasping for air as if she had been smothered, Murphy’s hands lovingly caressing her but his pace picking up speed to finish with her.

Kissing her neck he put her arms around his neck as he gripped her thighs picking her up in a way that the backs of her knees were on the crooks of his arms. The angle made her quiver again, the winding inside her ready to spring. She raked her hands and nails at whatever skin she had, his and hers, the stance he had her unable to pull herself up enough to reach him. She could hear people walking around, talking, kids laughing, begging their parents for something sweet. This should make her feel guilty. She was on the verge of feeling something akin to dirty, but that wasn’t it. It was…wild. Freeing, like she had been purged from the sky only to hit the ground. She had to grit her teeth to keep from howling, her legs gripping him as she finished before him again.

“God, Murphy.”

“Sssh, Lord’s name, les filles.” **(Lass)**

Catching his mouth she bit down on his tongue, making him jab hard into her feeling the hot stream of him thrash on her cervix. He panted, leaning on her and the table when his knees knocked together.

“Everloving, Christ.”

“And you say that to me?”

Her voice was just as breathless, but she was able to laugh feeling his mouth twitch on her shoulder.

“It’s the only way ta express what ye do ta me, Aingeal.”

There wouldn’t be much of a chance for afterglow, but she gave in to letting her hands wander over him stroking down the unruly locks, and raking her nail softly down his neck while the other hand stroked his back then heading to the other side to go up against his belly. She sighed when in return Murphy helped to bring her down too, tilting her head back to place soft kisses over her face and neck, letting his hands send tingles all down her back as they skimmed her thighs. Still buried inside her they could both feel the other’s climax. After a few minutes of indulgence, she let her legs untangle dropping from him to dangle.

She scooted off the table falling towards his naked chest. “How are we going to find our clothes here?”

She could hear the pangs of his zipper gliding up stepping away to open the door a crack.

“Doesn’t look like anyone’s stolen our stuff, should give us enough light ta see what’s what.”

They had a few heads turn their way when they exited, but instead of embarrassment, it caused Sera to laugh, especially when she got to see her new marking in full light. Murphy smiled at her, running a finger over his lips, anxious like he was expecting her to be disappointed in them both instead. Sera only shook her head at him, pulling the cart behind her, making him laugh in turn when she grabbed a few bottles of wine on their way out.

“You won’t try one bite?”

Murphy shook his head at her, sipping on the soda he got with his lunch. “Sorry Aingeal, but I have no fuckin’ clue how ye eat that shit.”

She raised her eyebrows at him, making a show to toss a piece of cured fish in her mouth causing him to blanch. She pointed to the hot dog he had in his lap.

“And I seriously don’t know how you eat that.”

He smirked, chancing a glance at her before moving his eyes back to the road. “What yer people got against pigs? Bet if ye tried it you’d love it.”

“I didn’t say it doesn’t taste good, and most Jews have no problem with pork. Sapph can eat a whole pack of bacon when he gets the urge to.”

She could tell he was baffled. “If yer brother eats it, how come ye don’t?”

She shrugged. “I have before, but when my mom found out she tried to sensitize us –“

“The hell’s that mean?”

“Basically it means she dragged us out of school to go to a slaughterhouse to see a pig be turned into hotdogs.”

Murphy laughed. “And that’s why ye can’t eat ‘em? Conn and me watched the slaughter all the time, where ye think all the meat comes from, love?”

She closed her eyes tight. “I know. I know before it’s in the stores the meat all meets the same end in a similar fashion, but to see the poor thing strung up and killed, that horrible smell when they burned his skin off, and that God-awful squelching noise the machines have when they make that stuff – I don’t want it.”

“And all this time we thought it was because ye were a good lil Jew.”

“I am!”

He chuckled at her again, making her smile and glare at the same time.

“Ye could at least have some bacon once in a while.”

She gagged. “Uh-uh.”

“We’ll sneak it in on ye, need it fer a healthy diet.”

She blew her lips together to keep from laughing. It stopped when they got to the plant, and after recalling that wonderful day she wasn’t sure she wanted beef to be ruined for her too. Reading her thoughts Murphy called out behind her.

“We only cut it up and pack it, love. It’s dead by the time it gets ta us.”

That was a relief, grabbing the bag of food they got for Connor she followed Murph inside. It smelled as she thought it would, the raw meat that usually permeated the boys’ clothes staggering inside. It made her stomach roll but she was able to hide it. Shep, on the other hand, was going crazy, barely in the lobby and his snout was up in the air detecting the delicacies he wanted not too far away. She patted his side to calm him.

“We have to stay in here, buddy.”

Murphy gazed at her, deplored, eyebrow cocked. “No, ye don’t.”

She gestured to Shep, dumbfounded. “I believe his excess hair makes him a health hazard, Murph.”

He waved her off. “No one will give a shit, love, come on.”

He took her hand then, tugging her before she gave in with a huff. The smell was worse in the back and she had to hold a hand to her nose to let it adjust to the bloody scent. Then there was the heat, being brought in from the chill it should’ve been welcome, yet this was plain muggy heat – sticking to you and not letting go until you sweat it out.

“I thought ya took the day off, Murph.”

The voice came from an older, stocky man coming up to the two as he flipped through his clipboard.

“I am, but the lass wanted ta bring Connor some food. Worried he’s gonna starve.”

She rolled her eyes at him, muttering. “Don’t act like you’d want him to.”

He grinned at her, steering her to face their new companion. “This here’s McGerkin, love, we let him think he’s in charge here.”

She reached out and shook the man’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you, sir, I’m Sera. I want to thank you for giving the boys these hours off.”

She didn’t mean to sound so formal, but years of being taught to respect her elders and people in authority had kicked in at that moment. The introduction making McGerkin throw his head back and laugh.

“Oh, forgive me, child, it’s a pleasure for me ta meet ye. Never would’ve figured either of these two could get a girl like you though, ‘specially one that’s got some manners, but there’s no need fer any of that polite  
shite here. Will be up front and say they were right about ye being a looker though.”

She blushed. “Thank you. I’ll work on it, afraid it was beaten in me so it’s second nature now.”

Murphy pulled her into his side. “She keeps us in line that’s fer sure. So’s Conn been fuckin’ up without me?”

There was no need to respond Connor’s laughing echoing past the people surrounding him. Murphy took her past the railings to the assembly line, various people greeting her and petting Shep – that had her recoiling. When they approached Connor was still chuckling, but she stopped when she saw the humongous woman next to him. He shook his head eyes connecting towards them, he grinned, patting the giant on the arm who wrenched away with a sneer. Whatever Conn was laughing about she obviously did not like it. Coming up he kissed her cheek, and she saw the gleam in there when he went to put an arm around his brother’s shoulders.

“Hey Murph!”

She noticed the raised volume of his voice, several others turning to face them.

Murphy, unsure, chewed at his lip. “Aye?”

“How many lesbians does it take ta screw in a lightbulb?”

Oh. This is why she’s mad, and this is why she looks like she’s going to murder him.

But Murphy seemed oblivious to it, grinning, wanting to know the answer. “How many?”

“Conn –“

He grinned at her, taking her shoulders with the other arm. “It takes two, doesn’t it? One ta screw in da lightbulb, and one wee little lesbian ta suck me fuckin’ cock!”

Everyone laughed, used to this humor from the two, but that woman was striding over with one of the cleavers. Sera could see steam billowing from her nose like a bull’s.

“I knew you were going to give me trouble! Giving me shit cause I’m a woman, well I’m not gonna take your male dominance bullshit here!”

Sera knew him and Murph may have old-fashioned views on some things and, yeah, they sometimes went overboard with the jokes but they both respected women.

“He didn’t mean –“

The woman started to look her way and she gulped.

“Come now, Rozie, I just wanted a rise outta ye.”

Murphy stood in for him as well. “Yeah, he’s tryin’ ta break the ice with ye.”

She towered over him. “Does it look like I’m laughing, fuck face?”

Connor motioned for them to quiet down. “All right, ‘m sorry there, okay? So just relax.”

He went to touch her arm, the woman rearing back as he did and threw a punch hard enough to make Connor stagger; him grabbing onto the line to get his balance. Shep had barked at the assault, and Sera reeled him in before he could bite her. Connor started to look livid while he grabbed his nose.

“How about ye be saving that aggression for yer marches and protests and whatnot instead of –“

Sera could feel the kick like it was between her own legs and she went to help him when he went down as did a few other of the female workers. She almost went to rub it for him like a lunatic but opted to rub his back instead. Her brother had gotten injuries like this in a similar fashion but she didn’t know how to help it. Pain pills and ice was all she could come up with. Seeing his face splotch purple and he kept gritting his teeth she wanted to get him home.

“You fucking slaves, kowtowing to the needs of men! C’mon, get the fuck up!”

She stood up then, already knowing she’d be eaten but not giving a shit. “So you can spout off about equal rights and misogyny like it’s nothing but when it comes to having a fair fight you cop out? You act high and moral but you don’t have the balls to back it up do you!”

Shep was growling when the woman snarled at them coming closer to her. You need to act before she does. Without thinking she hunched herself over and charged, hoping she’d hit the solar plexus. Happening in seconds a whoosh of air resounding but she didn’t go down, rather it gave her more fuel to grip at Sera’s arm before she could pull away before yanking her to the ground. It felt like her arm went out of its socket but she rotated it for a second, turning over to defend herself. But Murphy was quick enough to get in the way and strike, this time making her go down.

**gif by Reedusgif**

“Christ sake…Come on, Rocky, let’s get you and shit fer brains home.”

She was able to exhale, head lying on the floor. _Lord’s name, Murph._


	15. Just a Holy Fool

**One of Three**   
**Chapter 15 – Just a Holy Fool**   
**[Thanks again to my betas – CanadianJelly and bleedingrose0688 – you guys are the best! I also want to thank everyone following and/or reviewed, special shout out to Str1der2015. I never like to ask for reviews but they really do help motivate me and let me know if what I’m doing is good or bad so thank you!]**

“Do we need ice or do we heat it?”

Connor hit the couch, his eyes widening at her while Murphy cackled. “Yeah, lass, let’s have us a good nut roast.”

She narrowed her eyes at the brunette, seeing him already begin to chuck off his clothes. “I’m sorry. I can’t say I’ve dealt with this type of injury firsthand before.”

Connor took off his shirt as well, now starting of the confinements of his jeans. There was sweat gathered around his hairline, the leftover adrenaline and pain overheating him. She stepped beside Murphy, getting one of the washcloths before he turned the shower on. Connor smiled at her, though she could see the grimace in it while he closed his eyes at her soft touch.

“No heat, Sera, need ice ta take down da swellin’. Don’t need ‘em the size of grapefruits do we?”

She gave a small chuckle, forgetting to filter her words. “I suppose it would make it hard to get them in my mouth.”

She ducked her head in embarrassment, feeling the both of them tense up.

“I’ll get the ice.”

She didn’t turn around but she knew they were speaking to each other, usually using their eyes, other times she had noticed what they gathered from one another was too extensive to have gotten from one look. But she had done it with her own siblings, it was one of the reasons it never bothered her to be left out. She knew it was between them and them only. Wrapping up the ice she grabbed a beer from the fridge to toss Connor in hope that it’d help dull his senses enough to ease the tension in him and maybe the pain. She cursed herself inwardly for not getting something stronger than wine.  
About to sit beside him, she jumped in surprise that he had stripped down entirely. Connor grinned, taking the beer she had a death grip on.

“Ahh, Seraphine, I love that no matter how many times ye see us in da nude ye still manage ta get all flustered.”

Murphy pulled her in from behind, making her body freeze, even more, feeling that he was just as stripped down as his brother. “Aye, t’Lord sent us a pure one, didn’t He, brother?”

It was true, she had seen them like this a number of times, going a whole day in the buff around the loft with her. But sometimes, at the moment very grudgingly, she would be in disbelief that these two prime specimens were hers. And now here she was blushing at being caught for it as Murphy embraced her, able to feel all of him alongside herself.

“We’ll make a sinner outta ye, yet, made a start with it today, didn’t we, lass?”

Sera swallowed, her tongue having grown too large for her mouth to speak. Unable to answer she looked up at Connor. She didn’t know what they had said in those minutes between them, and Connor sure as hell wasn’t helping – his expression neutral and unreadable. Murphy’s hands reached up to cup her breasts, and she saw a twitch in Connor’s jaw.

Murphy's lips grazed her ear, the hot breath making her tingle. “Ye gonna tell him, aingeal? Go and tell me brother what ye let me do withcha.”

She was able to exhale in relief when the phone started ringing. Extracting herself from Murphy’s arms she went to pick up the cordless.

“Hello, MacManus residence.”

She heard them laugh at her, they always did when she answered the phone, taking the pillow from the couch she heaved it at the closest one.

“They’ll keep poking fun atcha fer as long as ye keep up with that secretary voice there.”

Sera bit into her lip, it was the boys’ mom. She had talked to the elder MacManus a few times now, but it remained an ongoing endeavor. Not being able to see her, she had no idea what the woman truly thought of the girl taking up with both her sons. But whatever the boys had told her made her seem content with it all.

“I’ll have to keep that in mind, though I know your sons will pick something else to make fun of me with.”

She saw them perk up then.

“Don’t be takin’ their shite, lass. Me boys need someone ta care fer ‘em, but they need a firm hand more often than not.”

“Yes, ma’am, I’ve started to notice that.”

“Don’t need ta be hearin’ none of that ma’am shite either! I know ye enough from the two of ‘em so ye call me Ma or Annabelle don’t need ta hear that Mrs. MacManus and I ain’t so old I want ta be called ma’am.”

She balked, Sera wasn’t sure if she was comfortable with that, but she didn’t want to appear disrespectful. And it was definite that she had no idea if one or the other would offend her, she took one and hoped for the best.

“Okay, momma, I’ll try to remember from here on. Is everything all right there?”

Sera wouldn’t call her Ma – that was for the boys alone. Mommy or mom wouldn’t work, that name would be held for someone else even if that particular loved one would never hear it again, and mother was only used in formal settings…or in anger. Though it sounded juvenile to her ears it was all she could think of to say, but the soft kindness coming back Sera believed she picked right.

“Everything’s fine here, dearie, but I’m gonna need a favor from ye.”

“Of course.”

“Needing ye ta look perplexed like. Believe it’s time they be fucked with, aye?”

Sera held back her smile, taking Murphy’s go to and sticking her thumb in her mouth.

“I believe so, yes.”

“If ye can look a little dour it’d be a help too and nod a wee bit. It’ll drive ‘em crazy. But I’m gonna be tellin’ ye lass since yer the one ta pick up. Don’t be being afraid of me, yur not gonna say it but I know it. No girl’s ever made it this long with either one of me boys, so it’s sayin’ somethin’ that you’re there. As fer the other shite, one or the other or both makes no matter ta me. Ye need ta quit terrified, I ain’t plannin’ ta bite yer head off or anything. As long as ye treat them right and they ta you, yur family, ye understand?”  
She blinked, emotion welling up in her. Family. Something she should’ve held onto tighter when she had it, she promised to now.

“Yes, momma I will. I promise.”

“Good, go on and hand da phone over ta one of ‘em. Keep it up lookin’ like somethin’ wrong. Ye take care, lass.”

“You too.”

She handed over the phone to Connor, waiting by the fridge to see what would play out.

Murphy gave her a half smile, tenderness lingering. She was glad he pleased with their mother’s acceptance. “Want ta join me in da shower, love?”

Rubbing her lips together she gave a smile back. “If you can get the hot water on.”

He pouted then. “Fuck.” He turned to Connor. “The water’s not heatin’ ye need ta go –“

“Shut it!”

The way Connor’s eyebrows slowly came down, knitting together so close that his forehead wrinkled. A tell to his twin that something was amiss. “Ma what’re sayin’? You’re talkin’ crazy.”

Murphy walked over to him then. “What’s the matter with her?”

He turned to look at her, and Sera did her best to give a limp shrug. Their mom was good, seeing the concern begin to display on their faces.

Connor leaped off the couch, holding his balls to him. “Ma! What da hell are ye doin’ with Da’s gun?”

Murphy’s jaw slackened in shock. “Da’s gun, what da fuck?”

“Pull da trigger have ye lost it, woman?”

Murphy zipped by her then, getting his coat and running back to Connor. She felt bad, yet the tickles of laughter bubbling up in her belly as they scrambled, yelling out.

“Get ahold of yerself! Listen ta Connor now! I’m talkin’ some sense here…. Ma I swear ta fucking God –“

She heard something like a pop over the receiver Connor pushing Murphy as he dropped the phone, both diving to the floor to get it both screaming at the top of their lungs for their Ma. The ice was everywhere, two bare naked men – well one in socks – rolling in it, and with all their hollering Shep had bounded in prancing around them and licking their faces. Sera let herself lose it, shrinking to the floor holding her knees to her chest to fall over sideways on the floor.

_**Gif by veritaas** _

She saw how confused they were, realization dawning on them.

Murphy took over the phone, scathing. “Lord have mercy, that was a good one, Ma.” Holding the phone out Sera could hear the cackling on the other end. “She’s quite proud of herself.”

“Of course she is!”

Sera couldn’t breathe, silent laughs continuing to come as she felt tears streaming. It was then she saw Murphy’s shoulders tighten turning to look at her.

“And she fuckin’ knew! Ye let her in on it!”

The stern looks from them both didn’t help control her, and it didn’t help as Shep thought the high octaves meant they wanted to play with him deciding to jump atop them and make himself at home; instead, it made another round rumble up in her.

“No, boy, get down, you don’t need to be on people when they’re undressed. Come on.”

She ushered him off them, going behind the showers to turn on the stove and get the pans she needed. Putting everything except what she needed away she turned back to them seeing they had hung up, yet carrying such stunned expressions.

“That’s yer fuckin’ mother talkin’ like that!”

“It’s yer fuckin’ mother.”

She held in her laugh but smiled. “I believe she’s both of yours. I see where you two get it from.”

Murphy got to his feet. “And ye knew about it! Let us think our Ma had lost her shit like that!”

Her smile fumbled then. “I am sorry. But I’m not going to say it wasn’t funny. Besides…I think your Ma is accepting me, maybe starting to like me, do you really want me to say no to her?”

She went to help Connor up, one hand remaining on his damaged privates. Paying attention she saw the edge leaving their eyes. Connor’s cheeks pursed out, exhaling loud from the exertion when he was up. Taking a few breaths he placed his hand on her shoulder.

“Nah, love, we understand, Ma’s can be a force ta reckon with. But you’ve already bypassed all that about bein’ accepted. Ye think she just lets anybody call her Ma? Or momma fer ye, aye? Somebody ups and does that is askin’ fer a dent in da skull. Yer an honorary MacManus, aingeal.”

She felt pride welling inside her hearing this, thinking of the night before her heart fluttered in her chest making her dizzy.

“You really want to give me that name, don’t you?”

Connor gave a toothy smile, leaning into her. “Might be so, but what I want right now, love is ta know what ye were doin’ with me brother today.”

She gaped. “We, uh, we…”

She could hear Murphy chuckling. “Can’t ye take a guess? Ye heard Ma ‘bout it, our lass was wanting da OLDER brother.”

Murphy said his brother wouldn’t be upset, but there was something there to her that was saying otherwise. It wasn’t anger, not at her, but she could feel the stiffness in Connor’s arms, a fleeting glint passing in those baby blues. Jealousy could be mixed with it but if Sera had to name it she’d say that Connor looked predacious. Yet the softness was ever present.

“That means yer wantin’ a turn with me then?”

She was able to shrug, her body starting to whir with static. “I’ll take a turn with whichever of you wants me, Connor. I like having you both with me, but like before, with Murphy, I think it’d be good with the two of us too. But I think with you injured the way you are that perhaps we should wait.”

He smiled at her, his fingertips a teasing breath on her arms. “Et rursus cum tua. Quare non tibi sit bene ac frater ut canis ad deambulandum extra?” **(You had your turn. Why don't you be a good little brother and take the dog out for a walk?)**

She didn’t know what he was saying, but the hard consonants were affecting her, she had thought Italian was the language Connor had that could make her quiver but he had proved her wrong. She shivered hearing Murphy’s voice chime in with the same lilt.

“Puer cum eo. Hic vos videre potest a minima possedi scribam.” **(Fuck off with that. Can see from here you got a tiny dick.)**

“Sicut glacies non erat in ea! Quid putas accidere? Ut iam de portae indicavit tibi quod tua tempora tibi. ” **(I just had ice on it! What did you think would happen to it? Now get out the door, told you, you had your time.)**

She felt bad, the octaves escalating that told her they were arguing, she heard Murphy spurting turning to see his head down and depleted when he started to gather Shep. She let her focus go to the floor, trying to stop the xylophone solo her heart was playing on her ribcage. So she startled when Connor cupped her chin, his pointer finger stroking her cheek.

“I always enjoy seeing that rosy shade on ye, love, don’t think there’ll ever come a time that I’ll tire of it.”

“Conn –“

“I’m fine, believe ye can feel it by now. Only needs some heat ta make it better.”

Those smirks of theirs were going to kill her. Reaching out she stroked his face, driving her contentment when his nose nuzzled her palm. Connor may be operating by some primal urge of some notion that he had been outdone by his brother, but, as with both of them, had that chivalrous trait embedded in their heads. So she knew all she had to say was no, and he’d stop. She wasn’t sure about her future self but in the present, she couldn’t picture a moment with them that she’d say no to. She knew Connor was calculating things to himself, waiting for her response, giving him one by springing up to kiss him.

Day and night – sun and moon. That’s how she came to think of their kisses, their personalities really. It was as if they had two faces of each other, the one that was presented to the world, and the one that was hers alone. Connor was sporting a much bronzer coat than his twin and could easily be told he was the sun deity. But, to her, he was the opposite in his affections. The way he kissed her, savoring, taking his time reminded her of the unhurried pace of the night. The way he moved and watched, thinking, near to anticipating what will happen further on. A reminder of the way a wolf will stalk his prey for hours without making a sound, the unknowing excitement of what the dark could hold. She became aware that they were moving backward, Connor shuffling her to the couch.

She put a hand on his chest. “W-wait.”

“What’s wrong, Sera? Ye want da bed?”

She shook her head. “Can’t say I went all the way on one but, no, that’s not it. I want to make sure you’re not upset before we do anything. I tried to explain this with Murphy, I’m really not good at it – I don’t want either of you getting mad at each other because of me. You both have to know by now I care about the two of you immensely, but I told you when you first kissed me that I’d have no clue how this would work. And when Murphy started speaking French and suggested –“

He held his hand over her mouth, grinning when she narrowed her eyes at him.

“I ain’t mad at the lil dumbass, aingeal. I mean, yeah, I’m pissed as hell that I didn’t get to ye first –“

She snorted then, making him tilt his chin down, staring at her.

He dropped his hand, putting it on her neck. “Got somethin’ ta share?”

She laughed lightly. “I’m sorry, it’s just the two of you know each other too well.”

“Ahhh, so the stupid shit knew and went ahead, did he?”

“You sure you’re not mad?”

“No, lass, like all men we tend ta get a tad jealous every once in a while. Take no mind to it. Will say I’m surprised ye let him take ye in da market though, never pictured that from ya.”

She let her hand get caught in his chest hair, pulling until he started to shudder. “I think the two of you can get me to do a lot of things I wouldn’t normally do.”

He groaned, stopping her hands when her nails grazed his nipples. “Ye know you don’t have to, right? We get overexcited withcha sometimes but we’d never want ye ta do something ye weren’t okay doin’.”

“I know. It’s one of the things that’s endearing about you both. But I do enjoy the things we’ve done. A lot if you couldn’t tell it definitely surpasses some of the things I’ve fantasized about.”

“Oh? Ye daydream about us, aingeal? What kind of dirty things ye conjure up in that head of yours?”

She licked her lips - did he really want to know? She had tried to picture how many different ways and positions the three of them could fit in together without needing to be a contortionist, some of the things that passed in her mind she knew they wouldn’t like. Some of them she didn’t even like – the moment a strap on came in she tossed it out. If they were in dire need for a change up maybe it could come back in but she wasn’t in desperate need to fuck them in that particular fashion.

“Come on, aingeal, ye can’t tease like that.”

She flushed. “With the three of us or just you and me?”

Those teeth almost gleamed at her. “So ye thought about it every which way, have ye?”

She tipped her head back. “And neither of you have?”

“Touché, me brother and I both have very active imaginations, especially when it comes to ya.”

Putting on a poker face, she decided against her mind’s judgment and take the lead for once, having Connor sit back on the couch before she started to remove her clothes.

“I want to show you one of the better ones, I’ve had.”

“Yeah?”

She nodded, holding back a grin. Sera would never say she was graceful. She had to work hard to keep from being a clumsy wreck. She wasn’t made with a steady hand or rhythm which is why she painted and barely sketched, why she didn’t dance out in the open unless she had drunk enough. But with her audience of one, she could sway her hips, undo her hair enough so it fell around her shoulders, unbutton her jeans and sashay until they and her underwear were on the floor. The sweater she had chosen flounced past her waist, hiding her apex, and discarding the dance she scooped her arms inside unbuckling her bra to let it fall to the floor before straddling Connor. Immediately he began to tug the material up.

“There’s no need fer it, love. Don’t want ye hiding.”

“I’m trying to be coy.”

He scoffed. “Fuck that. I believe we’re past the stage where we haveta be shy with each other.”

She shook her head. “When were you ever shy?”

Connor chuckled at her. “I can’t recall. But da fact remains is that I need ta see ya. We both have a need to see our angel, need ta see how we’re touchin’, the goosebumps on that ivory skin of yers. Like ta see how hard those pink buds of yers can get, see that wetness glistening right here, telling us ye need us as well.”

He had snuck his fingers between her open thighs, slicking them through her outer lips. She moaned, moving her hips closer to them before catching herself, taking his hand away.

“You’re supposed to be letting me show you what I’ve wanted to do to you.”

“I am, Sera, didn’t say I couldn’t help move things along.”

He brought his hand between them, showing the coated fingers. “Got ta ask though, how much of this is you, and how much of it is what my brother left in ye?”

Giving a small shrug she leaned over to engulf the fingers in her mouth to suck off the fluids, pulling back she licked her bottom lip. “Can’t say for sure, Conn, tastes good either way.”

He stifled a sound that was something close to a whimper when he bunched the bottom of the sweater of and pulled it over her head. She felt the ends of her hair frizz from the wool making it feel softer on her skin. She let him stare, the weight of his eyes making her heartbeat pick up, while her hand went to him holding him carefully watching his back arch into the couch.

“Fer everything merciful in ye, please, lass.”

She felt her core clench on his words, she’d never figured Connor would be one for begging, but it was such a lovely sound.

“What, Conn?”

“I need ye, Sera.”

That vulnerable look in his eyes is what got to her, and she let herself turn around to face away from him, her back to his chest. Pulling her hair around her shoulder she left her neck exposed for him, proceeding to guide his hands to her hips to help her find him. She tried to fold her legs up to sit on either side of Connor the reversed position causing her to lose her footing.

“D'fhéadfá a líonadh suas freisin.” **(You could fill me up too.)**

“Iontaobhas dom, grá, táim i gceist agam.” **(Trust me, love, I plan to.)**

Her wetness and what was left of Murphy made it easy for him to slide inside her, and she could feel her insides beginning to tumble when she gave a testing push back into him. Connor went for her bared neck, nipping along the hollowed line of her jaw.

“Better be careful there.”

He gave a light thrust upwards, his hands grasping her tight to keep her from speeding up.

“Sometimes I wish you didn’t take your time, Connor.”

He went to give her shallow jabs then, the tip making an appearance only to recede when she tried to get him in.

“Aye. I want ta hurry and take ye, but got a bigger part of me that wants ta remember this.”

“And you like to torture me.”  
He felt his teeth scrape her skin from his smiling. “That too, but ta hear the beautiful howl ye do right when yer about ta take off fer me. All sounds better than da symphony ta me.”

He started to fill her, slow and agonizing but filling her regardless. She could feel his pulse through the veins while he widened her passage, the throbbing a reminder that she needed more friction. That warm panting didn’t help her either, his grip on her becoming firmer when she tried to wrench free. He had to be lying he had to be upset to do this. The leisured movement of going in to sit there, making every nerve ending in there become a wire coming to life then to only make them dull down before starting them up again by pulling out. It was all sparks but no light. She heard him whisper, but her mind had lost its ability of intelligible thought for that second to understand what he was saying.

“Conn?”

“Want ta know one of da things we pictured withcha, love?”

“Does it involve either of us getting off?”

He bit her ear. “I promise we will.”

“And I can say no when I want.”

It was a statement. She knew the answer to that already but felt compelled to say it to remind herself.

“The second ye get uncomfortable ye better say somethin’.”

She sputtered a laugh. “Is that what you’ve thought about? Giving me orders?”

“Ye have no idea. But I will be nice an’ ask ye ta go and please spread yer legs fer me.”

There was no harm in that, but her mind flooded making her anxious as she did so.

“Wider than that, want ta see ye.”

The unexpected voice from the doorway had her head jolting back hitting Connor’s chin.

“Oh, fuck, Murph!”

_**Gif found on Bing Images** _

He was by the door frame closing the door as quietly as he opened it, a towel he must have slung on when he took Shep out draped along his waist. He let go of it when he dropped down in front of her, placing a hand on her knee. She felt Connor nudge and kiss the back of her neck.

“Trust us, Sera.”

“I do.”

She could’ve sworn she felt Connor harden further inside her from hearing that, his hips swiveling underneath her. Murphy started to part her knees, exposing her and his brother’s position to him. She let her hair fall forward to hide her face, feeling those hands climb up her thighs and over her torso in the same instant.

“Don’t be doin’ that, ár stór. Do ye have any clue how beautiful ya are right now?” **(Our darling.)**

She wouldn’t say what she felt was exactly beautiful, but being in similar situations with them she could always feel their eyes drinking her in the appreciation of their stares pressing her to feel so adored that she couldn’t help the pride that welled in her heart. She managed a smile, but shook her head while leaning forward to kiss her dark-haired knight; Connor’s hand heading straight to her hair, gripping it tightly to hold her onto him.

“I’m bein’ generous here, brother, think I’m more deservin’ of her attention right now.”

“Oh, fuck off, ye said –“

“Я знаю, что я сказал. Будьте к ней, вместо того, чтобы разобраться с ней!” **(I know what I said. Be getting to it instead of making out with her!)**

The way they kept switching languages and Murphy’s disgruntled murmuring she couldn’t help the light titter that escaped.

“Ye thinkin’ this is funny, aingeal?”

“I’m enjoying that you two are able to fight in this predicament.”

Connor’s hands circled to her front, pushing her breasts up while Murphy smirked, leaning forward to bite one of the peaks.

“Think yer da only one here in any kind of ‘predicament.’”

Murphy’s hands joined his brother’s, fingertips like cold water droplets, making her nipples stiff before his warm mouth would engulf them. She started squirming then, face turned into Connor’s neck as she whimpered. She let her hand find its way to his hair, pulling it as he had hers as she placed open mouth kisses to his throat.

“Jesus.”

She was bearing down on him now, the intervals becoming closer together when she clutched him hard.

“Better be givin’ her what she wants or we won’t be able to keep goin’ with dis.”

Sera gave a vigorous nod. Whatever they had planned, she’d milk Connor dry if they wouldn’t give her this. All she wanted was for them to take the edge off for the time being then they could do whatever they wanted. Murphy lingered with the attack on her chest, making sure him and his brother thumbed the stiff pebbles until she rocked against them. Their ministrations tuning her like the pegs on a guitar, waiting her out before she broke and let the hums of her moans guide them.

Her eyes squeezed shut, she felt Murphy descend lower, Connor pumping upward. Sera’s skin had become sensitized, the crisp chest hair that Connor rubbed against her back causing her to arch wanting to be close and being too much. She mewled, feeling Murphy take a playful bite near her navel, and she knew he was making his marks on her. She went to clasp her hand on the dark mop of hair when Connor took both her hands pinning them behind her back.

His warm breath tickled her neck, nipping her earlobe before speaking. “Uh, uh, you’re not allowed ta touch, love, we’re gonna take care of ye.”

“Please –“

“Sshh.”

She bucked her hips down, trying to relieve the pressure, but Murphy stopped her this time his hands gripping the sides of her thighs. “Don’t be gettin’ impatient. Never get what ye want that way.”

Connor chuckled, the gesture making his chest vibrate against her back. “Aye, only good girls get rewarded. Wish I had some rope though. Betcha can’t be good enough ta keep yer hands still, can ye?”

“I think I can.”

Connor moved his hands then, callused fingers coming to lie on her sternum. The other veering off in the same direction his brother was going, finding its place between her legs and resting in her curls. She tried to move closer, wanting his hand to venture further but she was hindered by being speared onto Connor.

She growled. “En av er behöver knulla göra något.” **(One of you needs to fucking do something.)**

They both sniggered at her.

Murphy propped his head on her knee, and she peered an eye open to look at him.

“Neither of us knows what yer saying, aingeal.”

“Well, now you know how that feels. Just…one of you needs to fucking touch me.”

She didn’t have to look behind her to know Connor was sporting the same expression as his brother, that gleeful surprise of raised brows and smirks.

“We are touchin’ ye.”

She leaned forward, minding to keep her hands behind her back. “The two of you know what I mean, please…I’m about in the mind to go and do it myself.”

Murphy kissed the inside of her thigh. “That’d be fun ta watch.”

She scoffed. “If I’m made to do it myself neither of you are watching anything.”

She felt the rumbling behind her again, Connor pulling her back against his chest. “I guess we should rectify ourselves then.”

She drifted backward as Connor let the hand closet to her apex return to her mons, her subconscious spreading her legs further apart when Connor’s fingers deftly opened her outer lips. The action so soft she shivered when the air hit past her wetness. She didn’t have to wait long then, Murphy’s mouth going straight to her clit.

“Oh, God.”

Connor kissed her temple, his free hand coming up to caress her breast. “Lord’s name, lass. You better be careful down there, don’t need yer mouth anywhere near me balls, ye hear?”

The huff Murphy blew between his lips gave her a shock wave, she cried out, tossing a leg on his shoulder to bring him closer. But then his lips moved away, making her groan. His fingers continued to touch her, stroking the hood enough that he struck the tip of her clit each time.

“Ye like dis don’t ye, Sera? The two of us withcha?”

Her teeth gritted from the tortured pleasure, but she managed to speak. “Yes.”

“Better than when you were just with me?”

Fuck sake, why’d he have to ask a question like that? During all this? Impeccable timing as always.

Her breathing slowed, the orgasm she aimed for glided back. “I very much enjoyed our time with only the two of us, just as I’m sure I would with Connor. I’m not saying what we did or what we do as a couple is any less special. But I do enjoy this. It makes me feel…that it, it makes me feel. I’m tethered.”

It had been the same, yet infinitely different with Sapph and Len. Her father had told her once that she was gravity. The force that could hold a spinning coin upright even when it stopped, that she helped to bond the three of them together. And she hoped to do the same for Connor and Murphy as they were doing for her.

“Tethered, eh?”

The hunger was still there, waiting to be sated, but she was calm now. Not in any rush to finish, she was able to open her eyes and look down at Murphy. There was no resentment or anger, those blue eyes wide and innocent waiting for her to answer him. Casting a glance over her shoulder, she smiled shyly at Connor’s lazy smile his eyes displaying that he understood, that they both did, but needed the confirmation.

“Yes, being with you both makes me feel grounded, that there’s nowhere else in this universe that matters. I feel –“

“Complete?”

A new flush made its way up her chest as she let herself lean into Connor. “As cliché as it sounds, yeah, I do.”

Connor held her up, unsheathing himself, making her whimper. “I think I can speak fer the two of us that we feel that way too. Perhaps in the sense of Taoist, we were to Yangs missing our Yin.”

She chuckled before letting her eyes wander over them. “I like that theory. But I’m going to have to ask what you’re doing.”

Connor grinned going to the arm of the couch. “Since ye like da three of us together, figured ye may prefer it this way.”

“And what way is that?”

He motioned for her to stand up, a composed smile lighting his face, the sun beginning to set and casting an orange glow with his shadow. Murphy stood to help her, and she could resist giving his collarbone a kiss on her way off the couch. She worked out the angle they were wanting before she got to Connor. His erection brushing her backside when he got behind her, positioning her over the arm of the couch, her rear end up, while the rest of her body slumped on the cushions. She trembled feeling Connor’s cool palm rub over the cheek of her ass, ushering her legs a bit apart so he could brush his fingers inside her.

“Conn.”

“Relax, love.”

Unlike on the couch, his pace became much brisker when he made sure she was wet enough. He curled them up enough to hit that spot that they only seemed able to reach making her pulse quicken before he pulled away.

“Connor!”

“You’ll have it soon, aingeal. But I am curious…” His hand began trailing in reverse, and her breath caught, a lump forming in her chest when he began to move his fingers between her cheeks finding the puckered entrance. His fingers glided over it, covering the area with her wetness. “Would ye ever let us in here?”

She groaned, letting him explore. He managed to breach through the tip of his pointer finger getting past the first tight ring inside. She moaned when he wriggled, touching the nerve endings in the muscle there.

“Maybe another time, aye?”

She felt almost deplored when he exited, leaving her empty there, though another part of her sighed in relief. She knew a finger, no matter how manly, was quite a leap to what he really wanted to put there. But yes, another time. Her eyes drifted up, feeling a dip in the adjoining seat she gazed up to see Murphy settling in front of her on his knees, his own manhood appearing as hard as his twin’s. The three of them together. She smiled in contentment. She propped on her elbows the best she could, feeling Connor moving between her swollen lips from behind before he started to enter her.

Murphy met her partway, finally able to get the rigid rod in her mouth, groaning around the mushroom head when Connor slid in.  
She allowed herself to become their instrument, both speeding up in filling her – Murphy meeting the back of her throat, and Connor bottoming out as the head of him slicked against the opening to her uterus. Her body was on fire, about to fall over and dive into the water, she could feel tears falling along her cheeks – she was so close. She sobbed in solace when she felt Murphy move to the side, arm coming up to go back and massage her clit; Connor mimicking his brother went the other way hands coming up to pinch her nipples. This time instead of teasing, both gave her what she longed for in earnest, borderline painful from the strain. Kisses along her arm, teeth on her shoulder blade. Her belly was curling, about to give her what she wanted but she needed another push. Connor must’ve sensed it because his hand came down hard on her ass giving her what she needed to propel over that last hill. Her body clenched during her orgasm, her body sucking them both in, her throat bearing down on Murphy leading him to burst and have her drink him down. Her channel gripped Connor, pumping him, begging him to finish when he shook behind her splattering her insides. She let her body go limp, no longer caring if she were propped up.

“You all right, love?”

She didn’t want to move but hearing the concern in Murphy’s voice had her peering up, giving him a smile to let him know she was okay. Connor moved behind her, and she gasp when the rough material of a t-shirt was tenderly used to clean off the semen that had begun dripping down her leg.

“Let’s get inta bed, lass.”

“A little too late, isn’t it?”

The boys chuckled at her. “Fer sleep, lass.”

She shook her head. “I’m waiting for my limbs to solidify then I’m going to start on supper.”

Connor lifted her, gathering her in his arms making their way to the bed. “We’ll order in tanight, no need in exerting ourselves any further.”

She rolled her eyes. “We’ve been ordering in a lot lately.” She turned to Murphy. “What was the point of shopping today if we’re just going to order our food?”

He grinned at her. “So we can cook breakfast for ye in da mornin’. Come on, Sera, we know yer wantin’ ta cuddle in with us.”

Though it was true she snorted at them, her body’s tension melting when their skin was pressed against hers, swaddling all three of them in the comforter.

“We’ll stay like this fer a while, then we’ll get da mutt out there back in before he starts gettin’ too lonely.”

Her eyes drooped. “I might be asleep by then.”

“We’ll take care of ye.”

She smiled, happy enough to go to sleep like that when she rose up. “The stove! I need to shut it off.”

Connor rolled over, grinning. “Calm down, we’ll turn it off. Go ta sleep, aingeal.”

With that she allowed herself to relax again, her body settling when both of them laid beside her.

She yawned, their exertions reaching her. “I would let you, you know?”

Murphy sidled up to her back, Connor’s face falling into her hair as they got comfortable.

“Hmmm?”

She wasn’t sure which one said it, but she smiled in answer. “When you asked if I’d ever let you have me there, I would. It’s one of the things I’ve thought about, the three of us together like that, to feel  
you both at the same time.”

They both groaned aloud, Connor speaking up. “Yer gonna kill us, girl.”

She managed a soft giggle before her mind veered off, fatigue overtaking her.

She was roused by something jabbing her feet, her head was heavy, and she was about to fall back asleep when she heard a familiar whine. Turning towards the end of the bed, she saw Shep sitting up batting her feet with his paw. Her body protested, not wanting to leave the cozy swaddle. But at the light tap on her foot again she knew she’d have to force herself up.

“Okay, boy, you got to move so I can get up.”

The sheltie was happy to do so, bound on the floor, restless in waiting. She squints her eyes, seeing from the windows that morning was here, the sun’s rose-orange watercolor fading as it drew higher.  
“Poor thing, hope one of the boys took you out last night. Seeing how your ass of an owner passed out on you.”

Shep tilted his head to the side, one ear flopping while the other stayed upright. She smiled, petting his thick mane. She threw on some pants, grabbing a coat to throw over the shirt and panties the guys put on her last night. Gathering the leash, and stuffing her pockets with her stuff from the counter she glanced back at the sleeping figures. Meh, she didn’t want to disturb them. Seeing both her and Shep gone they’d know where she was, besides they looked too adorable when they slept to just wake them. She smiled, having Shep lead her down the stairs and outside.  
It had frosted again during the night, the windows and ground sparkling making her think of spider webs while it crunched beneath her feet. The air wasn’t as cold, a plus, and her nose not running or becoming numb. Thinking about it, January was almost over.

“It’ll be our birthday soon, Shep.”

Knowing that made her heart sink into the pit of her stomach, during her life the three of them never regarded it as just their day, but all of theirs. It was the day one became three, the day their parents actually became their parents. It was to be celebrated between them, not alone. And here she was without them, just a day telling her she was growing older, closer to expiring in the natural sense. She cringed at that. It was hard enough last year, her and Sapph aging another year, while Selene…Selene would stay the same age for eternity. It was a reminder that one was missing everything – one wouldn’t fall in love and get married, make them an aunt and uncle by having kids, wouldn’t find their calling and advance in their career, and then the trivial thing – one less person to call when she was sad or it was raining and wanted to chat, someone to hug and reach out for, no more holidays, no more smiles, nothing.

And certainly no more birthdays.

Except for this year Sapph was gone too, an equal reminder to how much she was missing. Her heart constricted, she was glad the boys understood, she missed her brother so much. That she was closed to breaking without him. They had entwined her with them, but where those parts were back together some of her remained frayed, and that’s where she needed Sapph. The fear of not knowing how he was doing seemed constant; she wore it like a second skin that had sunk into her. But she kept reminding herself that he said he’d call again. Her brother was many things but he wasn’t a liar, not to her, so she knew he’d keep his word. Yet there was the fact that she was still reeling from their last interaction.  
There were a million and a half things they needed to be worrying about, but the first on the list in her brother’s mind was apparently why she was being ‘whored’ out by two guys. His blunt truthfulness often made him a douche. It upset her knowing that’s how he was picturing the relationship. She hadn’t been like him or Len in the fact that she didn’t constantly seek out companionship, not romantically anyway.

When she had started dating Zach freshman year it didn’t bother her brother since they had grown up and been through grade school together he already knew what his character was like. Selene was the one that always had to watch herself. Neither her or Sapph could find the right person that fit within them, usually ending the relationship in less than a month. A whole month where Sapph would stick his nose where it didn’t belong, badgering the guy down or having his friends that were going to the same place keep an eye on them to see if her date fucked up.  
Sera even had to file herself as overprotective, hearing about the person beforehand – whether it was for said brother or sister and pestering them. But she didn’t care for this role reversal. She knew she wouldn’t be able to take much of it or she’d snap. She was hoping for sooner that her brother would learn to get over his qualms with her boys. He might not know them, but he could, and he knew her and her standards. He knew she didn’t look for a casual lay, that she sought contentment in friendship. Only this time it led to something more, that she found two good men instead of one.

_**Gif by ghostling** _

Sighing, Shep leads her around the corner, it was then she felt something. Within a millisecond, she felt her breathing pick up, her body crackling as it came to attention. By the time Shep growled and she twisted around to see the potential threat it had charged and tossed her into a deserted alleyway. She didn’t need to open her eyes to know who it was, the man’s sour breath invading her nostrils as large hands clasped around her neck. The chain of her necklace began cutting into her skin until she couldn’t breathe. She tried to keep calm as she tugged at the man’s hands, grunting as she tried to regulate her breathing. Her heart was going rampant – she had to do better, she couldn’t have a repeat of the bar. Her brain was going fuzzy, the inside of her eyelids heavy as pressure welled on her eyes.

_It’s early enough._

It was, what was happening to her were just signs that her body was panicking. But if she controlled herself her brain wouldn’t send a response to collapse on itself. She tried to exhale deep, relaxing in the grip as he began speaking.

“Вы думали, что сошли бы с того, что сделали? Что вы сделали с моим братом?” **(You thought you'd get away with what you did? With what you did to my brother?)**

She didn’t know what all was being said, her extent in the language not reaching that far but she knew the word for ‘brother’ and with that, she knew who he was. Opening her eyes she saw one of the men from the bar. Looking into his eyes she saw another man, one with a set of matching eyes looming at her from the seat of a police cruiser, giving her enough anger to spit in his face.

“Моя сестра.” **(My sister.)**

His eyes widened before he sneered at her. She was getting ready to fight back at least go limp so she could pull herself away when she felt her hand burn, the leash passing through her fingers quickly as Shep made himself able to bite into their attacker’s arm. He skittered back giving her the leeway to breathe and thought to try to make a break for it. But seeing Shep going back to the assailant pouncing on the man’s leg, she halted.

The thick accent wafted to her. “Stupid mutt.”

She heard clicking, her mind connecting to the cock of a gun, her mind became hyper-aware, anger controlling her actions, panic fleeing as she leaped onto the man’s back.

“Don’t you dare touch my fucking dog, you piece of shit! פּאַסטעך! געפֿינען!” **(Shepherd! Find!)**

He was smart enough to know she meant the boys, she knew that, but she saw how conflicted he was. The sheltie’s posture was hunched over, all legs stiffened, with his head lowered to the ground passing between whimpers and growls determining if he should follow her command or protect her.

“געפֿינען, יינגל! איצט!” **(Find, boy! Now!)**

With a glance back he took off, leaving her spinning as the man cursed in his rage to throw her off. It wasn’t that hard, especially when he pointed his gun in her side. She fell off, the back of her head bouncing off the ground. Her eyes blurred for a second, able to focus on the barrel of the pistol that was shoved in her face.

“Я не даю двух дерьмо, что они говорят - это кончается здесь. С этими твоими твоями, мы можем сказать, что нам нужно было защищаться.” **(I don't give two shits what they say - this ends here.** **With those fuckheads of yours, we can say we had to defend ourselves.)**

She had stopped paying attention to the words, deciding to concentrate on her escape. She found her chance – the way he was hovering – it gave her the opportunity to cock her leg back, shoving the heel upwards into his groin. She rolled over so he couldn’t pin her down, finding her balance to stand.

“You stupid bitch!”

Before she fully stood the mobster grabbed her ankle, yanking her backward, the sudden action leading her face to bash into the concrete. Pain blooming when she heard a crunch, she felt warmth running over her lips and cheek and knew she was bleeding. She didn’t get the chance to move again, one of his knees embedding itself in her back. Making her squelch in pain, he pulled her head back by the roots of her hair her spine about to break in half. She tried to turn over, roll him off, but her body was giving up, strength draining. She was about to scream for help when the Russian did it for her, feeling added weight on her for a second she glanced over to see Shep had come back this time going full force and sinking his teeth into the man’s neck.

_You stuffed it in your pocket, you had to._

She scrambled inside the coat, feeling around as fast as she could when she heard Shep’s yelp her fingers found the scales of her gift. Gripping it tightly she pulled it out, charging as hard as she could Sera flicked open the switchblade before driving it into the wound Shep created. Locking her arm around his neck, she pulled, a curtain of red streaming to the earth. She yanked the blade out, and though her heart told her otherwise she decided to add for good measure a stab to his eye. It went into the hilt, the blood making her lose grip on the weapon as the man sputtered spit and crimson from his mouth hand trying to hold the gaping hole in his neck together until he fell to the ground. She put the back of her wrist to her mouth, keeping in her tears and the bile that threatened to come up.

_His sins have made us monsters._

The tears did slip by then, she was about to cover her ears to muffle her sister’s voice when a soft echo from a shot rang out. Her heart stopped, and she grappled on the ground for the abandoned gun. Turning to her dog, she looked him over, there was blood in his mane from the struggle but she was sure it was his prey and not his. She assumed his ribs may be bruised but she would have to deal with that later.

“Where are they, Shep?”

His ears went back before he rocketed around the alley, running behind him she realized they were heading back home. She rounded the corner from the front of the building, expecting the worst, getting pretty much just that – the boys in their robes, Connor’s bloodied as he lay unconscious while Murphy stood beating the largest man from the bar with a toilet lid. Seeing he had the upper hand she went to Connor, testing his pulse, while finding his wrists split open all the way around, a set of handcuffs attached to them. She went for the robe’s tassel, using the knife she cut it in two, circling his wrist to stop the bleeding. Hearing a muffled groan she saw the man in blue getting up. She saw him reaching for the gun, eyeing Murphy with venomous intent.

_I’m already going to hell._

With that resolve she let her shaking hands pick up the gun she took, her aim better than her stance when it shot through his head. Sniffling, she went back to Connor, seeing the lump forming on his head.

“Aingeal.”

_**Found on Giphy** _

She swallowed the lump in her throat. “I’m so sorry.”

**[P.S. I will post more gifs later on - the ones I want I can't find so meh, I'll make them myself.]**


	16. If You're Lost, You Can Look, and You Will Find Me

**One of Three**

**Chapter 16 – If you’re Lost You Can Look and You’ll find Me**

**[Why did this take me so long? I swear, the further into the movie plot I get the more I struggle but…I wanted to get something out before all the winter festivities came. But thanks again to my betas – bleedingrose0688 and canadianjelly! Thank you for what you do with this project and basically hearing me ramble. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and for reading! Rainey Day Smiles I want to message you but the thing won’t let me but thank you!]**

“Besides all the swelling, there’s nothing serious for you to worry about. You won’t be feeling too great alongside the minor bumps and bruises you received to your body, when the anesthetic wears off, your face is going to give you a moderate amount of pain. I can write out a prescription –“

“No, thank you.”

The three of them had been stuck at the hospital for hours, waiting, all Sera wanted to do was go somewhere and rest. Somewhere safe, and that in itself was going to be a task now, and narcotics tossed in wasn’t going to help.

She poked the brace on her nose, her whole face felt like it had been scraped through glass, but her nose got the worst of it. “If I’m clear I’d rather just go back to the lobby so I can make sure my guys are okay.”

The way the old doctor’s lip straightened in a hard line had her raising her chin.

“Yes, well, if I’m to recommend anything at all, young lady, it’d be for you to get away from whichever one did that to you.”

Her mouth gaped. “Doctor, you’re out –“

“I see it all the time, almost 24/7 here, and you may have thrown in a few good punches but they –“

“You’re wrong; whatever scenario you have thought up of us you’re wrong. It’s my fault they got hurt –“she gestured to her face – “but this, this had nothing to do with them.”

They stared hard at one another, the old man finally relenting with a sigh. “Just be careful, I really do see enough domestic violence in here that I don’t need you to add on to it.”

She pursed her lips. “Note taken, may I leave now?”

The doctor gave a curt nod, and she slipped out of the room before he could comment any further. She couldn’t say it was a five-star hospital, but it did have a lot of business. And as Murphy had said while they were driving away, they wouldn’t ask questions.

_Just make bad assumptions, and stick their nose where it doesn’t belong._

She had wanted to stay and wait for Connor to be looked over, being taken back first with the most injury. But Murphy had pressed her to go on, that he’d make sure they both were taken care of. She was glad for it at this moment, wanting away from all the sick and hurt – nothing but misery in these halls.

Sera found both her boys in the main lobby; Connor laid back in a chair, exhausted, his wrists now bound in gauze. The leg that faced her quivered, she was surprised he hadn’t popped both his knees out of their sockets jumping from a damn roof. Murphy told her how he watched Connor jump while she had sobbed her apology, helping Murphy throw in the bag full of guns and wallets then Connor into her car. He had remained unconscious for the majority of the ride, barely coherent going in, but somehow here he was hurt – probably more so than he let on but alert and awake. Arms crossed with a small smile while he watched his brother sitting with a young boy on top of a gurney playing cards, while the boy gave pats to Shep between turns. She took note that both boys had bandages across their foreheads.

Her hand went for Connor’s shoulder, taking the seat beside him. “How are you doing, Conn?”

The smile stretched. “Doin’ fine, got da papers ta prove it.”

She nodded, her eyes drifting to the bloody robe. “Didn’t they think to give either of you some scrubs or something?”

He shrugged, not bothered by the stains. But she was – his blood, Murphy’s blood, the Russians’ blood. There was too much red mingling there. “I’m going to the nurses’ station.”

Connor tugged her back, and she was able to feel Murphy’s eyes on her.

“Don’t be doin’ that, aingeal.”

Her mouth had dried up, leaving it sticky and parched. “Do what?”

“Runnin’. We sure the hell ain’t.”

It was seeing them – like nothing was wrong. Yes, she would’ve been devastated if they were in a hospital bed, but this…the nonchalance of it as if it were no big deal that they had almost been killed. It made it that much more troubling.

“I’m not running. I just thought you two would want some clean clothes.”

“Rather have a smoke ta be honest.”

She snorted at Murphy. “We need to find somewhere safe for you guys to go.”

“Us.”

She fell back into the seat, hands going to her hair. “I want it to be that way, and we’ll keep it that way if that’s the way you want it. But this, the shit that just happened I can’t live in the daydream that the two of you will magically be okay through this. You nearly took a bullet to the head, Murphy,” she turned to Connor, “And you, you had to go and jump off a fucking roof.”

Connor sunk in his seat, his nose turned up: the scolded child. “Was protectin’ my brother.”

“I know. And you shouldn’t have had to. That’s the damn point I’m trying to make here.”

Murphy patted the boy’s shoulder before jumping off the gurney. “Too late fer that, told ye, yur stuck with us. Not leavin’ no matter what happens or shit ye say.”

She laid her head on the back of the chair. “I’m not saying anyone should leave. But you two need somewhere to recuperate for a while. And I need to figure what to do. We need somewhere safe to go.”

She was trying to be calm, to put her head on straight to know what to do and say. But she was floating, floundering if she were honest, because she had no idea what the hell to do. The only thing that was clear thudded in her ears like a heartbeat. They almost died. They could’ve died. They would’ve died. They’re going to die. All she could see was Connor on the asphalt, the gun pointed at Murphy while he scrambled with the toilet lid.

Holding back the tears, the pressure of them hurting her nose as she sniffled; sighing heavily, she felt an arm sling around her. Opening her eyes she turned to the owner.

“So what do we do, Murph?”

He gave a heartening smile, mole and cheek dimpling. She could feel the bandages that covered his fingers smoothing on her shoulder. It gave her the image of Murphy heaving the porcelain up, the rough cement inside digging into flesh each hit cutting him deeper. She gave the top of his hand a squeeze, head going to its place on his chest as he opened his mouth. Only to have Connor cut him off.

“Fuck ‘im, he don’t know what ta do.”

Eyes were narrowed with his brother’s brush off. “Fuck me? Fuck you and yer movie bullshit! Didn’t have no stunt double fer ye, did we? Better be rememberin’ who carried yer dumbass to da car. Ye ain’t like the girl; ye weigh as much as a walrus.”

“Oh, fuck ye, Murph!”

“Fuck ye, too!”

She shook her head, standing. “You both should be ashamed, cursing like that in front of a young child like that. I’ll be back.”

Connor reached for her. “Told ye, lass –“

“I’m not running, Connor. Not anymore. Even if you’re both okay with it, I…it’ll ease my mind if we get you into something else. I don’t like seeing –“she gestured at the scarlet stains. “That on you two.”

The boys nodded, solemn, making her reprimand herself for bringing them down. “How about you two come up with something, I may need to get Shep looked at. Stupid fuck kicked him.”

The boys grinned at her language. “Who should be ashamed, love?”

She snorted at them, walking away to the nurses’ station. Every light on the phone they had behind the desk flashing, each one jotting down something on a clipboard. Catching one she asked to be pointed in the direction where to get some scrubs, giving her name and how many so she wouldn’t bother them. She grabbed one of the shirt covers for herself, her top splattered from her nose as well as wiping Connor’s blood from her hands on it. She decided to toss her shirt in the trash when she changed out of it. She didn’t have a need to feel the sticky relic against her skin.

It was thin material, and she wished the boys had something to go over it. They were probably going to have to wear the robes out. She zipped up her own jacket, surprised when she turned the corner and saw Doc there. The elder man was hunched down patting Shep’s side. She smiled at him and the boy on that remained on the gurney before passing out the clothes.

Murphy grinned to her, gesturing to Doc. “’pparently da old man was holdin’ out on us.”

Connor chuckled. “Aye, came in and told him about da poor dog’s situation and says he used to be a vet back in Ireland.”

Her brows rose. “Really, Doc?”

He nodded, the movement more pronounced with the twitching in his face. “S’true sweetheart, came from a long line of farmers and the like; s-seemed ta fit that I take care of da animals t-t-there with them.”

“Then why did you decide to become a bartender here?”

Doc shrugged, Murphy lending a hand to help him stand. “T’was easier. Ye move to another country, they want ye ta s-s-spend extra money on their schoolin’. Didn’t have da money fer all of dat s-sh-s…Fuck! Decided ta just…t-ta…Ass! Easier ta play da part and open a bar. Used m-me savings and opened McGinty’s.”

She crossed her arms, nodding, her expression staid. That wasn’t fair, especially seeing how easy it was to see Doc fixing animals on a farm. Shep jumped on her side, scoping her to make sure she was alright. She smiled and scratched behind his ear. She heard Doc laugh.

“He’s fine, might be a tad sore, but nothin’ broken or need of care. May want ta give ‘im some c-c-c…baby as-as-Ass! Aspirin! Will help the pain just as well.”

She smiled at him. “Thank you so much, Doc. Who knows what Shep and me would have to do if you hadn’t shown up.”

Which begged the question…she turned to the boys. Murphy shrugged. “Ye wanted us ta come up with somethin’. We’ve been trying ta make one beforehand so we called Doc when you were gettin’ patched up.”

Her eyes went to Connor who was propped on the wall. “What are you thinking Doc can do?”

Murphy thrust the shopping bag up. “If it’s okay with him, hide this shit fer one. We’ll come after it when we’re done.”

Doc took the bag without question, making her eyes dart between the three. “When we’re done with what?”

“T-that’s what I was tellin’ these two, a man came to da bar today, gave me his card and wants ta speak ta all of ye.”

Connor held out the card letting her look it over. “So you want us to go to the police?”

“Was self-defense wasn’t it, aingeal?”

It wasn’t an actual question but she shrugged in answer. “From my experience the police aren’t much help in any of these matters. But if you guys think it’ll help…”

Doc took her shoulder, a fatherly gesture. “Dis man appeared ta know what he was doin’. Told dem here, he knew it was ye three defendin’ yerselves. He’s with da FBI might be worth takin’ a peek into, won’t hurtcha none besides.”

She patted his hand. “No, I suppose it wouldn’t. Thank you, Doc, for everything.”

“It’s no problem, lass. Can’t be losin’ me best customers now, c-c-c…Fuck! Ass! Can I?”

She smiled. “I’m sure you have better ones than them.”

“Hey!”

“Da fuck?”

She laughed at their expressions. Turning back to see Doc’s which had turned gentle.

“May be true, but at least it had a far better view since they started bringin’ ye in.”

She shook her head. “Oh, you Irishmen always turning on that charm. But get a few drinks in and all of you would confuse Roc with me.”

Connor balked. “One time, love, one time, and I was hammered beyond a fuckin’ nail.”

She grinned, turning to Doc and hugging him. “Be careful, those were the ones that came to the bar. But there could be more.” There’s always more. “I think I speak for all of us that we couldn’t stand it if something happened to you.”

“Don’t be worryin’ after me, lass. Might look decrepit, but I can pull a trigger as fast as anyone.”

“Good.”

“Ye t-t-three just better be headin’ ta da…ta da…Fuck…Ass! Ye three be on yer way.”

They had clamored out to the car, Connor fussing and Murphy laughing that the former got sent out in a wheelchair. Her car was another thing to add to the list, though sturdy, the station wagon wasn’t exactly inconspicuous for around here. She needed a smaller car, especially if any of the Russians had pinpointed it. But that was something for later.

Connor wanted to sit in the front with his brother, but she wasn’t having it. If she could when they got through at the station she wanted them both to get cleaned up and rest for a few days. She felt awful for both of them…But Connor right now, she was able to see his wounds the gash in his hairline, the bandages on his wrists, she wanted to help deal with him. Murphy…poor Murphy, his wounds would be internal, sure he had scrapes and his hands, but she knew he was processing that he had to take a man’s life today. Yes, it was in self-defense, he was protecting himself as well as his brother, but she knew it would haunt him somehow.

“Ye gonna sing me a song, aingeal?”

The only way Connor would lay in the back was if she was back here too. With his head in her lap she stroked his face. “I don’t think either of you would care for damaged ears.”

“Come on, love, fill the silence fer us.”

She could hear muffling and knew Murphy was speaking around his thumb. He was nervous, maybe scared, and it hurt. Situating Connor, she took off the seat belt to maneuver herself so she could fit an arm around the headrest letting her fingers run through Murphy’s scalp while simultaneously keeping a hand on Connor’s.

“סלאַמער אויף מיין טייַער אָנעס; שלאָפן אין שלום די גאנצע נאַכט דורך. טאַקעד אַוועק זיכער אין דיין בעדז. בשעת מלאכים וואַך אָוווערכעד, נאָענט ענג די אויגן פון בלוי. אַי עס ליו לי לו.” **[Slumber on my precious ones; sleep in peace the whole night through. Tucked away safe in your beds. While angels watch overhead, close tight those eyes of blue. Ai li lu li lu.]**

She smiled at the serene expression on Connor’s face, Murphy’s shoulders slumping in the seat like he had been soothed.

“See, knew it’d be a lovely thing ta hear.”

She moved her hand, cupping Murphy’s scratchy cheek in her palm, hearing Connor hum in agreement. “I think those doctors gave you both too many painkillers.”

“Ye know we wouldn’t lie to you. No point in dat. Sound better than our Ma, doesn’t she, Murph?”

“Aye.”

She bent down to kiss Connor’s forehead, the three remaining silent after that, giving him time to fall asleep. She knew they were almost there, but she needed that time with Murphy, to let him know that his trauma hadn’t gone unnoticed.

“Murph, you want to talk to me?”

“About what, love?”

His voice was too chipper, close to being forced. She tried to scoot closer, to hold him tighter. “I’m so sorry what you both had to go through. Seeing Connor the way he was, the way he is, I was terrified for him. I thought I lost him. But that doesn’t mean I’m not scared for you too. What you had to do…I know about that hurt. I just don’t want you to pull away, don’t feel it alone, okay?”

She could see his hands trembling on the steering wheel. “I’d never in a million years admit it ta anyone else. But I was fuckin’ scared.”

“It’s okay to be.”

“It wasn’t even about dyin’. I was afraid of not being there ta help Conn, to help you.”

“Oh, Murph.”

“Then ta see Conn’s stupid ass flyin’ down, I knew he was a fuckin’ goner. But he was breathin’ and so was that other fucker. I’d do it again, Seraphine, over and over if I had ta. The only regret is that ye had to fight that bastard by yerself. God forgive me fer it, but I’d be fine with killin’ all of ‘em.”

She wanted to tell him she had Shep, to tell him not to say things like that, to not want that. But he was in autopilot, survival mode, and she wouldn’t be able to tear those thoughts from him for a while. She could only be there to comfort him. So she clung to him from behind, feeling a hand come over her arm to squeeze back. They remained that way until they pulled up to the station’s steps.

“Yer gonna hafta help me ye dumbass!”

“Fuck ye, should leave yer ass here!”

There was no way Connor could walk up those stairs on his own, but his bedside manner was grating on his brother, especially with him throwing orders around. She rubbed Murphy’s back, trying to calm the tension out of the muscles.

“Afraid they’ll want to interview him too, Murph. Or I might be with you on that.”

“I can’t help that I can’t walk!”

“Well, I could go on about refraining from jumping from buildings. But, yeah, I know, Connor, we’ll help you. But you’re going to have to be less grouchy with your brother.”

“Grouchy? Ye talkin’ like I’m two.”

She shrugged. “Well –“

His reply was a glare. They were able to make it, Sera sweating rivers from trying to take the brunt of the weight. Even with Connor’s help he was so heavy, muscles, tendons, and bone taking him down.

“I swear to God, we’re finding you a bed after this Connor MacManus.”

There were two – “Lord’s name –“in reply.

“Don’t be swearin’ to da Lord for Connor’s stupid ass.”

“Aye, wouldn’t take much ta get me inta bed withcha again besides.”

She wanted to elbow that snarky grin from his face but entering the building she could hear men arguing back and forth.

“They’re scared like two little bunny rabbits. Anyone in a uniform or flashing blue lights is going to spook them. So the only thing to do is put a potato on a string and drag it through South Boston. Thanks for coming out.”

Her blood heated. “Oh, fuck your racist bullshit, asshole!”

The boys sniggered, Murphy piping in. “You’d have better luck with a beer.”

Connor grinned grasping their shoulders tighter. “Aye, they would.”

Many of the officers came to shake hands with the guys, letting her ease herself into the backdrop. She didn’t want to be here, what were they going to do anyways? Protect them? They had their chance with that, and failed. Maybe she was a scared rabbit now. The police were nothing more than an obstacle when it came to safety. And with the man she assumed was the head honcho approaching them after scrutinizing her from across the room, she felt tenser than ever.

“If we’re done with the tea party folks, I’d like to get them into interrogation.”

The men relented patting the boys on the back one last time before they were escorted to a private room.

“Can I get you three anything before we start? Coffee? Water? There’s a few boxes of doughnuts left from this morning if you’d like.”

The boys ambled at the chairs; three that were backed to the wall, Murphy pulled the one in the middle out for her. She was reluctant to take it, wanting to remain standing but she couldn’t say no to the humble gesture. They gave them own inspection of the man while they pulled out their own.

“Aye, coffee and doughnuts sound mighty good.”

“A cigarette too, if there’s one ta offer.”

She took note of the mindful way they were speaking. They remained kind, jovial, but were just as wary as her. The man came back in when they had taken their seats beside her, holding out a box and drink tray. There was no sugar, and she didn’t feel like asking, but the hot liquid was welcome since she had something to do with her hands. The same was solved when the man held out a silver case containing cigarettes; she shook her head when it came to her. They thanked him while lighting up, tossing the box between them, again she declined but was giving a powdered cake regardless.

“Gotta eat, love.”

Her stomach knotted at the thought, but picked at it for them.

“Now that we’re all situated, how about we introduce ourselves? If you haven’t guessed, I’m Paul Smecker. I left my card with your friend at the bar.”

Connor nodded. “Aye, ‘m Connor, this is me brother Murphy, and this is our girl Seraphine.”

She watched Smecker jot their names on his notepad, pausing to look back up at them. “Last names.”

“MacManus.”

“All three of you?”

He was staring at her, and she kept her gaze steady. “Shafir.”

He gave a small chuckle. “Doesn’t sound very Irish, sweetheart.”

She held back a glare. “It’s possible there’s some floating in my DNA somewhere. I’m mainly Polish, you know, lightbulbs, and how many people.”

“Just with your little outburst –“

“I’m not fond of stereotypical biases, Mr. Smecker. And, for the record, I’ve studied the Irish culture enough to say that making fun of a time, like the potato famine, when a million people died is kind of trashy, wouldn’t you say? But I don’t think you want me to turn this into a history lesson.”

The calculation that Smecker’s eyes held diminished, staying professional but more genial. “I enjoy history very much, but I’m more interested in the kind that’s relatively recent. If it’s alright, I’d like to begin.  
This conversation will be recorded; all I want is for you to answer to the best of your knowledge.”

Murphy held his hand out to pause him. “Excuse me, sir. Just give us a second before that.”

He peered at his brother first. “Quid enim ad eum de guns et pecunia?” **[What do we tell him about the guns and money?]**

She couldn’t tell what he said, but she knew it was a question. Connor, unfazed, shrugs him off. “Et nos iustus got reliquit. bum musta et surrexit ante vigilum advolvit ibi.” **[We just got up and left. Bum musta rolled them before the police got there.]**

Murphy gaze went to her then, switching to his native tongue. “Cad mar gheall ort, aingeal? Cé mhéad atá ag iarraidh a fhios aige?” **[What about you, angel? How much are you wanting him to know?]**

Her head lowered, flicking her eyes between them. “Ag brath. Cad a cheapann tú? Ar cheart dom a bheith i muinín air?” **[Depends. What do you think? Should I trust him?]**

Connor chimed in then. “Is fearr a thabhairt dó na freagraí a bhfuil sé ag iarraidh a dhéanamh dó, ansin téann muid as ann leis.” **[Best to give him the answers he's wanting, then we go from there with it.]**

They all nodded, Murphy turning back to Smecker. “Okay. We’re ready.”

“None of you are under oath here. But I’m going to assume you knew these guys.”

Connor nodded, putting another chunk of doughnut in his mouth. “Yeah, they introduced themselves the other night.”

“They had some…interesting bandages on, any of you know something about that?”

The boys turned to one another before giving their rendition of that night, nixing out the part about the picture and the exchange from it. Her brain went elsewhere, hearing and visualizing what happened to  
them, her throat burning with despair at hearing the fear hiding in Connor’s voice. So scared at how close he had been at losing his brother. The same fear pivoting to Murphy when his brother crash landed, it went to the point where she could relive it until Smecker tried to draw her attention back.

“What about you?”

She gave a pointed look. “What about me?”

“There were three men, from hearing this they took on two. That leaves one, and from the nail marks and bite wounds I can take a guess that the loner came at you. Correct?”

“Yes, and yes I was there. But I panicked when those fuckers started getting riled up. I have epilepsy, which is why I have my dog with me at all times, but the panic triggered enough anxiety that I had a small seizure causing me to collapse. I wasn’t too involved with that part of the mess.”

_Wow, what a liar you are._

“But the after - ?”

She exhaled. “I was woken early by my dog needing to go out. I was walking him when I was ambushed. I wasn’t even able to croak half a scream before he threw me into an alley. But with the time and the place it wouldn’t have mattered if I hollered myself hoarse. No one was out there, and even if so, no one would’ve helped.”

Smecker’s mouth gaped in disbelief. “Why do you believe that? People seeing someone in distress have more compassion than you may realize.”

“I’m not saying they don’t care at all, sir. But in that neighborhood it’s better to mind your own business or yours and your family’s safety could be compromised. I don’t blame anyone for that, I’m just stating fact.”

Smecker waved for her to continue, but she shrugged. “Haven’t you guessed the rest? I fought back, there was a point where I could’ve gotten away but he attacked Shep for defending me –“

“Shep is?”

She pointed to the sheltie that lied under the table. “From someone else’s perspective it wasn’t a smart move, but he wasn’t going to kill my dog. I pounced on his back to get him to stop when he flipped me to the ground. I kicked him between the legs to give me some time, but he yanked me back causing,” she motioned to her face, “this to happen. I-I don’t know what he was about to do the way he had me in place, but my dog had come back, and, again, he protected me. This time I was able to get my switchblade out and defend myself when he came at me.”

Smecker leaned forward. “You stabbed him twice.”

“Yes.”

“From the coroner’s report the wound to his neck was fatal enough, so why stab him again?”

Her teeth clenched, the questions causing the acid in her stomach to bubble. “Because he was still standing, are you saying it was wrong to defend myself?”

He shook his head. “Not at all, Ms. Shafir, I know that the three of you had to use force to stay alive. But I was trained to see things not everyone can, and from that wound I could see a lot of anger put in there.”

“He attacked me, he attacked my dog, and I knew he had people attacking my boyfriends, am I not justified in that emotion?”

He nodded a small smile tugging. “You are. I just believe it’s more personal than you want me to believe.”

She smirked back. “I’m sure you hate to hear this but you’re wrong.”

He laughed then. “That could be a possibility, but I hardly ever am, Ms. Shafir.”

She nodded slowly. It wasn’t conceit, it was truthful. She could tell there were more questions he wanted to ask, an expectant gleam in his eyes, he might’ve gotten around to asking them if one of the policemen hadn’t charged in.

“Sorry to disturb you, sir, but we got a problem.”

Smecker flicked his cigarette, sighing in exasperation. “What is it?”

The officer pointed behind him. “The press is everywhere out there. They’re going nuts for these guys. What do we do?”

Smecker’s eyes went to her before sliding over to both of the boys. “None of you are being charged. You want to talk to them?”

Her answer was immediate. “No.”

Connor soon joined her. “Absolutely not.”

“No pictures either.”

Bless you, Murphy. They didn’t need that on them either.

“We could walk you three out with bags over your head.”

She made eye contact with Connor before he shook his head. “Our mother can see through bags.”

Murphy licked his lips and nodded, the apprehension in his face told her the realization of their mother had just come to him. “Aye, she can…There any way we can stay here?”

Sera coughed on an escaped laugh as the officer’s eyes brightened, excitement taking over his features. “Sure, there’s an empty holding cell here. You can…can they stay?”

He asked that like a child asking a parent to let their friend spend the night and she shook her head in amusement. The boys seemed to think it was funny as well, huddling closer to her to hold in their snickers.

“We’ll have to check with your mom, but it’s all right with me if your friends sleep over.”

That got them then, the two busting out in a cackle. The officer flushed in embarrassment, leaving the room while Smecker stood.

“If there’s anything else you’d like to add, I’ll be here for a while; plenty of paperwork to keep me for the week while we wrap this up.”

His gaze wasn’t pointed at any of them, but she knew it was directed at her. When no one answered he grabbed his coat. “Well, time to feed the dogs.”

Murphy had went to make a phone call to Roc asking him to bring them all some clothes, while she and Connor were guided to the cell. She didn’t know what the codes were, but the cell couldn’t have been up to them. Two flimsy cots with barely a tissue cloth mattress stood side by side, a constant draft and wetness as moisture gathered on the wall, there was even a crack going up it splintering wider as it went.

She grimaced. “We could find somehow to get out of here. Wait for everyone to disperse, a back entrance…something.”

Connor cleared his throat. “We weren’t expectin’ ye ta stay, aingeal.”

She turned to him, perplexed. “What do you mean? I already said I’m not running, Connor. I know I’ve been flighty, but it’s just that I want you two safe.”

He put his hand over hers, smiling. “We know that, we want ye safe too. Which is why we’re gettin’ you out and havin’ ye stay with Rocco for da night.”

“What? No. I’m not leaving you two here in this dingy cage –“

Connor started to talk over her. “You’ll be safe with him, and we’ll have time to come up with a solution –“

“We need to focus on it together, not just –“

“This way you’ll have a breather, and not be –“

“One at a time works better!”

They both turned to Murphy, Sera’s eyes narrowing in on him. “You’ve decided this along with him, right? You both stay here, and leave me on my own?”

Murphy chewed the inside of his cheek. “Ye won’t be on yer own, Roc will keep a lookout for ye. I mean…ye know it’s not because we don’t want ye here.” He scouted the room. “I mean we don’t want ye in this  
kind of place, but we’re doing this fer you. Seeing how they were out there, the press outside…if ye stayed –“

“What’re you talking about, Murph?”

“Besides Smecker, everyone else out there believes we’re the only ones involved with this. Or the most think you were there but weren’t the main one to stick up ta anything. Three men down while two standin’ they’re not puttin’ much thought to ye right now, and we want ta keep it that way.”

Her mouth gaped. She hadn’t thought that much into it, but the way the men at the precinct behaved, they had believed it was the boys to take the Russians down. That all these steps they were thinking of her. “I’m sorry, I should’ve known you had your reasons. But I still would feel bad leaving you both here… in this.”

Murphy stepped beside her, squeezing her shoulder. “Eh, our first place was way worse than this. Plus we’ll have the guys waiting on us while we’re here, be like room service. Don’t worry about us, love, it’s just til mornin’ and we’ll meet up have us some breakfast and make a plan.”

She coughed a laugh, going in to hug him. “You know it’s kind of sad this is the first time we’ve really been apart since I moved in with you two.”

Connor snorted. “And why’s that supposed ta be sad? Were ye raring ta get away from us?”

“You know that’s not it, I just never pictured myself as the clingy girlfriend.”

“Ain’t clingy, we’d tell ye if ye were. We like ta keep ye close with us.”

Connor kissed her forehead. “While we’re waiting fer Rocco, how bout we get a card game goin’? Get us a few cigarettes stocked for da night.”

They had won several hands and a few packs of cigarettes before Rocco arrived. Cheers erupting from the boys when they were given a much warmer bundle of clothing, grins unfolding when Roc revealed their rosaries from around his neck.

His eyes wandered to her, and he nearly jumped back. “Damn, honey, what the hell happened to you?”

Murphy scoffed. “What ye think happened?”

He shimmied up to her, hands in his pockets. “I kept yours in my car, I promised the guys not to look at any of your delicates so I just shoved a bunch of shit in a bag.”

She laughed. “That’s fine, Roc.”

She turned to the boys, already tossing off the thin tops for their faded t-shirts. “I guess we’ll see you in the morning.”

It came out as more of a question and they smiled at her. “Aye, ye will.”

“Yeah, Roc will take care of ye, and if he doesn’t we’ll kick his ass.”

Rocco took one of the loose cigarettes they had one from the table. “Yeah, yeah, if I had all the hot air you two have I’d be able to make it to China and back.”

Connor’s face grew stern. “Just keep her safe fer da night Roc, and don’t be tryin’ anything.”

“Aye, twist yer balls off if we hear ye did.”

Rocco flung his hands up. “I ain’t gonna try anything! Jesus!”

“Lord’s name.”

The three turned to her and she couldn’t hide the smirk that came. The boys laughed with her. And with one final kiss to each of them and another threat on Rocco’s balls she followed him out of the precinct. She wasn’t going to say anything but the neighborhood was as rough as Connor and Murphy’s only now it was Italian instead of Irish. She was afraid this may put her in a disadvantage since she didn’t know the language. Unlike the loft, this was an actual apartment complex, many people shimmying by them to get to or from their homes.

“Gotta say, it’s not the greatest place…or the cleanest it’s probably a step up than how those botchagaloops of yours lived before meeting you though. Just don’t be thinkin’ me or Donna keep it like –“

“It’s fine, Roc, I really appreciate you letting me stay the night.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’d do anything to help you guys out.”

Giving him a one-armed hug, she uttered her thanks while being ushered into the apartment. She didn’t know what he was worried about. It wasn’t dirty, only lived in. Several empty bottles on the dining table, couch cushions sunk in, a few dishes in the sink, and a –

“Is that a cat?”

On cue the cat meowed, causing her to glance at Shep, his ears folding back.

“Yeah, it’s kind of Donna’s, your dog won’t like…kill it, will he?”

“No, my sister had a cat, Shep’s more traumatized of them than anything else so he’ll avoid it.”

Rocco chuckled. “You don’t sound too fond of them either.”

She smiled in reply. “I guess not, I’ve always been parcel of dogs. I’m a loyalist at heart.”

He set her bag by the couch, motioning for her to follow through the dining room to the kitchen.

“We don’t have much, but you’re welcome to it.”

“Thanks, Roc, not too hungry right now though. Might need to go and pick something up for Shep, unless you packed his food in there.”

He looked over his shoulder from the cupboards, sheepish with tinged cheeks. “Uh, no, didn’t think of that. But listen, I didn’t tell the guys this cause I know they’d freak, I got something to take care of for my boss. Shouldn’t take an hour or two, I can get something for you both then.”

“That’s kind of you, but I could probably pop out and get us –“

“No!”

She jumped at the raised volume, the cat scurrying away under the table.

He ran his hand through his hair. “Sorry, I got an earful of what would happen if I let you out anywhere.”

“Oh, did you?”

“Uh, yeah?”

She felt a little bad, the way he sounded it was like he expected her to beat him with a rolled up newspaper.

She gave a half smile. “Any other rules I should know about?”

He smiled back. “Nah, most were aimed at me anyways…so will you be alright here? Donna shouldn’t be back tonight, hell she’s been out for a few days so who knows what she’s up in. But you can have the bed,  
take a shower or something, and lie down - put some ice on that honker of yours til I get back. I-I can leave ya a gun or something if it’d make you feel safer.”

He had said it all in an offhand way, and though he wanted to keep it in there Sera caught the concern he had about his girlfriend. “You don’t have to do that Rocco. I’m more worried about inconveniencing you than anything else –“

“You’re not, hell like I said it’s just been me and the cat. Maybe he can crawl up your ass while you’re here instead of following me around.”

“Yeah, well, I said my sister had a cat. Not me. I like all animals, but I’m not too in like with the feline kind. Does it have a name?”

Rocco snorted. “Thought all girls liked cats…but no, Donna’s usually too fucked up to call it anything and I just call it cat.”

“No, we don’t all automatically like cats, they scratch, hiss, and stare at you like they’ll murder you…like now look at IT!”

She huddled back behind Roc, the cat’s green eyes narrowed into slits, ears turned back in aggression. Shep’s front paws kept tapping as he got nervous.

Rocco laughed. “I’ll throw him out if you want but he ain’t gonna do shit to you. Probably hungry, I got him some stuff, so I’ll feed him before I take off. You want anything particular to eat?”

“Not really. Though Shep prefers beef to any other dog food. But if you’re willing you can pick a few more ingredients I can fix us breakfast in the morning, and whatever you want for supper as a thank you.”

“You don’t gotta be doin’ all that.”

“But I want to Roc.”

“I won’t argue with you then. Can tell by how fat those two fucks are gettin’ that’d I’d be stupid to pass it up. If you’re settled in I’ll take off. Like I said it’ll just be a few hours.”

“That’s fine. I’ll be here.”

He went in like he was going to hug her, then thought better of it and pulled back. Making her laugh and pull him back in.

“You’re a good friend Rocco.”

He blushed twisting his keys before heading to the door, waving on his way out. Alone she went and sat on the couch, Shep folded himself against it, remaining wary of the cat as he laid his head on her thigh.  
She wasn’t sure she liked this. She had gotten used to people again, the boys always making noise, talking, hitting, laughing. Now there was silence. Trying not to be intrusive Sera looked around the apartment. It was snug, cozy, in its own way, there was a tv in the bedroom, but she had decided she would take the couch. Besides not wanting to burden him, she didn’t really want to sleep where Rocco was getting laid in. He was right when there wasn’t anything in the cabinets a few odd cans of beets and green beans but nothing substantial. She never understood this, if men loved to eat so much how come they never had groceries stocked? It was bizarre to her.

She almost shrieked when the cat bumped her leg, rubbing its face on her ankle. Rocco had been in a hurry and forgot about the hungry creature, so she went about fiddling in the bottom shelfs until she found the bag Rocco was talking about and scooped it some food. Its basic desire sated she walked out of the kitchen with an eye on the cat. Sure, it was an irrational thing, but try being a kid giving a cat a bath. She stayed away from them after that. Finding a record playing to flipped through the options before settling on an old Frank Sinatra, hearing the scratching as the needle started to circle she continued to wander when Blue Eyes started the vocals.

_‘It's very clear_   
_Our love is here to stay_   
_Not for a year_   
_But ever and a day.’_

Patting her hand on her hip to the rhythm she watched the sun begin to disappear, clouds beginning to move in. It was going to rain, hard if the dark grey was any indication. She was nervous, a bumbling pile of nerves that needed to be worked out. Thinking of her mother and the way she passed the time, she found a bucket and threw in some soap and scalding water and set to work around the house. She wondered if the poor woman felt this way all the time, her mom had always been constantly moving, never satisfied doing nothing. Work was her meditation, and the house and her family were her yoga. Sera was surprised the woman hadn’t had a stroke. Adding a finishing touch she threw a crocheted afghan over the couch, the cat making her stumble backwards as it jumped on it. It kneaded the arm of the seat, starring at her with hooded eyes almost begging to be touched.

Len’s cat did the same, and though, with her sister’s forgetfulness, Sera would be the one to feed it, the thing would always lash at her – grabbing her hand in its paw with nails sunk in to bring it to its mouth, giving a small lick before chomping. Her sister had named it Hippo, it was gray with blue eyes and a very pink nose, it had been sweet as a kitten but as it grew bigger and wider it became more vicious to the hand that fed it. It was like each pound it gathered more meanness entered him. This cat was half Hippo’s size, she knew if needed Shep would be no help, the dog remembering enough about the claws to stay out of it. But against better judgement she stuck her hand out for it to sniff, rubbing its cheek along her hand when it got her scent. It stretched out, yawning, nails embedded in the fabric while it walked along having her hand touched its back and along its tail before coming back to repeat.

“You’re not so bad, are you?”

It blinked, continuing to purr. Thinking to quit while she was ahead she pulled away, sighing, it was reaching the hour mark. Perhaps she’d take Roc on his offer – when cleaning the bathroom she wanted to moan at the sight of the bathtub. After getting used to taking showers, nothing sounded better than a good soak.

“Are you going to stay with the cat, Shep?”

The answer was a hard no when he scampered off the floor, paws sliding back off the hardwood to go after her. Turning the water on to let it heat, Sera gathered some towels, and found some bubble bath in the cabinet. Putting in the stopper, she swooshed her hand in the water to get the bubbles going, the smell of something akin to lavender and jasmine hitting her she stripped down, Shep taking ownership of the discarded clothing as he made his bed from them.

Pinning her hair up, she got in, soaking up to her shoulders in the hot water. Sera moaned low, the heat working its way into her bones, the stiffness fading. She laid her head back on the rim, watching the water rippling each time she moved. The tenseness was still there, she felt awful that the boys were staying in a cell tonight; she felt terrible what they had to do to even end up there in the first place. She slid further in the water, the smell of flowers taking her elsewhere. There were too many things to dwell on, and she needed to push forward. They would have to be better armed, better prepared for when this happened again. Bringing her hands up to her face she was surprised by how wrinkled her fingers had become, sudsing her hands she washed herself being wary of her nose before rinsing and climbing out of the tub. It did make her feel better, sloughing off the day, her muscles less achy and bundled, her bones more lax.

She was becoming concerned about Rocco, the storm had blew in now, the pitter patter hard against the windows making it hard to see anything outside. Who was she to call for him? He left no number, Sera was sure he had a pager but she had no idea the number for that either. Plus he was a grown man, the timeframe given wasn’t set in stone, she didn’t have any reason to worry for him. Going through the fridge she found a lone egg and a piece of bologna that was getting rubbery around the edges. She fried it, making sure to clean the skillet, before splitting the egg with Shep. She divvied out the meat between him and the cat who looked pleased to be included in the meal. She decided on some hot water to drink down with her food to keep the warmth inside her, before settling down on the couch.  
Throwing the afghan over her legs, Shep bounded up to curl between her legs, nestling between the cushions she gasped when the cat jumped to lay on the back. Tentatively she reached out to stroke its cheek. Shep whined, his jealousy coming out she smiled and let her other hand scratch his neck.

“What do you think, Shep? Should we give him a name?”

Shep exhaled deeply, muzzle on her knee not giving a care either way.

“I don’t know much about you, but you’re kind enough – how about Gus? It seems to fit enough, like an old man that only looks grumpy but has a good heart.”

The cat only purred in answer, eyes closed and ready to sleep.

Her hands fell away, going back under the covers to be warm in a familiar cocoon.

“Fine, Gus it is then.”

_Remember now, weak can mean many things – it can be someone who lacks physical strength, a low standard, not convincing, um…_

_A coward._

_Yes! A coward._

_But I wasn’t a coward was I?_

“I wasn’t weak, was I, Sera?”

Her heart pounded, not just by the voice but by the question, and she struggled to keep her eyes closed. The voice continued to go on, as if not wanting an answer.

“Even when we were little it was like I had to try harder than you both to prove it. Like when you and Sapphire wanted to camp out in the tree fort Popop built for us. I didn’t want to, was terrified of what would happen to us in the dark, but I went with you. I kept telling myself that you’d both protect me, you and him always protected me. Looking back, it was rather silly to be afraid, but it’s in our nature to fear the unknown. But we made it, didn’t we? Only…” The voice was trying to stifle a giggle. “Only it ended with me losing step on the ladder and fumbling down on top of you. I broke my arm and you broke your ankle. Oh, you were so upset with me, Sera…”

The voice stopped, as if pondering. Sera wanted to open her eyes, but this…illusion, hallucination, whatever it was; she didn’t want it to stop.

“I couldn’t be like either of you, and when mom…after her, I didn’t want to be like them, do you see? You said it once yourself, we couldn’t turn into them. They liked the blood they had on their hands, but I didn’t want to dirty them at all. I couldn’t understand what made them so evil, they were like us once – they were children, they had a family, went to school, rode bikes, and had romances. What changed them? And did it change us? I think it changed you, Sera. Especially when I…we don’t have to go into that. But did it make me weak? To not want to kill them? To rather run, and stay away than face them? He’s made me see now that it won’t stop, not until he’s gone and been judged and put away from here. He’s telling your new, uh, friends about that. But He’s letting me talk to you. You used to call me crazy when I said He talked to me…not crazy, you and Sapphire both wouldn’t say anything but I knew you never believed me about it. When you said I was weak, that I was giving up…after everything that I told you.  
Don’t be afraid; don’t be afraid to let yourself feel something, to be happy just because we’re not there with you. Because we are, in a way, I think it’s because we were made that way, while being molded inside of mom, but I can feel you. Lately your joy, that giddy feeling of falling in love, I’m so happy about that, Sera, happy for you. It’s made me smile for days. But I feel your fear and your sadness too. That pulsing rage that hasn’t died since the bridge, yes, I saw it. I saw you there. I don’t mean to sound petty, but – weren’t you weak then? Didn’t you give up? Oh, heavens I do sound wretched…I just – it hurt so much when you said that, and I wanted to prove you wrong, the both of you wrong so that’s why I did it. Why I didn’t say anything. I wanted to be the one to save you for once. But He was right, yet I did do it. And what I did, knowing what would happen, I’m here to say it wasn’t a weakness, it was agape if it were anything, Seraphine.”

“You were never weak, Len.”

Her voice was strangled, and she noticed the talking had ceased, opening her eyes slightly, she saw her sister’s silhouette. “Hi.”

She saw that small smile only Selene could give. “Hi.”

She felt hot tears streaking her cheeks. “I’m so sorry.”

Selene shook her head. “Why? Weren’t you listening? It was my decision – I would do it over and over if I had to. I-I just wish you and Sapphire were still together.”

“Me too. I suppose he believes he’s protecting me. The same as I did to you. I pushed you away when you needed me. When you confided those dreams to me, hurt you thinking it would erase the possibility of it happening and, at the same time, make you stronger. But it doesn’t, does it? I know it shattered me when he left. I’m sorry if I made you feel like that, I’ve never stopped being sorry for it. Sorry for not seeing the sudden change in you, especially up to the moment on those steps, that look in your eyes…why couldn’t I see something was wrong? I wanted so bad for it to be over that I stopped seeing the signs of danger. I wish I would’ve done more…I regret so much, and I can’t do anything about it. I’m just sorry, I’m sorry Selene, it should’ve been me –“

She felt the cold ghost of her hand brush through her hair, knuckles pressed to her cheek. “I told you, it wasn’t for you. You’re meant for more here, Sapphire is meant for more here…me, I was meant for greater things elsewhere. And I like it there, I miss you, both of you, but you’re still with me as I am with you. Just know that I am happy, Sera, we all are, and let yourself be happy knowing that. It’s time you let the magic come back. You said you wanted to find it again; it doesn’t have to be snake oil anymore. God sent you in the arms of good men to prove that to you. Just let your mind have it, it’s not just stories, but a reality, a way of life that can bring us joy and safety. You’ll be safe again one day, and you’ll see.”

“I-I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I can’t be the last one, Len. It’s selfish, but I can’t be alone. I’d rather rot in the ground than be stuck here by myself.”

Selene’s bottom lip pursed, smile intact. “But you wouldn’t be alone you –“

“I already have to this without you, but I can’t…not with Sapph gone too.”

Selene let out a knowing giggle, the sound making Sera’s spine tingle in the familiarity. “Oh, Sera, you know, I always thought it was our brother that was bad at making quick assumptions –“ Sera’s head tilted to look at her sister stooping down. Those gold flecks in such similar evergreen eyes glinting at her. She wanted to reach out, touch her, hug her, not let her get away, but she was too frozen, in shock and fear that the apparition would disappear. “I did say you’d be the last of us remaining, but I never did say when. You only assumed it meant now, during this, but who’s to say it’s not 30, 40, or 100 years down the road? You need to quit being so dismal in your thinking. The Lord knows what and how much we can handle. Let him guide you in that. Put the fear of loss aside, Sera, let it make you strong again.”

She felt Selene’s lips on her temple, warmth rushing to her entirety. “You were always the strong one, please know that, Len.”

“As long as you know that there is good and good people out there, know that you are one of them.”

Sera nodded, opening her eyes to a dark room.

“Len?”

Shep sat back to let her up, it was real, that had been real. She felt her sister here.

And you thought I was crazy.

She had, all those premonitions of Len’s were merely her imagination, but now…She went over to turn the lamp on, finding no trace of the interaction that had occurred.

“Oh, Shep.”

It hurt - the loss again, but it was also a good ache. It was hope.

Searching the bedroom she saw Rocco had not returned and though she was concerned she was also fueled. Peeking out the large windows she saw the storm had moved on. Another sign.

“Let’s go for a walk, Shep.”

Up for it, he barked, frantically speeding in circles for her to hurry and attach the leash. She still had the pocketknife Murphy had given her, under forensics the blood probably remained, but she had washed it  
with bleach after washing Roc’s dishes the steel now as shiny as the day it was purchased. Putting it in her pocket she wrapped her coat around her, flipping the hood in case it was drizzling. It was an aimless walk, letting Shep lead her until she felt she was at their destination. She kept her focus, around her, the slickness of the ground, a few cars honking at one another at the intersection, a group laughing outside one of the restaurants. After crossing the street several, zig-zagging across the city, she felt her legs tiring; Shep had begun to pant heavier as well.

“We need to rest, boy.”

He tugged her forward, her eye catching on a steeple, stained glass windows greeting her. It had to be past midnight, but it appeared the place was open.

Gripping her jacket tighter, she relented. “May as well.”

It was open, a few wary souls like her wandering here to pray. She let her legs buckle as she took a seat in one of the empty pews. The smell of wood and incense wafted up to her, relaxing her, and she let herself doze in peace. Her mind going over her own revelation, her sister – she admitted to herself that she felt so light, a heavy burden diminished. It wasn’t her fault, it wasn’t God’s fault. And though it would be easy to keep the blame on those that waved their guns, she held back, seeing them as Len had – as people. Bad people, but still human. Finally, she felt cleansed, she felt real again. Maybe the magic was coming back to her.

“I know you.”

She startled, jerking up to see a man staring at her. Well, not just a man, but a priest, and she had seen them before.

“Yes, you came to speak at my boyfriends’ church.”

The man smiled. “That’s right, Macklepenny, I think I can say that I’ve never seen many people bring in their dog with them to the services.”

“Uh, he’s a service dog, no pun intended there, sir. But I take him with me everywhere, if you need to see my card –“

The priest held up his hands. “Oh, no, no, I wasn’t trying to make any accusation. I’ve never seen it though, but I love dogs, he’s a beauty too.”

Shep stood prouder, as if he understood, making Sera smile and stroke him. “He is, and loyal.”

Macklepenny nodded briskly. “I hope I may be forward in saying I haven’t seen many men stand at the services either, from what you said you are taken with one of them then?”

She blushed, the technicality in her grammar must have made it singular, but she wasn’t going to correct it. “Yessir, I hope you don’t take offense of it, they’re both very devout to their faith and to the church. I was a bit stunned by it as well at first but no one there seems to mind.”

“No! I’m sorry, I keep putting this in a bad light…I was honestly quite surprised by it but when it was explained to me I understood. No just the three – or the four of you isn’t something that I see often. It’s a breath of fresh air to me.”

She laughed. “I’m glad then.”

“So how about you?”

“Um, how about me what?”

“You said the gentlemen were devout, but you never mentioned yourself.”

She petted Shep to calm her. “I’m getting better at it, I had a bit of an epiphany tonight which I guess was the guidance to bring me here. But I – I hope you don’t…well…I’m Jewish, but I attend with the guys  
because they’re Catholic. I’m becoming engulfed in both religions it seems.”

He seemed off put but quickly regained composure. “There’s nothing wrong with that, we’re all God’s children.”

Emboldened she pressed. “What does confession do?”

His brows rose. “Pardon?”

“Confession, I’ve been lightened in my mind, but I would like to absolve myself out loud.”

“Confession is to allow the Lord as well as the person to forgive their sins, simultaneously releasing themselves from the binds of it. As a daughter of Judaism you know you do not have to confess your sins of a  
daily basis –“

She tried to make light of it, and failed. “I know, sir, but Yom Kippur is a ways a way…I’ve sinned much worse than coveting or eating grapes from the market without paying.”

Macklepenny took the adjoining pew, facing her. “And what sins are you wishing to confess then, my child?”

Sera sat a little straighter. “Before we begin, Father, these things are…um, confidential, right?”

The poor man became more fidgety. “Of course, the Seal of Confession stays within the confines of this church as it is with you and I.”

She nodded, taking a breath. “Good, I just needed to be sure.”

With that she began to relay her story to him, every feeling, every action, and consequence that followed her to this point. Soon his eyes went to the floor nodding when the occasion called for it, his brow furrowed while he hummed in acknowledgement and when she was done his gaze slowly lifted back to hers.

“You have been through quite an ordeal.”

“Many of my loved ones have…I’m concerned that it will continue to be that way for them.”

“We must let God guide the way in these times, it may not be easy, or have the result we search for but it is His will. He knows what is best for us.”

“But how do we know which is His will?”

Macklepenny smiled. “You must give yourself time to obtain the answer; you’ll know when it comes.”

Sera huffed. “No offense, Father, but I’ve been out of touch with this for a while. And what I’ve told you, what choice am I supposed to make when another gun is shoved in my face or someone is attacking my  
loved ones?”

He cleared his throat in discomfort. “No matter how much time passes, once you’ve accepted the Lord, He stays within you for eternity. He’s guided you, Lucifer may have you thinking otherwise, but you’ve made your decisions based on the need of others not yourself those actions say who’s been aiding you in your answers. The things you’ve had to do, no one can imagine, each person is different in their trauma. But it isn’t bloodlust, you may have exacted revenge in an attempt to gain justice of your sister…but it was your grief that did that. It was an action of love in the end, and you telling me the guilt you feel for so much of it now speaks volumes. A sensible person would tell you to go to the police, but from what you told me…I can’t tell you what to do. All I can say is to stay on this path, allow the sheet of guilt and grief fall and embrace the possibilities you can have. Let that be what drives you.”

“Thank you, Father.”

She stood, Shep leaping up to go.

“I’m sorry I can’t give you all that you’re looking for.”

“No, Father, you’ve helped me more than ever…I know God isn’t a magic 8 ball. He can’t give a straightforward answer, but thank you, just for listening. That’s helped me more than anything to have an impartial to hear me.”

“It’s no problem. And please, child, just remember – the Lord doesn’t decide what he does to help his children, but to save them.”

Her face remained blank, but she nodded. Bundling herself back in for the brisk cold the night would have. Rocco had to be back by now, but she didn’t really want to head back there. It wasn’t home, it was flat – in addition, it was empty, and after the tumbling of events tonight she didn’t want to be alone. So instead she decided she would go back to the police station, the press had to be gone, and she could just sleep out in the lobby. But she needed to be close.

“I am the clingy girlfriend, aren’t I, Shep?”

Cold air billowed out of his snout, his head to the ground finding any scent of new friends. After several blocks her posture began to bristle, goosebumps rising to the surface. She was being followed she was sure. Again? This soon? She tried to act casual, adjusting her speed up slightly and inclining it after each block. She put her hand in her pocket, gliding her fingers to the button on her knife. IF the opportunity came she’d scramble, but she wouldn’t hesitate to defend herself. She saw the figure of a man, his outline covered by a huge hooded coat, the black fading with the night.  
She couldn’t kid herself she needed a taxi, the station was over ten miles and there was no way she’d be able to jog that far. But the block she was on was quiet besides a few stragglers being ushered out of a bar nearby. Stopping at the four-way she glanced in all directions to plot where to go, feeling a hand on her shoulder she lashed out getting the person’s hand who leapt back with a yelp. She turned to continue her attack when she was overpowered, the assailant going for her wrist, pinning her at the sidewalk post.

“You’ve lost your touch. Gotten soft, I like it.”

Her mouth gaped open, her body shaking and heart stammering at the voice.

“Sapph?”


	17. Do You Remember You at All?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I want to apologize for such the long, very long delay. There is no one explanation, just, life's hard. Being an adult is hard, and when you're mainly depending on yourself days turn chaotic until you have no time for yourself to relax, let alone think. But I am sorry, and though I do regret that this chapter will not reach the 100,000- word count - my very first - I want to prove that I am still here and in this. I am determined to finish this story and I hope you'll still be here for it. Thank you for all the lovely comments and my wish is that it will continue to entertain all of you. And a special thanks to bleedingeyes0688, she not only helps me with writing, but her kind words and email break up my monotonous life so thank you for that! :D

**One of Three – Chapter 17**

**Do You Remember You at All?**

_“Flight 480 to Brighton Beach, New York has been delayed. Departure time will be postponed up to ninety minutes. Thank you for your cooperation.”_

_“_ Thanks _my ass –“_

_Sapphire couldn’t help but mumble various obscenities at the intercom. He had already been waiting nearly two hours for the plane to touch down, now he had to wait for another just to get on? It was ludicrous, it was also maybe karma. Rubbing his eyes, he let his head fall a little too hard on the back of the plastic chair. It had been a last-second compulsion to leave, but at the same time, it wasn’t. He had stayed in that hospital for three weeks waiting for his sister to start breathing on her own again. He couldn’t lose her, especially not when Selene’s death was still fresh. He knew what would happen if he stayed, Sera would deny it, but she was downright reckless anymore. It wasn’t just Len, it was just her, this last incident – it changed her._

_She didn’t care anymore, it was as if her life didn’t matter to her, but he did. She would walk through fire to help him,_ her _only fail safe to keep him alive. But he couldn’t do, not after seeing her so broken. The way her eyes had pinned onto him while she tried to remain conscious – just as she was trying to save him, he couldn’t let her ruin herself either. So the only thing that made sense was to take himself away from the picture. Maybe then something would jog inside her mind that she needed to keep herself safe –alive._

_“I know you’d do anything for your sisters.”_

_His father had been proud of him for saying that, though he had mixed emotions – mostly fury – but he stood by that. He would do anything he could, even if it hurt him._

_“So what, this is it then? You were just going to leave?”_

_His back went rigid, neck flinching towards the voice; knowing he would see his sister’s numbing stare._

_“It’s better this way.”_

_He held back a flinch at her steps forward. “Better? Are you serious? I’m not sure you remember but I’m your sister! The only family you have left, not some girl you found at a bar and wanted to ditch!”_

_He stood up, jaw tightening at the rushing crowd pausing to look at them. “How’d you even –“_

_Sera held up her hand to stop him. “Troy doesn’t just talk to you.”_

_He wanted to scowl. Troy Brooks. The fucking old man was a savior as well as a cursed burden. Brooks had been an E-8 Senior Master Sergeant in the U.S. Air Force, working during the Congo Crisis as well as the Simba Rebellion after returning he reframed from going back. Images of having to gun down, not only men but whole families including children armed to defeat their own relatives…it haunted him. He had worked successfully for eighteen years in the U.S. Marshals when he suddenly had been let go. His colleagues shaking their heads at him, Brooks said, acting like he was a child that had a tantrum. He had been diagnosed with severe PTSD alongside alcoholism, making his moods abrupt and more towards violent. In a chance occurrence his name had been brought up, and with nothing that could be lost Sapphire and Sera had sought him out. Besides weapons, they had been given locations of safe houses, papers and ID’s, list of employers, cell phones that were made overseas as to not be as easily traced, just an abundance of items. Sera had started to adjust; her wounds were still inhibiting her giving him enough time to make it where he needed. He told Brooks to look out for her, but the rat fuck turned coat on him in the process it seemed._

_He was seething, at Troy and at his sister. “You think I want to fucking do this! You haven’t left me much of a choice.”_

_“Me? Do you want to put the blame on me? So what exactly caused me to justify you turning your back –“_

_“You got fucking shot!”_

_More people were looking at them now, and he tried to lower his voice. “You not only got shot, you had to play the dense ass martyr and lead them away. I heard you out there in the woods hollering like a wolf: you were beaten to a pulp before they shot you and threw you off a fucking bridge, all because you were a fucking idiot. Have I left anything out?”_

_He felt a gust leave him, watching his sister blink back her tears. “Yeah? How about the fact that I did it for you? I was finally given the chance to save you; I would’ve done it for both of you. But I can’t, I couldn’t because I wasn’t given the choice to do so. I did back there and I picked you, Sapphire. I knew how close they were on you, and I knew they weren’t going to hesitate to take you out. So what I did…it’s the best choice I could make, and I’d do it again.”_

_He felt so depleted, knowing his sister’s reason was valid. That he was a hypocrite but he shook his head. “And that’s the reason I need to go. I love you, נומער צוויי. You’re right we’re all each other has, and that’s why I refuse to let you get hurt because of me.” **(Number two.)**_

_Sapph heard the flatness in his sister’s laugh. “Are you really that blind? This does hurt, Sapph.” Her voice broke and he felt his chest collapse. “And it’s more painful that it’s you. You hurt me.”_

_He tried reaching out to her but she wrenched away. “So go on, run away and when they have you, they aren’t going to make it quick. No, not anymore. They’ll draw it out. I want you to pay attention to the hunger you feel as they starve you; the helplessness as they dangle you around like a cat toy; the weakness you feel as they slowly drain the life from your body – that’s what I want you to think of so you know how much you hurt me.”_

_He grabbed her elbow, this time locking it in his grasp. “Stop this! Stop your melodramatic bullshit._ I’m _sorry okay? I didn’t want this to hurt you, but I’m not having your blood on my hands because you’re too careless to notice anything anymore. I have to do this, and when this is over, and you can forgive me we can find somewhere to settle…be normal. Until then –“_

_Sera hissed through her teeth. “Don’t you dare…You could’ve stayed, explained this. No, I wouldn’t have been happy, and yes, I would’ve fought you about it. But you decided to be a coward, Sapphire. You’re a coward, running away. But I’m going to do you one better. You know, you had the one thing that our sister, our entire family never had. And you don’t get it now – you don’t get a goodbye.”_

With that, she had turned and left; he learned a week later, from Lilly, of her own departure from Florida. It had taken nearly a month to find her, but they had -  
They had, and looking up from his coffee he was wishing he had stayed hidden. His sisters had been many things but stupid was never one of them. A few questions and her hugs and tears of elation had turned to vicious blows, his left eye puffing up and accompanied with the cast on her nose they looked like they had been mugged. He was just grateful she hadn’t kept using the pocket knife.

“So what was the point of you leaving if you’re only going to turn around and stalk me?”

He scoffed, though dully. “Wouldn’t call it stalking, it was more keeping tabs. I was worried; you left without telling anyone where you were going.”

She gaped at him. “Are you being serious with that? After the shit you pulled?”

“I was doing it out of concern. You know as well as I do you weren’t yourself. You were going off the deep end. I did what I thought I had to. I’m not going to apologize for what I was trying to accomplish, I am sorry it hurt you. But it worked, didn’t it? Moving with a fresh start you started taking care of yourself again, you started working again, you became a normal human being again.”

“And I thought about you the whole time! What you went through in that brief moment of not knowing where I was I went through for months! And you were right here, watching, knowing all the ins and outs that happened. How many times have you seen me break down because I was miserable not knowing how and where you were? Did that even matter to you, Sapph?”

He slammed his palm on the table, making the patrons at the counter jump and turn to look at them. Let them. “Of course it did, Goddammit! But I had to make sure you were okay, I had to see if you were adjusting right –“

“What does that even mean?”

He leaned back, his eyes trying to convey the concern, the haunting. “Sera…You do know…What you did, you were throwing your life away back there. It may as well have been suicide.”

“I was not –“

“You can put it out there that you did what you had to for my sake, but when I was down there with you waiting for the ambulance to get to us I saw that look on your face. It was like you were relieved, you were happy that you were bleeding out. I can’t forget that. But seeing you here, I can tell it’s been hard, that you became more reclusive but it’s something. You found a routine, you even had those girls at work to talk with, but then you had to throw it out the window by being a good Samaritan.”

She reared back in shock. “You’re really going to blame the boys for this?”

He wasn’t sure what he was doing. “Might as well, they’re the real reason you stayed, wasn’t it? If not for them you would’ve been out of there. The fuckers wouldn’t have found you and targeted that woman. You wouldn’t have stuck your nose in her business and found her, leading to THEM finding YOU. They had you right where they could’ve –“

“Sapph…”

He blinked at Lilly, her tone a warning and telling him something before his vision came back to the present to see his sister’s head bowed, hearing her sniffle.

“Sera?”

“Is that all you’re here to do, Sapphire? Blame me, the people who have cared for me? I never meant for anyone to die here. Definitely, not someone who was basically a stranger to me, I hate myself for that, and her tied to that chair, dying, will haunt me. I will agree that my boys had a good amount with me digging my heels in the sand. But I’m so tired. I’m tired of sneaking around looking over my shoulder when I pass a corner. I want this over with, and somehow, for some unknown reason to me I was given two people to give me the strength to fight this.”

His heart sank, and he sputtered. “If that’s true, then I’m glad, but do you actually know these guys?”

“I know enough, Sapph. Please, I don’t want to fight about them with you, I don’t know why you want to fight about this.”

_Alive in the fact that she’s still breathin’._

He wasn’t sure which one of them had said it, but as soon as he heard them he wanted to laugh. All that time spent he had felt it too, felt as if he had become disconnected, so it had been close to welcoming that his sister had felt the same. But he was scared. Sapphire had watched enough interactions to know how his sister changed around the two. She was happy. He could fight for her, watch out for her, even kill for her – but being miserable for such an extended period of time, he wasn’t sure he could make anyone happy. And that made him something akin to jealous to the two.

“I just want you safe.”

Her eyes were still glassy but she tried to smile at him. “I am, as well as I can be.”

They sat in companionable silence, having their coffees refilled before Sera turned to look at them.

“So…the apartment?”

He raised his brows over the mug as he took a sip. “Hmm?

“My apartment, you’ve watched me there?”

“We could see you go in and out, yes.”

“Did you see them go in? When they went to kill Mrs. Tovia?

He shook his head sadly. “Not when they first went in. It was when a slick black car that we hadn’t seen before decided to pull up that our attention was caught. I went in, Lilly stayed on a line in case something happened. But I found you in the doorframe, unconscious.”

“You’re the one that called the police then?”

“You needed help, I turned you over to make sure your airways would function, but you were out I knew you needed to be looked over…I stayed with you and Shepherd until I heard sirens.” Sapph paused patting Shep, who was sagely sitting in the booth. “He was worried about you too, laying there whining next to you. Wasn’t too hard to make sure he wouldn’t follow me. It was also pretty lucky that no one else came up during that time, especially with all the mess out in the hall.”

Sera smacked her lips. “Yeah, murdering someone does that.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine, Sapph. Where else: the school, grocery store, the bar, my colleague’s home, the boys’ apartment? How far did this go?”

He smirked. “Far enough to see what goes on in a museum after hours.”

Her jaw slackened, mouth gaping slightly. “You two really followed me this whole time?”

He shrugged. “No, it took me a fair amount of time to find you. But it’s not like there are many people that share the same first name as you. Not everywhere either. I wanted to keep an eye out for you. So most new places or we thought something was off, if one of us were able to we’d see what you were up to.”

“Do you have any idea how fucked up that sounds, Sapph, you couldn’t just come to me?”

“It probably wasn’t the smartest idea,” he paused, shooting a glare at hearing Lilly snort, “I wanted you to make it without me. I’ve still been covering what needs to be, been popping in and out when a hit comes up, if something were to happen I didn’t want you part of that. It was selfish, I’ll admit, but I needed to know you were okay.”

Her hand went out, albeit a tad shaky to touch over his. “I think we both will be if we stop running from this. What do you say, braciszek?” (Brother)

He couldn’t help but smile at Sera’s upbeat tone. “I say, once we’re in there’s no turning around, we’re going to have to hit everything head on if we start this –“

Sera nodded. “I think we’re ready for that, knock this out once and for all. What about you Lilly?”

His gaze flicked to her too. That had been one of the first questions to pop from his sister. Why are you two together, when did this happen, why? It was simple enough to answer. Lilly wanted to help fight, and with, though it was subpar, her two years of medical training in college, her viable knowledge in first aid, and ability in falsifying paperwork with technology on top of that made it feasible to allow her to come with him. It didn’t happen too long after Sera had left, Lilly being one of the few people she still talked to from their past life. She had come to him soon after, wanting the same thing they had wanted, revenge and retribution. But having seen a fleeting look of contrite pass over his sister, he realized maybe that wasn’t something she anticipated anymore.

Lilly had been mainly mute this entire time. What she had been through had affected her, and rightly so. But she was continuous when it came to darting her eyes around a room, keeping still and silent to be able to hear anything and anyone out of place. At times going off into her own world. So with it accompanying the following question, he lifted his foot to her leg to jostle her.

“Sera asked –“

“I know and what I say is that I would like to grab a newspaper.”

Sera got out of the booth to let their friend out, him and her both following Lilly’s stride to the delivery man with his several bundles of fresh papers. His eyes went back to Sera watching her smirk and bite the inside of her cheek.

“What?”

“You and Lilly, huh?”

A lump formed in his throat, making him repeat the question though with a higher pitch. “What?”

“Come on, the girl on the phone, it was her, wasn’t it? And you’ve been going after her for how long? Since middle school pretty much?”

He sank in his seat sullen. “Doesn’t mean we’ve done anything, she turned me down all those times before, don’t know how you get shit like that in your head.”

Sera was grinning now, eyes in disbelief. “Holy Christ it is true. Are you just fuck buddies or…”

“Stop! And what’s with the Christ thing? You’ve been going with them to church. Does that mean you’re converting along with them too?”

She ignored his snide. “You know for a fact that religions always fascinated me. And you know I’d never go against our lineage, you better be cutting that out right now. I asked a legit question and you’re pouting like a baby.”

He threw his hands up. “I’m not pouting.”

She glared at him. “Of course you’re not.”

“I can’t help that I’m a little uncomfortable with all this, okay? The only guy you really dated was Zach, and he turned out to be a cheating asshole. After him, the only other guy you screwed was his brother and that was like –“

“That was an accident!”

“How was it an accident, he run into you the wrong way?”

“You know good and well I didn’t have a clue that it was Zach’s brother! The guy lived with their mom two states away, and he was gone away at school all the time so I never met him before then, and we parted ways as soon as I found out the next day. The whole thing was just awkward and weird.”

“But now it’s now?”

Her lips pursed. “But now it’s not.”

“I just don’t want a guy, let alone two, to take advantage of you.”

“They’re not. You know me; you know I wouldn’t put up with that. Even with what’s going on, more so, I wouldn’t put up with any type of abuse from anyone’s part.”

He stared her down. “We’ll see.”

She pointed a finger at him. “Hey, I just got you back, but I’m not giving them up either. They’re as much a part of this now as you or I. We’re going to have to look out for one another so you better shake whatever’s up your ass about it out of you and play nice.”

He grunted. “I’m always nice.”

“I can say with firsthand experience that, that is far from the truth.” Her body turned back to Lilly approaching their table. “What made you need a paper so bad?”

Lilly flipped it onto the table. “The headline caught my eye.”

Sapph peered over at where Lilly was pointing – The Saints of South Boston

He shrugged. “Why would it?”

But both girls ignored him, his sister scooting to the edge of the booth to read alongside, both pairs of eyes flitting down the page; at a certain point, Sera’s eyes widened, darting back up to Lilly.

“How?”

Sapphire was completely oblivious. “How what?”

Sera was overwrought. “Where do I even begin? How about how you even knew from glancing at the front page? Or how the hell did the reporters get their names?”

Lilly gave a one-sided smile. “All of you lived in South Boston and they are Catholics, right?”

“It’s about your boyfr – the guys you’re seeing?”

A small smile twitched on the corners of his sister’s mouth hearing his words. Maybe he could try, maybe.

“Yeah, they are. But how do you think their names got out so quick?”

Lilly shrugged. “Don’t know, unless one of the officers leaked it, or some journalists could’ve snooped around the place. People are bound to know them somewhere in the neighborhood.”

Sera was still studying the page with a scowl on her face. “I don’t get any of it. And where the hell does this “psychoanalyst” get off, all this literally just happened yesterday and this fucker says he’s been following the case. It’s over, there’s nothing to follow, and he thinks he has enough to call them remorseless killers. I was there, and know it was self-defense. If I –“

Sapph’s eyes softened, watching his sister cradle her head, chin almost on the table. He already knew the rest. If I hadn’t been there none of this would’ve happened. Seraphine was always the type to place blame on herself, and what churned his gut in fear was that it usually was aligned with someone she greatly cared for. He leaned across the table to cup her shoulder, eyes leveled with hers.

“If nothing. The paper says there were three, and we can take a guess who took out the other one. They would’ve been dead with another against them.”

“But if I –“

He shook her softly. “Stop! You said they’re in this now, and if they care that much about you then it shouldn’t matter. They’re alive, you’re alive. That’s it. You hear me?”

She nodded. “Yes.” She smiled. “I guess their plan did work.”

Lilly, who was still flipping through the pages turned to her. “Plan?”

“They didn’t want me to stay in the cell with them, because of all the reporters. I – I just really didn’t think any of them would have been able to come up with names this soon. We should take this to them.”

He looked at his watch. “Eh, it’s half past five, the sun will be out soon. You want to change your clothes or something before we go?”

“Unless Lilly has something on her, we’d have to go all the way back to – Rocco!”

He pinched his nose. “I’m lost again.”

“He’s their friend they sent me to stay the night with. He didn’t come home when he said he would, and I…I had a very vivid dream and needed to walk. He must be worried.”

Sera’s expression went off, and he knew she was keeping something from him. She could’ve been lying about the dream, or maybe she was having night terrors again. He wouldn’t fight about it now, but he’d bring it up when they had another chance to breathe.

“We’ll kill two birds then, you can tell him you’re fine, and change – you look like a mental patient.”

She peered down at herself. He couldn’t help the snicker that leaped out, took her enough time to realize she was clad in a pair of pajamas, hair mussed, and without make up the bruising of her nose and cast was a flashing sign on her face.

She glared at him, but then sighed in agreement.

The drive wasn’t too far off, the only thing standing out being Sera laughing at his vehicle when they pulled up in front of the apartment building.

“A van, huh? What are you trying to convey, a soccer mom?”

He snorted. “It’s inconspicuous, fits us in it, can sleep in it if we have to, and has room to transport…things. Besides, don’t act like we haven’t seen yours, I didn’t know Clark Griswold was selling his car.”

She shoved him, causing him to slip from the sidewalk against the van, laughing as she did so. The anger faded from her and she smiled back. Yes, he could try.

The door was thankfully, and stupidly unlocked when they got to the floor, Sera taking a look around before going all the way in.

“It doesn’t look like he’s here. I wonder if he came back at all last night…I hope he’s okay.”

It wasn’t a bad place, but it did smell of stale cigarettes, beer, and something of cheap perfume, he walked further in with his hands in his pockets, glancing at her. “Why wouldn’t he be?”

Sera grazed a thumb over her lip. “Roc’s got an unconventional job.”

“I know.”

She scowled.

“What you think someone’s just going to be able to find me and report on it without me knowing? As soon as he started asking, someone called me to watch out. I just don’t know his specifics.”

“He works delivery.”

“Of what? Drugs, people?”

“No! I don’t think so…never, people, I don’t know about drugs though.”

“He didn’t look Russian –“

“Italian.”

“I’ve no idea if that’s better or worse in that line. You going to get dressed or what?”

“Quit being pushy, I didn’t know we were in a hurry. I want to feed Gus real quick.”

“Who the hell’s Gus?”

On cue he heard loud screeching, spinning he saw the culprit was a large cat perched on the fire escape with his paws on the window.

He grinned, heading toward the window to open it. “Hey there fella, needing in?”

He could hear one of the cartons from the diner being opened. “That’s Gus, and I know I shouldn’t give them people food, there’s nothing here. I’m not letting him or Shep starve.”

The cat blasted in as soon as there was enough space to squeeze through, automatically backtracking to twine between his legs heading towards the shredded chicken Sera put on the floor.

“Cat’s more of a Pippa to me.”

His sister arched her brow. “Pippa? What kind of name is that for a cat?”

“Look at her! The cat would be sipping tea with a Kentucky Derby hat on if she could.”

“Okay, first off, it’s a male. Second, he’s a grumpy old man with a heart of gold.”

His eyes raked over the cat. “Bullshit. How do you even know it’s a boy?”

“Because he has balls, leave me alone so I can get ready!”

“I’m not stopping you. I’ll sit here with Pippa while you do whatever.”

“Gus!”

Hearing a door slam Sapph chuckled, he was kind of relaxed, the even pace that came with squabbling with a sibling it was normal. It would probably be an absurd thing to others that, that would be something to yearn after, but he had. Letting himself settle on the couch, the cat jumped up, done with its meal, and curled around him. He felt at ease, it was like he was in a familiar situation – a sort of déjà vu but he couldn’t put his fingers on it as to what memory it could be. Instead, he let his focus fall to Lilly, who had been silently taking in the surroundings, now observing the scene out the window.

“What are you thinking about?”

She shrugged, nonchalant, arms crossing over her chest. “It’s kind of convenient, isn’t it? To have someone this close and already one of us familiar with that is in the know of the happenings of the underground.”

“We have people in the know. It’s a good possibility that even with his help it wouldn’t do much. He’s in the Italian mafia, right? Just because they’re shimmying up to the Russian group doesn’t mean it’ll expand any further than a handshake.”

“Wouldn’t hurt to ask.”

He gave a huff, sitting back up. “We have a lead. I’m going to follow through on it tonight. If it doesn’t pan out we’ll see if Sera wants to delve into it further.”

Lilly didn’t say anything, but the hardening lines in her forehead began to disappear.

“I’m not saying put our feet up and do nothing, but just relax a little bit.”

He watched her posture straighten, muscles in her shoulder taut. “I want them dead.”

Watching her, hearing the words, it seemed he had been in this exact position not too long ago with Sera, but the ruthless demeanor appeared extinguished. If it was due to the two that she had become ardent with, then what did that leave with Lilly? He wouldn’t call what they had love per se but they cared for one another. Yet Lilly’s savage nature from her trauma had not lessened over the time they had been alone. Would she always be this way? Would revenge truly end it? He didn’t know, it was one of the handfuls of times that he agreed with his sister – he was tired. Did he want them to pay? Definitely. But he didn’t know how it would play out. You could plan each detail meticulously and it could still fall apart when put into action.

“You guys ready to go?”

In that small time, Sera must have taken a quick shower, hair now damp and in a bun, throwing on her coat over her sweater and jeans. Gazing at her face it appeared she had put on a dab of makeup.

“You have to doll up that much for them?”

She rolled her eyes. “I would say we’ve all had a rough few days, and I can’t help that the lack of sleep, busted nose, and bruises need to be concealed so why don’t you just hush. With this article out, do you think any more reporters will be over there for questions?”

Lilly shook her head. “Doubt it, it was three people, but it took place in the bad part of town, people hear about murders there every other day. If it had been in a ritzy part of town, well…But, no, hardly likely anyone will be there to follow up.”

“Good. I don’t really want them being caged in there for nothing.”

Lilly actually smiled on that. “Come on then, I’m ready to meet your Casanovas face to face.”

The tires screeched when he zoomed into the first available spot, causing hateful looks to be launched at him from the girls. Sera gathered herself, opening the car door.

“You’re not coming in?”

“I’m technically not here to pick anyone up, plus I’m not too enthused being around cops for too long. Won’t arrest the ones that need to be, but it’d be safe to say they’d throw cuffs on us if they had the chance.”

She nodded, and he was glad as he always was that his sister understood. No, they could claim self-defense, have witnesses, have all evidence for them – but in reality, they had killed and no matter their excuse they would be prosecuted to some extent of the things they’ve done to stay alive.

“I’ll be right back then.”

He watched her survey the inside, making him think there were certain ones she was avoiding, before entering. He leaned back his head hitting the headrest while Shep whined out the window.

“You’re fine, she’ll be back.”

Shep allowed himself to be patted, and Lilly shook her head in the back. “I’m surprised he remembers you.”

“What, why? I’ve been around him all his life, what’d you think several months would change anything?”

“Don’t know…seems like a good chunk of time for a dog.”

“Takes more than that to forget me.”

He heard her groan from the back of her throat, then feeling her hand touch his arm. “What do you think? About them in general?”

He had a good idea who she was referring to, and he couldn’t help the lump in his chest. “I don’t know. I just…don't. She says they’re good guys, but how well do you know someone in less than a year? Then she moves in with them suddenly…She’s different with them. I don’t want to lose her.”

“How would you lose her?”

He shrugged, hitting the bottom of his palm against the steering wheel. “Things have changed, her perception of me changed the very second I went to leave. She sees me abandoning her, now, with them, she could take off and live happily without me there. I should be happy about that, but I’m not.”

He could hear the smile in Lilly’s tone. “You’re jealous.”

It wasn’t a question. “Yeah, I guess I am. I think I’ve fucked up too much to make things right. And it’s stupid and warped but all I can think of is them ganging up on her, maybe they’re good men, I don’t know that. And THAT’S the thing driving me crazy. I don’t know a damn thing about them so what am I supposed to do?”

“Give them a chance, and keep that brotherly protection in check until you get to know them.”

He rolled his eyes. “That one’s got a smart mouth.”

“So do you, just play nice, and keep an eye out. We might not know them, but like you said, Sera says they’re good. She’s always been an accurate gauge on people, let’s wait it out and see.”


End file.
